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Old 02-10-2006, 07:43 AM   #1921
Impact!
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Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)
Oh wait, not what they would actually say, um how about....

Vinve: we have finally come to a conclusion on why the WWE fans have been booing our champ, Mr Cena, and it is for this one reason...





He made songs with Bumpy Knuckles, so next week on RAW he's going to FU BP, then we'll fire him right there, live on tv. By god I'm a genious, someone get me a victory twinkie.

Hunter: Sure thing dad...SHANE GET ME A GOD DAMN VICTORY TWINKIE

Vince: That's my boy

Shane: :foc:
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Old 02-10-2006, 08:59 AM   #1922
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Vince: It's quite obvious why people have hated Cena for so long. It's because he's stopped taking steroids! JOHN! GET IN HERE!

(2 months later...)

Cena: Holy shit I can hardly move my arms...
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Old 02-10-2006, 10:11 AM   #1923
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It's been a while, so this might not be good.
Vince: That's it! That's why Cena is getting booed.

HHH: Why dad?

Vince: Well son, it's because the fans don't wanna see Cena winning the feuds, like Cena VS Jericho or Cena VS Angle.

HHH: No?

Vince: It's because they wanna see Cena lose to you.

HHH: Yeah that sounds about right.

Vince: OK, Shawn, take a note of this.

Shane: Dad, my name is Shane.

Vince: What? Paul, your name isn't Shane. So Shawn, tell the whole locker room and Cena that they'll all be jobbing to Paul.

Shane: So same as usual?

Vince: Well yeah, but tell them that they'll actually get a punch in the match this time.

HHH: DAD! No!

Vince: Oh, ok then, cancel that last part, will ya Shawn?

Shane:
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Old 02-10-2006, 03:15 PM   #1924
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Old 02-11-2006, 11:28 AM   #1925
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Vince: They're chanting "Booya Cena! Boooooya Cena!"...
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Old 02-11-2006, 01:20 PM   #1926
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It's a future kind of heat called, "John Cena heat." It's what only the best get. Infact we're trying it on our newest characters next monday.

Rob van Dam's new character: Robby V.D.

and H.H.H's= Hunter has Herpies
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Old 02-11-2006, 01:23 PM   #1927
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Vince: They're booing because it's all part of my plan! THIS PROVES THAT I CONTROL THE FANS! MWAHAHAHAHA!

*Vince walks out and cries.*
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Old 02-11-2006, 04:56 PM   #1928
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Next one could be, the WWE olympic games, like cruiserweight lifting etc.
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Old 02-11-2006, 06:22 PM   #1929
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http://www.tpww.net/columns/1092408886.html
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Old 02-11-2006, 10:44 PM   #1930
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FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)
*We see Shane backstage, glaring at Vince and HHH's matching father and son shirts, as he overhears their conversation*

Vince: So the plan is for Cena to become a HUGE face! I want the fans to scream for him! Male, female, young, old, everyone!

HHH: Sounds like a good idea to me, pops!

*Shane walks up to HHH and Vince*

Shane: Hi dad!

Vince: WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE!?!?! CAN'T YOU SEE WE'RE TALKING!!!! GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE BEFORE I FIRE YOUR ASS!!!!

HHH: Yeah!

*Later, Shane walks down to the ring, and he waves his hand*

Shane: You will boo John Cena!

Fans: We will boo John Cena...

Shane: You will cheer the Boogeyman!

Fans: We will cheer the Boogeyman...

Shane: These aren't the droids you're looking for.

Fans: These aren't the droids we're looking for...
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Old 02-12-2006, 09:30 PM   #1931
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1000 pts to FourFifty and Cool King. CK would have gotten rep, but I need to spread it more.


If Wrestlers Were Involved In World History
(courtesy of PorkSoda)
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Old 02-12-2006, 09:39 PM   #1932
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Father: Did you chop down that cherry tree?
Vince Washington: No, Eric did it.
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Old 02-12-2006, 09:45 PM   #1933
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STEPHANIE MONROE: Happy Birthday... Mister President!

JOHN FITZGERALD LEVESQUE: Me likey likey!

*two weeks later*

NEWS REPORTER: In an unprecedented move, President Levesque has just abolished the standard four year presidential term and made it forty years instead...
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Old 02-12-2006, 09:51 PM   #1934
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Bill Copeland: There are many allegations being thrown around. I would like to state for the record that I did NOT sleep with my best friend's wife.

Matt Lewinsky: BULLFECES!
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Old 02-12-2006, 10:01 PM   #1935
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I'm still trying to get back in the swing of things.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Corkscrewed
CK would have gotten rep, but I need to spread it more.
I'll remember that.

Kip Hankcock: There, we've signed the Declaration Of Wrestlependence!

Christian Jefferson: We're free from the hated WWE!

Benedict Helmsley: Um, hey guys.

B.G Stockton: Benedict Helmsley, what to you want?

Benedict Helmsley: I was wanting to, um join TNA, and make it a free company.

Nash Franklin: Great! now if you just sign this Declaration, it'll be official.

*Nash Franklin pics up the feather and the Declaration*

Nash Franklin: OW! MY QUAD!

George Jarrett: We're under attack from that traitor! Benedict Helmsley doesn't really want to sign the Declaration, he doesn't want TNA to be a free wrestling company.

Benedict Helmsley: TNA will never get it's independence from the great WWE! Muhahahahahahahaha!!!!!!

*Benedict Helmsley runs away*
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Old 02-12-2006, 10:02 PM   #1936
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Okay, this one's prolly pretty horrible, and I mean "only Jabba would laugh" horrible, but anyway...


Hardcore Hitler: I am implementing this Final Solution on all of Germany, because all of you must pay me your Jews!!!!
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Old 02-12-2006, 11:39 PM   #1937
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FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)
Not so much history, but...

Al Gore: I invented the internet

G.W. Lesnar: Internet? KILL!!!!!
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Old 02-13-2006, 12:07 AM   #1938
FourFifty
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FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)FourFifty got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)
Hitler: France was easy to conquer... Where was das French military commander?

*And somewhere in France, in the military commander’s bed room*

Jeff "Le Commander" Hardy:zzzzz.zzzzzz.zzzzzz....zzz.....zzzz..... *wakes up*... FUCK! I'm late!
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Old 02-13-2006, 08:10 AM   #1939
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Quote:
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Hardcore Hitler:
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Old 02-13-2006, 08:12 AM   #1940
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Corkscrewed
1000 pts to FourFifty and Cool King. CK would have gotten rep, but I need to spread it more.


If Wrestlers Were Involved In World History
(courtesy of PorkSoda)
George W. Bush = Vince McMahon

Tony Blair = Eric Bischoff

Could you imagine Eugene shaving Tone's head?
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Old 02-13-2006, 09:29 AM   #1941
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Settler McMahon: Give us your land for these smallpox-infected blankets!
Native Tatanka: .... BUFFALO!!!!!!! *Chops*
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Old 02-14-2006, 08:10 PM   #1942
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Let's do "If the media thought wrestling was real" next.
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Old 02-14-2006, 08:15 PM   #1943
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Corkscrewed
Okay, this one's prolly pretty horrible, and I mean "only Jabba would laugh" horrible, but anyway...


Hardcore Hitler: I am implementing this Final Solution on all of Germany, because all of you must pay me your Jews!!!!
Yeah I never got around to that gimmick, what with Hindenburg Hulk Hitler, and Hip Hop Hitler.
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Old 02-14-2006, 08:21 PM   #1944
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From The Book Of Mark

And when the sabbath was past, Mary Magdalene, and Mary the mother of James, and Salome had brough sweet spices, that they might come and anoint him. And very early in the morning the first day of the week, they came unto the sepulchre at the rising of the sun. And they said among themselves, Who shall roll us away the stone from the door of the sepulchre? And when they looked, they saw that the stone was rolled away: for it was very great. And entering into the sepulchre, they saw a young man sitting on the right side, clothed in a red, white, and blue singlet; and they were affrighted. And he saith unto them, "Be not affrighted: Ye seek Kurt of Angle, which was crucified: If I can win a gold medal with a broken freakin' neck, do you honestly think a couple of nails can kill me?!?!?"
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Old 02-15-2006, 01:28 AM   #1945
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Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)
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Old 02-15-2006, 02:04 AM   #1946
FourFifty
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Quote:
Originally Posted by loopydate
From The Book Of Mark

And when the sabbath was past, Mary Magdalene, and Mary the mother of James, and Salome had brough sweet spices, that they might come and anoint him. And very early in the morning the first day of the week, they came unto the sepulchre at the rising of the sun. And they said among themselves, Who shall roll us away the stone from the door of the sepulchre? And when they looked, they saw that the stone was rolled away: for it was very great. And entering into the sepulchre, they saw a young man sitting on the right side, clothed in a red, white, and blue singlet; and they were affrighted. And he saith unto them, "Be not affrighted: Ye seek Kurt of Angle, which was crucified: If I can win a gold medal with a broken freakin' neck, do you honestly think a couple of nails can kill me?!?!?"
Is it too early to say 1000 points?
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Old 02-15-2006, 03:45 AM   #1947
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President Kennedy:ASK NOT WHAT YOUR COUNTRY CAN DO FOR YOU BUT WHAT YOU CAN DO FOR YOUR COUNTRY

































...COUNTRY
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Old 02-15-2006, 03:54 AM   #1948
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ROFLMAO. yeah, 100,000 pts to loopy!!!!

CROWD:

But points don't mean a thing.


Ironic ways for wrestlers to end their careers.
You can go the death route or some career ending injury or whatever.
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Old 02-15-2006, 04:05 AM   #1949
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The Undertaker's title push was cancelled today when he was discovered unconscious at his senior citizens home today. Paramedics were unable to ressucitate him. It turns out he hadn't been dead before after all...
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Old 02-15-2006, 06:08 AM   #1950
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Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Impact! puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)
[News Reporter] And it is my sad news to inform you that WWE Superstar HHH, a.k.a Paul Levesque has suffered career ending injuries today when, whilst sky diving his parachute failed to open completely, and sent him careening through a glass roof in [insert american town here].
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Old 02-15-2006, 09:00 AM   #1951
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News Reporter: Late last night, during a World Wrestling Entertainment event in Chicago, Jim Ross, better known as "JR", was struck by lightning and killed, reportedly after screaming "BY GOD!".
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Old 02-15-2006, 05:47 PM   #1952
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BOOGEYMAN: And I'm gonna getch--HOLY CRAP A GIANT CENTIPEDE!!!
***SCARF!!***
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Old 02-15-2006, 05:52 PM   #1953
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Nash (To Shawn): So I told Hunter that *SNAP* OW!... OH MY GOD MY LEG IS GONE! ZACH GET BACK HERE!

Zach: NO! I NEED THIS FOR THE IMPLANT!

*Nash falls over trying to chase after him.*
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Old 02-15-2006, 05:52 PM   #1954
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Angle's neck cracks in two.
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Old 02-15-2006, 06:51 PM   #1955
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Tonight on 20/20:

We look into the life and tragic death of Ugandan professional wrestler, Kamala. Kamala was a simple man, whose cannibalistic tendencies turned his customs into tragic irony. After spending all of his life headhunting and eating his victims, he finally met his match. Late last Monday evening, Kamala was stalking a young woman after a RAW show. Unfortunately, it was too dark and Kamala mistook his quarry. After he killed the young lady and began devouring her flesh, he looked at her face and realized he had just eaten the flesh of professional wrestler Amy Dumas, aka Lita. Within a half hour, Kamala contracted every known sexually transmitted disease, and 3 that had yet to be discovered. After spending 3 days in intensive care, the Ugandan Giant finally succumbed to the ravaging viruses. Nobody has ever suffered a more painful, grueling death. May God have mercy on your soul Kamala.

Kamala the Ugandan Giant (1952(?)-2006)
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Old 02-15-2006, 06:58 PM   #1956
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Old 02-15-2006, 07:04 PM   #1957
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Vince McMahon (Overdubbed on a Shawn Michaels video): Ladies and gentlemen, it brings us great sadness to announce that Shawn Michaels, devoted husband, father, and Christian, and one of wrestling's greatest performers, has lost his smile. Because of this, he will be hanging up the old wrestling chaps and is retiring. We wish Shawn Michaels the best in his future. We will miss you, Shawn. You and your smile which has brought happiness and joy to millions of fans. The sun shall never shine again because the fans, your friends, and especially me, will never see your smile again.

(Still frame of Shawn Michaels smiling)
RIP
Shawn Michaels' Smile
1997-2006
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Old 02-16-2006, 02:19 AM   #1958
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Y3J
Angle's neck cracks in two.
Perhaps you didn't get it the first 1950 times. You're supposed to create a scene, not just give a listed example. Read the first post again.
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Old 02-16-2006, 03:43 AM   #1959
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Reporter: Former WWE Wrestler Tatanka was arrested today after scalping his boss Vince McMahon.

When asked why he did this Tatanka said, "Well, Vince said I need to further my character by attacking an enemy in the way of a Native American.
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Old 02-16-2006, 08:34 AM   #1960
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Reporter: Nick Dinsmore, better known to wrestling fans around the world as the lovable "Eugene", was forced to retire today after a doctor discovered that a concussion he had suffered a few weeks back has made him mentally challenged.

Eugene had been playing a mentally challenged wrestler for two years now. When Vince McMahon, leader of the WWF, noticed that Eugene was "in character" every moment of every day, he sent him to a neurologist, where the docter was quoted as saying "I'm sorry Mr. McMahon, he's a full-blown retard now". The Dinsmore family does plan to sue the World Wrestling Federation Entertainment.
Last edited by Xero; 02-16-2006 at 08:46 AM.
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