Official Raw Thread 3/30/09 LAWLER TAKES OFF THE HEADSET!

[thedamndest]

- 18-Diva Tag Team Match
- John Cena vs. Big Show
- Chris Jericho vs. Jerry “The King” Lawler

[thedamndest]

Why am I making a Raw thread? It's the last Raw before Mania. Can't hold anything back.

[thedamndest]

Official Raw Thed 3/30/09

[RatedGSuperstar]

An 18-diva tag team match? Seriously? Can't we just revert back to TV14 for that match to have Mickie James, Layla, Alicia Fox, Maryse, and Gail Kim rip their shirts off and rub each other with baby oil? At least that would be watchable.

[thedamndest]

I think it's pretty safe to say we will see some form of Undertaker, HBM, Orton, HHH, Edge, and Vickie Guerrero.

[Krimzon7]

WHATS THE SITCHES BITCHES!!! This has to be a great Raw... It has too

[KYR]

This Thed needs more KYR

[Xero]

KYR! :love:

*MARKS OUT*

[KYR]

** inhales the electricity **

[Krimzon7]

**sniffs air to see what KYR is inhaling, and gets zapped**

[Londoner]

WHATS THE SITCHES BITCHES!!! This has to be a great Raw... It has too

Don't get ya hopes up!

I'm here this week atleast, wasn't last week cause of personal stuff going on, doesn't sound like a decent card considering its the last raw before mania.:(

[KYR]

Don't get ya hopes up!

I'm here this week atleast, wasn't last week cause of personal stuff going on, doesn't sound like a decent card considering its the last raw before mania.:(

But, but...Jericho...:wtf:

[Londoner]

V 'The King'?:(

[KYR]

** takes point **

[Xero]

The card sucks but the Mania hype machine should be huge tonight.

Or they'll just say "Watch WrestleMania for Taker vs Michaels, we know that's all anyone gives a fuck about".

[Krimzon7]

THe matches aren't what I'm looking forward to. There will be all types of mayhem abound. That's what i'm looking forward to.

[Xero]

Have there even been any celebrities announced for Mania, other than Rourke being a "special guest"? Seems extremely lackluster this year.

Though Cena was in 12 rounds, so I guess that makes up for it.

[Londoner]

Have there even been any celebrities announced for Mania, other than Rourke being a "special guest"? Seems extremely lackluster this year.

Though Cena was in 12 rounds, so I guess that makes up for it.

lol

[KYR]

I'll be honest, I've never really been a fan of the "celebrity" involvement in previous WM's.

Without too much thought, the only one I really had any sort of emotion for was Tyson - with the whole build up and eventual turn and knock-out punch on HBM.

[Xero]

I'm not crazy about the involvement either, but usually they're hyping like four or five celebrities by now and it surprises me.

Though Mr T, now that was perfect. Tyson too, but to a lesser extent. Everyone else I could have lived without.

[Krimzon7]

Bur WM is the showcase of the immortals! There has to be some star power...

[Londoner]

Bur WM is the showcase of the immortals! There has to be some star power...

You forgot about Cena!!

[Krimzon7]

They were going to have Kid Rock, what happened to that? I thought we were getting musical guest. Then, this is the 25th anniversary (the more I hear it, the more upset I get over the inaccuracy) of WM. They may run down a bunch of old talent...like bringing back Trump, and Pete Rose, and stuff like that.

[Krimzon7]

You forgot about Cena!!

No, I didn't...

[Mooияakeя™]

Bugger. Didn't know THE FINK was in the HoF. Bout time. If only they let him announce all of WM25. Never gonna happen, ah well, HoF will do for him.

[KYR]

Mr T wasn't bad - I mean at least he trained and wrestled OK for someone who had no wrestling background (as such).

Plus it was the first WM, but I suppose I identify it with Liberace as the timekeeper :roll: and an obviously suffering Ali (which just made me sad).

[Xero]

If I hear "Real American" start playing at any point during Mania I am throwing my TV out the window.

[Londoner]

No, I didn't...

Oh, my bad.:shifty:

[screech]

If I hear "Real American" start playing at any point during Mania I am throwing my TV out the window.

:y:

[screech]

Aren't Kid Rock and one of the Pussycat Dolls scheduled to appear at Mania?

[Theo Dious]

Look, HHH, Kane, Edge, Kennedy, Piper, and Cena are all going to be there. How many movie stars do you want?!

[Xero]

Look, HHH, Kane, Edge, Kennedy, Piper, and Cena are all going to be there. How many movie stars do you want?!

:rofl:

[thedamndest]

Billy Gibbons of ZZ Top probably has the most celebrity appearances record for sitting in the crowd at WWE events.

[FourFifty]

This Thed needs more KYR


....GREATEST RAW THREAD EVER!!!!

[Gerard]

If I hear "Real American" start playing at any point during Mania I am throwing my TV out the window.

I shall be waiting outside to grab it in midair and pawn it.

[Xero]

I shall be waiting outside to grab it in midair and pawn it.

Good luck, because it will have been after I put my foot through it.

[Gerard]

Good luck, because it will have been after I put my foot through it.

Nothing some gaffer tape can't fix.

√

[FourFifty]

I shall be waiting outside to grab it in midair and pawn it.

And I will jump off the riser while holding my "Vintage Cena" sign that I haven't made yet.

[Xero]

√

[Gerard]

And I will jump off the riser while holding my "Vintage Cena" sign that I haven't made yet.

√

[Droford]

Jericho should get Charlie Haas to impersonate some legends for him to beat up.

[Krimzon7]

That would be hilarious!

[Gerard]

Jericho should get Charlie Haas to impersonate some legends for him to beat up.

√

[Xero]

Jericho should get Charlie Haas to impersonate some legends for him to beat up.

He should do Rourke.

[Triple Naitch]

Official Where is Juan Thread?

Official Raw is KYR Thread. Good to have you back, buddy.

[Xero]

KYR puts the R in RAW.

[Triple Naitch]

How do you think they'll try and make 12 Rounds look like a success this week? The #3 Action movie in America!

[RatedGSuperstar]

KYR puts the R in RAW.

And the KY in K-Y Jelly?

[Afterlife]

I'm going to bed; this will be the third Raw in a row that I've missed.

[thedamndest]

#1 movie starring John Cena.

[Juan]

Official Where is Juan Thread?

Official Raw is KYR Thread. Good to have you back, buddy.

Had a wild night last night, in fact I'm still not home. I'm at a friends house in Sacramento.

Also, sup KYR :love:

[Triple Naitch]

Is it the biggest debut for a WWE Films movie?

[RatedGSuperstar]

How do you think they'll try and make 12 Rounds look like a success this week? The #3 Action movie in America!

In it's opening weekend, 12 Rounds made more money than the GDP of Zimbabwe!

[thedamndest]

That's no excuse for your channel not working when I want it to.

[Londoner]

In it's opening weekend, 12 Rounds made more money than the GDP of Zimbabwe!

:eek:

[Krimzon7]

Is it the biggest debut for a WWE Films movie?

no, there was a little flick called the Rundown that pwned this shit.

[Xero]

How do you think they'll try and make 12 Rounds look like a success this week? The #3 Action movie in America!

"12 Rounds lost less money this weekend than AIG and GM combined."

[Krimzon7]

And the KY in K-Y Jelly?

Know Your Jelly!!!

[Xero]

no, there was a little flick called the Rundown that pwned this shit.

That wasn't WWE films, though. Pretty sure The Marine was the first one.

Edit: Checked Wikipeida, they co-produced Rundown as well as a few others. See No Evil was actually their first theatrical release, but The Mania of WrestleMania came before it.

[Mooияakeя™]

Does anyone still play Cole Bingo, or is this now washed up?

[Triple Naitch]

Ooooh oooh how about...The biggest opening weekend for WWE Films in over a year!

[Xero]

LOL, yeah, that probably will be it.

[Londoner]

Ooooh oooh how about...The biggest opening weekend for WWE Films in over a year!

LOL

[Xero]

10 minutes to the RAW Go-home show!

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

[ron the dial]

hey i'm here for the fun guys!

[Krimzon7]

Yes! FTR, I love Metallica's Guitar Hero's commercial.

[Xero]

Y hullo thar WEX.

[Droford]

How do you think they'll try and make 12 Rounds look like a success this week? The #3 Action movie in America!

They cant be too happy that the Rock's movie thats been a out a few weeks beat 12 Rounds.

Come to think of it, I saw that Cena challenged the Rock to a match or something. That would be huge.

[thedamndest]

"John Cena had MORE speaking lines in 12 Rounds than WWE Hall of Famer Andre the Giant did in The Princess Bride!"

[ron the dial]

i wonder if we'll have another 8-man tag involving the mitb guys. i sure hope so.

[Krimzon7]

They may just stick to the numbers that the movie grossed. Or, they could do some wack ass red carpet thing, like how they did for Austin in Condemmed.

[D Mac]

Any good streams of this?

[ron the dial]

USA

[Londoner]

i wonder if we'll have another 8-man tag involving the mitb guys. i sure hope so.

OMG

That would be sooooo good.

:wtf::shifty:

[thedamndest]

"MORE PEOPLE VOTED IN THE ONLINE SURVEY ABOUT WHY THEY DIDN'T SEE 12 ROUNDS THAN THEY DID ABOUT ANY OTHER WWE FILMS RELEASE!"

[Triple Naitch]

"John Cena had MORE speaking lines in 12 Rounds than WWE Hall of Famer Andre the Giant did in The Princess Bride!"

Yeah, but Andre saying "Anybody want a peanut" makes him look like fucking Brando compared to Cena.

[RatedGSuperstar]

Any good streams of this?

http://www.justin.tv/warpig5

[Mooияakeя™]

Reet, off to bed. I will look forward to reading ur amusing or gay-ass comments tomorrow. If it wasn't for these breaks and the time, I could prob do live. But ffs, I feel for u lot over there with those commercials.

[Droford]

12 rounds had the best box office for a straight to DVD release ever! Look for it in the Wal mart $4 bin next week!

[Corndad]

Evening Fellas. Hoping for a good one. Last one before Mania it freakin better be.

[D Mac]

http://www.justin.tv/warpig5

:y:

[FourFifty]

Just opened a beer, gonna get some food at the first break. Life is good!

[Corndad]

Oh sweet.

[RatedGSuperstar]

THE HEARSE!

[Xero]

Oh shit, Chris Benoit has returned!

[Krimzon7]

Rather ominous beginning...

[Mooияakeя™]

I do love HD though.

[Londoner]

Rather ominous beginning...

Aye.

[Krimzon7]

All hell shall break loose.

[Xero]

LOL, thought Cole was going to say "Welcome to WrestleMania"...

[Droford]

Why would you skip school for WWE? What the hell time is it where they are?

[Corndad]

A Funeral for HBK LOL Love it.

[ron the dial]

i hope undertaker comes down to the ring doing an hbm impression

[Xero]

Nice, a funeral. Maybe Bearer will make an appearance! :love:

[Londoner]

Might aswell get the crap out the way first.

[Triple Naitch]

Tiffany :love:

[Xero]

Clusterfuck cumming up.

[Corndad]

Woah a Gail Kim Sighting.

[Krimzon7]

Not a bad way to start off raw,












PISS BREAK!!!

[RatedGSuperstar]

Gail Kim! :drool:

[ron the dial]

i have been super entertained by the divas lately. i'm down with this starting the show.

[Droford]

Mark Cuban should be somewhere in the crowd with a ROH sign if they're in Dallas.

[Mooияakeя™]

Who? Who? Who? and Who? with KK, Mickey and Melina.

and shit how small is Layla? Ho yeah.

[D Mac]

Yeah, think I'll wait and download this so I can fast forward.

[Londoner]

lol

wow this sucks

[ron the dial]

lol ridiculous match

[Corndad]

Well that was finished quick lol

[Londoner]

Santino!!!!!!!

[Droford]

oh..please..

[Xero]

LOL, what? An 18 person match ends in 3 minutes!?

[Mooияakeя™]

Oh lol. Santino. In a bikini. calling it!

[Corndad]

Thank god for Santino

[Corndad]

Jack Tunney HAHAHAHAHAHA

[Mooияakeя™]

JACK TUNNEY!!! wtf

[ron the dial]

jack tunney lol

[FourFifty]

JACK TUNNEY!!!!

[Theo Dious]

...did he just say Jack Tunney?! :rofl:

[Xero]

Jack Tunney!? ROFL

[Krimzon7]

with only 4 competitors working.

Santino!!!

[Gerard]

Has there ever been that much silicone in a wwe ring before/

[Triple Naitch]

Santino: "I sucked Pat Patterson's dick and got into the Battle Royal"

[Mooияakeя™]

That's it. The new head of the internets is born JACK TUNNEY!

[HeartBreakMan2k]

Who's the chick in the blue, she's hot.

Also, lol at Jack Tunney reference.

[screech]

SANTINO

[Droford]

the Jack Tunney name drop elicits crickets chirping from the crowd..

[Mooияakeя™]

http://www.onlineworldofwrestling.com/pictures/j/jacktunney/01.jpg

[Xero]

It looks like a whore house in the ring.

[HeartBreakMan2k]

LOL, the mankini

[screech]

The girl in the blue is Tiffany, Teddy Long's assistant.

[Londoner]

lol, cole loves it

[Gerard]

Oh christ

[Xero]

the Jack Tunney name drop elicits crickets chirping from the crowd..

And mark outs from TPWW.

[ron the dial]

oh this is too fucking good

[screech]

LOL

[Corndad]

HAHAHAHAHA

[FourFifty]

OH MY FUCKING GOD!!!! ARE THEY SERIOUS!?!?!?!? AM I HIGH!?!?!??!

[Xero]

TV-PG mankini...

[HeartBreakMan2k]

LMAO off at Santino dancing!

He just secured a job for life if I were Vinnie Mac.

[Gerard]

Its like big dick johnson minus 400lbs and baby oil.

[Krimzon7]

Mantini!!! :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

[HeartBreakMan2k]

The girl in the blue is Tiffany, Teddy Long's assistant.

She is very attractive.

[ron the dial]

seriously this whole ms. wrestlemania thing has made me love santino even more. incredibly done.

[screech]

I hate Cole

[Krimzon7]

WWE worker for life.

I"m not embarrased!!!

GOd he's gold!

[Xero]

Cole looks like a chipmunk.

[ron the dial]

this recap will last longer than most (or all) matches tonight

[FourFifty]

I would wreck Steph faster than Cena goes over most of the fucking roster.

[thedamndest]

That was worth it for the Tunney reference alone.

[Krimzon7]

I quite like the work that DIbiasi and Rhodes have been doing. Need some more speaking roles, but that's nitpicking

[Xero]

Yep...

[ron the dial]

I quite like the work that DIbiasi and Rhodes have been doing. Need some more speaking roles, but that's nitpicking
for the amount of talking that is done on screen there are a lot of guys who need more mic time

[screech]

The less CAWdy speaks, the better.

[Londoner]

Gotta love Triple H's forced reactions at Steph being knocked out.

[D Mac]

Go Orton

[Krimzon7]

I would ravage steph for the milf heat. Then she takes a great ddt. I know she can take a piledriver!!!:naughty:

[RatedGSuperstar]

These Orton/HHH video packages have all been gold.

[Mooияakeя™]

Fuck. Didn't see that kiss last week. HTF did I miss that. Orton owns.

[Gerard]

Jericho and lawler, jobbing time.

[thedamndest]

HERE IT IS!

[Xero]

I would ravage steph for the milf heat. Then she takes a great ddt. I know she can take a piledriver!!!:naughty:

Of the Samoan variety?

[Londoner]

They better not cut out Jericho's entrance. :mad:

[Xero]

I wonder who will replace Lawler, because I fully expect him to get taken out.

[Triple Naitch]

Cole looks like a chipmunk.

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_0er1RsCpmdc/SGxx3uPV_wI/AAAAAAAAAk0/2SH1-wJh6e8/s320/Michael.jpg http://images4.wikia.nocookie.net/muppet/images/4/44/Rizzo1.jpg

[Krimzon7]

Fuck. Didn't see that kiss last week. HTF did I miss that. Orton owns.

That was the best part of the segment last week!




BTW, Lawler is in great shape! He could've been a great WM opponent for Jericho.

[screech]

Cena can't grow facial hair. Why does he need razors?

[Xero]

At this point I would take Jim Ross over what Jericho has at Mania.

[Gerard]

I wonder who will replace Lawler, because I fully expect him to get taken out.

Mae Young if wwe logic is anything to go by.

[Londoner]

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_0er1RsCpmdc/SGxx3uPV_wI/AAAAAAAAAk0/2SH1-wJh6e8/s320/Michael.jpg http://images4.wikia.nocookie.net/muppet/images/4/44/Rizzo1.jpg

:lol:

[Jeez]

This would be a great time for King to turn heel and become the great color guy we all know and love.

[Droford]

Cena can't grow facial hair. Why does he need razors?

maybe he shaves somewhere else?

[KYR]

wwe logic

Two words that should NEVER be used in the same sentence.

[Gerard]

When it comes crashing down .......talking about xero's tv here.

[screech]

maybe he shaves somewhere else?

:nono:

[Xero]

<s>12 ROUNDS</s> FAST AND FURIOUS PROMO!

[Xero]

When it comes crashing down .......talking about xero's tv here.

:mad:

[screech]

Finally an entrance!

[Londoner]

Break the walls doooooowwwnnnnnn

[Krimzon7]

Of the Samoan variety?

Or the muff driver...

[Xero]

*pop*

That's what Jericho's pyro sounds like.

*pop*

[thedamndest]

Jericho looks much better with his nipples.

[screech]

CORAZON DE LEON

[Xero]

LOL, it's a handicapped gauntlet match. Great, prolong the finish even more...

[Gerard]

Jerichos walking like a shaved ape. Youd think he had 24" arms the way he's walking brother.

[screech]

TYPICAL CHEAP SHOT

[Londoner]

Jericho will win at Mania then get beat down by the legends. So fucking obvious.

[Xero]

Lawler's in better shape than I thought.

[FourFifty]

I would love to see a pile driver in this match. I don't care who does it. I just want to see it.

[Gerard]

That cheap shot was enough to send lawler 45 feet apparently.

[Krimzon7]

Lawler looks good. selling Jericho's offense.

[ron the dial]

i love hearing only cole on commentary. jesus it's bad.

[FourFifty]

Lawler's in better shape than I thought.

So is KYR's wife :kiss:

[Corndad]

A Gaunlet match? Interesting. Wonder which Legends gonna do all the work in the ring?

[Xero]

Jericho looks like a midget in short tights.

[Gerard]

I would love to see a pile driver in this match. I don't care who does it. I just want to see it.


The same type of piledriver someone above wants to give steph?

[RatedGSuperstar]

WrestleMania's going to be 4 hours this year??

[Krimzon7]

If glass shatters, I will mark all over my house.

[screech]

VINTAGE KING

[Triple Naitch]

Vintage King Lawler :nono:

[Krimzon7]

BINGO!

[Londoner]

i love hearing only cole on commentary. jesus it's bad.

give him a break, he's still thinking about Santino.

[Xero]

WrestleMania's going to be 4 hours this year??

Has been for like five+ years.

[Triple Naitch]

WrestleMania's going to be 4 hours this year??

It was 4 last year too

[Droford]

A Gaunlet match? Interesting. Wonder which Legends gonna do all the work in the ring?

Probably Snuka since he still is semi active.

[screech]

Aaaaand beatdown

[Xero]

Tap.

*GLASS*

[Gerard]

Lawler must have the most unrealistic punches going, its like some sort of weird push almost.

Oh yeah and quickest submission ever.....

[Krimzon7]

his old back couldn't take it.

[Gerard]

Right legends on top of the ramp, gives jericho about 15 mins to lay a beat down before they totter down.

[Krimzon7]

please, god please, SCSM...

[KYR]

So is KYR's wife :kiss:

On a NOT totally unrelated subject - has anyone else been greeted by their wife/girlfriend/significant other after a hard day's work wearing a cling-wrap bikini? :cool:

(Yeah I know "pics or GTFO").

[Londoner]

UH OH king got his revenge, what a shock

[Corndad]

Are they seriously gonna make Jericho look weak against King?

[Gerard]

Guess whos gonna toss him into thee ring.

[FourFifty]

On a NOT totally unrelated subject - has anyone else been greeted by their wife/girlfriend/significant other after a hard day's work wearing a cling-wrap bikini? :cool:

(Yeah I know "pics or GTFO").

Yep, ya got it right. Pics or GTFO.

[screech]

Cole kinda killed that....12 ROUNDS

[Xero]

...That's it?

[FourFifty]

12 Rounds promo- Take a drink!

[Gerard]

blah well fuck that, weak ending

oh great more fucking unseen footage of that shit.

[Xero]

LOL OH NO! 12 ROUNDS!

[Londoner]

Has been for like five+ years.

Yup.

[ron the dial]

...That's it?

[CSL]

2 HOUR ACTION PACKED THRILL RIDEEEEEEEE!!! YEAH!!!

[Xero]

Vince: Your task is to take up as much air time as humanly possible. I don't care if WrestleMania is this week, this movie is more important.

[Loose Cannon]

HELLO

[Triple Naitch]

"12 Rounds debuted last Friday....."

[FourFifty]

Anyone remember when they didn't censor "bitch"?

[RatedGSuperstar]

Has been for like five+ years.

Epic fail on my part. :nono: Maybe because I usually only watch it online the Monday after.

The first half hour of this show has pretty much sucked. Not good when the best segment was the video package they've been showing for a week now.

[Gerard]

Wonder if Vince and Shane are gonna show up for the save later tonight.

[Xero]

Epic fail on my part. :nono: Maybe because I usually only watch it online the Monday after.

The first half hour of this show has pretty much sucked. Not good when the best segment was the video package they've been showing for a week now.

Yeah, this show better pick up. This does not feel like the go-home show for Mania it should be.

Well, at least we have the funeral segment to look forward to.

[screech]

Anyone remember when they didn't censor "bitch"?

Those were good times

[Xero]

Anyone remember when they didn't censor "bitch"?
I do, but those memories are slipping.

All I remember now is "JBL is Poopy" and "MAMAJUANAEXTREMEDOTCOM".

:'(

[KYR]

I remember Heidenreich's "bitch" :shifty:

[CSL]

THE GRISH!

[Gerard]

"MAMAJUANAEXTREMEDOTCOM".



You need energy tp play with torrie, or you can put the bitch in her place and make her be on top doing the work.

[Xero]

I bet there's a 12 Rounds plug here.

[screech]

EDGE

[Triple Naitch]

I miss Edge wearing shades to the ring

[CSL]

Edge in the hoooouse. The ratings just went up

[Gerard]

Edge is so cool, walking around backstage at 9.30pm wearing sunglasses...for some reason.

[Krimzon7]

Cena's primed for the triple turn. God I can feel it, and I would love to see Edge come out to some serious pops.

[ron the dial]

Edge is so cool, walking around backstage at 9.30pm wearing sunglasses...for some reason.
and the reason is that he is edge

[Londoner]

Edge is great.

[KYR]

I'm surprised they didn't make the Edge v Cena v Big Show match a "12-Round" triple threat match.

[Gerard]

and the reason is that he is edge

:rofl:

[screech]

Fuckin CAWdy

[Xero]

Cena is in super cereal mode tonight.

[Londoner]

Cawdy getting speaking time!!!!!!

[ron the dial]

rhodes and dibiase mic time. nice.

[Krimzon7]

Ask and ye shall receive!

[Fox]

CENA: "You're right and have a good plan but I'm going to say no because I don't want to win like that, even though I'm going to win either way."

God I hate Cena.