SmackDown! - Captions (04/08/04)

**Rock Bottom** · 04-08-2004, 11:28 PM

It took a cowboy hat and one hell of a promo to convince the WWE that Bradshaw was not... theweakestlink!

Vince: ...so then, I told him it was the Golden Box of Buried Gimmicks. You think he'll fall for it?

Scotty was having a great time in the ring, until he spotted someone in the crowd with a sign... "I Still Know What Rikishi Did Last SummerSlam."

SmackDown! aired into the USA for the first time from Japan, and the translation was a failure.

--A.D. 2004 SMACKDOWN WAS BEGINNING.--

Rikishi: What happen!
Scotty: Someone set up us the powerbomb.
Rikishi: We get signal.
Scotty: What!!
Rikishi: Main TitanTron turn on. It's you.
D'Von: How are you gentlemen. All your base are belong to us. You are on the way to destruction.
Scotty: What you say!!
Bubba: You have no chance to survive make your time. Ha Ha Ha Ha . . !
D'Von: Table and then them the wood!

Angle had copied Charlie's whopper for the last time.

Just when Jr. had the Illegal Immigrant Title secure, Cheech Marin came down and explained why he was late for the match.
Ref: So I'm walking down the street, right, minding my own business... And then... I swear to God. And then there was this burning building. So I went inside, and I rescued a burning baby. And so I got burning baby all over my clothes, and that's what happened to my clothes.

Teddy Long wasn't happy with his new role as the Jobber nanny.

To add insult to injury, after Cena had the match won, he sent a cellular text message to his opponent: "u cant c me."

Cena: Haven't I been here before?
Lt. Dan: God damnit Cena! Leave me! I'm supposed to die, with honor!
Cena: You're not Lt. Dan...
Lt. Dan: Yes I am, Lt. Dan Basham, and I demand you leave me behind with my men?
Cena:

After a couple years of disgust, Big Show made a stand and took it upon himself to elevate RVD to where he belonged.

WWE used RVD to practice a new screwjob technique, in which after RVD got chokeslammed, the ref wouldn't ring the bell. Instead, he would hit an elbow drop on RVD.

Bush: Haha, I got it. I hacked into the votes. My competition won't stand a chance... Now let's see... (Stupified look, starts typing)

When Kurt asked Eddie if he wanted to be a contender for the All American trophy, Eddie just rolled his eyes and left. Very funny Kurt.

Teddy was going to take a stand. He was sick of all the retarded people in the WWE being white men.

Michael Jackson's first "Hug a Little Boy" foundation meeting was a success.

"All Dudley Dogs Go to Heaven" was a success.

The ref couldn't believe it, when all the sudden during the match, some Chihuahua from the crowd ran into the ring to hump Stamboli's leg!

Teddy: That's right, cracka. Frank and beans, mother ****er.

The WWE's playwrite of "Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure" was met with a bit of uncertainty.

Steve Berman: Alright, Eminem just died in a paintball gun war with ICP in Detroit. Which one of you wants to replace him?

Kurt: Does my breast feel lumpy to you? Come on, touch it!
Bradshaw: Hmmm...
Kurt: Do you feel anything?
Bradshaw: Well yeah, I fe, erm, no...
Cena: ...
Bradshaw: John!
Cena: IT WAS ALL JUST A BUNCH OF LINES WASN'T IT!

John Cena: Old Spice is where it is, you can apply it and it won't feel like sticky jizz. It glides on clear man it's extra smoothe, you won't smell funky like them other dudes. So go right now and get yourself a stick, and if you don't like it you can suck my--
Crowd: Fuck!
Cena: ...

Goro finally fulfilled his childhood dream when he met a real NBA Basketball player.

Eddie would not comment when he was caught inside Trish's bra cup.

Eddie was the new lucky pick for MTV's "Pimp My Ride," hosted by Xzibit.

Eddie: What the hell!? I am the President of the United States!?
(Somewhere in D.C.)
Bush: God... Damnit! What is WRONG with this thing!? (Still typing)

Kurt and Bradshaw were done pretending, because everyone knew Steph McMahon's titties were homos.

Eddie Guerrero buried Eugene once and for all when he accepted the WWE "Special" Talent award.

Angle: Come on Eddie, what's in your pocket.
Eddie: Oh, nothing, heh...
Angle: Come on Eddie, quit playing around, I know you stole something of mine.
Eddie: Oh, all right. (Pulls some bone spurs out of his pocket)

Eddie Guerrero had all sorts of things in his pocket to use as an illegal object, including the mummified penis of John Bobbit.

Eddie Guerrero as a Final Fantasy 1 character was a big success, with equipment such as S. Chair, WWE Belt. But if only the thief chose the right pillar to prove his courage, he could become a ninja.

(A few weeks earlier)

Vince: All right everyone. To address the issue that we have lost so much talent, the WWE has decided to step up and push someone we felt needed a push all along. A person whose talent is unsurpassed in the WWE, who shows promising charisma, great technical skills, and is young and fresh enough to pioneer the WWE into the next generation. Ladies and gentlemen, I pick... Bradshaw!
Bradshaw:

04-08-2004, 11:28 PM	#1
Rock Bottom Ball So Hard University Posts: 8,450	SmackDown! - Captions (04/08/04) It took a cowboy hat and one hell of a promo to convince the WWE that Bradshaw was not... theweakestlink! Vince: ...so then, I told him it was the Golden Box of Buried Gimmicks. You think he'll fall for it? Scotty was having a great time in the ring, until he spotted someone in the crowd with a sign... "I Still Know What Rikishi Did Last SummerSlam." SmackDown! aired into the USA for the first time from Japan, and the translation was a failure. --A.D. 2004 SMACKDOWN WAS BEGINNING.-- Rikishi: What happen! Scotty: Someone set up us the powerbomb. Rikishi: We get signal. Scotty: What!! Rikishi: Main TitanTron turn on. It's you. D'Von: How are you gentlemen. All your base are belong to us. You are on the way to destruction. Scotty: What you say!! Bubba: You have no chance to survive make your time. Ha Ha Ha Ha . . ! D'Von: Table and then them the wood! Angle had copied Charlie's whopper for the last time. Just when Jr. had the Illegal Immigrant Title secure, Cheech Marin came down and explained why he was late for the match. Ref: So I'm walking down the street, right, minding my own business... And then... I swear to God. And then there was this burning building. So I went inside, and I rescued a burning baby. And so I got burning baby all over my clothes, and that's what happened to my clothes. Teddy Long wasn't happy with his new role as the Jobber nanny. To add insult to injury, after Cena had the match won, he sent a cellular text message to his opponent: "u cant c me." Cena: Haven't I been here before? Lt. Dan: God damnit Cena! Leave me! I'm supposed to die, with honor! Cena: You're not Lt. Dan... Lt. Dan: Yes I am, Lt. Dan Basham, and I demand you leave me behind with my men? Cena: After a couple years of disgust, Big Show made a stand and took it upon himself to elevate RVD to where he belonged. WWE used RVD to practice a new screwjob technique, in which after RVD got chokeslammed, the ref wouldn't ring the bell. Instead, he would hit an elbow drop on RVD. Bush: Haha, I got it. I hacked into the votes. My competition won't stand a chance... Now let's see... (Stupified look, starts typing) When Kurt asked Eddie if he wanted to be a contender for the All American trophy, Eddie just rolled his eyes and left. Very funny Kurt. Teddy was going to take a stand. He was sick of all the retarded people in the WWE being white men. Michael Jackson's first "Hug a Little Boy" foundation meeting was a success. "All Dudley Dogs Go to Heaven" was a success. The ref couldn't believe it, when all the sudden during the match, some Chihuahua from the crowd ran into the ring to hump Stamboli's leg! Teddy: That's right, cracka. Frank and beans, mother ***er. The WWE's playwrite of "Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure" was met with a bit of uncertainty. Steve Berman: Alright, Eminem just died in a paintball gun war with ICP in Detroit. Which one of you wants to replace him? Kurt: Does my breast feel lumpy to you? Come on, touch it! Bradshaw: Hmmm... Kurt: Do you feel anything? Bradshaw: Well yeah, I fe, erm, no... Cena: ... Bradshaw: John! Cena: IT WAS ALL JUST A BUNCH OF LINES WASN'T IT! John Cena: Old Spice is where it is, you can apply it and it won't feel like sticky jizz. It glides on clear man it's extra smoothe, you won't smell funky like them other dudes. So go right now and get yourself a stick, and if you don't like it you can suck my-- Crowd: Fuck! Cena: ... Goro finally fulfilled his childhood dream when he met a real NBA Basketball player. Eddie would not comment when he was caught inside Trish's bra cup. Eddie was the new lucky pick for MTV's "Pimp My Ride," hosted by Xzibit. Eddie: What the hell!? I am the President of the United States!? (Somewhere in D.C.) Bush: God... Damnit! What is WRONG with this thing!? (Still typing) Kurt and Bradshaw were done pretending, because everyone knew Steph McMahon's titties were homos. Eddie Guerrero buried Eugene once and for all when he accepted the WWE "Special" Talent award. Angle: Come on Eddie, what's in your pocket. Eddie: Oh, nothing, heh... Angle: Come on Eddie, quit playing around, I know you stole something of mine. Eddie: Oh, all right. (Pulls some bone spurs out of his pocket) Eddie Guerrero had all sorts of things in his pocket to use as an illegal object, including the mummified penis of John Bobbit. Eddie Guerrero as a Final Fantasy 1 character was a big success, with equipment such as S. Chair, WWE Belt. But if only the thief chose the right pillar to prove his courage, he could become a ninja. (A few weeks earlier) Vince: All right everyone. To address the issue that we have lost so much talent, the WWE has decided to step up and push someone we felt needed a push all along. A person whose talent is unsurpassed in the WWE, who shows promising charisma, great technical skills, and is young and fresh enough to pioneer the WWE into the next generation. Ladies and gentlemen, I pick... Bradshaw! Bradshaw: Last edited by Rock Bottom; 04-08-2004 at 11:59 PM. Reason: I cannot spell.*