[FourFifty]

Didn’t read them, sorry if I stole any jokes.


Torri: If elected president of the United States Of America, I will do my acceptance speech topless!
Carltio: She has my vote.


That would be the last time that Rico glued a wig on Kurt.


“Well, Ric told me that if I wanted to get ahead in this industry, I had to chain talent to me so no one can take it away.”


Long: Wow Mark Henry! You really lost a lot of weight after going on the Simon System!
Booker:Are you even listening to me! I am not Mar---
Long: How would you like a title shot, Mark Henry?
Booker: I’ll teach JBL why I’m the world’s strongest man!


Kidman: Chavo, I want to apologize for botching the shooting star press and taking you out of action.
Chavo: Man, no worries! It’s all good!
Kidman: Lemme guess… You’re Gellin’?
Chavo: Like a felon!


Raise your hand if you remember how the cw champion is!


Heidenreich: Are you sure I need this?
Dr. Allan Ways: Yes Mr. Heidenreich, it’s mandatory by state law.
Heidenreich: But all I said is I like the movie “Pearl Harbor.”
Dr. Allan Ways: And by that you prove you have no mental capacity.


Carlito: All I’m saying is that the original trilogy, before being digitally remastered, was is better than the new DVDs.
Long: No way! They first three were incomplete!


Mark: And then he told me to go fuck myself for using insider terms!
Eddie: That’s how Flair responded to you introducing yourself?


Heyman: You think Blacks have it bad? What about the Jews!?!?! Oh, so your people picked cotton. Well my people built the pyramids!!!!
Long: Must… Control… Fist…. Of…. Rage….
Heyman: Your people had a war to stop slavery! What did MY people have?


Rene: In France, we don’t shake hands, we hug!


RVD: Freaking imported ass-cannon! The barrel shoots to the side!


Vince: This isn’t want I meant when I told Booker T to carry JBL in the match!
Random Backstage Guy: But Mr. McMahon, ratings are on the rise!
Vince: This is exactly what I meant when I told Booker T to carry JBL in the march!


“Raw went WHERE, without inviting me! Dang!”




*The Following Caption Has Harsher Language Than Usual, And Is A Direct Quote From “Team America: World Police.” This Is Not Appropriate For Children, Highlight To Read*

Heyman: See there’s three kinds of people: Dicks, Pussies, and Assholes. Pussies think everyone can get along and Dicks just wanna fuck all the time without thinking it through. Then you got your Assholes! All the Assholes want is to shit all over everything! So Pussies may get mad at Dicks once in a while because Pussies get fucked by Dicks, but Dicks also fuck Assholes. And if they didn’t fuck the Assholes you know what you’d get? You’d get your Dick and your Pussy all covered in Shit!