Jalen Rose is hilarious

[RP]

Pulled from Bill Simmons column on espn.com.


There's always going to be criticism when your name is Jalen. You have to wear a bulletproof vest and be ready for it."
– Jalen on himself



"Was it for Richard Jefferson?"
– Jalen after hearing that Carter had been traded to New Jersey



"I'm a GM in fantasy basketball and I'm a GM on PlayStation, so on PlayStation I probably would have got a little more, but this is real life, so I don't know."
– Jalen on the Vince Carter trade



"He probably was a little tired from All-Star Weekend. While he was running up and down the court throwing it off the backboard, I was laying on the beach drinking a fruity drink with an umbrella. So I probably gave myself an unfair advantage on that one."
– Jalen explaining why he outplayed Carter two days after the All-Star Game



"I've got to stop this. My entourages are getting entourages."
– Jalen on the trouble of finding tickets for everyone when he returns to Detroit



(And my personal favorite ... )



"Like I told the guys earlier, once he turns 21 and is able to drink, it's over."
– Jalen after LeBron scored 56 on the Raptors