holy shit chael sonnen

[The Mask]

http://www.cagepotato.com/chael-sonnen-pleads-guilty-money-laundering-faces-20-years-jail-and-500000-fine

Chael Sonnen Pleads Guilty to Money Laundering, Faces Up to 20 Years in Jail and $500,000 Fine

Just three days into 2011 and the year is already turning out to be much worse than the last for Chael Sonnen.

The suspended UFC middleweight who is also a licensed realtor in West Linn, Oregon pled guilty of money laundering Monday in federal court.

According to the Lake Oswego Review, a U.S. Department of Justice press release sent out today states that that Sonnen "conducted a financial transaction designed to hide or disguise the ownership and control of proceeds of mortgage fraud."

You might recall that Sonnen bowed out of the race for Oregon senate house seat in June because of "a legal matter that demanded attention," -- the same legal matter that Chael told HDNet's Mike Straka that he was too busy with to deal with preparations for his CSAC hearing in December himself. Now we can understand why it took precedence over having his fighting license reinstated.

Money laundering in the U.S. carries a maximum penalty of 20 years in federal prison as well as a $500,000 fine.

His sentencing is scheduled for 11:30 a.m. March 28, which explains why he stated during his MMA Live appearance last week that he wants to fight as soon as he can when his suspension is up on March 1. He'll likely need the money.

[Ol Dirty Dastard]

lol this dude really is pure slime

[Crimson]

Crooked

[Kris P Lettus]

He was on top of the world going into the Silva fight.. Crazy how far he's fallen..

[The Show Off]

I'm curious how well lay 'n' pray works in prison.

[Next Big Thing]

Karma is a bitch.

[Savio]

Good thing Silva won. UFC would look silly with all this shit Sonnen is going through being their champ.

[The Naitch]

LOL I never trusted Sonnen

[Vastardikai]

... Wow.

[Next Big Thing]

The UFC has "frozen" his contract now.

http://www.mmafighting.com/2011/01/04/ufc-suspends-chael-sonnen/

[Nark Order]

lol. Typical politician.

[Johnny McNasty]

I'm so happy to hear this. I've never disliked anyone since I started watching MMA, but this guy is just a fucking loser. I hope his legal defense is as shitty as his submission defense, and he is given some serious hard time.

[Krimzon7]

Hate to play the race card, but if Michael Vick can get two years for dog fighting...

Chael may be having his next 20-30 fights in a shower stall with some dude named BUBBA

[Loose Cannon]

wow christ. unreal

[Next Big Thing]

Hate to play the race card, but if Michael Vick can get two years for dog fighting...

Chael may be having his next 20-30 fights in a shower stall with some dude named BUBBA

Nah. Chael's entering a guilty plea and agreeing to cooperate with authorities so he'll get a lighter sentence. Plus because Chael's crime was "white collar" instead of violent he'll end up in a minimum security federal prison with other tax evaders, frauds etc instead of rapists, murderers and drug dealers.

[Funky Fly]

Either way, he'd probably run shit in whichever prison they put him in. Not a particuarly great fighter in the UFC, but legit compared to your average crooks.

[Confused]

I'd say chances are we'll see him in UFC again before long.

Who was he due to fight when his suspension was lifted?

[MoFo]

Mike Goldberg on the mic, introducing the event. Afterwards, a catchy lead-in video brings Chael Sonnen to the stage. Transcribed below are some of the middleweight contender's best one-liners.

On Anderson Silva vs. Yushin Okami: "It's a tough sell. We have to convince people that Anderson has a chance."

"Yushin's better than that guy... Anderson cheated during the first fight."

On Black House: "I'll fight the bowels of society, I'll take on Black House."

"As a personal service, I will personally burn Black House down."

"They only use Portuguese in parts of the world that don't matter."

On his fight with Anderson Silva: "It was the night when I won the middleweight championship."

"Triangle chokes are the refuge of cowards."

"Anderson's ribs have the same problem as his hands and feet: they're attached to a wimp."

Says, 'UFC must be Anderson Silva's dietician. He must have a lycopene deficiency after they fed him so many tomato cans.'

Would he rather fight Yushin or Silva: Says, 'it doesn't matter, I am the UFC champion.'

On Machida: "I was trying get a bunch of attention and get an easy match."

On Tito Ortiz vs. Rashad Evans: "This fight is such a big deal. The most decorated light heavyweight of all-time... is taking on Rashad Evans who has the greatest record in light heavyweight history... Hall-of-famer vs. hall-of-famer

"When Randy Couture retired they should have just done away with the whole light heavyweight weight class."

On Fedor: "How's Fedor? Is he OK? Did anybody wake him up yet."

On steroids: "We should open up an all-steroids league, and let the games begin."

On Brian Stann: "I wrote him in as the president of the united states in 2008."

On Mirco "Cro Cop": "That guy has been dropped more times than the ball in Times Square."

On Quinton "Rampage" Jackson trash-talking him: "I speak three languages and still couldn't understand what he said."

"If he wants to walk his ass to the Octagon, I'll happily kick it for him."

On Brock Lesnar: "We should all be thankful for Brock. Keep him in your thoughts. He has some real battles."

On himself: "I would give Hitler an ass-whopping. I would love to go a couple rounds with Osama bin Laden, and the guy that cut me off in traffic and woke up my dog Mr. Waffles."

"I am 217 pounds of muscle, steel and sex appeal, ladies and gentleman."

"I am a brilliant man. It is something that has plagued me for my entire life."

"I'm not in the business of selling a fight."

Says, 'I emulate Dan Henderson, Randy Couture, and Matt Lindland.'

Political aspirations: Says, 'I got in hot water, so I will have to run for a senate seat instead of a house seat.'

Miscellaneous: "Fighters have terrible taste in women, but Carwin married way out of his league."

"If you want to get cut from UFC, be rude to a fan in front of Dana White and Joe Silva."


:rofl:

He also said he failed his drug test for high testosterone because he is 'too macho for the UFC'

[MoFo]

court at a Q&A session for UFC Fight Club fans in advance of weigh-ins for Saturday's UFC 133, Sonnen seemed to know the question – "What does he think of them?" – was on its way.

"There's two things you can do," he said. "If somebody does steroids, you can kick him out and throw him away forever. Or, you can just open up an all-steroid league and let the games begin.

"Put it in your body, don't put it in your body, one-on-one, two-on-one, five-on-one, I'll make sure they all need nine-one-one."

But that wasn't the last of questions related to his thoughts on illicit testosterone. Another fan asked simply what happened in California, obviously referencing Sonnen's troubles with the state's athletic commission, which began when he tested positive for elevated levels of the hormone following his unsuccessful bid at champ Anderson Silva's title at UFC 117.

Sonnen didn't miss a beat.

"Well, they elected a liberal as governor. They had no way of knowing because he ran as a Republican, and he bankrupted the state, banged his nanny, had a kid – retired," he said to laughs all around. "Why are you asking me about that? That's a weird question for an MMA event?

"Are you talking about the night that I won the middleweight championship and they tarnished and took it from me after I whipped a man's ass for 25 minutes – he wraps his legs around my head for eight seconds and they declare him the winner? Is that what you're asking me about?

"Because I'll tell you man, it was a scene. It happened in the Bay Area, and that crowd, they were right down the middle. You had every sprite that could sashay across the bridge from San Francisco chanting, 'Anderson, Anderson,' and you had every gangster in Oakland chanting my name. By the end of the night, the sprites and the gangsters had united, and they were all cheering for your man."

By now, that kind of answer can be considered classic Sonnen. But the fighter didn't stop there, even though his management, the UFC, and possibly state regulators would have liked him to have done so.

"Is that what you're talking about?" he prattled on. "Are you talking about the injustice they did to me over the past seven months?

"My phone rings, they call me up and say, 'Chael, your testosterone level is too high.' I say, 'Well, how high was it?' They say, '0.7.' I said, 'What's normal?' They say, '0.6.' I said, 'One-tenth? You're telling me I'm one-tenth higher than the average man? Re-test that – you must have caught me on a low day.'"

"I told them to feast their eyes and fantasize – I offer no apology. That's testosterone, ladies and gentleman. And on top of that, what do you mean, higher than the norm? Who are you comparing me to? The pink t-shirt wearing earring guy I just fought?

"They said, 'Well, Mr. Sonnen, what are you telling us?' I said, 'Isn't it obvious what I'm telling you? Chael Sonnen is too goddamn macho for the standardized testing procedures of the California State Control Board."

Sonnen, of course, was cleared to fight in late June after serving a second, two-plus month suspension issued by the California State Athletic Commission for giving what the commission said was inconsistent statements about his testosterone use, as well as behaving in a manner that represented a dishonor to MMA.

Those are facts on the record. For Sonnen, though, they were little more than a backdrop to rouse the crowd.

Now, if all future Sonnen interviews were preceded by a legal disclaimer, everyone might be a bit more happy.

[Jordan]

Fucking awesome

[Super V]

I'm a fan of his, but someone needs answer all his trash talk with "Shut up, you're balls don't even work the right way."

[Reavant]

<iframe width="640" height="390" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/U5VB2hvlAsc" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

[Innovator]

sonnench chael sonnen
@bigfootsilva, I want to tell you a joke so funny it will make your head grow. It goes like this..Oh wait, I see you have already heard it.
4 Sep

[CSL]

lolll

[Funky Fly]

What's his problem with Brazilians?

[weather vane]

lol he is so mint

[Funky Fly]

Kinda hope when they eventually hold a show in Japan, they put him in an open weight fight with Bigfoot or Big Nog. I just wanna see him back up his trash talk once.

[CSL]

I wouldn't even call it trash-talk, he's essentially just playing pro wrestling heel with how ridiculous a lot of the stuff is. I mean, it's pretty much a bunch of completely absurd statements to get attention sprinkled with the occasional gem (like the above tweet)

[The Mask]

"You tell Anderson Silva I'm coming over and I'm kicking down his backdoor and patting his little lady on the ass and I'm telling her to make me a steak, medium-rare just how I like it."

[CSL]

(and the above mentioned quote)

If he ever gets dropped by Dana, he could make millions with Vince

[Next Big Thing]

http://i.imgur.com/sKovU.png (http://imgur.com/sKovU)

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Sonnen is hilarious.

[Kris P Lettus]

"Ok, then we can continue.."

LOL

[CSL]

lol he could not be playing up the pro-wrestling heel role more if he was wearing feather boas and had Bobby Heenan standing behind him

[CSL]

ahahaha he's even been watching Rock promos

[St. Jimmy]

UFC is fake. Kthxbai.

[CSL]

You spelled "okay", "thanks" and "bye" wrong.

[Kris P Lettus]

He also spelled "awesome", "fake"..

[Kris P Lettus]

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/ckbF9jmIm5M" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

[Kris P Lettus]

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/DQ1JwcowkIo" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

[Crimson]

hahaha @ the last kid getting interrupted

[Kris P Lettus]

http://podcastone.com/chaelsonnen

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

Well, its over. Podcast one has jumped the shark.

[Kris P Lettus]

Wtf are you talking about

Dude is a cash cow without a home and a podcast is the best medium for him right now

You have aspergers

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

Yeah I don't like him so I have aspergers.

[Kris P Lettus]

You act like the home of SCSA and the Roses report is sacred ground

You have social and mental disorders

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

He's a cheater in a sport where you are in physical combat with others. Drugs to make him hurt people better. Yeah he's a great guy and I want to here what he has to say.

[Wehttam]

steve austin beat his wife

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

I didn't say Austin wasn't a jerk but that was 12 years ago.

[Wehttam]

good to know that you think steroids are worse than domestic violence.

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

Good to know you are getting exercise stretching the truth and jumping to conclusions.

[Wehttam]

obviously, employing a wife beater is better than someone who took steroids.

you saying anything about 'stretching the truth' is beyond hilarious. you are one of the least intelligent people here. there is a whole thread dedicated to retarded things you posted.

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

They don't employ. They are in a business arrangement to share revenue. That thread only exists because Roxer couldn't connect the dots on some clear posts. It's a joke. Most of the posts are DTTS harassing me for being a Democrat and pro-choice.

[Wehttam]

the thread is continuously updated with new retarded things you post. this is an ongoing thing. in almost every thread you post in. like your use of 'jump the shark' in this one.

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

No, you can clearly understand by what I mean by jump the shark. It shouldn't be included. Which is why it was blasted on the thread. It's not a thread of retarded things I say. It's a thread of things that I say that are confusing/unclear.

[Wehttam]

:-\

[Kris P Lettus]

No, you can clearly understand by what I mean by jump the shark. It shouldn't be included. Which is why it was blasted on the thread. It's not a thread of retarded things I say. It's a thread of things that I say that are confusing/unclear.

It was blasted by #1wwffan who not only is also retarded, but has an intense hatred of me for being eight billion times more successful in life than himself.

[screech]

I didn't say Austin wasn't a jerk but that was 12 years ago.

Why does that matter? He still did it.

[screech]

STD, almost everything you post is confusing because you are a moron.

[#1-norm-fan]

Hey look at Kris P bringing me up in another topic I wasn't involved in again to try to convince himself he's special in hopes I won't see it and remind him he's not.

Can you shout "Please love me internet!" any louder?

[Kris P Lettus]

I didn't bring you up std did

[#1-norm-fan]

No, he made a reference to something I was a part of and you used it to do that thing you do where you talk shit in a topic I wasn't involved in in hopes I wouldn't see it.

P.S. Claiming you're more successful than everyone who calls you out for being a huge dumbass (most of the people here) will not make you "cool" no matter how many times you do it.

[Kris P Lettus]

Something you were part of bc you were the only one doing what was referenced

[Swiss Ultimate]

They don't employ. They are in a business arrangement to share revenue. That thread only exists because Roxer couldn't connect the dots on some clear posts. It's a joke. Most of the posts are DTTS harassing me for being a Democrat and pro-choice.

Don't be so hard on yourself, buddy. I don't think you're a Democrat.

[RP]

It was blasted by #1wwffan who not only is also retarded, but has an intense hatred of me for being eight billion times more successful in life than himself.

If I had said this, it would have been " blasted " just saying.

[RP]

Unless you have pics with Paris Hilton and some black guy that rhymes, you're not shit!!!...on the internet.

[Clerk]

They can't put Chael P in prison he's to good looking.


"We only had one [ring girl] and that was Chandella. The other was the IQ card girl. Arianny kind of walks around and holds up her latest test score. One time when there was a title fight, she got all the way up to five and we were very proud of her."


"Even if I thought I could get a submission I'm not laying underneath a grown man with my legs spread on worldwide TV. Some guys subscribe to that theory but I am a Republican and we don't do that."



“If Brock Lesnar was here right now, I’d take my boot off and throw it at him, and he’d better polish it up before he brings it back to me. Talking about he’s the baddest guy in the UFC? Brock, quit eating so many raw eggs and doing push-ups because it’s affecting your realm of reality. Are you kidding me? I’d slap you in your face, and you wouldn’t do anything. ‘I’m Brock Lesnar. I’ve got this $5 haircut and a knife tattooed on my chest.’ I’ll shove it up your face if you get in Chael Sonnen’s way.”



“You’re looking at the reflection of perfection. You’re looking at the man who gets all your attention. You’re looking at the man with the biggest arm. At the man, with the greatest charm, the man in Chicago who will do harm to the guy three doors down.Whatcha gonna do, when you know who? Howya gonna deal, with the man of steel? How ya gonna react to Sonnen’s attack? Tune in on the 28th! 8 p.m. Eastern Time! You’ll find out who the real champion is.”

[Clerk]

I never knew Steve austin beat his wife.... I'm glad I beat him up that time at the WWE live event I told you guys awhile back.

Anyway I hope I never see Austin wrestle again. And if he does I will leave TPWW Forum "FOREVER".

I'd like to see Austin inside a Cage with someone who can defend themselves. Austin vs Cain Velasuqez UFC 200.

[Kris P Lettus]

http://www.washingtonpost.com/sports/ufcs-chael-sonnen-hired-by-espn-after-fox-firing/2014/11/11/5e8387ae-69de-11e4-bafd-6598192a448d_story.html

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

why'd Fox fire him?

[owenbrown]

so how many times is he going to be a guest on Highly Questionable?

[owenbrown]

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[Kris P Lettus]

http://m.espn.go.com/wireless/relatedvideos?id=11874456&backText=Video%20Hub%20-%20ESPN&back=http%3A%2F%2Fm.espn.go.com%2Fgeneral%2Fvideo%3Fvid%3D11874456%26src%3Ddesktop%26rand%3Dref~%257 B%2522ref%2522%253A%2522http%253A%252F%252Fwww.reddit.com%252Fr%252FMMA%252Fnew%252F%2522%257D