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Old 05-14-2008, 03:05 AM   #1
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Tovo's weekly "WTF TNA!?!?"
So, since I'm not watching WWE anymore, basically I can only talk TNA with you good people. But since TNA is really nothing more than a giant ball of frozen shit on the hot dry day that is the wrestling landscape, I'm forced cool my wrestling palate with it. Still, it seems that every week I'm left with a resounding echo in the back of my head, not so much a whisper as it is a shouting "WHAT THE FUCK!?"

There are any number of things I could start out with. I mean this is a company chalked full of worthy things to bitch about, but for the first in this weekly event I'm going to focus on TNA announcing the results of their own shows. Sometimes it's big, sometimes it's not. But there are times where someone who's deaf, blind, and slightly retarded could still see the outcome from a mile away.

This is something that really pissed me off about Lockdown. Samoa Joe vs. Kurt Angle for the Title. OK, so it's one thing to have a career vs. title match, 99% of the time, someone new is holding gold. But with how much they drove that home, they might as well have simply said "Watch Lockdown! Samoa Joe will win the belt!" When they first announced it I more or less knew, we all did, but then they harped on it further the next week with him saying even it wasn't about getting the win, if he wasn't champ he would leave. OK, so DQ or Dusty finishes are out of the question. And then it was he would never wrestle, anywhere, ever. Now that's when I just went, WTF! There were some baseless internet rumors that Joe was not happy with the new TNA contract and he might not sign, which then opened the door for if he would go back to RoH or jump up to WWE. Now, the margin of people who knew that was VERY small, and it wasn't true, but that's like 50 smarkish marks who could have possibly convinced themselves that maybe, just MAYBE Joe would lose...until they say he wouldn't wrestle anywhere.

Now let's look at the build up to Sacrifice; Awesome Kong is announced as one of the Egotistical 8 - show goes off the air. Begin rolling for TNA Today online exclusive stuff, BG says it's crazy she's in the tourny, but he hopes she is his partner. Then the next week he cuts another promo saying that they only person who he'd like to team with is Kong. Come PPV; *SWERVE!* It's Kong. Oh wait, no, that's not a swerve, that's a fucking bus of obvious hitting you in the face. And while we're on the topic of the tournament, I harped on this in another thread...but LAX was doing NOTHING. Then suddenly they win to qualify to get in the tournament. Then for reasons still beyond comprehension they bring Hector Guerrero up from the Spanish booth and say they want to mootch off the name "Guerrero" on their way to winning the belts. Then, as if summoning the dead spirit of Eddie wasn't enough of a "we get it" point, they are the ONLY team out of 8 to get a hype video on the Impact before the PPV. Nah, they wouldn't be that fucking obvious about it? Yeah, they would.

I know it's hard to fool people all the time, because after a while we've seen it all and know what to expect. But still, there are times when TNA's booking is so obvious that I'm almost expecting them to do the opposite, if for no other reason than the only possible justification of the hype they do is for an occasional "OMG" moment. I think the last time TNA did ANYTHING that made me sit up and say "I didn't see that coming" was back in 2007 when Christian Cage jobbed out to Kaz.

So there you have it.

TNA, WHAT THE FUCK is up with over obvious booking?

Quote:
Originally Posted by What Would Kevin Do? View Post
I would have no problem with HBK getting a farewell run with the title before he retires.

With that said though, there is no belt in the industry that HBK could win that would add to his career. HBK's career is built around him being HBK, not winning a bunch of titles.
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Old 05-14-2008, 03:13 AM   #2
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Nobody has any imagination.
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Old 05-14-2008, 06:06 AM   #3
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I'd rather watch TNA than read that
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Old 05-14-2008, 06:09 AM   #4
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We understand TNA sucks, no need to remind us of this!
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Old 05-14-2008, 01:26 PM   #5
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Russo has so often worked on the swerve, often for no reason other than to swerve.

Now he's trying the opposite?

I dunno, I don't watch TNA. If wanted to kill brain cells, I'd watch "A Shot at Love II with Tila Tequila."
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Old 05-14-2008, 02:22 PM   #6
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I'd rather watch TNA than read that
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Old 05-14-2008, 02:28 PM   #7
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TNA is retarded, we already have been over this.
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Old 05-14-2008, 02:37 PM   #8
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ToVo's pretty retarded himself; could be the reason for the confusion.
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Old 05-14-2008, 03:27 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kane Knight View Post
ToVo's pretty retarded himself; could be the reason for the confusion.
I was about to get defensive about this, but between cleaning the drool off of myself I kept getting distracted by shinny objects so I doubt I'll come up with a comeback.
Last edited by The One; 05-14-2008 at 03:36 PM.
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Old 05-14-2008, 05:00 PM   #10
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OMG it's an internet swerve!!

TNA are still shit but now we can not discuss it, guys keep me up to date on these things, please. I don't want to make the same mistake that The One has done
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Old 05-14-2008, 05:26 PM   #11
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It's not that we can't discuss it, just its been done to death.
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Old 05-14-2008, 07:19 PM   #12
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No, Mackem's right. I've already released the TPWW gestapo, who will flog him and ToVo silly and then sodomise them with bricks in a secret prison....
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Old 05-15-2008, 06:26 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kane Knight View Post
No, Mackem's right. I've already released the TPWW gestapo, who will flog him and ToVo silly and then sodomise them with bricks in a secret prison....
Unbelievable.

I don't know how you could turn a wonderful place such as a secret prison and turn it into a sordid situation.
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Old 05-14-2008, 07:58 PM   #14
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I'm starting to think its me that's stupid because I like TNA...

Oh great that's reason enough to have be classified as mentally disabled.
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Old 05-14-2008, 08:41 PM   #15
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TNA is not all bad, Show Off. I'm actually preferring it to the WWE right now, mainly because TNA is a somewhat fresher brand of shit.

BG James and Awesome Kong teaming is nowhere near as bad as you make it sound, Tovo. But TNA putting the Tag Team Titles on The LAX, even though many smarks wanted it, was a stupid move at this stage of the game. If they wanted the belts on LAX, they could have just moved it onto them straight away (they were in the fucking match that caused this debacle). If they wanted to work in the Hector Guerrero angle (hasn't he really done something with The LAX?), they really should have built it better.
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Old 05-15-2008, 06:16 AM   #16
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mainly because TNA is a somewhat fresher brand of shit.
.
That's the only reason anyone likes watching it imo.
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Old 05-14-2008, 08:48 PM   #17
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Noid, if you notice, I didn't complain that they teamed together, I complained because BG spent 2 out of 3 weeks talking about how he would want to team with her, and then they "randomly" ended up together. Put them together long term for all I care, but don't spend weeks building up to it and try and convince people that it's not pre-planned.
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Old 05-14-2008, 09:25 PM   #18
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Maybe they are building up to something really obvious like them never beating WWE and we will think because they are always so obvious this will never happen. Then one day they will and it will be a swerve because they are always so obvious.









Obvious.
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Old 05-15-2008, 12:59 AM   #19
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TNA sucks, plain and simple, when you have Shark Boy hitting the Chummer someone should die
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Old 05-15-2008, 01:00 AM   #20
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"and thats the fishin line" GOD I WANT TO DIE
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Old 05-15-2008, 02:08 PM   #21
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I can't believe that TNA has latched onto Eddiesploitation...
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Old 05-15-2008, 02:09 PM   #22
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Vastardikai gets Vastardikai'd?
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I can't believe it's not butter...
I just read what I posted, and I had to...
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