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Old 12-23-2004, 12:19 PM   #1
PorkSoda
Diabetes Coming To Getcha
 
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That Home Alone reference was hilarious

Scene: Everyone in the WWE locker room is standing behind a door. Suddenly, footsteps are heard. They have balloons set up, a huge cake, food stands, drinks, everything. Suddenly, the door opens.

Everyone: SURPRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISE!!!!!

Everyone notices that Lita is standing in the door, not Lesnar.

Vince: Just ignore her, its only Lita, its only Lita.

Lita: Yeah, only me, only me.

Lita enters the room, forgetting to close the door. Lita suddenly botches walking and falls down, everyone tends to help her up, as soon as this happenes, Lesnar enters. Shane sees Lesnar.

Shane: Oh hey...surprise.

Vince+Linda: SUrprise.

Angle+Big Show+Luther: SUrprise.

Lita: Surprise!

Vince: (In tears to Lita) We wasted the good surprise on yew!

(30 minutes later)

Lesnar: Vince, it was a great surprise, I was totally shocked!
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Old 12-23-2004, 12:35 PM   #2
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*Brock enters the room with everyone in there

Brock: Hey guys it's me! Brock!

Taker: Yeah hey whatever... so Vince about the PPV.

Brock: Umm Show remember me.

Show: yeah whatever hey Test. So Angle, about our match how you wanna do it. Wiat a minute I thought you were fired Test?

Brock: I'm not Test I'm...

Show: Yeah whatever.

*The Rock shows up

Rock: Finally the Rock has come back home.

*Everyone turns around and pushes Brock out of the way.

Vince; So Rock how's it going.
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Old 12-29-2004, 07:11 PM   #3
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Old 12-29-2004, 08:30 PM   #4
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WWE New Year's Resolutions
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Old 12-29-2004, 08:37 PM   #5
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RVD: I won't take anyomre drugs.

10....9....8....7.....6...5.....4....3....2...1...happy new year!!!!!

RVD: This calls for a special occasion.
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Old 12-29-2004, 08:46 PM   #6
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HHH: This yeah I plan on jobbing at least once at least once. I also plan to be a comediain also. Haaa I crack myself up.

Vince: This year I plan on allowing the talent to really shine. Show their true skills.

HHH: You plan on bein a comedian too.

Vince: Yeah how was that?

HHH: Brilliant.
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Old 12-29-2004, 09:29 PM   #7
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Bob Holly (talking with some guys): My resolution for next year to be a nicer person and to be a good friend to all my fellow workers, no matter what they have don--

DuPree: Um, Bob, can I ask you for some--

Holly: What's today's date there, buddy?

DuPree: Um, it's Dec-- **Holly beats down Rene, Godfather style, and then some with a steel chair to the face and random steel steps to the back**

Holly: ... **points to Booker T** ..he did it. **runs away**
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Old 12-29-2004, 10:36 PM   #8
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Heidenreich: "I resolve to read more of my poems because the fans seem to really enjoy them."
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Old 12-30-2004, 12:31 AM   #9
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That was funny in a random way.
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Old 12-30-2004, 01:17 AM   #10
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Shadow got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Shadow got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Shadow got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Shadow got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Shadow got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Shadow got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Shadow got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Shadow got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Shadow got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Shadow got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Shadow got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Shadow got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)
Jeff Jarret: I resolve to not hit anybody else with these god damn cardboard guitars. I mean, they don't even hurt! *hits himself with one and over sells it*
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Old 12-30-2004, 04:55 AM   #11
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Kevin Nash: My new year's resolution is to not tear my quad!

(An hour later.)

Everyone: 10! 9! 8! 7! 6! 5! 4! 3! 2! 1! Happy new year!

Kevin: Happy new year every- OH GOD MY QUAD!
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Old 12-30-2004, 01:59 PM   #12
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Undertaker: my new years resolution is to learn how to sell

Several hours of drinking later Undertaker proceeds to no sell:

Being Pissed
Falling from a 3 story building
3 frog splashes from Eddie Guererro
Alcohol poisoning
A mugging
Being hit by a truck
Death himself
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Old 12-30-2004, 02:31 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by juanker
Undertaker: my new years resolution is to learn how to sell

Several hours of drinking later Undertaker proceeds to no sell:

Being Pissed
Falling from a 3 story building
3 frog splashes from Eddie Guererro
Alcohol poisoning
A mugging
Being hit by a truck
Death himself
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Old 12-30-2004, 03:04 PM   #14
PorkSoda
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JR: My New Years Resolution is to call a match and all the moves correctly.

(Fast forward to Wrestlemania '05. Randy Orton hits the RKO on Triple H)
JR: Rock Bottom!
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Old 12-30-2004, 04:00 PM   #15
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Kidman: "I think for my New Year's Resolution I should try something I've never done before. For 2005 I will not injure anybody with my sloppy version of the Shooting Star Press. Aw, who am I kidding?"
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Old 12-30-2004, 03:38 PM   #16
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Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)
Lita: My new Year's revolution is to not botch anything this year.


*Fast Forward to the first raw of 2005*

Lita's music hits

Lita runs out on the stage carrying the IC title and then while walking down the ramp falls down Ultimo_style.
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Old 12-30-2004, 04:28 PM   #17
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Jerry Lawler: My new year's resolution is to not say "puppies" as much.

(Vince walks up.)

Vince: I overheard your resolution, and you'll definitely not be saying "puppies" anymore!

Jerry: What?

Vince: I'm turning you gay!

Jerry: ....

Vince: Glad you're happy!

JR (Out of nowhere): BAH GAWD DONG!!
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Old 01-06-2005, 12:14 PM   #18
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Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)
I'm going to keep this going as I find it funny some of the stuff that has gone through here.






What Vince want's Abyss to do in his first storyline if he signs with WWE.
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Old 01-06-2005, 06:18 PM   #19
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U gotta do the topic in size 7 dummy.

VINCE: "For your first match, you're gonna wrestle my friend Bob Holly. Oh, and here's some insurance. And a list of nearby hospitals. And a card that'll get you a 20% off spinal surgery. And a lollipop for being a good boy."
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Old 01-06-2005, 06:24 PM   #20
wwe is neat
 
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Fight HHH
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Old 01-06-2005, 06:52 PM   #21
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wwe is neat
Fight HHH
^ Doesn't get the concept of this game.
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Old 01-06-2005, 06:34 PM   #22
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Vince: You're going to be the #30 entrant in the Royal Rumble. You will win the Royal Rumble, have the decision over turned, and be sent down to Heat never to be heard from again.

Abyss: .... O... kay?

Vince: I'm KIDDING! You'll be seen four, maybe five times a year on Raw!
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Old 01-06-2005, 10:13 PM   #23
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VINCE: I'm so excited about your new push, Brock.
ABYSS: I'm Abyss.
VINCE: I think you'll fit in very well here, Brock.
ABYSS: I'm Abyss.
VINCE: Of course you are, Brock. Now, Brock, who do you want to fight...Brock?
ABYSS: [sobbing] I'm not Brock! I wish I could be!
[Runs out of the room, crying]

Rep for the reference
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Old 01-06-2005, 10:24 PM   #24
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Quote:
Originally Posted by loopydate
VINCE: I'm so excited about your new push, Brock.
ABYSS: I'm Abyss.
VINCE: I think you'll fit in very well here, Brock.
ABYSS: I'm Abyss.
VINCE: Of course you are, Brock. Now, Brock, who do you want to fight...Brock?
ABYSS: [sobbing] I'm not Brock! I wish I could be!
[Runs out of the room, crying]

Rep for the reference
The Critic. Specifically when Roger and Ebert broke up and Jay replaced one of them with the other. I belive...this one is Ebert's replacement joke.
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Old 01-06-2005, 10:53 PM   #25
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Gerwitz: Hey Abyss welcome to RAW!
Abyss: Thank Paul, I'm happy to be in the big leagues
Gerwitz: We've seen more matches with guys like AJ Styles, simply awesome, now if you can carry HHH to a solid match, around the 20 minute mark Flair will interfere and HHH will pin you, but your heat will still be intact
*Kane walks by and hears conversation*
Kane: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, thats a good one, keep your heat, I need to write that down
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Old 01-07-2005, 02:14 AM   #26
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**Vince is sitting at a desk in his office with a clipboard and pen in his hand. Abyss walks in**

Vince: Ahh, new guy, your just the person I wanna see.

Abyss: Well thank you Vince for this oppurtunity to be in the WWE

Vince: No problem. OK, I'm gonna ask you a few questions before I send you on the road, just so I know where to send your character.

Abyss: OK, sounds easy enough.

Vince: OK, first question. Who is your favourite WWE superstar?

Abyss: Well, I'd have to say Chris Benoit.

**Vince looks at his clipboard under the first question. There are 2 boxes. "Triple H" and "Other". Vince ticks "Other"**

Vince: OK, thats all the questions done.

**Vince grabs a box full of stuff from under his desk and hands it to Abyss**

Vince: Right, heres your wig, cheerleader uniform, makeup and hair accercories. You're going to be from the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders, lose to Lita 5 times, then driven off a cliff by Kane, and have your dead body raped by Triple H. Any questions?

Abyss: Hasnt half this storyline happened be...

Vince: OK Great, Have Fun!
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Old 01-07-2005, 04:10 AM   #27
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*Abyss walks into Trip....I mean Vince McMahon's office.*

Vince: Hello Abyss.

Abyss: Hello Mr. McMahon sir.

Vince: We're thinking of having you debut on RAW with a unique gimmick.

Abyss: If it isn't a problem, I'd rather go to SmackDown! sir.

Vince: What the Hell is SmackDown!? A cruiserweight?

Abyss: No sir, it's your second wrestling show.

Vince: You mean Heat?

Abyss: No...UPN.....Thursdays....ring a bell?

Vince: ...........On RAW this is what you're going to do....

*Later that night on RAW.*

JR: BAHGAWD KING! RATTLESNAKE! AUSTIN! STUNNER!

King: That's a crossbody by Hurricane on Rob Conway, JR.

*Abyss appears on screen in superhero attire.*

Abyss: I.....am Captain Ihateamerico

JR: BAHGAWD! LOVE IT OR LEAVE IT, KING! THE ORDASITY! SUPLEX ON THE STEEL!!!!!!!
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Old 01-07-2005, 11:46 AM   #28
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PorkSoda puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)PorkSoda puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)PorkSoda puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)PorkSoda puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)PorkSoda puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)PorkSoda puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)PorkSoda puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)PorkSoda puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)PorkSoda puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)
Abyss: You may he happy now Kane with Lita...but just how happy is...Sandra Pick??!?!?!
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Old 01-07-2005, 03:33 PM   #29
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PorkSoda
Abyss: You may he happy now Kane with Lita...but just how happy is...Sandra Pick??!?!?!
^ LOL Her name was Katie Vick.
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Old 01-07-2005, 11:56 AM   #30
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Vince: Okay Abyss, I have the perfect angle for you! You see, you will go under the ring to find a weapon during a match and pull out, get this, a dildo! Then you will bitch slap your opponent with it, pin him, and afterwards make sweet, sweet love to it on air.

Abyss: WHAT!?

Vince: Just do it, I'm trying to get out of my contract with Viacom.
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Old 01-07-2005, 03:16 PM   #31
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1000 pts to Alienoid


If other wrestlers besides Cena had their own custom belts.
Last edited by Corkscrewed; 01-07-2005 at 03:36 PM.
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Old 01-07-2005, 03:21 PM   #32
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Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)
*Triple H is walking around in the back. He stops in front of Chris Jericho.*

Chris: Hey man nice belt, I'll be challenging you for that at the Royal Rumble.

HHH: Yeah but look closely at the belt.

*Jericho looks closely at the belt. It has a picture of HHH on it in his "Game" face, and the underneath it is written "To my new Son-In-Law. This is your wedding gift from Linda and I. Love Vince.

Jericho: Oh

*HHH walks away laughing*
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Old 01-07-2005, 04:31 PM   #33
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(The week after winning the Tag Team belts with Rosey, The Hurricane walks past RVD.)

RVD: Woah, what's up with that belt?

Hurricane: Oh this? It's the Hurra-belt! Look! It has the hurra-cuffs, the hurra-rang, the hurra-phone card, and the S.H.I.T. attachment!

RVD: Shit attachment!? Let me see that!

(RVD goes over to Hurricane and starts to fiddle with the S.H.I.T attachment.)

RVD: *Poke Poke* I don't think you should mess with that! It's very sensi-

(The S.H.I.T. attachment activates and sprays a brown substance all over RVD.)

RVD: Woah! Shit man! I'm covered in shit!

Hurricane: I told you you shouldn't have touched it!

(Triple H walks by.)

RVD: Haha, do it to Hunter!

Hurricane: Hehe, okay...

(Seconds later, Hurricane returns with a mouth full of shit.)

Hurricane: Murf murf murf murf murf.

Triple H: ... And don't try that again!
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Old 01-08-2005, 03:27 PM   #34
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RVD Belt: RVD takes Austin's old "Smoking Skull Belt" and has a an engraver add a joint coming out of the skull's mouth. RVD renames it "the 420 Belt".
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Old 01-09-2005, 01:52 AM   #35
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wwe is neat does not have that much rep yet (10+)
John Cena having a spinning belt.
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Old 01-09-2005, 02:05 AM   #36
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Visera.....um he would need one.
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Old 01-09-2005, 02:18 AM   #37
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*Triple H is in the lockerroom with Evolution.*

Triple H: So guys, do you like my personal custom-made belt?

Batista: It looks exactly like the World Heavyweight Championship.

Triple H: Damn straight, and don't you forget it.
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Old 01-09-2005, 08:56 AM   #38
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(JBL is talking to Danny Basham.)
Danny: Kick ass belt, except the bull looks like the Brahma Bull.
JBL: It is, Rock never got to use this belt, so Vince just glued some horns onto it and viola! My new belt!
Danny: Too bad Rock never got to use it...
Big Show (walking by): Be sure not to hit me with the horns tonight dammit! You could impale me!
JBL: Okay...
(Fast forward to the end of the match.)
Big Show: OH GOD WHERE'S MY EYE!? WHERE'S MY EYE!?
JBL: Oops...
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Old 01-09-2005, 03:27 PM   #39
PorkSoda
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PorkSoda puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)PorkSoda puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)PorkSoda puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)PorkSoda puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)PorkSoda puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)PorkSoda puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)PorkSoda puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)PorkSoda puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)PorkSoda puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)
Hurricane: Rosey, Rosey, dude, check out your new belt.
Rosey: Wow thanks.............what the hell?
Hurricane directs him to a belt with shit covered all over the front of it.
Hurricane: It is SHIT! Get it?
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Old 01-10-2005, 03:44 PM   #40
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1000 pts to Xero Limit.

-2000 pts to wwe is neat for not getting it. Twice.


What happens when a TPWW member meets a WWE superstar
(ideally, this is a one-on-one meeting)
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