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09-06-2005, 09:13 AM
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#1 | ||||||
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King K Cool
Posts: 28,472
  
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RAW Captions 5/9/05
There are 34 pics to caption this week, but If hardly anyone bothers to do some captions then I'm just gonna forget about doing them.
Because I'm using ImageShack to host these pics so they don't turn into red X's. It took me half an hour to get these pics from WWE.COM and another half an hour to host them.  Enjoy.                                   
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09-06-2005, 09:50 AM
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#2 |
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3 Dicks Out For Trips
Posts: 29,771
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Flair: THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO |
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09-06-2005, 10:06 AM
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#3 |
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He's Here
Posts: 60,735
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Carlito: You're busting my balls here, Ric! Busting my balls! |
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09-06-2005, 10:52 AM
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#4 |
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Backlund Authorised
Posts: 978
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Shawn: (To people at home) I know, I can't believe it either! Shawn: "Hold down" aura, protect me! Masters: What the hell?!, I can't hold it, it's being sent back at me! That was the last time Carlito would make the mistake of asking Flair how his prostate was. Matt: So I sign this and I get a push huh? Eric: Yep, that's the deal Matt: And I won't y'know, just get fired again after the Edge thing is done? Eric: Uhhh no. Just sign it. Matt: Damn, I forgot my glases, hey Eric could you read that bit in small at the bottom? Eric: It's nothing important, just sign it! Matt: You're probably right, there you go, signed and delivered! Wait! I think I can make it out. Jobb....ing.. clause? Eric: Okay, I think I'll take that now. Edge: Stupid Coach, I remember when they'd have a chair for me to sit on. |
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09-06-2005, 11:44 AM
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#5 |
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EL MERO MERO!
Posts: 4,259
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**"Lady in Red" plays in the background.. ** HBK: ...Ummm... Masters? Masters: Shhh... Coming up next on American Movie Classics, "Roiding Bull". Everyone but Chris: ALL HAIL THE KING OF ALL PISS BREAKS! Angle: CHEESE! Cena (to his hand): I know... YES, I know! Psh, of course I returned those videos! They were over-due! What do you think, I'm crazy?! Carlito: Now Dat's Cool. Ashley: WOW.. he's so dreamy.  Ashley was another victim of the "what the five fingers say to the face" joke. Flair is the worst doctor... ever. Flair: HOLY SHIT! I FOUND THE GOLD MINE! THE POOOOOUUUUUUUUNNNNNNCCCCEEE !!!! Hardy: Well, Daddy, here's what I want for Christmas.. Buff Bagwell: Since when have I been working with WW.. wait... It's raining men! Halleyuah it's raining men! Amen! **end** |
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09-06-2005, 01:01 PM
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#6 |
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Taller than Adam Cole
Posts: 10,876
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Shawn: Is that the Invisible Handgun of Doom? Chris: Yes. Shawn: Uh Oh... Even on Showstoppers, Rape by Green Hosses isn't funny. Shawn: Hold up, I gotta blade first. Why does it seem like, after a while, Masters sucks all the color out of the programming? Bret: (Off-Stage) Consider it even, BITCH! The Invisible Chin-up Champion shows his talents. Kurt Angle: Olympic Gold Medalist. Greatest Wrestler in the Sport Today. Spokesman for Aquafresh. Eugene: I'm gonna hurl! Kurt: Let me hold your hair back... Cena is so stale, he wants to punch HIMSELF out. John: You Can't see me, Neidhart. Tyson: I'm not Jim "the Anvil" Neidhart. JR: Bah Gawd, the Diving Hogan Impression off the top! It is OVER! Kurt chuckles, knowing full well that Cena's getting buried by HBK, very subtlely... Ashley is in love. Carlito's version of "One Armed Scissor" is amazing... But she is taken aback by his version of "Meat Hook Sodomy" Ric: And grabbing right here will make your pinkie hurt... Carlito: It will n... OWWW, MY PINKIE! Flair is so over, he can jerk off Carlito in the ring and still get a huge reaction. Second Cameraman from the left: Dude, I just filled the cup. Candice: Why did my entrance take up two pictures? Torrie: I dunno... The blond Medusa gets speared. Super Saiyan Ashley and Super Saiyan Torrie do battle. Vastardikai: You know what? I'm with Carlito on this one: ASSley is more appropriate? Ashley Surfing: The newest hobby of WWE Divas. Headlights ON! Matt: And the cost for your KY Shipments is $500. Questions Only, WWE Style... Edge: Wait a minute... What's this? Lita: Didn't I tell you? Edge: Is that why you only allowed me to give it to you doggie Style? Lita: Is there anything wrong with it? Edge: Does this mean Matt's Gay? Lita: How do you think he got his job back? Edge: Do I really WANT to know the answer to that question? Matt: You broke up my attempt to break the WWE Girl Push-up Record! Gene: It's NOT MY FAULT! You know you suck when your opponent induces vomiting on himself. I get it, he's a golfer. But WHY did he stick a flag pin in his penis? Fan, lower left Corner: Glad I took that piss break during that Cade/Murdock Match... AW SHIT! Ok, who wants popcorn? Several "Vis is gay Rumors" started over the weeks with his desire to hump men... Only to be proven when he gave a Hearthrob head in the center of the ring. |
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09-06-2005, 01:35 PM
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#7 |
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King K Cool
Posts: 28,472
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What a bad place and time to let rip. Eric: Your hair is gorgeous. What do you use? Matt: Herbal Essences: Extracts of peach and Apricot. |
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09-06-2005, 02:07 PM
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#8 |
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I am the cheese
Posts: 51,534
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Masters: I love the way your hair smells. HBK: Oh my God, I cant believe this is happening to me... Masters: I'm almost threw, just shut up Keota: You know nobodies watching you right? RIGHT? Kurt: you're lucky I've gotta take this call! Cena: I've got five reason why you shouldn't be on RAW. It took a lot, but Kurt shows the force is strong with him. I don't know why, but I love this picture. But not as much as I love this one. During the match Kerwin told Shelton that Conway was choking, Benjamin misinterpreted the message. |
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09-06-2005, 02:47 PM
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#9 |
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Ron Paul 4 EVA
Posts: 152,467
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Shawn follows up his brilliant sarcasm on Hogan up with his impression of Jim Carrey while in the Masterlock. --OR-- Masters: This is a stickup! Put me over or I kill you with my imaginary gun! HBK grimaced...Apparently, steroids didn't reduce your package size, and Masters was a little too happy. Hardcore Pattycake didn't do much for Masters' push. "It was a dark and stormy night. The doctors said I was fine, but I could feel another case of the DTs coming on. I knew that I somehow had to get this monkey off my back." SHOWTUNES FILM NOIR!*** ***that's right, Destrol111181823 or whatever, film noir!  --OR-- In his last moments of life, Michaels realised that the dude in seattle wasn't fucked to death by a HORSE. "dude, I can so totally see my face in your bald spot!" Masters: But I've got a push! Mister McMahon loves me! I'm a wrestler! A wrestler!! Men in striped Shirts: It's okay, Chris. We're just here to get you back on your medication... I don't have a caption for this, but isn't this the LEAST blood on Michaels' face since like 1996? "He took the bait hook, like and sinker! I am Chris Masters...The Master-baiter!" "I don't think we should let him write his own material anymore, JR." "I'm with you, King." Angle Desperately tries to stop Eugene from choking out Richards. In revenge, they gave him an invisible facial. "Sorry John, did I step on you? I get I really couldn't see you..." "You can't see...Wow, my breath really IS that bad?" "It's a bird, it's a plane!" "Sorry Goatboy." Angle threatens to hold his breath until he turns blue if Cena doesn't drop the title. "...Kennedy..." "Carlito didn't know you wanted a sex change, John...But dat's cool...Dat's cool." "No, Ric! I swear your keys aren't there! No!" "Wooooo! Now sing the Star Spangled Banner in falcetto!" Yeah, I know what you all are thinking... ...In still photos, they're interesting. You know, I could cap this one, but I can't remember which blond with a fake rack is which. "And then I grab you and kiss you hard, and...Are you sure this is what Vince wanted out of this match?" "I don't know, but the ref isn't complaining..." JR: A Chick pulled off a wrestling move! You know what that means... Coach: I'll get the pink slip. King: I'll gas the arena so there are no witness. Vince: I'll "audition" us some more blondes. "If you can't make eye contact, don't look." Eric: Just how DID you survive electrocution and only get a single, nondescript wound on your head? And weren't you in a street fight before that? Matt: This contract says I can legally kill you for asking those questions... Eric: What questions? --OR-- Eric does his Spock impression to convince Matt to sign his "Save Enterprise" petition. Finally, an announce team to make me wish for Ross/Lawler. "Hold still, or I'll never get my 'X' on this petition!" "But it hurts..." "Do you want to save Star Trek or not?" The WWE fulfils their minority quota in one match...A fag, a redneck... ...And a Latino who's actually NOT digging ditches. Conway: Look at these 8" pythons! Shelton: It's bad enough I'm being jobbed out to a man with no reaction, but why the Hell are they paying me in fried chicken? "It's headed towards that moon!" "That's no moon!" "It's too big to be a battlestation." WWE Kama Sutra 147: Midair jobber fellatio. |
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09-06-2005, 04:58 PM
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#10 |
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Don't be hatin' bitch!
Posts: 874
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Eric to himself: He gets electrocuted and all he needs is a bandage on his head? Doesn't anything make sense here anymore? |
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09-06-2005, 05:24 PM
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#11 | |
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I am the cheese
Posts: 51,534
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09-06-2005, 05:51 PM
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#12 |
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As over as Crystal Pepsi
Posts: 21,639
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Masters: Now if you Canadians refuse to meet my ransom of 10 million dollars this WWE superstar will die! HBK: Aww shit… As punishment for taking the last cookie from the cookie jar Chris Masters forces HBK to watch the newest WWE DVD- The Best Of Chris Masters A moment later HBK regrets telling Chris Masters’ chair to “talk to the hand” Backstage… Eric: Alright, who the fuck put Lita in charge of color? Chris Masters unveils the newest part of his gimmick as a Jewish wrestler. Can that penny on the ground break the Master Lock? And now for the very low price of $9.99 you too can get your very own HBK Shield! HBK: Hip Hop Horary, Hoo, Hey, hoo!!! Masters: Good God man! The hell do you think this is, 1993? Bret: And then that drop of blood broke away into a thousand pieces, and each piece became a fairy! Bret JR: So that means there should be a fairy for every Canadian boy and girl, right? Bret: There should be, but there isn’t. Bret JR: Why not daddy? Bret: Every time someone says “Bret Screwed Bret” there’s a fairy somewhere that drops down dead! Masters: YMC—What? I’m NOT gay! Eugene: What’s up with your teeth? Kurt: Oh yeah, I forgot about that. Vince wants me to look more patriotic when I’m out in public. Man, I can’t believe I have it so hard, trying to kayfabe it up in front of the fans in the grocery store. Eugene: yes… you have it so hard… bitch! It’s not the hair pulling that Eugene minds, it’s what Kurt is doing to Steven Richards… Kurt: John, buddy, pal… I think we need to talk about your little problem… Cena: But I’ve got the bedwetting under control and I no longer think I look pretty in Mommy’s make up! Kurt: I was talking about your nail biting… Cena: ………………………….shit………………. Cena: You can’t see me! Tomko: Neither did half of the people in the arena. All of the sudden they all had to take a whiz. Super Cena, AWAY! Please… far away… Like “back on SmackDown” away… Do it for the children! Kurt: Ah, the Cena/Tomko match is over, and I feel 10 pounds lighter! That was a great bathroom break! Ashley didn’t understand why Carltio tried to say “Fucking Rhyno!” with the mic stuck to his lips. Carltio: Why do you have a job but Charlie Hass doesn’t? Ric Flair shows Carlito why Ashley has a job and Carltio doesn’t. Ric Flair- 2005 The package grabbin’, Caribbean raggin, Triple H kneelin’, ointment smearin’, sonofa bitch! XTREME HUGS!!!! Ashley: Oh My God! The entire audience just saw my ass! Torrie: Don’t flatter yourself, bathroom breaks are at a record high tonight. Matt Hardy was getting ready to sign his soul away for another push just to realize that he already sold it for his return. You know women wouldn’t be objectified in this society if they didn’t ask for it. Women everywhere in every walk of life need to stand up and demand respect. Seriously, why would anyone watch or give a damn about this filth. It’s… errr… degrading toward women and it makes men look like horrid creatures. Not all guys just want to watch there tramps romp around the ring in skimpy outfits. Oh damn, that’s Hot! Where was… Oh yeah… captions… uhhh… You’re a homo! Carlio: Think Happy Thoughts, Think Happy Thoughts… Now THAT’S cool! |
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09-06-2005, 05:51 PM
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#13 |
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A Proud MF'R
Posts: 1,429
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Masters:Wet Willie Wet Willie HBK:What Have I Done To Deserve This Masters:Ok i put my hands behind your head and lock them together is that right shawn HBK: Again what have i done to deserve this HBK: (Thinking) ENOUGH ALREADY WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE THIS JR: Stone Cold Wins Stone Cold Wins Angle:Got your nose Eugene:Hey thats not funny give it back Angle:Come on cena let me do it Cena:No kurt you're not getting my nose Worst Heisman Trophy Stance Ever Carlito: Carlito says he can get ashley in bed in less than 25.5 seconds now dats cool Ashley: Oh that hair i wanna run my fingers through his hair 2 Parter Carlito: So ashely you coming over to carlitos house tonight Ashley: Hell no i'm gonna ride space mountain tonight Carlito: Space mountain closed years ago you dumb blonde This Is What Happens When You Say Space Mountan Closed Watcha Gonna Do When The Nutbuster Runs Wild On You WOOOOOOOOO 2 Parter King: JR I Just Filled 2 Cups Coach: King I Did To 2 Parter Ashley: This is for using the last condom now thanks to you i might be pregnant with vince's baby Torrie: Another one bites the dust Matt:Wait what does this say i'm being traded to smackdown to form a tag team with orlando jordan called b&a whats b&a eric Eric:Buckwheat and alfalfa you're gonna be called the new little rascals Moments Later Matt Hardy Killed Himself Coming soon to ppv laptop computer death matches Conway:I'm buff i'm the stuff and the girls wait what the fuck have i done to myself Kerwins mental telepathy begins to work Conway: I'm coming to join you Shelton: No rob dont it's a trick Conway: But shelton it's not right if it's not white Moments later rob conway was taken to a local hospital after he was t-boned through the ring Vis attempts to rescue the hearthrob from x-pacs sucking machine |
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09-06-2005, 06:11 PM
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#14 |
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He's Here
Posts: 60,735
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Masters (whispering): I like your pants. Who knew that you'd have someone taking a dump and someone sneezing in one picture. Random Redneck: That thar picture prooves wrasslin's fake! Hey ma! Git da kids, were gonna go down ta Hooters for da Paper View! I knew Masters was boring, but did Shawn REALLY have to fall asleep? Masters: LOOK AT MY PACKAGE! Kurt: God damn it I hate taffy. Kurt: FUCKING TAFFY! Kurt: I shall piss in your general direction! Cena: 1.. 2.. 3.. 4.... FUCK DIS MAF SHIT! IT'S TOO HARD! Cena: Did I leave the stove on? Kurt breaks the news to Cena that his house has burned down because he left the stove on. Cena: WHYYYYYY!!!!! Carlito: IF YA SMELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL.... Carlito: Tell Carlito, do you do your own hair or do you just dip it in ink? Carlito: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Ric: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Eugene: OOOOOOOO- Kurt: OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE! Candice: Choo choo! Torrie: You're not half as dumb as Maria! Heyman: GOOOOORRRREEEE! Rhino (in the same ally that Heyman is sleeping in): Just shut up, Paul. Random AOLer: OMFG HLA! OMFGGGGGGGGG!!!!! AOLer: OMFG BUTT! BUTTTTTTTTTTT! AOLer: OMFG MORE BUTTTTT! Vince McMahon: OMFG BOOBIES! LOLZ! *Matt signs.* Matt: Now this will bring back The Rock, right? And it was posted on the Net, right? Bischoff: Uh, yeah, Rock....................... ENTERPRISE SUCKA! HAHAHA! Edge: And you know Kin.... Lita.... What the fuck is that lump? (Insert sexual reference here.) Conway: That's not the Con Way of biting your nails... *Spits nail at Kerwin* Conway: THAT is! Shelton: This is all a bad dream... This is all a bad dream... This is all a- Shelton: WHAT!? WHERE AM I... Shelton: OH MY GOD I'M VISCERA NOW! |
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09-06-2005, 07:04 PM
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#15 | |
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Tedious Inevitability
Posts: 7,521
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Quote:
ROFLMAO |
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09-06-2005, 07:12 PM
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#16 |
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Has an evil monkey...
Posts: 7,299
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Masters: I can't believe you just did that. HBK: Sorry. Masters: It's all over the ring! HBK: I said I'm sorry! |
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09-06-2005, 08:22 PM
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#17 | |
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As over as Crystal Pepsi
Posts: 21,639
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Linear Mode
