Inspired by Chuck Norris...... - Page 3

**Corkscrewed** · 02-15-2006, 04:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FourFifty

The writers don't avoid logic. Logic avoids the writers.

OK! We get it! You can make jokes by flip flopping statements around!

**FourFifty** · 02-15-2006, 04:25 AM

Jim Ross created "god" the moment he said "BAH GAWD" for the first time.

**Skippord** · 02-15-2006, 04:26 AM

Chris Sabin Hasnt held all of the titles in TNA because They're slobbering over AJ's dick...Oh Wait

**D Mac** · 02-15-2006, 04:28 AM

Vince's genetic jackhammer has'nt been used in so long it needs a good dose of WD 40.

**FourFifty** · 02-15-2006, 04:28 AM

A-Train won his hair in a "hair VS hair" match when he fought a rabid wolf when he was five years old. He keeps it on his chest and back as a trophy.

**D Mac** · 02-15-2006, 05:41 AM

It's not "Time To Play The Game", because I'm all out of quarters.

**Pinnacle Charisma** · 02-15-2006, 06:56 AM

I think some people dont really get the meaning of this thread

**What Would Kevin Do?** · 02-15-2006, 07:14 AM

Takeru Kobayashi ate 50 and a half hotdogs in 12 minutes. Viscera ate 12 asian babies in 50 and a half minutes. Viscera won.

Yeah, it's stolen, but still hilarious.

**Londoner** · 02-15-2006, 08:24 AM

According to Vince, the saying isn't 'If it ain't broken, don't fix it'..it's.... 'if it's fixed, then brake it'.

**Kane Knight** · 02-15-2006, 05:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nowhere Man

Kurt Angle's neck isn't really broken; he is actually a human Pez dispenser. Only instead of Pez, he dispenses pain.

The story of Jesus is loosely based upon Kurt Angle's life, which found its way back in time when he slapped the Angle lock on God at Wrestlemania XXV.

**Kane Knight** · 02-15-2006, 05:51 PM

Gilberg has counted to infinity--Twice.
Gilberg's hair isn't receeding, his hair fears being seen by him.
Gilberg invented the C-Section when he jobbed to his mom's uterus.

**Nowhere Man** · 02-15-2006, 06:42 PM

If you cut Hulk Hogan, he bleeds pure HGH

**Xero** · 02-15-2006, 06:45 PM

Oranges were derived from three different things. Lemons for the citrus, Hulk Hogan for the orange, and Triple H for that sting that happens if it goes into your eye.

**D Mac** · 02-16-2006, 02:32 AM

If Rikishi's ass was any bigger, it would have it's own zip code.

**FourFifty** · 02-16-2006, 02:49 AM

During a trip to New York RVD made a 1,000 dollar bet with Superman. The deal was that he can break the earth's pull before Superman can. After RVD won the bet he went out and bought some killer weed because nobody gets higher than Rob Van Dam.

**Corkscrewed** · 02-16-2006, 03:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FourFifty

A-Train won his hair in a "hair VS hair" match when he fought a rabid wolf when he was five years old. He keeps it on his chest and back as a trophy.

There we go, that's a better one.

**Corkscrewed** · 02-16-2006, 03:17 AM

Brock Lesnar once F-5'ed a kid from New York all the way to Ohio--all through his computer!

**Skippord** · 02-16-2006, 03:59 AM

Chris Sabin Eats thunder and craps lightning

**D Mac** · 02-16-2006, 04:07 AM

Tatanka speared Goldberg with a spear before Goldberg could spear Tatanka.

**FourFifty** · 02-16-2006, 02:57 PM

Tim White isn't trying to kill himself. He's just calling death a pussy.

**Anybody Thrilla** · 02-16-2006, 03:27 PM

Shawn Michaels and Captain Charisma were slated to have a blockbuster feud that would have revitalized wrestling as we know it. In the end, however, Michaels refused to go through with the program. When asked why, he simply said "I don't hit Christians".

**Lock Jaw** · 02-16-2006, 05:03 PM

The Big Show and Jim Ross once ate the entire nation of China. They were hungry again in an hour. True story.

**Y2Jeremy** · 02-16-2006, 05:07 PM

HHH is suing God, claiming that He stole the "Almighty" gimmick from his finisher, The Pedigree.

**Xero** · 02-16-2006, 05:16 PM

Triple H is what God would be if he were dog food. He's been inside every dog at least once.

**Y2Jeremy** · 02-17-2006, 01:48 PM

Stone Cold doesn't beat women, he teaches them to fight through examples.

**Xero** · 02-17-2006, 01:54 PM

On the 7th day, God didn't rest, he created Stacy Keibler's legs.

**D Mac** · 02-17-2006, 02:33 PM

When God created Goldust he did'nt just break the mold, it "shattered".

**Kane Knight** · 02-17-2006, 05:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Diesel Mac

When God created Goldust he did'nt just break the mold, it "shattered".

And only because it feared the Bizzarre one.

**Xero** · 02-17-2006, 05:22 PM

A-Train enjoies long walks in the woods. He also claims to be very photogenic, but only from the side.

**Kane Knight** · 02-17-2006, 06:03 PM

Geroge Bush sat for 7 minutes after he was informed of an attack on 9-11 only because he feared Muhammed Hassan was coming for him.

**Skippord** · 02-17-2006, 06:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Xero Limit 126

A-Train enjoies long walks in the woods. He also claims to be very photogenic, but only from the side.

Also he is very blurry

**Kane Knight** · 02-17-2006, 06:23 PM

The Big Bang occurred when Bret Hart and Kurt Angle decided the Universe wasn't big enough for the two of them.

**FourFifty** · 02-17-2006, 06:28 PM

Unknown to most wrestling fans Barry Horwitz was once a boxer. The legendary jobber made it a point to put Glass Joe over.

**Kane Knight** · 02-17-2006, 06:41 PM

Ben Stein stole his monotone gimmick from Lance Storm.

**FourFifty** · 02-17-2006, 07:03 PM

Doesn't deal with wrestling, but I read this and thought of this thread.

"Prince Charming has played with bands such as The Strokes...Alien Ant Farm...Trick Turner..The Yeah Yeah Yeahs...Lit and many more...he is a singer,drummer,guitarist,bassist,piano player,song writer,and lover.an inspiration to man kind.u can check p.c out on the playboy video game.....1 million copies sold...mo fo Prince Charming Bio Finally a true role model... Raised by wolves in the frozen tundra, it was evident at a young age Prince Charming was given to us by the gods of rock. Growing up, PC was put through a strict training program which included swimming in chummed waters through schools of great white sharks, crawling on all fours through hot coals and holding a plugged in microphone in a hot tub. When he misbehaved, he was whipped with bass guitar strings. At age 12, he was left on a deserted island 5,000 miles from civilization. PC created drums out of hollow trees and guitars out of bamboo and vines. After perfecting the play of each instrument, PC used the drums as a raft and the guitar as a paddle and he traveled the seven seas to get back to the USA. After graduating from FRU (Fairly Ridiculous University) he signed a long-term deal with the devil. In exchange for teaching the devil how to party, Prince Charming will remain on earth to jam like Mozart, joke like Seinfeld, look like Brad Pitt, and charm like Houdini. When PC is not at one of his palaces around the world, he can be found in NYC. Lock up your daughters"

Http://www.myspace.com/princecharmingrob

**Lock Jaw** · 02-17-2006, 11:46 PM

Eugene wasn't always retarded. Then he met Chuck Norris.

**Savio** · 02-18-2006, 12:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pinnacle Charisma

I think ~~some people~~ 80% of the people dont really get the meaning of this thread

**hb2k** · 02-21-2006, 08:47 PM

Jesus walked on water. Kurt Angle walked on Jesus.

**FourFifty** · 02-22-2006, 05:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hb2k

Jesus walked on water. Kurt Angle walked on Jesus with a broken freakin' neck!

Fixed

**PureHatred** · 02-22-2006, 03:23 PM

Steve Austin sleeps with a gun under the pillow. But he could kill you with the pillow.

Kurt Angle doesn't cut his grass, he stares at it and dares it to grow.

Taco Bell used to close at midnight, until Samoa Joe decided he wanted to have burritos at 2 am.

Superman has Kurt Angle pajamas.

Kurt Angle once elbowed God in the face. God apologized for the damage he had caused to Kurt's elbow.

02-15-2006, 04:25 AM	#82
FourFifty As over as Crystal Pepsi Posts: 21,639	Jim Ross created "god" the moment he said "BAH GAWD" for the first time.

02-15-2006, 04:26 AM	#83
Skippord I'm Mr. White Christmas Posts: 44,526	Chris Sabin Hasnt held all of the titles in TNA because They're slobbering over AJ's dick...Oh Wait

02-15-2006, 04:28 AM	#84
D Mac Posts: 21,603	Vince's genetic jackhammer has'nt been used in so long it needs a good dose of WD 40.

02-15-2006, 05:41 AM	#86
D Mac Posts: 21,603	It's not "Time To Play The Game", because I'm all out of quarters.

02-15-2006, 06:56 AM	#87
Pinnacle Charisma Posts: 1,981	I think some people dont really get the meaning of this thread

02-15-2006, 07:14 AM	#88
What Would Kevin Do? Ninja Mod, Esquire Posts: 12,676	Takeru Kobayashi ate 50 and a half hotdogs in 12 minutes. Viscera ate 12 asian babies in 50 and a half minutes. Viscera won. Yeah, it's stolen, but still hilarious.

02-15-2006, 08:24 AM	#89
Londoner One Of A Kind Posts: 22,178	According to Vince, the saying isn't 'If it ain't broken, don't fix it'..it's.... 'if it's fixed, then brake it'.

02-15-2006, 05:51 PM	#91
Kane Knight Ron Paul 4 EVA Posts: 152,467	Gilberg has counted to infinity--Twice. Gilberg's hair isn't receeding, his hair fears being seen by him. Gilberg invented the C-Section when he jobbed to his mom's uterus.

02-15-2006, 06:42 PM	#92
Nowhere Man Now. Here. Man. Posts: 8,370	If you cut Hulk Hogan, he bleeds pure HGH

02-15-2006, 06:45 PM	#93
Xero He's Here Posts: 60,735	Oranges were derived from three different things. Lemons for the citrus, Hulk Hogan for the orange, and Triple H for that sting that happens if it goes into your eye.

02-16-2006, 02:32 AM	#94
D Mac Posts: 21,603	If Rikishi's ass was any bigger, it would have it's own zip code.

02-16-2006, 02:49 AM	#95
FourFifty As over as Crystal Pepsi Posts: 21,639	During a trip to New York RVD made a 1,000 dollar bet with Superman. The deal was that he can break the earth's pull before Superman can. After RVD won the bet he went out and bought some killer weed because nobody gets higher than Rob Van Dam.

02-16-2006, 03:17 AM	#97
Corkscrewed Posts: 18,357	Brock Lesnar once F-5'ed a kid from New York all the way to Ohio--all through his computer!

02-16-2006, 03:59 AM	#98
Skippord I'm Mr. White Christmas Posts: 44,526	Chris Sabin Eats thunder and craps lightning

02-16-2006, 04:07 AM	#99
D Mac Posts: 21,603	Tatanka speared Goldberg with a spear before Goldberg could spear Tatanka.

02-16-2006, 02:57 PM	#100
FourFifty As over as Crystal Pepsi Posts: 21,639	Tim White isn't trying to kill himself. He's just calling death a pussy.

02-16-2006, 03:27 PM	#101
Anybody Thrilla Cranky Kong Posts: 78,671	Shawn Michaels and Captain Charisma were slated to have a blockbuster feud that would have revitalized wrestling as we know it. In the end, however, Michaels refused to go through with the program. When asked why, he simply said "I don't hit Christians".

02-16-2006, 05:03 PM	#102
Lock Jaw Skibbidy Lock Jaw Posts: 88,904	The Big Show and Jim Ross once ate the entire nation of China. They were hungry again in an hour. True story.

02-16-2006, 05:07 PM	#103
Y2Jeremy is Brilliant Posts: 428	HHH is suing God, claiming that He stole the "Almighty" gimmick from his finisher, The Pedigree.

02-16-2006, 05:16 PM	#104
Xero He's Here Posts: 60,735	Triple H is what God would be if he were dog food. He's been inside every dog at least once.

02-17-2006, 01:48 PM	#105
Y2Jeremy is Brilliant Posts: 428	Stone Cold doesn't beat women, he teaches them to fight through examples.

02-17-2006, 01:54 PM	#106
Xero He's Here Posts: 60,735	On the 7th day, God didn't rest, he created Stacy Keibler's legs.

02-17-2006, 02:33 PM	#107
D Mac Posts: 21,603	When God created Goldust he did'nt just break the mold, it "shattered".

02-17-2006, 05:22 PM	#109
Xero He's Here Posts: 60,735	A-Train enjoies long walks in the woods. He also claims to be very photogenic, but only from the side.

02-17-2006, 06:03 PM	#110
Kane Knight Ron Paul 4 EVA Posts: 152,467	Geroge Bush sat for 7 minutes after he was informed of an attack on 9-11 only because he feared Muhammed Hassan was coming for him.

02-17-2006, 06:23 PM	#112
Kane Knight Ron Paul 4 EVA Posts: 152,467	The Big Bang occurred when Bret Hart and Kurt Angle decided the Universe wasn't big enough for the two of them.

02-17-2006, 06:28 PM	#113
FourFifty As over as Crystal Pepsi Posts: 21,639	Unknown to most wrestling fans Barry Horwitz was once a boxer. The legendary jobber made it a point to put Glass Joe over.

02-17-2006, 06:41 PM	#114
Kane Knight Ron Paul 4 EVA Posts: 152,467	Ben Stein stole his monotone gimmick from Lance Storm.

02-17-2006, 07:03 PM	#115
FourFifty As over as Crystal Pepsi Posts: 21,639	Doesn't deal with wrestling, but I read this and thought of this thread. "Prince Charming has played with bands such as The Strokes...Alien Ant Farm...Trick Turner..The Yeah Yeah Yeahs...Lit and many more...he is a singer,drummer,guitarist,bassist,piano player,song writer,and lover.an inspiration to man kind.u can check p.c out on the playboy video game.....1 million copies sold...mo fo Prince Charming Bio Finally a true role model... Raised by wolves in the frozen tundra, it was evident at a young age Prince Charming was given to us by the gods of rock. Growing up, PC was put through a strict training program which included swimming in chummed waters through schools of great white sharks, crawling on all fours through hot coals and holding a plugged in microphone in a hot tub. When he misbehaved, he was whipped with bass guitar strings. At age 12, he was left on a deserted island 5,000 miles from civilization. PC created drums out of hollow trees and guitars out of bamboo and vines. After perfecting the play of each instrument, PC used the drums as a raft and the guitar as a paddle and he traveled the seven seas to get back to the USA. After graduating from FRU (Fairly Ridiculous University) he signed a long-term deal with the devil. In exchange for teaching the devil how to party, Prince Charming will remain on earth to jam like Mozart, joke like Seinfeld, look like Brad Pitt, and charm like Houdini. When PC is not at one of his palaces around the world, he can be found in NYC. Lock up your daughters" Http://www.myspace.com/princecharmingrob

02-17-2006, 11:46 PM	#116
Lock Jaw Skibbidy Lock Jaw Posts: 88,904	Eugene wasn't always retarded. Then he met Chuck Norris.