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Old 09-29-2009, 06:23 PM   #1
CWK
 
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The best un-known jobs in TNA Wrestling
These are some jobs that are out there in TNA Wrestling that few know about....

1. Samoa Joe's Black Head Towel Washer.

2. Delivery Person of Kurt Angle's Fake Rose He Wears on His Suit.

3. Delivery Person of Sting's Face Paint (Note: This is a high turn over position as you see on TV there are weeks that Sting wears no face paint, meaning the person delivering it has quit or stole the paint)

4. Men's Room Attendant for the Main Event Mafia (Note: This entails assisting them to the Toilet stalls, keeping the super poly-grip stocked, as well as the just-for-men facial hair and head hair dye stocked as well.)

5. Kurt Angle's Head Shaver

6. Matt Morgan's hair collector (Note: You will have to follow Matt Morgan around and pick up the hair as it falls off of his head).

7. Scott Steiner's entrance theme facilitator (Note: You will drive a police cruiser up to the impact zone and turn on your sirens when he is about to come out).

8. A.J. Styles entrance theme vocalist (Note: You will simply listen to the instruments and repeatedly say "I am, I am". Just follow the prompts).

9. Technological Gimmick Selector (Note: You simply sit at a computer and every 2-3 minutes when TNA signs a new wrestler, you type in the word "The" into the computer, hit the "Match" button, and then select a name for the wrestler, i.e. The boss, The monster, the phenominal, the outlaw, the icon, the pope, the guru, the blueprint, the samoan submission machine, etc.)

10. Orchestra conductor for "The Monster" Abyss (Note: This requires you to wear a tux, put on a long haired wig, get very red in the face, sweat alot, and violently conduct Abyss' theme song by thrashing around as he makes his entrance *** highly physically demanding position ***).

11. Creative writer for Rhino (Note: This is a limited seasonal position requiring you to only work 2-3 weeks every 4 to 5 months when Rhino is used).

12. People to bow at ringside (We are looking for 3 to 4 motivated people with strong backs to bow continuously at ringside during Sting's entrance).

13. Oxygen reducer (This position requires someone with a creative mind to come up with ways to eliminate any and all oxygen getting into Suicide's costume. He's trying to kill himself, hence the name).

14. Kidnapper (Someone ballsy enough to grab Velvet Sky and take her to my house, gawd!)

Anyone got any other jobs they know of in TNA Wrestling?
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Old 09-29-2009, 06:24 PM   #2
Nark Order
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god fucking damnit
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Old 09-29-2009, 06:24 PM   #3
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Eh...
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Old 09-29-2009, 06:28 PM   #4
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I am just trying to help in these tough economic times, the unemployment rate is like 10% you know.

pffffff puh pfffff pfffff
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Old 09-29-2009, 06:29 PM   #5
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pffffff puh pfffff pfffff
Did you just hyperventilate while typing?
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Old 09-29-2009, 06:35 PM   #6
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that would be known as typerventilating, had it for years. I am calm myself down by jamming my face in the printer and breathing slowly
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Old 09-29-2009, 08:31 PM   #7
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(although 'typerventilating' was quite amusing)
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Old 09-29-2009, 08:34 PM   #8
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KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)
Hey all of those some of those a couple of those one of those was funny.
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Old 09-29-2009, 08:35 PM   #9
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Quote:
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Hey all of those some of those a couple of those one of those was funny.
At least I got one chuckle out of this thread.

This post was it.
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Old 09-29-2009, 08:45 PM   #10
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KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)
The thread had no chance to begin with.

It had 'TNA' in the title.
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Old 09-29-2009, 08:51 PM   #11
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Now, if it had "Time Machine" in the title, it would be 4 pages by now.

Mainly because people would use their time machines and post rapidly.
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Old 09-29-2009, 08:55 PM   #12
KYR
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KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)
I'm still trying to find one of these...
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Old 09-29-2009, 08:56 PM   #13
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http://cgi.ebay.com/Back-to-the-Futu...d=p3286.c0.m14
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Old 09-29-2009, 09:24 PM   #14
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Quote:
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The thread had no chance to begin with.

It had 'TNA' in the title.
Sorry but that's not fair. I like TNA. This thread just sucks.
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Old 09-29-2009, 09:29 PM   #15
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You'd think they would just record their wrestlers' theme songs and play the tape instead of playing them live each time.
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Old 10-01-2009, 09:15 AM   #16
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I agree about Suicide's costume seeming to be ridiculously unsafe though
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Old 10-01-2009, 11:09 AM   #17
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15. the guy that oils up the beautiful people before each show
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Old 10-01-2009, 01:45 PM   #18
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15. the guy that oils up the beautiful people before each show
Where the hell do I sign up?
Last edited by Sixx; 10-01-2009 at 01:48 PM.
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Old 10-01-2009, 01:46 PM   #19
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Quote:
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15. the guy that oils up the beautiful people before each show
That's not an unknown job, there's a five-mile line outside the Impact Zone for it.
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Old 10-01-2009, 02:17 PM   #20
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Am I the only one who thinks 'The Blueprint' sounds like a cool nickname for a wrestler? Is it being used already?
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Old 10-01-2009, 02:38 PM   #21
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Quote:
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11. Creative writer for Rhino (Note: This is a limited seasonal position requiring you to only work 2-3 weeks every 4 to 5 months when Rhino is used).
This is the only one that doesn't convince me the author is 8 years old.
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Old 10-01-2009, 02:50 PM   #22
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Quote:
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Am I the only one who thinks 'The Blueprint' sounds like a cool nickname for a wrestler? Is it being used already?
"The Blueprint" Matt Morgan I do believe.
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Old 10-01-2009, 02:55 PM   #23
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Technically the best unknown job in TNA would be Vince Russo's. I haven't got a clue what the fuck he's doing, done or is going to do in wrestling that makes people want to pay him.
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Old 10-01-2009, 07:16 PM   #24
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KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)KYR got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)
Quote:
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Technically the best unknown job in TNA would be mine. I haven't got a clue what the fuck I'm doing, done or am going to do in wrestling that makes people want to pay me.
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Old 10-02-2009, 11:31 PM   #25
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Request CWK's name be changed to "Jay Leno Except Not As Funny".
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Old 10-03-2009, 03:45 AM   #26
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Request CWK's name be changed to "Jay Leno Except Not As Funny".
Hey I was just trying to have some fun lol.

On a serious note, do you think you could work out the Velvet Sky job?

Guuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhddddddddd
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