[M-A-G]

Superstars: November 29, 2040

20-Minute Opening Promo of Doom Time! It's the new Women's Champion, Sonya Braddock coming out to join us. Braddock brings up the fact that this is her 6th championship and winning it the sixth time was every bit as sweet as the first time. Actually, that's a bit of a lie, because she savored every minute she was beating down Naomi Bailey at Survivor Series and hearing her scream out and bang the mat puts that night above almost everything else. Naomi's reign was a house of cards that was bound to collapse and Sonya was more than happy to be the bulldozer that ruined everything for Naomi. Sonya is ready to put her own house back in order and she wants to let both Leah and Jenna Kyle know that whoever wins tonight, they'll be walking into the same force that obliterated Naomi.

Well that's obviously going to be enough to cause Naomi Bailey herself to come out to the stage to snap back at this. Naomi scoffs at Sonya's choice of words as everyone can see that she's clearly up and about and ready to kick ass at a moment's notice. Naomi is here to rain on the parade of the phony champion because she has proof that Sonya does not deserve to be holding that title! She wants everyone to pay attention to the Tron as she replays the final moments of the match from Sunday and she'll explain. We, of course, see Naomi locked in the Calf Crusher as she's fighting for the ropes trying to get a break before ultimately submitting. Naomi asks us if we all see what she's talking about. "Here, I'll play it back again, slow enough for you morons to see it!" The footage replays the part where Naomi is flailing her arms towards the ropes and she narrates the proceeds. "THERE! You see that? I'm waving my arms and you can CLEARLY SEE that my fingertips pass under the bottom rope! That should've broken the hold! The referee should've broken the hold and the match should've continued and had it continued, I would've obliterated YOUR ass, Sonya, and I would've kept MY Women's Title! How can you stand there in front of everyone and be proud of stealing that title. If you were any kind of woman, you'd hand that thing over RIGHT NOW!"

Sonya doesn't look like she's keen on that idea as she offers her take on the matter. "First of all, I don't even see what the hell you're even talking about. But if you want the belt so much, you're more than welcome to come and get it your damn self." With that, Sonya tosses both the mic and Women's Title in front of her on the ground and gestures for Naomi to come on down. Naomi ponders this for a bit and ultimately decides to take Sonya up on that offer and makes her way down. We got ourselves a fight! It's a back-and-forth bit before Sonya is able to take Naomi down and looks to lock in a Calf Crusher but Naomi escapes that pretty quickly and decides to fight another day by bailing. She leaves still angry and yelling back at the champion.

First Match: Orlando Kincaid vs. Michael Haywood
Fucking awesome opener. Kincaid declares he's going to beat on Ryan Pattillo's boy to send a message, but that's easier said than done as Haywood isn't going down so easily. Ziggy Styles, of course, just has to come down to make a niusance of himself. This triggers Haywood's programming and he goes into his rage subroutine to get him some of Ziggy. Ziggy tries running back into the ring as Haywood chases him down with a chair. He takes a swing but Ziggy ducks and runs away and Kincaid takes the hit instead. That's enough for the DQ, but Haywood's CPU doesn't register this and directs him to continue the pursuit on Ziggy. *****, 94% overall.

Backstage, Jenna Kyle is prepping for her match tonight against Leah when she's joined by her partner Faith Connors. Jenna is happy to see Faith back up on her feet after Sunday, but Faith clarifies that she's still not cleared until Monday. That Dusk bitch really knows how to make it hurt. Faith is here in support of Jenna's efforts tonight. Jenna is grateful and declares that this has been a long time coming between her and Leah and hopefully things get settled. Then Jenna can go on to become Women's Champion at Bragging Rights. It'll go great with all the Slammys she's going to win next week. Faith points out that the two of them are going to win some Slammys. She's heard talk that the two of them are leading in the Moment of the Year category. Jenna, however, points out that only one of them can win Woman of the Year. Faith isn't worried as she thinks she's got it in the bag. Jenna counters that she's got tonight in the bag. We'll see how it all plays out next week. Faith wishes her luck as she takes her leave.

Second Match: Zed Jones and Galino & Farnes vs. Nigel Gallagher and the British Infection
Michael Hotbody is FURIOUS over Ian Moore's appearance on Monday. He hogs up almost all of Hotbody's time and then drops the nonsense that Lyle Morris is still going to get a Cruiserweight Title shot tomorrow?!? UNACCEPTABLE!!! Michael Hotbody means business! He led one of the most dominant teams in Survivor Series history to GLORIOUS VICTORY on Sunday and they're going to demonstrate that again here tonight! Lyle Morris is in for one of the worst nights of his life on SmackDown! because Hotbody is going to take out all of his frustrations on him and walk out the champion! This is another sweet outing. It comes down to Zed and Exley as the legal men. The British Infection look to end things by setting up Zed for the Queen's English but Luscious grabs their legs. As they each turn around, Zed clobbers them both from behind and he stacks up Exley using the ropes for the pin. Clubber Harris makes his way out looking like he wants a piece of Zed, but Hotbody calls him off and the heels take their leave. ****1/2, 89% overall.

Backstage once more as this time Jake Connelly is walking down a hallway until he gets confronted again by Cameron Harper. Harper wants to know if Connelly has made up his mind about Harper's proposal. Harper feels slighted that someone like Connelly hasn't come to him to be his mentor. What does Ethan Lang have that Cameron Harper doesn't? Connelly answers that Lang has patience for one thing. Connelly is always keen on picking up more clients but he's got to do it wisely. He's open to managing Harper, but right now he's got his hands full as he's got the Lady Liberties in a match next. He promises Harper they'll talk later.

Third Match: Ainsley and Debra Phillips vs. The Lady Liberties
Debra wants to apologize to Ainsley for what went down on Raw. She knows she overstepped by hogging all the spotlight and not working with Ainsley. She promises to make up for that tonight. Debra keeps her word and allows Ainsley the chance to start the match. Actually, she pretty much just lets Ainsley do all the work and doesn't even want to tag in, even when Ainsley is in trouble. The Liberties end it by hitting Stars and Stripes on Ainsley for the win as Debra walks away. What a bitch. ****, 77% overall. Hey, they didn't get smoked from following the previous match.

Fourth Match: Seth Von Kamp vs. Jason Sorola
Sorola is quite full of himself as he brags about eliminating Gavin Jones on Sunday. He's riding a high that he hasn't felt in a while. He deserves some kind of reward for his efforts. He calls out Seth on his claim of being a fighting champion and dares him to put his money where his mouth is and agree to make this match for the Intercontinental Title. Sorola deserves it. He's a former champion himself and it'll be one more thing he can rub in the face of Gavin Jones! Seth has no problem with this idea and agrees so we have ourselves a bonus for this match as it's now a title affair. Sorola levels the playing field by keeping it on the mat and working the arm to make up for the size difference. Here comes the finish as Sorola knocks down both Seth and the referee off a springboard crossbody. He gets cocky and goes to grab the title belt but things aren't done yet between him and Gavin Jones as Gavin himself runs down to get him some of Sorola. Sorola does the smart thing by getting the hell out of there and the two go into the crowd. Both the ref and Seth recover to find no one else in the ring so the ref decides to just count out Sorola and award the match to Seth. *****, 95% overall.

Fifth Match: Leah vs. Jenna Kyle
Paul Andrews makes it clear that there is respect for Jenna Kyle from both himself and Leah, but it's a dog-eat-dog business and the prize of getting to wrestle for the Women's Title at Bragging Rights is too tempting and it's only fitting that a top talent like Leah gets that spot, no offense to Jenna. This match rules, of course. Probably their best outing to date. Things unfortunately have to get a bit screwy as Nathan Quinn wanders out here and gets the attention of Paul Andrews. Andrews and Quinn exchange some words and the ref gets on their case. Hannah McCormick sneaks in from behind with her Tag Team Title belt unbeknowst to either competitor and jumps onto the apron as Leah whips Jenna towards her. Jenna reverses, however, and Leah collides with Hannah and Jenna catches Leah off the rebound with an inside cradle and the ref turns around to count the pin, giving the win to Jenna and sending her to Bragging Rights. ****1/2, 91% overall.

More SPORTZ ENTERTAINMENT! time as Eddy Clash sees fit to join us in the ring and address Survivor Series. He was having the time of his life on Sunday beating up Brandon Reigns. Then, out of nowhere, we've got the return of the lunatic known as Hugo. Why now? What does he want? Eddy thinks he's entitled to some answers so he's offering Hugo the opportunity to come on out here like a sane person and bare his soul to everyone. Maybe he has some deep reasoning behind his thought process. Maybe he can captivate us with his words and feelings. Eddy is certainly open to hearing Hugo out...then he'll shove this giant fist of his down Hugo's throat. "So come on out here, Hugo. You obviously have something on your mind if you were going to be such a party pooper this week. You're more than welcome to come out here and ruin this party if you got the guts."

Eddy remains facing the stage during his pleas and thus doesn't see Hugo coming up from behind him and entering the ring and commencing a beat down. This guy really is out of control. It's hoss on hoss brutality that spills to the outside. Hugo preps the announce table and sends Eddy through it with a powerbomb. Hugo evidently is going to pass on explaining himself verbally as we get some officials down to check on Eddy.

Sixth Match: Mathias vs. Ronnie Costello
Brooke wants to rundown her clients and especially gets on Ronnie's case for not backing up Salvatore Scabbia when he really needed it on Raw. She demands that everyone fall in line. Everyone on her team needs to be on the same page. No petty personal gripes, no egos. She's seen the interactions between Carmella and Cordelia these past few shows and she wants to nip this in the bud. The match goes on fine enough. The end comes when Ronnie pulls the ref in front of him to block a charge from Mathias. Mathias pumps the brakes and moves the ref out of the way, but that opens him up to getting whacked in the nuts from kick by Costello and he gets stacked up with Costello putting his feet on the ropes for leverage for the win. Randy Ellis decides to get him some of Ronnie and he comes down afterwards to get a few shots in before Ronnie retreats. ****1/2, 89% overall.

MAIN EVENT: Kyle Jacobs and Alexander Piero vs. Xavier Cross and Chris Collins
Collins dares the faces to show how good they really are now that it's going to be an actual level playing field. He also wants to challenge Piero for one final one-on-one encounter between them to finally settle things and hopefully Collins can move on to better things. Cross adds that it's a travesty that he and Collins were denied the opportunity to be in the hunt for the Unified World Title, all because of these two young punks. The one saving grace is that they didn't get past Monday and now they're going to get their punishment for Survivor Series on top of that! This is an awesome close to the show as the rating will attest. The end comes down to Piero and Cross as the legal men. Cross tries a roll up, using his feet on the ropes, but Madison is all, "That was the finish to the last match" and thus knocks his feet off. Collins sees this after disposing of Jacobs and starts to go after her. She tries another slap like on Sunday, but Collins catches her and picks her up and starts to carry her off. Piero sees this and tries to go after the two but Cross yanks him back and into a Cross Cutter to steal the pin. Collins dumps Madison and laughs at their misfortune as we go off the air. ****1/2, 93% overall.

Overall show rating: 88% overall

Much better than the last two outings. This sparks joy.