This might be the lack of sleep talking but I think this would draw huge money...

**M-A-G** · 03-05-2005, 01:46 PM

So, yeah, the following is based on my friend's decision while playing EWR to give Ric Flair the "Super Villain" gimmick, which debuted to a positive response, mind you. If you don't know what EWR is, get your lazy ass over to the website and download it! Anyways, the setting is Raw after WrestleMania, Batista fresh off a World Heavyweight Title victory over Triple H, the former champ in one of his usual post-PPV loss moods, and Eric Bischoff ordering a No DQ rematch for the title that night. Begin scene....

***Triple H and Ric Flair are in their dressing room. Triple H is pacing back and forth, furious, psyching himself up. Naitch has just finished watching The Hurricane job to Muhammad Hassan on the monitor and addresses the former champion***

Flair: Hunter, look at that. I can't believe it. A fellow North Carolina native getting his ass handed to him. I tried talking to that kid but it's like nothing gets through to him.

***Triple H doesn't stop pacing. His breaths are getting louder and more furious***

Flair: Hey, hey, champ, champ. What's the matter? You're not that worried about the match tonight are you?

***Triple H stops his pacing and faces Flair, not looking anywhere else but into his eyes. The furious look on The Game's face does not change***

Flair: Hunter come on. Last night was just a mishap. A minor stumble. We all know who the real man is. Hell, even Bischoff knows it! That's why he picked you to be the first to get a shot at Batista. You are Triple H! The greatest wrestler ALIVE TODAY!!! You've turned away all the challenges that have been in your way since you've been here on Raw. The Jeff Hardys, the RVDs, the Booker Ts, The Scott Steiners, the HBKs! You've even beaten the man, himself, right in front of you! Batista is just like all the others. You've got nothing to worry about, that title is coming back, right back to this waist right here.

HHH (after a brief pause): You'd better make sure that happens.

***HHH glares at Ric for a while before leaving the dressing room. Ric appears nervous***

***Meanwhile, Hurricane is made aware of Ric Flair's comments about his performance earlier. He's not too happy.***

***The main event then begins as scheduled. The No DQ stipulation is emphasized by the ring announcer as Jim Ross and The King warn the viewers that it's the carte blanche that HHH needs to beat Batista. The action is intense as HHH tries vainly to overpower Batista. He even tries an early attempt at a sledgehammer shot but it's taken away by Batista and promptly tossed. "I don't need any weapons!" the champion declares confidentally. Fast forward to the ending as Batista is poised to deliver his Demon Bomb. Ric Flair, upon orders from earlier, promptly runs in to low blow the champion and save HHH. He brings in the World Heavyweight belt to give to HHH who is recovering somewhat and instructs him to use it. Batista has balls of steel however and lunges at HHH with his incapacitating clothesline. The challenger ducks, though, and Flair ends up being knocked goofy with the clothesline. HHH takes a swing with the belt but Batista ducks it. Kick, wham, Demon Bomb...1,2,3. Batista celebrates his successful defense while flair is attended to.***

***The next week, HHH reveals he's torn about his feeling towards Ric Flair as he feels he cost him the title but reports that Flair hasn't been feeling too well thanks to the clothesline from the previous week. He promises Flair will be back next week and that there will be hell to pay.***

***Two weeks after getting knocked goofy with Batista's clothesline, Flair is reportedly in the dressing room reserved for him and Triple H. Upon hearing this, Triple H immediately makes a beeline for the private room, ready to rip his mentor and idol a new one. He's still fuming and things look to explode once HHH opens that door.

However, HHH only manages to get a "Ric, y...." out of his mouth before noticing that Flair is not in his traditional attire. HHH is frozen in place with his mouth open. He cannot believe the site before him. For Ric Flair is adorned in a tight black leather outfit with a dark blue trim. Around his neck is a cape patterned after his legendary robes. Around his eyes a blue mask. It's evident that he's been waiting for Triple H as he's standing straight with his hands at his hips, eyes locked on the Game. HHH has not yet fully comprehended what he's looking at.***

Flair (in an unusual, swarmy, bold voice): Aha, you're finally here, my boy! I was losing precious time while awaiting your arrival. Time is a very valuable commodity in my headquarters. I trust you have located all the proper materials for my plan?

HHH:

Flair: You know...THE PLAN?!?!

HHH:

Flair (exasperated): My goodness, do I have to do everything around here? A man can't find good help these days.

HHH (bewildered and taken back): 'Good help'? Naitch, what are you talking about? What are you doing in....

Flair: Woah, woah, woah....It's...*Flair turns around to show what's on his cape*...DOCTOR Naitch!!!

HHH:

Flair, I don't have time for this...this...whatever the hell this is. I'm trying to get the World.....

Flair: THE WORLD!!! Yes, the world is what we're after. But we must act quickly! Should our plans leak out to The Hurricane and that overweight sidekick of his, we might not get another chance at glory!!!

HHH: You're worried about The Hurricane and Rosey?!?! I can take on those goofs myself! Just two weeks ago you....

Flair: MY GOD, MAN! What are you insane?!?! You'd be torn to bits! That flying green freak has toppled some of the mightiest individuals alive. He's been after me for a while so we'd better get while the getting's good. Off to the Naitch Dome!

***Flair leaps off screen in a WHOOSH leaving Triple H alone and bewildered. Only confused mutterings are eminating from his mouth before he unleashes.***

HHH: What the hell just happened?!?!?!

***Next week, Flair opens up the show in the same attire as he was seen in the previous week. This time he's in the ring.***

Flair: Hurricane and Rosey! I know you've been monitoring my activities since I came back. But little do you know, I have assembled a device that will bring the world TO ITS KNEES!!! And not even YOU will be able to stop me this time! The world will bow to the might of Doctor Naitch and his empire! I understand this company is holding an event this Sunday called Backlash! I want you there, one-on-one, up close and personal so that you may witness its unveiling.

***HHH's music suddenly interrupts and the Game himself inevitably follows suit approaching the ring with a confused, yet angry look on his face. That countenance doesn't change as he enters the ring and takes a mic.***

HHH: What the hell are you doing? What the hell is this outfit you're wearing? You haven't been returning my calls. You took the limo last week forcing me to take a taxi. THE GAME DOESN'T RIDE TAXIS!!! Do you know how embarassing that was? And on top of that, I got a bunch of smartass, idiot fans walking up to me asking, "What's up with Flair?", "Where's your belt, champ?", "How come Naitch isn't with you?" And you don't seem to give to give a crap about all that! You're talking crazy about...whatever and claiming the world. I mean, first Orton, then Batista, and now you're leaving me high and dry? WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS?

Flair: Leaving you high and dry? What are you talking about? You're gonna be right at my side. The world will be ours for the taking this Sunday! I will defeat The Hurricane in combat, the device will be unleashed, and we will reap the rewards of my evil genius!

***HHH is getting more furious. The King alludes to HHH being the only one who should be credited for being an evil genius. HHH looks to offer a rebuttle when The Hurricane's music hits. Rosey and The Hurricane appear on the stage.***

Hurricane: Evil Doctor Naitch, we meet again! I've realized I cannot sit back for much longer while you attempt to disrupt the peace and tranquility of the world. We WILL have our encounter at Backlash and I WILL put a stop to your evil plans! But I say that this Sunday is too far away. Let us do combat, tonight! Rosey and myself issue a challenge to you and a partner of your choosing. What do you say, good doctor?

HHH:

Flair: You want a piece of this? You want to suffer your terrible fate so soon? YOU ARE ON!!! And to throw a monkey wrench into whatever ideas you might have, my partner will none other than my loyal sidekick right here, THE GAME! What do you think of that?

HHH (taken back by the 'sidekick' comment): I'll tell you what I think of that....

Flair: So it's on!!! We'll see you and your doom tonight! WHOOOOOOOOO!

***Rosey and Hurricane take their leave as Flair poses with an evil smile on his face with his music playing. HHH is frozen in shock and anger and bewilderment. Flair takes his leave leaving HHH behind still trying to appeal.***

***Later, backstage, HHH manages to catch up with Ric Flair. He questions the situation again.***

HHH: Naitch, Naitch! What the hell was that? Do you know how big of an idiot you looked out there? How big of an idiot I looked out there? I should be focusing on getting back my World Title and getting some straight answers out of you and now I'm stuck in some meaningless match tonight as YOUR sidekick....

Flair: Woah, woah, woah, my dear boy! It is not a meaningless encounter! It's a battle of wills! A battle of psychology! We're going to get into the Hurricane's head tonight! We're going to wear him down! So that when Backlash rolls around, he will be in NO CONDITION to stop me and my plans. Muahahaha!!! Muahaha!!!

HHH: WHAT?

Flair: Just relax, just relax. I got everything under control.

***Flair leaves again leaving HHH confused.***

***Later, the main event is slated to begin. HHH and Flair come out, separately, however. The music of the heros is played but only Hurricane comes out. Rosey is nowhere to be found. Flair takes the mic before the match can begin and address Hurricane.***

Flair (with an evil smile): Soooo, Mr. Hurricane! Seems, you've lost your sidekick. What's the matter? It's THAT hard to find someone that big? Now, we can go on with this but before we do I've got something to show you.

***Flair points to the TitanTron. Hurricane looks at the screen to see Rosey bound and gagged in what appears to be a trunk to a vehicle, possibly the limo of Evolution. Rosey is struggling to get free as Hurricane looks on in shock and worry.***

Flair: So now, Hurricane. You've got two choices. You can allow my good sidekick here to defeat you in combat and thus save your buddy. Or you shall feel the wrath of DOCTOR NAITCH!!! What's it gonna be?!?!?

***Hurricane looks nervously at the screen and his two opponents back and forth. Suddenly he rushes forward to take a shot at Flair but gets jumped from behind by HHH. The bell rings and Flair exits the ring as The Game takes over on Hurricane. Flair seems confident in Hunter to let him go at it alone as he remains on the apron not even attempting to tag in. The match appears to turn in favor of Hurricane as he gets in a low blow as the ref is distracted with Flair's shenanigans on the apron. Seeing HHH in peril, Flair goes under the ring to pull out what appears to be a scepter. Hurricane tries a chokeslam in the meantime but the Game counters into a DDT to lay him out. HHH sees Flair waving around the scepter like a lunatic and goes to address him angrily. He argues with Flair as the ref tries to take the weapon away from Flair. Hurricane manages to recover and push HHH into Flair knocking him off the apron and rolls up The Game for the surprise pin. HHH is livid. He immediately destroys The Hurricane afterward and looks towards Flair in fury. However, Flair has the mic and addresses Hurricane.***

Flair: YOU SEE?!?! Even if you win the battle, you will not win the war! My faithful sidekick, let us depart! TO THE CAR!!!

***Flair runs to the back apparently to the parking lot. HHH follows in hot pursuit still eager to vent his grievances.

HHH is then shown arriving in the parking lot where he last saw the Evolution limo. He sees Flair and makes a beeline towards him. He starts a tirade but notices what's behind Flair. The limo has been redone with flames across the sides, the name Doctor Naitch spraypainted all over in random places, and other additions that make the limo look like a bad Batmobile.***

HHH: WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO THE LIMO?!?!?!?

Flair: It's NOT a limo! It's Naitch's Indestructable Mobile Rampager Of Doom, or NIMROD for short! We will take this vessel with Rosey in it onto Backlash where we will finally deliver a fatal crushing blow to the Hurricane! Hurry, get in, he might be coming after us!!!

***HHH can't even respond. He stares at the vehicle with a gaped mouth and arms outstretched in disbelief. He collapses to his knees. His beautiful ride, ruined for reasons he doesn't understand.***

Flair: Woah, woah, woah. I think I hear someone coming. Hold them off, I'm heading back to the Dome. I'll meet up with you later! ONTO BACKLASH! Muahahahahahaha!!!

***The show ends as Flair gets into the NIMROD and drives off. The last image seen is HHH still in kneeling position.***

___________________________________________________

So, there ya go. Hope it wasn't too much of a hassle to read although I really think it might work on some bizarre level. It's probably the sleep talking but it's certainly no worse than some of the other stuff we've seen. Questions, comments, additions, rants? Feel free to post. I be out.

***DISCLAIMER***: This script is in no shape or form intended to be that of something resembling anything rational, intelligent, or sensible. It is intended for entertainment purposes only and possibly the humiliation of Triple H on live TV. It is not intended to portray people from North Carolina in a bad light or in a manner in which they can only act out silly roles and gimmicks. No animals were harmed during the conception of this script or its original inspiration though M-A-G did consume a hamburger during such activity.

**Marcyo** · 03-05-2005, 02:03 PM

I love that. You should be head writer in WWE.

**tucsonspeed6** · 03-05-2005, 02:13 PM

I read all of it, and I must say that for being completly absurd, it sure takes the cake. However, I think it would draw too many face pops for Flair. I don't think it'd draw too much money.

**Marcyo** · 03-05-2005, 02:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tucsonspeed6

I read all of it, and I must say that for being completly absurd, it sure takes the cake. However, I think it would draw too many face pops for Flair. I don't think it'd draw too much money.

Nope, but it'd be funny as hell and would boost the ratings

**Jaton** · 03-05-2005, 02:46 PM

What is this EWR you speak of?

**Fignuts** · 03-05-2005, 02:47 PM

Oh my god that is hilarious.

**James Steele** · 03-05-2005, 02:53 PM

(cubed)

**M-A-G** · 03-05-2005, 02:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jaton

What is this EWR you speak of?

-EDIT-

Never mind, doesn't work.

Someone give him the link to a download.

**James Steele** · 03-05-2005, 03:54 PM

http://www.extreme-warfare.com

EWR is a Wrestling Promoter sim. You run a wrestling promotion in North America. (Canadian,Mexican, and American promotions). You will hire/fire wrestlers and staff, book the matches and shows, are responsible for signing sponsors, and even get TV deals.

***Be warned that it is a German site, so run any and all spyware/virus scan stuff you have. I didn't pick up anything, but you never know. Also, they have all the picture packs and everything.***

**Fignuts** · 03-05-2005, 03:57 PM

The guy who makes it has a commercial version coming out, so EWR is going to be quite difficult to find.

**#1-norm-fan** · 03-05-2005, 03:57 PM

I want TEW

**Fignuts** · 03-05-2005, 03:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JamesSteele

www.extremewarfare.com

EWR is a Wrestling Promoter sim. You run a wrestling promotion in North America. (Canadian,Mexican, and American promotions). You will hire/fire wrestlers and staff, book the matches and shows, are responsible for signing sponsors, and even get TV deals.

***Be warned that it is a German site, so run any and all spyware/virus scan stuff you have. I didn't pick up anything, but you never know. Also, they have all the picture packs and everything.***

Doesn't work

**James Steele** · 03-05-2005, 03:59 PM

I fixed the link in it Figz. It is http://www.extreme-warfare.com . I forgot the damn hyphen.

**Corkscrewed** · 03-05-2005, 04:29 PM

Oh man, that was priceless! HHH would never agree to it, but I'd love to see that nevertheless!

**Mr. Nerfect** · 03-05-2005, 08:20 PM

I think Ric Flair would be more likely to object, but that was great. I would buy Backlash just for that angle, and you could then do The Hurricane vs. Rosey at the PPV, and have The Hurricane sneak out a victory, and Flair vowes revenge.

It would also give jobbers a nice role on TV. Doc. Naitch could bring in jobbers with "superpowers" that were experiments of his. I would mark out for Richards to return as "Stevie Invisible". It is revealed he was the one who captured Rosey for Naitch, and allows him to be brainwashed. This can lead to a Stevie Invisible & Super-Jobber vs. The Hurricane & Rosey match, as well as respective matches against The Hurricane and Rosey, with Stevie going over each time due to him being "invisible" (they just have The Hurricane and Rosey pretend he's there beating them up). Eventually you have a "All Powers Banned Match" between The Hurricane and Stevie Invisible, with The Hurricane picking up the win. You could even have it revealed that if The Hurricane pins a villain they lose their powers.

Wow, I'm really getting into this angle. It would be weird, but all in good fun. Doctor Naitch vs. The Hurricane at WrestleMania 22 in their Final Conflict? I can actually see me buying the PPV solely for that match.

**M-A-G** · 03-05-2005, 09:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alienoid06

I think Ric Flair would be more likely to object, but that was great. I would buy Backlash just for that angle, and you could then do The Hurricane vs. Rosey at the PPV, and have The Hurricane sneak out a victory, and Flair vowes revenge.

It would also give jobbers a nice role on TV. Doc. Naitch could bring in jobbers with "superpowers" that were experiments of his. I would mark out for Richards to return as "Stevie Invisible". It is revealed he was the one who captured Rosey for Naitch, and allows him to be brainwashed. This can lead to a Stevie Invisible & Super-Jobber vs. The Hurricane & Rosey match, as well as respective matches against The Hurricane and Rosey, with Stevie going over each time due to him being "invisible" (they just have The Hurricane and Rosey pretend he's there beating them up). Eventually you have a "All Powers Banned Match" between The Hurricane and Stevie Invisible, with The Hurricane picking up the win. You could even have it revealed that if The Hurricane pins a villain they lose their powers.

Wow, I'm really getting into this angle. It would be weird, but all in good fun. Doctor Naitch vs. The Hurricane at WrestleMania 22 in their Final Conflict? I can actually see me buying the PPV solely for that match.

Dude, I can totally see that working on some weird level, oddly enough.

As an add-on, the mystery device that 'Doctor Naitch' was supposed to unveil was a super-amplifier that would allow him to incapicitate entire cities with a single 'WHOOOO!' And, no, I have no idea what the hell I was on when I was coming with this stuff.

03-05-2005, 10:07 PM

23.5 Megs? Is it text only or some shit?

**El Santo** · 03-05-2005, 11:09 PM

And don't forget that sometime around Survivor Series, Hurricane assemble the League of Extraordinary Wrestlers to counter the forces of Dr. Naitch in a classic 4-on-4 match.

And who is the mystery fourth member on the LXW?

None other than that returning icon ... Mr. America!

Which would lead, of course, to Mr. America vs. Dr. Naitch re-match. Ah, yes, Hogan vs. Flair... only horribly, horribly twisted.

**Mr. Nerfect** · 03-06-2005, 02:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by El Santo

And don't forget that sometime around Survivor Series, Hurricane assemble the League of Extraordinary Wrestlers to counter the forces of Dr. Naitch in a classic 4-on-4 match.

And who is the mystery fourth member on the LXW?

None other than that returning icon ... Mr. America!

Which would lead, of course, to Mr. America vs. Dr. Naitch re-match. Ah, yes, Hogan vs. Flair... only horribly, horribly twisted.

The League of Extraordinary Wrestlers: The Hurricane, Rosey, Snit(sky) the S.H.I.T., Mr. America & Mighty Molly

The Naitch's Boys: The Cerebral Assassin (Triple H), Captain Charisma, Goatboy (Tyson Tomko), Stevie Invisible & Queen Victoria

Back-ups can include The Blingpin (Shelton Benjamin) and The Big Valbowski. BTW, I would mark out for Rhyno joining Doctor Naitch.

03-06-2005, 03:57 AM

OMG TEW SUCKS ASS.

**Bad Company** · 03-06-2005, 05:08 AM

Nice one MAG. But why not bring in Captain America while all this is going on?

**Hired Hitman** · 03-06-2005, 05:24 AM

That would rule... If this was 1998.

**wrathchildCEW** · 03-06-2005, 11:44 AM

M-A-G... whatever you've been smoking, I want some of it

That just totally ruled.

**Doink** · 03-06-2005, 12:51 PM

just 1 question, what the hell happens at backlash then???????

**M-A-G** · 03-06-2005, 02:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Doink

just 1 question, what the hell happens at backlash then???????

Order the PPV.

**Kane Knight** · 03-06-2005, 08:47 PM

Reasons this would never fly:

1) No necrophillia. Unless Triple H has sex with Flair after he bites it, no dice.

2) Not enough poopy jokes. Though flair's getting old.

3) It makes a shitload more sense than 90% of the crap on the WWE's scripting right now. You'd make the lazy fuckers look bad, and if we allowed that, it might set a precedent for wrestlers too.

**Chavo Classic** · 03-07-2005, 10:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Marcyo

I love that. You should be head writer in WWE.

I think he was already head writer in WCW

**Mr. Nerfect** · 03-07-2005, 11:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Doink

just 1 question, what the hell happens at backlash then???????

Ric Flair reveals he's turned Rosey into "The Rosebot" and he sends him to take care of The Hurricane. Helms defeats The Rosebot and sets him free from Naitch's control. During this match you have Doctor Naitch standing on a special podium he sets up (maybe something like the one wrestlers used to catch to the ring) and have Triple H try and talk some sense into Ric beside him.

**M-A-G** · 03-12-2005, 01:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chavo Jnr Jnr

I think he was already head writer in WCW

You have no proof of this.

**M-A-G** · 03-12-2005, 01:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alienoid06

Ric Flair reveals he's turned Rosey into "The Rosebot" and he sends him to take care of The Hurricane. Helms defeats The Rosebot and sets him free from Naitch's control. During this match you have Doctor Naitch standing on a special podium he sets up (maybe something like the one wrestlers used to catch to the ring) and have Triple H try and talk some sense into Ric beside him.

Then Doctor Naitch tries to send Triple H after the two heroes with the sledgehammer now decked out with fancy jewels and an orb on the top. Triple H asks what the hell happened with the hammer and while he's distracted, Rosey and Hurricane double team the poor guy and whack Flair with the sledge-scepter. They then blow up "the device" by crashing the NIMROD into it ending with a large pyro explosion. Triple H goes nuts and has a mental breakdown.

**Mr. Nerfect** · 03-12-2005, 04:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by M-A-G

Then Doctor Naitch tries to send Triple H after the two heroes with the sledgehammer now decked out with fancy jewels and an orb on the top. Triple H asks what the hell happened with the hammer and while he's distracted, Rosey and Hurricane double team the poor guy and whack Flair with the sledge-scepter. They then blow up "the device" by crashing the NIMROD into it ending with a large pyro explosion. Triple H goes nuts and has a mental breakdown.

He then comes back only known as "The Cerebral Assassin" and plays the role of Doctor Naitch's psychotic hitman.

Doctor Naitch, The Cerebral Assassin, Stevie Invisible & Mr Maven vs. The Hurricane, Rosey, Rhyno & Nova then takes place in a War Games Match at Vengeance.

**M-A-G** · 03-12-2005, 02:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alienoid06

He then comes back only known as "The Cerebral Assassin" and plays the role of Doctor Naitch's psychotic hitman.

Doctor Naitch, The Cerebral Assassin, Stevie Invisible & Mr Maven vs. The Hurricane, Rosey, Rhyno & Nova then takes place in a War Games Match at Vengeance.

I'm so there.

03-05-2005, 01:46 PM	#1
M-A-G Higher. Further. Faster. Posts: 21,180	This might be the lack of sleep talking but I think this would draw huge money... So, yeah, the following is based on my friend's decision while playing EWR to give Ric Flair the "Super Villain" gimmick, which debuted to a positive response, mind you. If you don't know what EWR is, get your lazy ass over to the website and download it! Anyways, the setting is Raw after WrestleMania, Batista fresh off a World Heavyweight Title victory over Triple H, the former champ in one of his usual post-PPV loss moods, and Eric Bischoff ordering a No DQ rematch for the title that night. Begin scene.... *Triple H and Ric Flair are in their dressing room. Triple H is pacing back and forth, furious, psyching himself up. Naitch has just finished watching The Hurricane job to Muhammad Hassan on the monitor and addresses the former champion* Flair: Hunter, look at that. I can't believe it. A fellow North Carolina native getting his ass handed to him. I tried talking to that kid but it's like nothing gets through to him. *Triple H doesn't stop pacing. His breaths are getting louder and more furious* Flair: Hey, hey, champ, champ. What's the matter? You're not that worried about the match tonight are you? *Triple H stops his pacing and faces Flair, not looking anywhere else but into his eyes. The furious look on The Game's face does not change* Flair: Hunter come on. Last night was just a mishap. A minor stumble. We all know who the real man is. Hell, even Bischoff knows it! That's why he picked you to be the first to get a shot at Batista. You are Triple H! The greatest wrestler ALIVE TODAY!!! You've turned away all the challenges that have been in your way since you've been here on Raw. The Jeff Hardys, the RVDs, the Booker Ts, The Scott Steiners, the HBKs! You've even beaten the man, himself, right in front of you! Batista is just like all the others. You've got nothing to worry about, that title is coming back, right back to this waist right here. HHH (after a brief pause): You'd better make sure that happens. *HHH glares at Ric for a while before leaving the dressing room. Ric appears nervous* *Meanwhile, Hurricane is made aware of Ric Flair's comments about his performance earlier. He's not too happy.* *The main event then begins as scheduled. The No DQ stipulation is emphasized by the ring announcer as Jim Ross and The King warn the viewers that it's the carte blanche that HHH needs to beat Batista. The action is intense as HHH tries vainly to overpower Batista. He even tries an early attempt at a sledgehammer shot but it's taken away by Batista and promptly tossed. "I don't need any weapons!" the champion declares confidentally. Fast forward to the ending as Batista is poised to deliver his Demon Bomb. Ric Flair, upon orders from earlier, promptly runs in to low blow the champion and save HHH. He brings in the World Heavyweight belt to give to HHH who is recovering somewhat and instructs him to use it. Batista has balls of steel however and lunges at HHH with his incapacitating clothesline. The challenger ducks, though, and Flair ends up being knocked goofy with the clothesline. HHH takes a swing with the belt but Batista ducks it. Kick, wham, Demon Bomb...1,2,3. Batista celebrates his successful defense while flair is attended to.* *The next week, HHH reveals he's torn about his feeling towards Ric Flair as he feels he cost him the title but reports that Flair hasn't been feeling too well thanks to the clothesline from the previous week. He promises Flair will be back next week and that there will be hell to pay.* *Two weeks after getting knocked goofy with Batista's clothesline, Flair is reportedly in the dressing room reserved for him and Triple H. Upon hearing this, Triple H immediately makes a beeline for the private room, ready to rip his mentor and idol a new one. He's still fuming and things look to explode once HHH opens that door. However, HHH only manages to get a "Ric, y...." out of his mouth before noticing that Flair is not in his traditional attire. HHH is frozen in place with his mouth open. He cannot believe the site before him. For Ric Flair is adorned in a tight black leather outfit with a dark blue trim. Around his neck is a cape patterned after his legendary robes. Around his eyes a blue mask. It's evident that he's been waiting for Triple H as he's standing straight with his hands at his hips, eyes locked on the Game. HHH has not yet fully comprehended what he's looking at.* Flair (in an unusual, swarmy, bold voice): Aha, you're finally here, my boy! I was losing precious time while awaiting your arrival. Time is a very valuable commodity in my headquarters. I trust you have located all the proper materials for my plan? HHH: Flair: You know...THE PLAN?!?! HHH: Flair (exasperated): My goodness, do I have to do everything around here? A man can't find good help these days. HHH (bewildered and taken back): 'Good help'? Naitch, what are you talking about? What are you doing in.... Flair: Woah, woah, woah....It's...Flair turns around to show what's on his cape...DOCTOR Naitch!!! HHH: Flair, I don't have time for this...this...whatever the hell this is. I'm trying to get the World..... Flair: THE WORLD!!! Yes, the world is what we're after. But we must act quickly! Should our plans leak out to The Hurricane and that overweight sidekick of his, we might not get another chance at glory!!! HHH: You're worried about The Hurricane and Rosey?!?! I can take on those goofs myself! Just two weeks ago you.... Flair: MY GOD, MAN! What are you insane?!?! You'd be torn to bits! That flying green freak has toppled some of the mightiest individuals alive. He's been after me for a while so we'd better get while the getting's good. Off to the Naitch Dome! *Flair leaps off screen in a WHOOSH leaving Triple H alone and bewildered. Only confused mutterings are eminating from his mouth before he unleashes.* HHH: What the hell just happened?!?!?! *Next week, Flair opens up the show in the same attire as he was seen in the previous week. This time he's in the ring.* Flair: Hurricane and Rosey! I know you've been monitoring my activities since I came back. But little do you know, I have assembled a device that will bring the world TO ITS KNEES!!! And not even YOU will be able to stop me this time! The world will bow to the might of Doctor Naitch and his empire! I understand this company is holding an event this Sunday called Backlash! I want you there, one-on-one, up close and personal so that you may witness its unveiling. *HHH's music suddenly interrupts and the Game himself inevitably follows suit approaching the ring with a confused, yet angry look on his face. That countenance doesn't change as he enters the ring and takes a mic.* HHH: What the hell are you doing? What the hell is this outfit you're wearing? You haven't been returning my calls. You took the limo last week forcing me to take a taxi. THE GAME DOESN'T RIDE TAXIS!!! Do you know how embarassing that was? And on top of that, I got a bunch of smartass, idiot fans walking up to me asking, "What's up with Flair?", "Where's your belt, champ?", "How come Naitch isn't with you?" And you don't seem to give to give a crap about all that! You're talking crazy about...whatever and claiming the world. I mean, first Orton, then Batista, and now you're leaving me high and dry? WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS? Flair: Leaving you high and dry? What are you talking about? You're gonna be right at my side. The world will be ours for the taking this Sunday! I will defeat The Hurricane in combat, the device will be unleashed, and we will reap the rewards of my evil genius! *HHH is getting more furious. The King alludes to HHH being the only one who should be credited for being an evil genius. HHH looks to offer a rebuttle when The Hurricane's music hits. Rosey and The Hurricane appear on the stage.* Hurricane: Evil Doctor Naitch, we meet again! I've realized I cannot sit back for much longer while you attempt to disrupt the peace and tranquility of the world. We WILL have our encounter at Backlash and I WILL put a stop to your evil plans! But I say that this Sunday is too far away. Let us do combat, tonight! Rosey and myself issue a challenge to you and a partner of your choosing. What do you say, good doctor? HHH: Flair: You want a piece of this? You want to suffer your terrible fate so soon? YOU ARE ON!!! And to throw a monkey wrench into whatever ideas you might have, my partner will none other than my loyal sidekick right here, THE GAME! What do you think of that? HHH (taken back by the 'sidekick' comment): I'll tell you what I think of that.... Flair: So it's on!!! We'll see you and your doom tonight! WHOOOOOOOOO! *Rosey and Hurricane take their leave as Flair poses with an evil smile on his face with his music playing. HHH is frozen in shock and anger and bewilderment. Flair takes his leave leaving HHH behind still trying to appeal.* *Later, backstage, HHH manages to catch up with Ric Flair. He questions the situation again.* HHH: Naitch, Naitch! What the hell was that? Do you know how big of an idiot you looked out there? How big of an idiot I looked out there? I should be focusing on getting back my World Title and getting some straight answers out of you and now I'm stuck in some meaningless match tonight as YOUR sidekick.... Flair: Woah, woah, woah, my dear boy! It is not a meaningless encounter! It's a battle of wills! A battle of psychology! We're going to get into the Hurricane's head tonight! We're going to wear him down! So that when Backlash rolls around, he will be in NO CONDITION to stop me and my plans. Muahahaha!!! Muahaha!!! HHH: WHAT? Flair: Just relax, just relax. I got everything under control. *Flair leaves again leaving HHH confused.* *Later, the main event is slated to begin. HHH and Flair come out, separately, however. The music of the heros is played but only Hurricane comes out. Rosey is nowhere to be found. Flair takes the mic before the match can begin and address Hurricane.* Flair (with an evil smile): Soooo, Mr. Hurricane! Seems, you've lost your sidekick. What's the matter? It's THAT hard to find someone that big? Now, we can go on with this but before we do I've got something to show you. *Flair points to the TitanTron. Hurricane looks at the screen to see Rosey bound and gagged in what appears to be a trunk to a vehicle, possibly the limo of Evolution. Rosey is struggling to get free as Hurricane looks on in shock and worry.* Flair: So now, Hurricane. You've got two choices. You can allow my good sidekick here to defeat you in combat and thus save your buddy. Or you shall feel the wrath of DOCTOR NAITCH!!! What's it gonna be?!?!? *Hurricane looks nervously at the screen and his two opponents back and forth. Suddenly he rushes forward to take a shot at Flair but gets jumped from behind by HHH. The bell rings and Flair exits the ring as The Game takes over on Hurricane. Flair seems confident in Hunter to let him go at it alone as he remains on the apron not even attempting to tag in. The match appears to turn in favor of Hurricane as he gets in a low blow as the ref is distracted with Flair's shenanigans on the apron. Seeing HHH in peril, Flair goes under the ring to pull out what appears to be a scepter. Hurricane tries a chokeslam in the meantime but the Game counters into a DDT to lay him out. HHH sees Flair waving around the scepter like a lunatic and goes to address him angrily. He argues with Flair as the ref tries to take the weapon away from Flair. Hurricane manages to recover and push HHH into Flair knocking him off the apron and rolls up The Game for the surprise pin. HHH is livid. He immediately destroys The Hurricane afterward and looks towards Flair in fury. However, Flair has the mic and addresses Hurricane.* Flair: YOU SEE?!?! Even if you win the battle, you will not win the war! My faithful sidekick, let us depart! TO THE CAR!!! *Flair runs to the back apparently to the parking lot. HHH follows in hot pursuit still eager to vent his grievances. HHH is then shown arriving in the parking lot where he last saw the Evolution limo. He sees Flair and makes a beeline towards him. He starts a tirade but notices what's behind Flair. The limo has been redone with flames across the sides, the name Doctor Naitch spraypainted all over in random places, and other additions that make the limo look like a bad Batmobile.* HHH: WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO THE LIMO?!?!?!? Flair: It's NOT a limo! It's Naitch's Indestructable Mobile Rampager Of Doom, or NIMROD for short! We will take this vessel with Rosey in it onto Backlash where we will finally deliver a fatal crushing blow to the Hurricane! Hurry, get in, he might be coming after us!!! *HHH can't even respond. He stares at the vehicle with a gaped mouth and arms outstretched in disbelief. He collapses to his knees. His beautiful ride, ruined for reasons he doesn't understand.* Flair: Woah, woah, woah. I think I hear someone coming. Hold them off, I'm heading back to the Dome. I'll meet up with you later! ONTO BACKLASH! Muahahahahahaha!!! *The show ends as Flair gets into the NIMROD and drives off. The last image seen is HHH still in kneeling position.* ___________________________________________________ So, there ya go. Hope it wasn't too much of a hassle to read although I really think it might work on some bizarre level. It's probably the sleep talking but it's certainly no worse than some of the other stuff we've seen. Questions, comments, additions, rants? Feel free to post. I be out. *DISCLAIMER*: This script is in no shape or form intended to be that of something resembling anything rational, intelligent, or sensible. It is intended for entertainment purposes only and possibly the humiliation of Triple H on live TV. It is not intended to portray people from North Carolina in a bad light or in a manner in which they can only act out silly roles and gimmicks. No animals were harmed during the conception of this script or its original inspiration though M-A-G did consume a hamburger during such activity. No matter what may happen to me, just remember Lzzy Hale gave me the bedroom eyes... ...again.

03-05-2005, 02:03 PM	#2
Marcyo Viva la Raza Posts: 3,539	I love that. You should be head writer in WWE.

03-05-2005, 02:13 PM	#3
tucsonspeed6 Banned WWE on 1/1/07 Posts: 2,141	I read all of it, and I must say that for being completly absurd, it sure takes the cake. However, I think it would draw too many face pops for Flair. I don't think it'd draw too much money.

03-05-2005, 02:46 PM	#5
Jaton BISONICA Posts: 2,681	What is this EWR you speak of?

03-05-2005, 02:47 PM	#6
Fignuts Hey Mister! Posts: 54,952	Oh my god that is hilarious.

03-05-2005, 02:53 PM	#7
James Steele TPWW's HHH Mark Since '04 Posts: 29,886	(cubed)

03-05-2005, 03:54 PM	#9
James Steele TPWW's HHH Mark Since '04 Posts: 29,886	http://www.extreme-warfare.com EWR is a Wrestling Promoter sim. You run a wrestling promotion in North America. (Canadian,Mexican, and American promotions). You will hire/fire wrestlers and staff, book the matches and shows, are responsible for signing sponsors, and even get TV deals. *Be warned that it is a German site, so run any and all spyware/virus scan stuff you have. I didn't pick up anything, but you never know. Also, they have all the picture packs and everything.*

03-05-2005, 03:57 PM	#10
Fignuts Hey Mister! Posts: 54,952	The guy who makes it has a commercial version coming out, so EWR is going to be quite difficult to find.

03-05-2005, 03:57 PM	#11
#1-norm-fan Resident drug enabler Posts: 45,473	I want TEW

03-05-2005, 03:59 PM	#13
James Steele TPWW's HHH Mark Since '04 Posts: 29,886	I fixed the link in it Figz. It is http://www.extreme-warfare.com . I forgot the damn hyphen.

03-05-2005, 04:29 PM	#14
Corkscrewed Posts: 18,357	Oh man, that was priceless! HHH would never agree to it, but I'd love to see that nevertheless!

03-05-2005, 08:20 PM	#15
Mr. Nerfect Posts: 61,634	I think Ric Flair would be more likely to object, but that was great. I would buy Backlash just for that angle, and you could then do The Hurricane vs. Rosey at the PPV, and have The Hurricane sneak out a victory, and Flair vowes revenge. It would also give jobbers a nice role on TV. Doc. Naitch could bring in jobbers with "superpowers" that were experiments of his. I would mark out for Richards to return as "Stevie Invisible". It is revealed he was the one who captured Rosey for Naitch, and allows him to be brainwashed. This can lead to a Stevie Invisible & Super-Jobber vs. The Hurricane & Rosey match, as well as respective matches against The Hurricane and Rosey, with Stevie going over each time due to him being "invisible" (they just have The Hurricane and Rosey pretend he's there beating them up). Eventually you have a "All Powers Banned Match" between The Hurricane and Stevie Invisible, with The Hurricane picking up the win. You could even have it revealed that if The Hurricane pins a villain they lose their powers. Wow, I'm really getting into this angle. It would be weird, but all in good fun. Doctor Naitch vs. The Hurricane at WrestleMania 22 in their Final Conflict? I can actually see me buying the PPV solely for that match.

03-05-2005, 10:07 PM	#17
M. Banana Guest Posts: n/a	23.5 Megs? Is it text only or some shit?

03-05-2005, 11:09 PM	#18
El Santo One Man Horror Show Posts: 1,046	And don't forget that sometime around Survivor Series, Hurricane assemble the League of Extraordinary Wrestlers to counter the forces of Dr. Naitch in a classic 4-on-4 match. And who is the mystery fourth member on the LXW? None other than that returning icon ... Mr. America! Which would lead, of course, to Mr. America vs. Dr. Naitch re-match. Ah, yes, Hogan vs. Flair... only horribly, horribly twisted.

03-06-2005, 03:57 AM	#20
M. Banana Guest Posts: n/a	OMG TEW SUCKS ASS.

03-06-2005, 05:08 AM	#21
Bad Company Mad Posts: 26,228	Nice one MAG. But why not bring in Captain America while all this is going on?

03-06-2005, 05:24 AM	#22
Hired Hitman The Next Great One н� Posts: 18,684	That would rule... If this was 1998.

03-06-2005, 11:44 AM	#23
wrathchildCEW in the face. Posts: 101	M-A-G... whatever you've been smoking, I want some of it That just totally ruled.

03-06-2005, 12:51 PM	#24
Doink Posts: 1,434	just 1 question, what the hell happens at backlash then???????

03-06-2005, 08:47 PM	#26
Kane Knight Ron Paul 4 EVA Posts: 152,467	Reasons this would never fly: 1) No necrophillia. Unless Triple H has sex with Flair after he bites it, no dice. 2) Not enough poopy jokes. Though flair's getting old. 3) It makes a shitload more sense than 90% of the crap on the WWE's scripting right now. You'd make the lazy fuckers look bad, and if we allowed that, it might set a precedent for wrestlers too.