RAW Captions - 03/09/09 [Archive]

View Full Version : RAW Captions - 03/09/09

Xero

03-12-2009, 12:42 PM

Sorry for the delay.

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/001.jpg
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Xero

03-12-2009, 12:42 PM

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Xero

03-12-2009, 12:43 PM

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Hunter: ORTON! I'm here... to... Why the fuck is the door made of cardboard?

BigDaddyCool

03-12-2009, 12:49 PM

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/083.jpg

Randy: ...Penis this big.

Ms. Orton: Its true.

BigDaddyCool

03-12-2009, 12:50 PM

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HHH: Who the fuck are you and what are you doing in Orton's house? Why are you ruining my scene?

That guy: I'm just as shocked as you, please don't kill me.

BigDaddyCool

03-12-2009, 12:52 PM

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Hornswoggle is actually standing slightly behind Rey.

Xero

03-12-2009, 12:52 PM

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Try as he might, Kofi couldn't reach the briefcase. If only he were as tall as Andre the Giant and had a jet pack.

Nicky Fives

03-12-2009, 05:05 PM

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Flair: Stop smiling kid, I banged your mom. I could be your father.

Lock Jaw

03-12-2009, 10:46 PM

You know the drill.

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Shawn Michaels was revealed as the vocalist for Santino Marella's theme song.

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Shawn's Shirt: OM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM

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Taker: Shadow Puppet Powers Activate! Form of a dog!
Shawn: :|

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Shawn: I challenge you... to a hairline receding contest!

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JBL: WHY MUST I ALWAYS GET THINGS STUCK UP THERE?!!!

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Melina: I don't know what you're talking abou-
Maryse: You are part of the Rebel Alliance AND a traitor!

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Hammock Fail.

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Refs gotta keep his eyes peeled so he can report to Ryan Clark later on.

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FOOD GOES IN HERE!!

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A lively debate on what Xero's new sig will be has Edge mystified. Big Show remains calm though.

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What me worry?

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Kofi sends up a bribe to Sheriff Wrestlemania Sign.

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Flair: That's right! I've still got game! BOOM!

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Snuffleupagus?

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Why aren't you in the kitchen making me a 'sammich?

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ALRIGHT!! PIZZA HUT IS HERE!!!

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Little Billy's HHH Robot finally arrived in the mail.

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Rape. Don't try this at home.

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Tell me of this post-office and I may ease your suffering!

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/092.jpg
*sigh* Time to earn the paycheck....

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Spike TV circa 2004: Vince, I'm not sure we like the direction WWE Confidential is going in.
Vince: Why? I thought you were supposed to be the Men's Network.

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The police stop, but drive away when they find out HHH is a wrestler, and anything wrestlers do to each other is legal.

Cuzziebro

03-12-2009, 11:07 PM

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Randy: Shhh

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Randy: I think I hear him.

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Randy: OMG OMG OMG..... SANTA

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HHH: Hereeeesss Hunnnttteerrrrr

interforce

03-12-2009, 11:26 PM

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Ceiling Hunter is watching you masturbate

RatedGSuperstar

03-13-2009, 12:54 AM

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Cena: Sorry, but...Spoiler: Cena wins.

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Kofi: Holy shit! Ric Flair knows who I am!

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Hunter: This is going to sound crazy, but I feel like I've masturbated to you before. Do I know you?

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/090.jpg
Hunter: I can't believe Steph is making us shoot this garbage.

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/009.jpg
HBM: Michelle McCool is such a fugly tramp.
http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/010.jpg

The Mackem

03-13-2009, 12:56 PM

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J-E-DOUBLE F, J-A-DOUBLE R-E-DOUBLE T - AINT I GREAT?!

The Mackem

03-13-2009, 01:00 PM

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Edge: And that's when she unzipped her trousers. I swear if Matt had told me that she had one, I'd have went nowhere near her. I can still smell the cheese. It...keeps me awake at night.

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/036.jpg

I swore it would never happen again but then came along Vickie Guerrero!!

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/039.jpg

Dude, you're on the road to recovery, just stay away from Nicole Bass.

The Mackem

03-13-2009, 01:01 PM

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Triple A's career change to pizza deliveryman confirmed everything he had ever seen in porn movies.

The Mackem

03-13-2009, 01:04 PM

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Orton: Do what you want to my wife, just don't hurt my freshly mowed lawn!

The Mackem

03-13-2009, 01:05 PM

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/032.jpg

Hey blondie how many of these girls have you had?

03-13-2009, 01:53 PM

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Taker: Yo Momma so fat that Jesus Christ thought her mother was a lesser virgin than yours.
Shawn: :'(
Crowd: oooooOOOOOOOOOoooooo....

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Shawn: Yo Momma...

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Taker: My Momma dead homie!

Nowhere Man

03-13-2009, 01:55 PM

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Shawn is still in denial about how his audition for Oklahoma! went.

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He couldn't even bring himself to look at Taker, who got the lead role instead of him.

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Taker: Sorry, Shawn--I've just been doing cowboy schtick a lot longer than you have.

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/011.jpg

JBL should have known better than to suck on a whole lemon before his match.

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/012.jpg

CM Punk shows the world why he's the WWE Belching-Contest Champion.

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/013.jpg

Few things mortified JBL more than having someone play "This Little Piggy" with him in public.

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/014.jpg

JBL discovers, to his frustration, that CM Punk is not, in fact, a Phantom-of-the-Opera-style pipe organ.

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/016.jpg

Punk holds on for dear life after getting his foot caught in the invisible snare trap.

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/017.jpg

JBL finds himself in a dangerous predicament, having to wrestle CM Punk and hold back a sneeze.

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/023.jpg

Vince: Allright, everyone who will still have a job here this time next year, take a step forward. Oop, not so fast there, errr, everyone.

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Vickie was more than happy to show everyone Step #3 of the Macarena.

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Edge, already bored with yet another Cena feud, tunes out and pretends he's at Ozzfest.

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John Cena informs Edge and Big Show that these are not, in fact, the droids they're looking for.

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Cena is just as baffled as the fans as to how he keeps getting title matches.

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Kofi uses his latent telekinesis to pull the Money in the Bank briefcase towards him.

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/062.jpg

Jericho learns the hard way not to mess with a man who can swing around on invisible vines.

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/063.jpg

Even Kofi was amazed at how high that fart had lifted him.

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/066.jpg

Where will YOU be when diarrhea strikes?

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/067.jpg

Dear God, Raw is being invaded by the undead! It's--oh wait, that's just Ric Flair.

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Kofi was easily impressed by Ric Flair's Uncle Sam impression.

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/072.jpg

Unfortunately, the reference went right over the Canadian's head.

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/075.jpg

And yet, this is still preferable to being the top star in TNA.

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Most stables don't think to include their own referee in the ranks.

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Randy Orton finds your lack of faith disturbing.

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/086.jpg

Hunter's attempt to switch Orton's brain with a monkey's was a startling success.

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/087.jpg

WWE's remake of The Shining just didn't have the same punch as Kubrick's.

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HHH: Whaddya mean 'Austin and Pillman did it better?!?!?!'

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Orton cursed having ever converted to Islam. These danged daily prayers always came at the worst time!

Xero

03-13-2009, 02:01 PM

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Big Show could hardly hold in his laughter as Edge played an invisible harp. With his dick.

03-13-2009, 02:03 PM

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/053.jpg

Big Show farts

Vickie: That is the most sexiest thing anyone has ever done to me. :'(

Edge: Now look what have you done!

Show: Wrong day to choose Indian curry for dinner.

03-13-2009, 02:06 PM

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Melina: No matter whatever you do for the rest of your career, you will never be as sexy as a diva with semi transparent tights with her black panties showing on PG programming.

03-13-2009, 02:10 PM

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Ref: Stop doing that faggot, Rourke is confirmed for Mania.

Rey: Beware of ze rumorssssss.....

The Fonz

03-13-2009, 02:12 PM

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Crowd: Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? Cena stole the cookies from the cookie jar!
Cena: Who me?
Crowd: Yes you!
Cena: Couldn't be!
Crowd: Then who?

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/070.jpg
Crowd: Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? Chris stole the cookies from the cookie jar!
Jericho: You are all a bunch of hypocrites, I stole nothing.
Crowd: Yes you!
Jericho: No, I did not you hypocrites. You are all a bunch of sheep being led by the masses.
Crowd: Then who?

ClockShot

03-13-2009, 02:12 PM

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/043.jpg

That ain't no match contract. That's Cena's next movie deal. :(

Lock Jaw

03-13-2009, 03:32 PM

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FILTHY LITTLE HOBBITS! They stole it from us!

2+2= http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/055.jpg

03-13-2009, 03:46 PM

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/055.jpg

Crowd: You had a boner! *clap clap clap clap clap* You had a boner!
Cena: I have no idea what are they talking about.

Xero

03-13-2009, 03:59 PM

Moment earlier...

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/032.jpg

Xero

03-13-2009, 04:02 PM

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/010.jpg
Michaels: All I'm saying is purple is a pretty gay color....

RatedGSuperstar

03-13-2009, 04:50 PM

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/075.jpg
Photo evidence of Christian being held back following his return to WWE.

Savio

03-13-2009, 05:02 PM

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/085.jpg

Orton: And thats why I hit-.....Who the fuck is this chick?

03-13-2009, 06:25 PM

http://s603.photobucket.com/albums/tt117/tpwwcaps/03-08-09/RAW/060.jpg

Chris: Stupid Jamaican kid make me slave.

Kofi: Stop whining white boy and boop boop boop!

Jeritron

03-13-2009, 06:27 PM

the pics of the Orton/HHH segment are just too funny