Caption of the Year Qualifying (Jan. - Jun.)

[Corkscrewed]

Okay, here's the deal. Having chosen the top finishers in the six Caption of the Month votes we've had, I have selected 26 captions that have placed into this qualifying round. However, not all of them will make it to the Caption of the Year tournament. 16 captions will be cut.

Now, in this poll, you, the people, are to choose what you feel are the ten best captions of this batch. When voting ends in exactly one week, the ten captions with the most votes will advance to the next round. The rest will receive a consolation prize consisting of Evolution Kool Aid, some cream filling, Rhyno Crazy glue, a personal golden box, and a Lita Pregnancy Kit.

If there is a tie for 10th place, the tie breaker rules go as follows:
1. Among the captions, if one caption is a CotM winner and the other is not, the CotM winner receives precedence and advances.
2. If a tie persists, among the captions, the one that received the most votes during CotM voting will advance.
3. If a tie is still present, among the captions, the one that received the highest PERCENTAGE of votes will advance.
4. If the captions are still tied, the caption that ranked the highest in its own CotM voting will advance.
5. If it's still a tie, a three day playoff will be set to determine the last caption(s). This would basically be a head to head "choose the best one(s)" vote.

Should the ties consist of more than two captions, the tiebreaker formula remains, and captions are eliminated until one remains (two if they are tied for 9th, three if tied for 8th, four if tied for 7th, etc...).

So without further ado, I present to you the candidates. Remember, choose the top ten.

Loopydate:

After botching a move, Chavo had to go to the "Time Out Chair."


Rico does his "Vince McMahon watching a hoss match" impression.

Corkscrewed:

Holly: "Stupid. Chair. Dammit... Easy-Fold my ass!"

Loose Cannon:

Kurt, "Wow, what's this golden box"
Heyman, "Well that's where Vince keeps his buried gimmicks. Go ahead Dawn, open her up."
Voice from Box, "I'm not telling you anything you don't already know."

Mr. Monday Morning:

"So then Jesus rides into Nazareth on a donkey, and this woman shouts 'Nice ass!', and...what?"

Kane Knight:

Thanks to Affirmative Action, the WWE was forced to create the WWE "illegal immigrant" title.

Nowhere Man:

Show does his world-famous impression of the entire Jackson family, complete with Michael's crotch grabbing, Janet's nipple slipping, and Tito's wondering-where-the-hell-his-career-went.

ColdwaVer:

Failing proctology, Lesnar becomes WWE's "naptime enforcer."

Nowhere Man:

HBK: Look, Bret, I know you're probably still upset about the whole--
Benoit: My name's not Bret. It's Chris.
HBK: Oh! Well, I like the new hair color! Looks better than when I beat you last year!
Benoit: Wrong Chris.
HBK: Jeez, how many of you guys are there?!

Rock Bottom:

Benoit: TAP OUT TRIPLE H!
Triple H: NEVER! Why in the HELL would I job the gold to you cleanly at Mania and sell that weak move!? I AM THE GAME!
Benoit: Look Triple H. A spider on the mat right under your right hand!
Triple H: OMG KILL IT! KILL IT! I AM AFRAID OF SPIDERS! (Pounding the mat profusely)

loopydate:

STEVE: You wouldn't happen to know where the Divas' locker room is, would you?
SHELTON: Down the hall to the left. Why?
STEVE: No reason. *Cracks knuckles* I'll be back in a minute.

Sascha:

You mean there's a whole OTHER roster to be buried???

PorkSoda:

Bradshaw: And there he was just above my chambored door, he squealed at me like nothing more, he took my boozm's to the bedroom floor, and whacked about on my door. Who was this on my bedroom floor, smacking me like a chambored door? I reached the door, hoping for a glore, it was just Stephanie, poking on my chambored door like a 2 cent baby whore! Quote the Bradshaw, nevermore!

Fryza:

Scotty: IT'S MORPHING TIME!

Savior:

JR: ROCK BOTTOM!

Rock Bottom:

Triple H: I AM SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CRAP. Unbelievable. How DARE you have leaves greener than my face.
Tree: ...
Triple H: Look at me when I'm talking to you, you jobbing piece of shit.

loopydate:

GAIL: As the future World Women's Champion, I encourage you from time to time - and always in a respectful manner - to critique my matches. If you're unconvinced that a particular move I've used is the wisest, tell me so, but allow me to convince you and I promise you right here and now, no subject will ever be taboo. Except, of course, the subject that was just under discussion. The price you pay for bringing up the fact that I'm a Canadian being announced as "from Korea" as a negative is - I collect your ****ing arm. Just like this ****er here. Now, if any of you botchtastic bitches got anything else to say, NOW'S THE ****ING TIME! I didn't think so.

Kane Knight:

"OH MY GOD! IT VIBRATES!"

Savior:

HHH: I wanna go out there!
Orton: No Hunter you must stay in the back, There's a hurricane coming through.

loopydate:

VOICE: I'm... not... telling... you... anything... you... didn't... already... know!

Nowhere Man:

YOU.....SHALL NOT.....PASSSS!!!!!

loopydate:

P.A.: This is not a drill! The bottom has fallen out of the cage! Sean O'Haire is loose! Repeat, Sean O'Haire is loose!

Corkscrewed:

Eugene demonstrates his "Brock Lesnar meeting a homosexual internet geek" impression.

Back Stabbed:

Lita: Lets see - Means no baby. + means baby. = means hand.

loopydate:

EDGE: Hmm... Maybe if I allowed people to know more, they might actually know me instead of just thinking they know me...

Always450:

Bradshaw botches eating.