"Watch out, Bischoff, I'm about to get FILM NOIR on your ass!"
It was a dark and stormy night. I had been wandering aimlessly through the streets of the city, unaware of what was to come. This whole deal stunk. Smelled like...And suddenly, I realised that someone had taken a shizzle on my forehead.
Chris asked me what I was willing to do to be famous...
...Which made eric smile with delight at my choice.
Even SNITSKY couldn't take these feet.
Ebonyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy and Ivoryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy...
Eugene: Oh no! Someone cut off her penis!
Eugene is honored to meet Kane Knight.
-OR-
It's a sad day for wrestling, when even the INDIANS are asked to use sunless tan.
Eugene barely got out of the way as a confused, low-flying American Bald Angle swooped down, mistaking his hair for a nesting spot.
The return of...
MATT HARDY!
Matt: That's not me!
Let me tell you, brother. That ain't no Version 1, brother.
(In unision): What? That's not Matt Hardy!
Vince was pleased to announce that Matt was now endorsing his own brand of steroids...
-OR-
Vince: Let's see, shown up by the fans, check. Eating crow, check. I know, I'll make it look like it was MY IDEA.
Matt tells the crowd how many shows left before his push is over.
"This goes out to Shannon, I love you sweety..."
Venis was confused. Why was he being beaten by one of the Village People?
"Larry" Tried hard not to laugh at HBK complaining about Hogan's backstage politics
"Lete me tell you somethign brother. When the Hulkster remembers where he parked his car..."
Carlito: And den wur gonna let Snitsky have your feet.
Jericho: And let Vince play with your grapefruits.
The all WWE revue of Swan Lake was only marginally less popular than Katie Vick
"Now it's my turn, Eric, and this...CHIA PET is going where the sun don't shine."
Cena missed, leaving Jericho with the most painful injury of his life.
"What's this? There's actually an MP3 player in here? DAMN YOU, CENA!"
Jericho was pissed. Someone had replaced all his Fozzy CDs with pancakes.