the STUPID NOOB faction spoof

**Corkscrewed** · 12-09-2003, 04:14 AM

Shameless, Thick, and Unskilled Posters with Intelligence Deficiencies
Nationally Organized Order and Brotherhood

The setting is in an abandoned warehouse in the dumps someplace. In this trashy setting, many people incredibly lacking in that think known as common sense gather.

StoneColdStunners: *steps up to podium* Okay I now call to order the first meeting of the Shameless, Thick, and Unskilled Posters with Intelligence Deficiencies Nationally Organized Order and Brotherhood, or STUPID NOOB. Its nice to see everyone made it I want to welcome you and stone cold rules and I love him but I see we have some new people here so lets introduce ourselves

Beerondope: hi i'm beerondope I think wrestling gay you but okay wheres ric flair

StoneColdStunners: Um... okay. Welcome to my FACTION. We're gonna go murder JR and wrestle him because I love HGA but I typo.

J.R.s a closeted HLAlover: Kill JR? Hell yeah! I ****ing hate JR! He's nothing but a homo! He should be burned and I'll eat his testicles. He's stupid and imbecile and he has a huge boner for Austin cuz he orgasms everytime steve comes to the ring!!!

StoneColdStunners: So do I.

Everythingfan13: I orgasm when I see Shane. He's sooo cute! I love him! *sighs* He's my favorite wrestler in the whole world!

UndesputedWorldChampion: My Survivor Series PPV

A-Train: Hi, I'm A-Train and I love to hump A-Train. He's so furry and rough in the sack, and I suck his hard cock every day. Yum Yum.

StoneColdStunners: Um. I think you're banned. Go away.

Wrestling god: Backstage officials are currently high on John Cena. Even though he lost his match with Benoit, the current plan is for him to feud with the Big Show and win the U.S. Title, then ease him into the main event scene after Benoit finishes his feud with Lesnar.

Sushi-Z: John Cena sucks.

UndesputedWorldChampion: Lesnar beat Goldberg using his submission finisher last month will Goldberg get even or is Brock the next Big Thing find out tonight!

MAdoubleT: You know who sucks? Goldberg. HE IS A DISGRACE TO THE SPORT!!! He is a terrible champion and he makes the title a JOKE! He knows only three ****ing moves and he's stupid and gay!!! I hate Goldberg!!!

SMA467: You know who's gay? Rey Mysterio. He doesn't deserve a DVD

RVDFAN1: Oh my gosh! Did you say RVD? He's so awesome! Hes the best wrestlers in the world because hes cool I want to be just like him because he is my idol I love robvan dam

UndesputedWorldChampion: Rodney Mack vs mark henry
Winner: henry
Mack fought hard but Henry was too big and he hit him with his finisher and won and teddy long said Henry was the best wrestler ever belee dat playa!

SMA467: I said "DVD" you idiot

TAKERFAN1: Don't mess with my little brother! I'll have my XTREME CHAMPIONSHIP
WRESTLING kill you! We're gonna take some flaming barbed wire 2x4's and nail your head to a shed! Don't you pick on my brother!

ShannonFan: That sounds hardcore! Would you like to join the fed I'm opening up? We're going to have a hardcore taped fist triple ladder in a hell in the cell flaming tables chainsaw juggling rabid guard dog electric dildo on a pole match for the championship!!!

TAKERFAN1:

UndesputedWorldChampion: Bckstage vince is making out with Sable and then Dawn marie comes and says she and heyman want to join so then Vince says okay and says they'll go to the Hilton, and then Paris Hilton comes on and says she'll tape it and they're like okay because she's hot.

Bizzle: I've created an official petition because I don't want Austin back. I hate him. Sign my petition.

StoneColdStunners: What the hell? Austin is the best ever how can you not like austing becase he's the man and I htate you!!!

Wrestling god: Billy Gunn injured his groin and is out three months. Billy Kidman will be back in time for Royal Rumble. Edge is expected to feud with Rhyno when he comes back, claiming that it was Rhyno to took him out.

Joerapp: yo yo yo, it's joe rapp in the house and I'm gonna kick it freestyle. StoneColdStunners, you're a ****ing idiot. I'm gonna ****ing kill your ass, dawg, you don't know nothing.
I sit back with this pack of Zig Zags and this bag
of this weed it gives me the shit needed to be
the most meanest MC on this -- on this Earth
And since birth I've been cursed with this curse to just curse
And just blurt this berserk and bizarre shit that works
And it sells and it helps in itself to relieve
all this tension dispensin these sentences
Gettin this stress that's been eatin me recently off of this chest
and I rest again peacefully (peacefully)..
but at least have the decency in you
to leave me alone, when you freaks see me out
in the streets when I'm eatin or feedin my daughter
to not come and speak to me (speak to me)..
I don't know you and no,
I don't owe you a mo-ther****-in thing
I'm not Mr. N'Sync, I'm not what your friends think
I'm not Mr. Friendly, I can be a prick
if you tempt me my tank is on empty (is on empty)..
No patience is in me and if you offend me
I'm liftin you 10 feet (liftin you 10 feet).. in the air
I don't care who is there and who saw me destroy you
Go call you a lawyer, file you a lawsuit
I'll smile in the courtroom and buy you a wardrobe
I'm tired of all you (of all you)..
I don't mean to be mean but that's all I can be is just me

SPD10000: Should Eminem battle John Cena at Wrestlemania?

SPD10000: Should Hulk Hogan come back?

SPD10000: Should Scott Hall come back?

SPD10000: Should X-Pac come back?

SPD10000: Should Psycho Sid come back?

SPD10000: Should Kevin Nash come back?

MAdoubleT: Shut the **** up, you annoying prick! None of them should come back, and for that matter, neither should Goldberg. He should lose the title to someone. Anyone. Even RVD. I don't care. That man is a ****ing disgrace to the ****ing sport! Anyone who disagrees with me is a ****ing prick, because I'm the ****ing man, and even though I don't ****ing have any ****ing legitimate argument, and even though others ****ing have proven me wrong, they're ****ing gay ass queers because I'm ****ing right.

*at that moment, a middle-aged mother enters the room*

Mother: Matt? Am I hearing that language from you again? It thought we discussed this, young man. You're grounded. And I'm taking you back home from this filthy trash hole. How can you even come here?

MAdoubleT: What the ****, mom? How can you do this? You can't ****ing do this. This is ****ing shit stupid. ****, you can't ****ing ground me, mom! It's not ****ing fair! I'm right! You can't ****ing do this!!!

Mother: I've told you this before. If I hear that language again, I'm destroying your computer. Now, GET IN THE CAR!!!!

MAdoubleT: Yes mommy.

UndesputedWorldChampion: Eddie Guerrero vs Chavo Guerrero (Street Fight)
Winner: Eddie Guerrero
Chavo almost hurt Eddie, but Eddie didn't want ot fight chavo cuz he's his nephew, but chavo wanted to and he fought hard but eddie cheated with the trash can and hit his finishering move and pinn chavo

Wrestling god: The current plan is to have Lance Storm continue his "Ladies Man" gimmick. He will eventually feud with Christian after Jericho turns face and feuds with Christian.

StoneColdStunners: Do you ever give sources? Stop stealing!

Mikey The Man: Yeah! I'm the original plagiarizer, and only I can do that!

Wrestling god: I always get it from PWS you pussy!

Mikey The Man: **** you!!!

*the two get into a fight and roll out into the alley, punching, kicking, and groping*

StoneColdStunners: Yeah. Well, now we have to vote for our official diva because they're hot but we have to choose one who's super hot, like Austin is hot, but he's a guy and not a diva.

Amity McMachon: I want my Stephanie!!!! null[/LIST][LIST]

MMMM...BEEFY: Oh, do you have nude pics of any of the divas? I love them. Trish is so hot, I wish I could see her naked. I'd touch the picture of her breasts.

Bischoff2K: I'd touch Tony Schiavonne��s breasts. He's the best announcer in the world.

Genetic Freak: What the ****ing hell are you ****ing talking about, you ****er! You're a ****ing idiotic shitbag, bitch! Besides, the real travesty is Scott ****ing Steiner, the Genetic Freak! I ****ing can��t ****ing believe he's ****ing being ****ing treated like a ****ing pussy, ****ing feuding with ****ing no one and with that ****** Test. He's much ****ing better than that! If you ****ing think Steiner sucks, you ****ing suck. Everyone else ****ing sucks. Austin's a ****er. Triple H ****ing should die. **** you all!!!

Bischoff2K: See, you're stupid. Why do you always complain? Why can't you really just enjoy the show? Instead, you complain about every little thing. Why can't you be like me? I'm better than you because I enjoy thinks.

Genetic Freak: What the ****? Who the ****ing shit are you? You ****ing pussy! You ****ing want to ****ing enjoy shit? Enjoy this ****er!!!

*Genetic Freak punches out Bischoff2K, then stomps out muttering how the WWE should give Steiner the World Title*

**Corkscrewed** · 12-09-2003, 04:15 AM

UndesputedWorldChampion: Backstage, we see Sable, Dawn Marie, Heyman, and Vince in a fourway, and then Torrie walks in and she's shocked, but the four say join us and she does. Then Mr. Ass comes in and strips and everyone has a party.

Red neck wrassler fan: I challenge you undesputedchampion!!!!

Ilt_undertaker: You know what? I think if you challenged the Undertaker, you'd lose because he��s the best wrestler ever! I love him!

Everythingfan13: Shane is hotter. I'd blow him if I could. LOVE!!!!

Ilt_undertaker: I can't get a job. My parents won't let me.

Everythingfan13: What's that have to do with anything? *turns* Oh Shane! My lover! My idol! My one and only true one! I must have you!!!

Ilt_undertaker: Wow, this is too weird even for me. I'm outta here.

GeorgeCarlin: Vince Lambado's doing an awesome job right now

MMMM...BEEFY: Does anyone have any nude pics of Britney Spears? I could lick her.

UndesputedWorldChampion: Kane vs Goldberg
Winner and still champion: Kane
Goldberg was angry and speared kane but Kane sat up so Goldberg did it again but Kane didn't die so he speare d him three times but Kane didn't get pinned so then Kane gave Goldberg the chokeslammed but he kickedout and then goldbert try to jackhammer Kane but kane reersed it and hit his finisher an dpinned Goldberg
When he won, undertaker suddenly ran out and beat the crap out of kane and then the lights went out and whenthey came back on, no one was there. They disappeared!!!

WRAITH: Hey guys! Isn't it about time that Giant Gonzales comes back?

StoneColdStunners: No.

The Sensei of Mattitude: You know what? Version ONE should stay on SD! He's awesome and he's the best bad guy. I know everything.

MMMM...BEEFY: Hardy sucks. So do Benoit, Angle, and Cena. You know who rules? Atrain, Big Show, Orlando Jones, Nathan Jones, and Steiner. They rule!!!

WRAITH: Isn't it about time that Nathan Jones and Orlando Jones should form a tag team called THE JONES and win the titles?

UnleashedF5P.I.M.PG-Unit: The Master of the F-5 is here to break it down, folks! What the guy above me said is totally stupid. Brock Lesnar is a MONSTER and would beat them both by himself. And you know, I know the F-5 hurts, and he'd wreck HAVOC on people because I would F-5 them to hell!!!

Beerondope: you more stoned dan Iam

Red neck rassler fan: itstue I make more since than you do and I have no grammer skills atlal I challenge you, Undesputechamp!!!!!!

WorldUndesputedChampion: Triple is backstage and he is gonna fight Orton and Ric Flair says watch out beause new evolution is going to be after him and triple H says he's the game.

Doctor_Gonzo: Hey guys!!!! According to MY EXCLUSIVE SOURCE, Mark Henry recently ATE The Hurricane. He reported his stomach was like a storm. When he pooped Hurricane out, he said WASSUP WIDDAT???
Bret Hart recently ate one more grape than he planned. Our condolences go out to the Hart family.
Jericho will have a baby with Trish Stratus. This baby will feud with Stephanie's baby in the first ever HARDCORE DIAPER ON A POLE MATCH!!!

J.R.s a closeted HLAlover: What the name of the next WWE PPV?

MMMM...BEEFY: Does anyone have naked pictures of Christina Aguilera? I'm feeling dirty.

J.R.s a closeted HLAlover: Who was the IC champion the longest in 2000?

The Sensai of Mattitude: Matt Hardy should be the new IC champion. He's the best guy ever man!!!

*Genetic Freak stomps back in*

Genetic Freak: Shut the **** up! You're a ****ing moron! Steiner should ****ing be the ****ing awesome ass IC champ, you **** nut! He should have all the ****ing belts. And he's ****ing sexy in his purple thong! If you disagree with me, ****you!!!!

*punches outSensai of Mattitude and stalks back out*

Doctor_Gonzo: According to MY EXCLUSIVE SOURCE, J.R.s a closeted HLAlover recently gave a blow job to JR and will be out 3-4 weeks due to BBQ sauce poisoning. Also,
UnleashedF5P.I.M.PG-Unit knocked himself out when he F-5'ed himself while showering.
Bret Hart woke up five minutes late today. Our condolences go out to the Hart family.
Triple H recently sprained his penis going to hard in the missionary position with Stephanie. He is expected to miss 2 weeks of TV and 3 weeks in bed.

StoneColdStunners: Okay, okay! Lets have some order here! Okay, to those of you who are left, what shall we do?

UndesputedWorldChampion: Vince comes out in his boxers and says he's really happy, so he's gonna make a new match and it's funaki vs Paul London for the WWE champ, and Brock Lesnar is no longer champ now. Lesnar comes out and is mad so he hits the fnisher on Vince and then he takes a chair and beats the crap out of London and Funaki who comeout. Then spanky comes out and bites Lesnar and then pinshim to be new champion.

WRAITH: Isn't it about time Ultimate Warrior came back with his streamers and crazy music?

Red neck rassler fan: I still waitng for challenge undisputed champ I'm gonna kick your ass you sucka!!!

Sushi-Z: Hey, he's dead. It's not going to happen.

UndesputedWorldChampion: No I'm not. I said I was sorry.

Red neck rassler fan: Whoa, he's dead?

UndesputedWorldChampion: No! I'm right here.

Sushi-Z: Yeah. Died of leukemia. His dad told us so too.

UndesputedWorldChampion: I'm right here guys.

Red neck rassler fan: Whoa. Damn. Well, I have no reason to be here.

UndesputedWorldChampion: I'm not dead!

Collecter of the dead: He says he's not dead.

Sushi-Z: *to collector* He will be in a moment. *to Red neck* Yeah, no reason, really. Poor guy died of leukemia, so there's no challenge now.

UndesputedWorldChampion: Hello? Can't you hear me?

Red neck rassler fan: Oh. Well I��m out now then. Cya

StoneColdStunners: Hello? Guys? Is there even anyone here at all?

LOUIEANDERSON: Hi everyone! I��m Louie Anderson! You might remember me from being the former host of Family Feud and I had that show on FOX. You know, I'm really a big wrestling fan, and I've come here to share my great opinions. Yup, you're in the presence of a star!!!

StoneColdStunners: Shit. This ain��t worth it. I'll go kill JR and wrestle him by myself. Cya LOUIE.

LOUIEANDERSON: So really, I'm Louie Anderson. I'm not lying either, and don't call me an ass either. I've come to usher in a new rev-- Hello...?

=====================

Okay, so it's kinda late, so that spoof might have sucked. Anyway, I had some time and decided to write this as a followup... a sort of sequel (with no actual storyline relation) to another old spoof that I did when I was The Captioneer. Anyway, this was inspired the recent influx of stupid n00bs. I browsed the forums over the past year, but I might have missed some really stupid people. If I did, I��m sorry. Thanks to Dude Love for helping me a bit with a list of idiots. Unfortunately, I lost that list, so I'm not sure if I got some of his suggestions. Some of these people (well, two) are from a while ago too. Like A-Train and LOUIEANDERSON.

Old spoof I did: http://www.tpww.net/cgi-bin/ultimate...c&f=1&t=013147

=====================

Thanks for reading!

**Corkscrewed** · 12-09-2003, 04:15 AM

Archive this, RDD, dammit! < / cheap way of increasing post count until original post count is restored >

**Rammsteinmad** · 12-09-2003, 07:42 AM

lol, good stuff.

(Do we all get our old post counts back? I was at about 4500...

)

**Kane Knight** · 12-09-2003, 02:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rammsteinmad

lol, good stuff.

(Do we all get our old post counts back? I was at about 4500...

)

There's a thread in the feedback to get 'em.

This was awesome the first time. And thus far, no STUPID NOOB responses bitching about you damn spoofs.

**Disturbed316** · 12-09-2003, 07:48 AM

Its as if they we actually saying it

**Hired Hitman** · 12-09-2003, 02:15 PM

**StoneColdStunner** · 12-09-2003, 02:26 PM

uhuh...well its very funny

men...you did forgett about yourself, but it was all nice and stuff because this is also a waist of Thread...and i got another comment: my native language ain't English...it's Dutch...you know Corkey- Holland...well won't suprise me that you did not no where it is...( it think this country sucks...Holland that is AMERICA Rules). But that's another story...well liked this thread and from now on i will not wright any boring Threads...i promise

(sorry for this boring thread reply)
P.S. You still love me right?

**Kane Knight** · 12-09-2003, 02:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by StoneColdStunner

uhuh...well its very funny

men...you did forgett about yourself, but it was all nice and stuff because this is also a waist of Thread...and i got another comment: my native language ain't English...it's Dutch...you know Corkey- Holland...well won't suprise me that you did not no where it is...( it think this country sucks...Holland that is AMERICA Rules). But that's another story...well liked this thread and from now on i will not wright any boring Threads...i promise

(sorry for this boring thread reply)
P.S. You still love me right?

Guess I missed this one...

Then again, I can't really tell if this is praise or blame. It's that unreadable.

**StoneColdStunner** · 12-09-2003, 02:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kane Knight

Guess I missed this one...

Then again, I can't really tell if this is praise or blame. It's that unreadable.

**Kane Knight** · 12-09-2003, 02:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by StoneColdStunner

You're happy to be unreadable?

Most non-english speakers at least try.

**Corkscrewed** · 12-10-2003, 03:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by StoneColdStunner

uhuh...well its very funny

men...you did forgett about yourself, but it was all nice and stuff because this is also a waist of Thread...and i got another comment: my native language ain't English...it's Dutch...you know Corkey- Holland...well won't suprise me that you did not no where it is...( it think this country sucks...Holland that is AMERICA Rules). But that's another story...well liked this thread and from now on i will not wright any boring Threads...i promise

(sorry for this boring thread reply)
P.S. You still love me right?

I know where the Netherlands is, so don't think I'm stupid. I also know you're Dutch. But I know a ton of Dutch people online with much better English than you. So

,

, and

.

**StoneColdStunner** · 12-10-2003, 04:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Corkscrewed

I know where the Netherlands is, so don't think I'm stupid. I also know you're Dutch. But I know a ton of Dutch people online with much better English than you. So

,

, and

.

Well that's true...but on school i always have a A+ for my English.
It's True really. And i live in the Netherlands that is true...
But i ain't Dutch, I am Half Italian and Half Surinam (Black)
You see i can't help it.

**loopydate** · 12-10-2003, 01:41 PM

Isn't Dutch the closest language grammar-wise to English? I seem to remember that from the linguistics class I took junior year. They both stem from the same root language (proto-Germanic, if I'm not mistaken), so have very similar cadence and punctuation. That said, shouldn't it be EASIER for someone who's Dutch to do this than someone from another country?

Also, speaking of ethnicities, that's an excuse. I'm part German, but you don't see me putting out illegible posts.

**Kane Knight** · 12-10-2003, 02:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by StoneColdStunner

Well that's true...but on school i always have a A+ for my English.

It can't be a very advanced grade of English, if you have an A+. For example, it should be "in school," "I" should be capitalized, it should be "an" and not "a," "B" in "But" should be capitalized, and "..." is properly finished with a "." to denote a complete thought.

I can't help but wonder if you're lying.

**Splaya** · 12-10-2003, 05:31 PM

I'm just staying out of this one

**Splaya** · 12-10-2003, 10:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ricky

What the fuck did you just post for then?

You stupid cunt.

I hate you

12-11-2003, 12:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by splaya

I hate you

ouch.

lol, Ricky, I really misjudged you. Your a good man. Way to knock down these little bitches.

**Nowhere Man** · 12-11-2003, 12:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ricky

What the fuck did you just post for then?

You stupid cunt.

Charming.

Anyways, Corkscrewed's spoof still kicks all kinds of ass after reading it the third time around. Good job, laddie.

**Paranoid Rattlesnake** · 12-11-2003, 11:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ricky

What the fuck did you just post for then?

You stupid cunt.

That was lame.

Trust me, it was.

**Sickboy** · 12-10-2003, 06:12 PM

This one is still funny!

**TheJShow** · 12-10-2003, 09:17 PM

**ilt_undertaker** · 12-10-2003, 09:21 PM

I feel famous! But seriously, i thought the "spoof" was really funny

**Popojiju** · 12-10-2003, 11:31 PM

I love it LOL, this was great. Glad my name wasn't in this. Hahaha! :thumbsup

**Corkscrewed** · 12-11-2003, 04:29 PM

haha. "nob"

**Showstopper** · 02-28-2004, 11:06 AM

Actually, I used to know TAKERFAN1 and RVDFAN1.

**Corkscrewed** · 02-28-2004, 11:52 PM

Damn. THAT was a bumped thread. And not by DX Fantic either! (not that I mind this time

)

**Boondock Saint** · 02-28-2004, 11:54 PM

Haha, way to bump. wtf

**Corkscrewed** · 02-29-2004, 12:02 AM

If you'll notice... it was Showstopper who bumped it.

If you were talking to him and not me, you never read this.

**Shaggy** · 02-29-2004, 12:05 AM

That is some funny stuff right there

(runs knowing hes probably the next up for this list)

**Boondock Saint** · 02-29-2004, 12:19 AM

Showstopper I know you bumped this. To clarify things, you are the one who bumped this. Nobody else did.

**Corkscrewed** · 02-29-2004, 04:17 AM

LOL

**StoneColdStunner** · 12-09-2003, 02:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ricky

Not that there is anything wrong with jobbing to me.

Hmm...well yes i love you 2 can't you just back off BIATCH...don't make me get up from my chair and get angry

**Paranoid Rattlesnake** · 12-11-2003, 11:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ricky

Shut the fuck up.

Paranoid Rattlesnake, you're not allowed to use the same arguments as me. As you say, that's a double standard, but fuck you.

splay, you're just a nob
(hopefully your offended. I put a lot of thought into that)

Awww diddums

**Splaya** · 12-12-2003, 09:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ricky

Shut the fuck up.

Paranoid Rattlesnake, you're not allowed to use the same arguments as me. As you say, that's a double standard, but fuck you.

splay, you're just a nob
(hopefully your offended. I put a lot of thought into that)

hey bitch its noob. And yes i am one whats ur point?

**Razor Rybek** · 02-28-2004, 04:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by splaya

hey bitch its noob. And yes i am one whats ur point?

I believe he was calling you a nob, as in cock, my confused friend!

**Corkscrewed** · 12-12-2003, 04:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ricky

LMAO WTF are you talking about?

a "nob" has got nothing to do with being a "noob", you thick bastard.

LOL

Psst!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ricky

Shut the **** up.

Paranoid Rattlesnake, you're not allowed to use the same arguments as me. As you say, that's a double standard, but **** you.

splay, you're just a nob
(hopefully your offended. I put a lot of thought into that)

Oh! I get it. He was TRYING to say "nob."

Thus concludes my pointless post. Aren't you proud of me?

**Nowhere Man** · 12-12-2003, 10:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ricky

Shut the fuck up.

Paranoid Rattlesnake, you're not allowed to use the same arguments as me. As you say, that's a double standard, but fuck you.

splay, you're just a nob
(hopefully your offended. I put a lot of thought into that)

Ah, profanity, the trusty standby of those who can't come up with real insults.

**Rock Bottom** · 02-28-2004, 03:38 PM

Nice one Corky. You even got the online 'freestyle' in there (or, Eminem c/p to the rest of us). StoneCold, I thought Corky was exaggerating at first, but god damn. LoL.

12-09-2003, 04:14 AM	#1
Corkscrewed Posts: 18,357	the STUPID NOOB faction spoof Shameless, Thick, and Unskilled Posters with Intelligence Deficiencies Nationally Organized Order and Brotherhood The setting is in an abandoned warehouse in the dumps someplace. In this trashy setting, many people incredibly lacking in that think known as common sense gather. StoneColdStunners: steps up to podium Okay I now call to order the first meeting of the Shameless, Thick, and Unskilled Posters with Intelligence Deficiencies Nationally Organized Order and Brotherhood, or STUPID NOOB. Its nice to see everyone made it I want to welcome you and stone cold rules and I love him but I see we have some new people here so lets introduce ourselves Beerondope: hi i'm beerondope I think wrestling gay you but okay wheres ric flair StoneColdStunners: Um... okay. Welcome to my FACTION. We're gonna go murder JR and wrestle him because I love HGA but I typo. J.R.s a closeted HLAlover: Kill JR? Hell yeah! I ***ing hate JR! He's nothing but a homo! He should be burned and I'll eat his testicles. He's stupid and imbecile and he has a huge boner for Austin cuz he orgasms everytime steve comes to the ring!!! StoneColdStunners: So do I. Everythingfan13: I orgasm when I see Shane. He's sooo cute! I love him! sighs* He's my favorite wrestler in the whole world! UndesputedWorldChampion: My Survivor Series PPV A-Train: Hi, I'm A-Train and I love to hump A-Train. He's so furry and rough in the sack, and I suck his hard cock every day. Yum Yum. StoneColdStunners: Um. I think you're banned. Go away. Wrestling god: Backstage officials are currently high on John Cena. Even though he lost his match with Benoit, the current plan is for him to feud with the Big Show and win the U.S. Title, then ease him into the main event scene after Benoit finishes his feud with Lesnar. Sushi-Z: John Cena sucks. UndesputedWorldChampion: Lesnar beat Goldberg using his submission finisher last month will Goldberg get even or is Brock the next Big Thing find out tonight! MAdoubleT: You know who sucks? Goldberg. HE IS A DISGRACE TO THE SPORT!!! He is a terrible champion and he makes the title a JOKE! He knows only three **ing moves and he's stupid and gay!!! I hate Goldberg!!! SMA467: You know who's gay? Rey Mysterio. He doesn't deserve a DVD RVDFAN1: Oh my gosh! Did you say RVD? He's so awesome! Hes the best wrestlers in the world because hes cool I want to be just like him because he is my idol I love robvan dam UndesputedWorldChampion: Rodney Mack vs mark henry Winner: henry Mack fought hard but Henry was too big and he hit him with his finisher and won and teddy long said Henry was the best wrestler ever belee dat playa! SMA467: I said "DVD" you idiot TAKERFAN1: Don't mess with my little brother! I'll have my XTREME CHAMPIONSHIP WRESTLING kill you! We're gonna take some flaming barbed wire 2x4's and nail your head to a shed! Don't you pick on my brother! ShannonFan: That sounds hardcore! Would you like to join the fed I'm opening up? We're going to have a hardcore taped fist triple ladder in a hell in the cell flaming tables chainsaw juggling rabid guard dog electric dildo on a pole match for the championship!!! TAKERFAN1: UndesputedWorldChampion: Bckstage vince is making out with Sable and then Dawn marie comes and says she and heyman want to join so then Vince says okay and says they'll go to the Hilton, and then Paris Hilton comes on and says she'll tape it and they're like okay because she's hot. Bizzle: I've created an official petition because I don't want Austin back. I hate him. Sign my petition. StoneColdStunners: What the hell? Austin is the best ever how can you not like austing becase he's the man and I htate you!!! Wrestling god: Billy Gunn injured his groin and is out three months. Billy Kidman will be back in time for Royal Rumble. Edge is expected to feud with Rhyno when he comes back, claiming that it was Rhyno to took him out. Joerapp: yo yo yo, it's joe rapp in the house and I'm gonna kick it freestyle. StoneColdStunners, you're a ing idiot. I'm gonna ing kill your ass, dawg, you don't know nothing. I sit back with this pack of Zig Zags and this bag of this weed it gives me the shit needed to be the most meanest MC on this -- on this Earth And since birth I've been cursed with this curse to just curse And just blurt this berserk and bizarre shit that works And it sells and it helps in itself to relieve all this tension dispensin these sentences Gettin this stress that's been eatin me recently off of this chest and I rest again peacefully (peacefully).. but at least have the decency in you to leave me alone, when you freaks see me out in the streets when I'm eatin or feedin my daughter to not come and speak to me (speak to me).. I don't know you and no, I don't owe you a mo-ther-in thing I'm not Mr. N'Sync, I'm not what your friends think I'm not Mr. Friendly, I can be a prick if you tempt me my tank is on empty (is on empty).. No patience is in me and if you offend me I'm liftin you 10 feet (liftin you 10 feet).. in the air I don't care who is there and who saw me destroy you Go call you a lawyer, file you a lawsuit I'll smile in the courtroom and buy you a wardrobe I'm tired of all you (of all you).. I don't mean to be mean but that's all I can be is just me SPD10000: Should Eminem battle John Cena at Wrestlemania? SPD10000: Should Hulk Hogan come back? SPD10000: Should Scott Hall come back? SPD10000: Should X-Pac come back? SPD10000: Should Psycho Sid come back? SPD10000: Should Kevin Nash come back? MAdoubleT: Shut the up, you annoying prick! None of them should come back, and for that matter, neither should Goldberg. He should lose the title to someone. Anyone. Even RVD. I don't care. That man is a ing disgrace to the ing sport! Anyone who disagrees with me is a ing prick, because I'm the ing man, and even though I don't ing have any ing legitimate argument, and even though others ing have proven me wrong, they're ing gay ass queers because I'm *ing right. at that moment, a middle-aged mother enters the room* Mother: Matt? Am I hearing that language from you again? It thought we discussed this, young man. You're grounded. And I'm taking you back home from this filthy trash hole. How can you even come here? MAdoubleT: What the **, mom? How can you do this? You can't ing do this. This is ing shit stupid. , you can't ing ground me, mom! It's not ing fair! I'm right! You can't ing do this!!! Mother: I've told you this before. If I hear that language again, I'm destroying your computer. Now, GET IN THE CAR!!!! MAdoubleT: Yes mommy. UndesputedWorldChampion: Eddie Guerrero vs Chavo Guerrero (Street Fight) Winner: Eddie Guerrero Chavo almost hurt Eddie, but Eddie didn't want ot fight chavo cuz he's his nephew, but chavo wanted to and he fought hard but eddie cheated with the trash can and hit his finishering move and pinn chavo Wrestling god: The current plan is to have Lance Storm continue his "Ladies Man" gimmick. He will eventually feud with Christian after Jericho turns face and feuds with Christian. StoneColdStunners: Do you ever give sources? Stop stealing! Mikey The Man: Yeah! I'm the original plagiarizer, and only I can do that! Wrestling god: I always get it from PWS you pussy! Mikey The Man: ** you!!! the two get into a fight and roll out into the alley, punching, kicking, and groping StoneColdStunners: Yeah. Well, now we have to vote for our official diva because they're hot but we have to choose one who's super hot, like Austin is hot, but he's a guy and not a diva. Amity McMachon: I want my Stephanie!!!! null[/LIST][LIST] MMMM...BEEFY: Oh, do you have nude pics of any of the divas? I love them. Trish is so hot, I wish I could see her naked. I'd touch the picture of her breasts. Bischoff2K: I'd touch Tony Schiavonne��s breasts. He's the best announcer in the world. Genetic Freak: What the **ing hell are you ing talking about, you er! You're a ing idiotic shitbag, bitch! Besides, the real travesty is Scott ing Steiner, the Genetic Freak! I ing can��t ing believe he's ing being ing treated like a ing pussy, ing feuding with ing no one and with that ** Test. He's much ing better than that! If you ing think Steiner sucks, you ing suck. Everyone else ing sucks. Austin's a er. Triple H ing should die. you all!!! Bischoff2K: See, you're stupid. Why do you always complain? Why can't you really just enjoy the show? Instead, you complain about every little thing. Why can't you be like me? I'm better than you because I enjoy thinks. Genetic Freak: What the ? Who the ing shit are you? You ing pussy! You ing want to ing enjoy shit? Enjoy this *er!!! Genetic Freak punches out Bischoff2K, then stomps out muttering how the WWE should give Steiner the World Title*

12-10-2003, 01:41 PM	#14
loopydate FIT Challenge Slag People Posts: 13,816	Isn't Dutch the closest language grammar-wise to English? I seem to remember that from the linguistics class I took junior year. They both stem from the same root language (proto-Germanic, if I'm not mistaken), so have very similar cadence and punctuation. That said, shouldn't it be EASIER for someone who's Dutch to do this than someone from another country? Also, speaking of ethnicities, that's an excuse. I'm part German, but you don't see me putting out illegible posts. Last edited by loopydate; 12-11-2003 at 12:25 AM. Reason: I done forgots me a word!

02-29-2004, 12:05 AM	#30
Shaggy Yipee Kai Yay!!! Posts: 5,705	That is some funny stuff right there (runs knowing hes probably the next up for this list) EDGE OWNS ALL KNEEL BEFORE ZOD!!!!

12-09-2003, 04:15 AM	#2
Corkscrewed Posts: 18,357	UndesputedWorldChampion: Backstage, we see Sable, Dawn Marie, Heyman, and Vince in a fourway, and then Torrie walks in and she's shocked, but the four say join us and she does. Then Mr. Ass comes in and strips and everyone has a party. Red neck wrassler fan: I challenge you undesputedchampion!!!! Ilt_undertaker: You know what? I think if you challenged the Undertaker, you'd lose because he��s the best wrestler ever! I love him! Everythingfan13: Shane is hotter. I'd blow him if I could. LOVE!!!! Ilt_undertaker: I can't get a job. My parents won't let me. Everythingfan13: What's that have to do with anything? turns Oh Shane! My lover! My idol! My one and only true one! I must have you!!! Ilt_undertaker: Wow, this is too weird even for me. I'm outta here. GeorgeCarlin: Vince Lambado's doing an awesome job right now MMMM...BEEFY: Does anyone have any nude pics of Britney Spears? I could lick her. UndesputedWorldChampion: Kane vs Goldberg Winner and still champion: Kane Goldberg was angry and speared kane but Kane sat up so Goldberg did it again but Kane didn't die so he speare d him three times but Kane didn't get pinned so then Kane gave Goldberg the chokeslammed but he kickedout and then goldbert try to jackhammer Kane but kane reersed it and hit his finisher an dpinned Goldberg When he won, undertaker suddenly ran out and beat the crap out of kane and then the lights went out and whenthey came back on, no one was there. They disappeared!!! WRAITH: Hey guys! Isn't it about time that Giant Gonzales comes back? StoneColdStunners: No. The Sensei of Mattitude: You know what? Version ONE should stay on SD! He's awesome and he's the best bad guy. I know everything. MMMM...BEEFY: Hardy sucks. So do Benoit, Angle, and Cena. You know who rules? Atrain, Big Show, Orlando Jones, Nathan Jones, and Steiner. They rule!!! WRAITH: Isn't it about time that Nathan Jones and Orlando Jones should form a tag team called THE JONES and win the titles? UnleashedF5P.I.M.PG-Unit: The Master of the F-5 is here to break it down, folks! What the guy above me said is totally stupid. Brock Lesnar is a MONSTER and would beat them both by himself. And you know, I know the F-5 hurts, and he'd wreck HAVOC on people because I would F-5 them to hell!!! Beerondope: you more stoned dan Iam Red neck rassler fan: itstue I make more since than you do and I have no grammer skills atlal I challenge you, Undesputechamp!!!!!! WorldUndesputedChampion: Triple is backstage and he is gonna fight Orton and Ric Flair says watch out beause new evolution is going to be after him and triple H says he's the game. Doctor_Gonzo: Hey guys!!!! According to MY EXCLUSIVE SOURCE, Mark Henry recently ATE The Hurricane. He reported his stomach was like a storm. When he pooped Hurricane out, he said WASSUP WIDDAT??? Bret Hart recently ate one more grape than he planned. Our condolences go out to the Hart family. Jericho will have a baby with Trish Stratus. This baby will feud with Stephanie's baby in the first ever HARDCORE DIAPER ON A POLE MATCH!!! J.R.s a closeted HLAlover: What the name of the next WWE PPV? MMMM...BEEFY: Does anyone have naked pictures of Christina Aguilera? I'm feeling dirty. J.R.s a closeted HLAlover: Who was the IC champion the longest in 2000? The Sensai of Mattitude: Matt Hardy should be the new IC champion. He's the best guy ever man!!! Genetic Freak stomps back in Genetic Freak: Shut the ** up! You're a ing moron! Steiner should ing be the ing awesome ass IC champ, you nut! He should have all the ing belts. And he's ing sexy in his purple thong! If you disagree with me, *you!!!! punches outSensai of Mattitude and stalks back out* Doctor_Gonzo: According to MY EXCLUSIVE SOURCE, J.R.s a closeted HLAlover recently gave a blow job to JR and will be out 3-4 weeks due to BBQ sauce poisoning. Also, UnleashedF5P.I.M.PG-Unit knocked himself out when he F-5'ed himself while showering. Bret Hart woke up five minutes late today. Our condolences go out to the Hart family. Triple H recently sprained his penis going to hard in the missionary position with Stephanie. He is expected to miss 2 weeks of TV and 3 weeks in bed. StoneColdStunners: Okay, okay! Lets have some order here! Okay, to those of you who are left, what shall we do? UndesputedWorldChampion: Vince comes out in his boxers and says he's really happy, so he's gonna make a new match and it's funaki vs Paul London for the WWE champ, and Brock Lesnar is no longer champ now. Lesnar comes out and is mad so he hits the fnisher on Vince and then he takes a chair and beats the crap out of London and Funaki who comeout. Then spanky comes out and bites Lesnar and then pinshim to be new champion. WRAITH: Isn't it about time Ultimate Warrior came back with his streamers and crazy music? Red neck rassler fan: I still waitng for challenge undisputed champ I'm gonna kick your ass you sucka!!! Sushi-Z: Hey, he's dead. It's not going to happen. UndesputedWorldChampion: No I'm not. I said I was sorry. Red neck rassler fan: Whoa, he's dead? UndesputedWorldChampion: No! I'm right here. Sushi-Z: Yeah. Died of leukemia. His dad told us so too. UndesputedWorldChampion: I'm right here guys. Red neck rassler fan: Whoa. Damn. Well, I have no reason to be here. UndesputedWorldChampion: I'm not dead! Collecter of the dead: He says he's not dead. Sushi-Z: to collector He will be in a moment. to Red neck Yeah, no reason, really. Poor guy died of leukemia, so there's no challenge now. UndesputedWorldChampion: Hello? Can't you hear me? Red neck rassler fan: Oh. Well I��m out now then. Cya StoneColdStunners: Hello? Guys? Is there even anyone here at all? LOUIEANDERSON: Hi everyone! I��m Louie Anderson! You might remember me from being the former host of Family Feud and I had that show on FOX. You know, I'm really a big wrestling fan, and I've come here to share my great opinions. Yup, you're in the presence of a star!!! StoneColdStunners: Shit. This ain��t worth it. I'll go kill JR and wrestle him by myself. Cya LOUIE. LOUIEANDERSON: So really, I'm Louie Anderson. I'm not lying either, and don't call me an ass either. I've come to usher in a new rev-- Hello...? ===================== Okay, so it's kinda late, so that spoof might have sucked. Anyway, I had some time and decided to write this as a followup... a sort of sequel (with no actual storyline relation) to another old spoof that I did when I was The Captioneer. Anyway, this was inspired the recent influx of stupid n00bs. I browsed the forums over the past year, but I might have missed some really stupid people. If I did, I��m sorry. Thanks to Dude Love for helping me a bit with a list of idiots. Unfortunately, I lost that list, so I'm not sure if I got some of his suggestions. Some of these people (well, two) are from a while ago too. Like A-Train and LOUIEANDERSON. Old spoof I did: http://www.tpww.net/cgi-bin/ultimate...c&f=1&t=013147 ===================== Thanks for reading!

12-09-2003, 07:42 AM	#4
Rammsteinmad TPWW's #3 Peep Posts: 20,903	lol, good stuff. (Do we all get our old post counts back? I was at about 4500... )

12-09-2003, 07:48 AM	#6
Disturbed316 Posts: 22,695	Its as if they we actually saying it

12-09-2003, 02:15 PM	#7
Hired Hitman The Next Great One н� Posts: 18,684

12-09-2003, 02:26 PM	#8
StoneColdStunner Posts: 100	uhuh...well its very funny men...you did forgett about yourself, but it was all nice and stuff because this is also a waist of Thread...and i got another comment: my native language ain't English...it's Dutch...you know Corkey- Holland...well won't suprise me that you did not no where it is...( it think this country sucks...Holland that is AMERICA Rules). But that's another story...well liked this thread and from now on i will not wright any boring Threads...i promise (sorry for this boring thread reply) P.S. You still love me right?

12-10-2003, 05:31 PM	#16
Splaya 1-0 TPWW Chess Master Posts: 17,211	I'm just staying out of this one

12-10-2003, 06:12 PM	#21
Sickboy Self-pity is my hobby... Posts: 3,423	This one is still funny!

12-10-2003, 09:21 PM	#23
ilt_undertaker Sexy Posts: 5,443	I feel famous! But seriously, i thought the "spoof" was really funny

12-10-2003, 11:31 PM	#24
Popojiju Popo's-R-Us Posts: 368	I love it LOL, this was great. Glad my name wasn't in this. Hahaha! :thumbsup

12-11-2003, 04:29 PM	#25
Corkscrewed Posts: 18,357	haha. "nob"

02-28-2004, 11:06 AM	#26
Showstopper Kevin Nash's Only Fan Posts: 63	Actually, I used to know TAKERFAN1 and RVDFAN1.

02-28-2004, 11:52 PM	#27
Corkscrewed Posts: 18,357	Damn. THAT was a bumped thread. And not by DX Fantic either! (not that I mind this time )

02-28-2004, 11:54 PM	#28
Boondock Saint Posts: 8,795	Haha, way to bump. wtf

02-29-2004, 12:02 AM	#29
Corkscrewed Posts: 18,357	If you'll notice... it was Showstopper who bumped it. If you were talking to him and not me, you never read this.

02-29-2004, 12:19 AM	#31
Boondock Saint Posts: 8,795	Showstopper I know you bumped this. To clarify things, you are the one who bumped this. Nobody else did.

02-28-2004, 03:38 PM	#39
Rock Bottom Ball So Hard University Posts: 8,450	Nice one Corky. You even got the online 'freestyle' in there (or, Eminem c/p to the rest of us). StoneCold, I thought Corky was exaggerating at first, but god damn. LoL.