Parkmania presents: RAW Thread 8/12/13 - Heyman gets his head kicked in? edition

[Frank Drebin]

and he was never tagged into his match so technically he hasn't rassled

[ClockShot]

Who's Natayla's twin?

[Hanso Amore]

Anyone else feel like that package was pushing the idea of Christian retiring?

[Cool King]

Who's Natayla's twin?

Renee Young.

[Lock Jaw]

SUPERCESARO

[Cool King]

Swagger & Cesaro!

[ClockShot]

SUPERCESARO

Awwwwwww. Ya beat me to it.

[Cool King]

Love that Cesaro is wearing the flag as a cape.

[Lock Jaw]

NOT ENOUGH CHRISTIAN

[Heisenberg]

Lol Zeb hatin on avocado consumption

[Lock Jaw]

WE THE PEEPS

[Anybody Thrilla]

Swagger looks bored with this gimmick, whilst Cesaro is just happy to be getting TV time again.

[Cool King]

I love Zeb but he really needs some new material.

Every promo he says "....Sneaking across our borders!" along with the little walking thing he does with his fingers.

Every promo.

[Lock Jaw]

Swagger looks bored with this gimmick, whilst Cesaro is just happy to be getting TV time again.

That's just Swagger's "I'm playing a serious character now" face.

[Lock Jaw]

http://img.thesun.co.uk/multimedia/archive/01018/Swagger_682x400_1018838a.jpg

[Cool King]

That Christian vignette was pretty sweet by the way.

[Emperor Smeat]

:lol: Cesaro with the cape.

[Cool King]

http://img.thesun.co.uk/multimedia/archive/01018/Swagger_682x400_1018838a.jpg

I think me and Noid are the only people that would look at that image and think to ourselves, "Good times".

[Corndad]

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p>hope <a href="https://twitter.com/Christian4Peeps">@Christian4Peeps</a> brings back those upside down sunglasses... so <a href="https://twitter.com/KaitlynWWE">@KaitlynWWE</a> cant tell where im looking��</p>&mdash; Dolph Ziggler (@HEELZiggler) <a href="https://twitter.com/HEELZiggler/statuses/367098158582476802">August 13, 2013</a></blockquote>
<script async src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

[Emperor Smeat]

I love Zeb but he really needs some new material.

Every promo he says "....Sneaking across our borders!" along with the little walking thing he does with his fingers.

Every promo.

Probably a big drawback from the lack of stuff he has to work with and being in a PG environment.

[Corndad]

Mr. Naomi

[Frank Drebin]

Really digging the Usos.

[Cool King]

"When we say OOS, ya'll say OH!"

[ClockShot]

I don't think either Uso knows what they're saying until they get to their lines at the end.

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

Hahahaha JBL reminded me of an uncle i used to have.

[Anybody Thrilla]

I think me and Noid are the only people that would look at that image and think to ourselves, "Good times".

I'm with you. I still eat a Swaggie sandwich every day.

[ClockShot]

That an attempt at a William Regal chant?

[slik]

Cesaro's uppercut is sooo good

[Anybody Thrilla]

Was that a DUI chant?

[Cool King]

Are they actually chanting "DUI"?

[Hanso Amore]

LOL @ DUI chants

[Anybody Thrilla]

Man, the Usos are pretty good, but I just CAN'T get into them.

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

Narc cost the Real American's the match!

[slik]

The Uso push continues!

[Hanso Amore]

Zeb trying to go Super Saiyan

[Anybody Thrilla]

The Uso push continues!

You can probably thank Total Divas for that, really.

[Corndad]

Anyone on Total Divas = Win tonight lol (Except Bryan who gets a 2nd segment)

[slik]

Narc cost the Real American's the match!

NARC IS A DAMN JEZEBEL!

[Lock Jaw]

Love both of these teams. They work well together.

[Lock Jaw]

Battery on my laptop almost dead. Don't want to go get the charger.

[Poit]

Was that a DUI chant?

Indeed it was. The guys behind us started it.

[ministrychick77]

no Summerfest signs? awww....

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

Indeed it was. The guys behind us started it.

Did you give them the "what the fuck" head turn? or join in?

[slik]

time for moar hhh

[Cool King]

"Official Host Of SummerSlam" AKA "We Have Nothing For You".

[ministrychick77]

sweet... good chorus of boos.

[ClockShot]

"Official Host Of SummerSlam" AKA "We Have Nothing For You".

"Ric Flair says don't use the Figure 4 anymore."

[Anybody Thrilla]

This match could really do without Triple H. Just have it be Cena the Superstar vs. Bryan the Wrestler like they were poking at before. It writes itself.

[Corndad]

Wonder if Miz goes all I was your coach on NXT to Bryan

[Cool King]

lol Narc's face.

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

Cena: HHH screwed me at SummerSlam 2011. Duck him.

[Cool King]

Cena shitting all over MizTV.

[Lock Jaw]

Why does The Miz need so much furniture on his show when no one uses it?

[Corndad]

Wonder if Bryan wins if the belt will have a Golden Beard on the sides lol

[slik]

Will Kevin Nash give Daniel Bryan a Jacknife Powerbomb this Sunday on p-p-v?

[ClockShot]

So IF Bryan wins, what's he get on the belt?

A beard and a dragon? YES! on both sides? Family photos on him, cena, and the Bellas?

[Cool King]

What is the point of this being on MizTV if both guys are going to shit on The Miz.

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

Weird how they are making Cena/Bryan's feud more in Total Divas as almost brothers but not mentioning it on Raw.

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

Oh fucking snap

[slik]

Does anyone have the link to that guy's Reddit that has called all the ppv matches correctly the last few months?

[ministrychick77]

OMG.... loving Bryan's promo

[Corndad]

Where are the guys who said Bryan can't cut a promo now?

[Anybody Thrilla]

Do you really want the WWE title feud to involve the Bellas in any way?

[Hanso Amore]

Oh shit hot promo

[ClockShot]

That's kinda a cue for CM Punk to come out and dispute that.

[Anybody Thrilla]

Cena's always so quick to try and get physical.

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

Do you really want the WWE title feud to involve the Bellas in any way?

No, but it's still weird.

[slik]

Good 'ol smug condescending Cena at it again

[Savio]

Ride the beard

[Anybody Thrilla]

Cena is trying to get his merch more over than Bryan.

[ClockShot]

Oh. Cena plays the Make A Wish card.

[ministrychick77]

i'll admit.. decent cena promo

[Savio]

Wonder if Bryan wins if the belt will have a Golden Beard on the sides lol
Maybe Yes! and No!

[Anybody Thrilla]

Cena's getting busy on the stick right now.

[ron the dial]

cena's shirts are akin to the american flag i guess

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

Hhahahaha Bray Wyatt head.

[slik]

So far from Cena I've learned...

USA #1
Make A Wish
Five Moves of Doom
Hometown Pop

[Hanso Amore]

If a cena shirt hits the ground should we burn it?

[ClockShot]

Someone's got some pipes in the crowd.

[Anybody Thrilla]

If a cena shirt hits the ground should we burn it?

I say we start before he even takes it off.

[ron the dial]

love cena but sick of his wwe universe cocklicking every time another wrestler comes at him.

[Savio]

Punch him Bryan!

[Anybody Thrilla]

Someone's got some pipes in the crowd.

DB: "You talk like all of those people are so much better than me..."

GUY IN CROWD: "They are!"

[#1-norm-fan]

HAH!

Bryan: "You say that like those guys are all better than me."

Guy in the crowd: "They are!"

[#1-norm-fan]

Goddammit, AT!

[Corndad]

Preach it.

[slik]

love cena but sick of his wwe universe cocklicking every time another wrestler comes at him.

You mean cocksnoggling rtd

[#1-norm-fan]

That Cena promo was pretty fucking stellar.

[ministrychick77]

damn... can we see old school american dragon at summerslam? like bryan kicking cena's fucking head in?

[Savio]

Smack miz!

[ron the dial]

great mic work from both guys this segment

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

Awesome

[slik]

Heated Promo up in this joint

[Anybody Thrilla]

This is great.

[#1-norm-fan]

Bryan being a douche there after Cena made a very valid point.

[ClockShot]

Good one, Dan.

[Hanso Amore]

OoOOOOOh Denying the slap....I like it.

Bryan is going Heel at Summerslam me thinks

[slik]

annnnnnnnnnd the hot promo ends with hhh showing up

[Anybody Thrilla]

Triple HTV

[dronepool]

Great promo.

[slik]

and blandy!

[#1-norm-fan]

Fuck. The heat for this match just jumped up big time.

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

Bryan being a douche there after Cena made a very valid point.

Didn't Cena say he respected Daniel Bryan before? Valid point=proving he's a liar?

[Anybody Thrilla]

They sure are playing up Orton cashing in pretty heavy. That makes me think it won't happen at Summerslam. Or something zany will happen.

[slik]

Good Lesnar promo earlier and Good stuff from Bryan/Cena

[ClockShot]

Orton's new shirt looks like a knock off of the Silver Snakes shirt from Legends of the Hidden Temple.

[Corndad]

Good work from both Cena and Bryan there.

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

Way to kill the heat from the promo HHH and Orton doing nothing at all. Assholes. Should have ended with the staredown.

[Malfeitor]

Fuck. Sunday will be awesome.

[KyleEmmott]

That was a great promo

[#1-norm-fan]

lol Love how Triple H and Orton just show up as the tension reaches a fever pitch to be there.

[Corndad]

How fuckin made would Bryan be if he beats Cena then beats Orton after when he's trying to cash in. Holy shit.

[Emperor Smeat]

Segment was great.

Loved how quickly Bryan spun around everything Cena was spewing about in the end.

[Heisenberg]

Nice promo, 4 drop kicks out of 5

[ministrychick77]

yeah.. hoping Bryan wins at summerslam.

[ron the dial]

i love that there is no clear cut heel or face here. both have legitimate stances and it really is all about the title. at least as far as those 2 are concerned. obviously they are trying to piggy back some other shit onto this feud, but the main substance of it is phenomenal so far.

[Anybody Thrilla]

Hey, you guys remember that time Eva Marie told Fandango that she could dance, but it was a lie? Man, those were good times.

[ClockShot]

I miss Lil' Jimmy.

[#1-norm-fan]

Didn't Cena say he respected Daniel Bryan before? Valid point=proving he's a liar?

That was a reference to Cena talking about how he's WRESTLED around the world for 11 years and basically saying Bryan is a wrestling snob for implying that it doesn't count.

[Anybody Thrilla]

Face R-Truth is just a waste of everyone's time.

[ministrychick77]

awww.... i like fandango. and his theme

[ron the dial]

NXT dance contest was better

[Poit]

Did you give them the "what the fuck" head turn? or join in?

The latter.

[Heisenberg]

awww.... i like fandango. and his theme

Do females like you appreciate precise and healthy drop kicks?

[Anybody Thrilla]

That wasn't even in the top five dance contests of 2013.

[Corndad]

Yeah that "match" had to be cut short cause of the amazingness before it.

Also figured out tonight the Total Divas Push may even trump Being HHH's workout buddy Push.

[Anybody Thrilla]

I was thinking about watching Summer Camp after Raw, then I realized I hadn't smashed my balls with a hammer in a while.

[slik]

Got distracted during that and re-watch the Guardians of the Galaxy leaked footage.

#Batista

[#1-norm-fan]

That wasn't even in the top five dance contests of 2013.

WWE has been trying to find a dance contest to match the greatness of Cole vs JR for years now.

[ministrychick77]

Do females like you appreciate precise and healthy drop kicks?

of course! i appreciate great wrestling as well as nice (to me at least) bodies, both men & women

[Anybody Thrilla]

I guess I would wear a suit if I knew about a fight a week in advance.

[slik]

I wonder what Joy Giovanni, the Big Show's 'special friend' is up to these days...

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

PUTTING ON THE FOIL! Every Game! -The Hanson Brothers, Slap Shot.

[Cool King]

ARE VEE DEE!

[slik]

Looking for the ghost of Andre The Giant

[#1-norm-fan]

I can see RVD winning this battle royal.

I can also kinda see Ryback winning and turning face again to challenge Ambrose.

Probably RVD though.

[Heisenberg]

of course! i appreciate great wrestling as well as nice (to me at least) bodies, both men & women

Whoa, u should drop kick someone in your household the next time they pop an attitude. Tell'em Mr. DropKick himself Heisenberg sent ya

[ClockShot]

Battle Royal now?

Figured it would close out the show.

[Anybody Thrilla]

How are Brodus and Sweet T still the worst dancers of all time? You'd think somebody would have taught them some moves by now.

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

Danny Ambrose! Nice one Cole.

[Anybody Thrilla]

I wonder what Joy Giovanni, the Big Show's 'special friend' is up to these days...

Ohhhh, she was sexy.

[ministrychick77]

Whoa, u should drop kick someone in your household the next time they pop an attitude. Tell'em Mr. DropKick himself Heisenberg sent ya

dropkick? nah... i have the 'billion dollar bitch-slap' for that. i leave marks

[#1-norm-fan]

Looking for the ghost of Andre The Giant

The ghost of The Big Show might be a surprise entrant. We all saw him get thrown off the top of Cobo Hall by Hulk Hogan back in the mid-90's before coming back from the dead to win the title. Considering he's also Andre the Giant's son, that line by Ambrose could have been a very well placed line to start the feud.

[Cool King]

How are Brodus and Sweet T still the worst dancers of all time? You'd think somebody would have taught them some moves by now.

All Brodus has been doing for the past year now is that shitacular "Gangnam Style Dance".

[Heisenberg]

dropkick? nah... i have the 'billion dollar bitch-slap' for that. i leave marks

If you're going to be my Sister of DropKicks u r going yo have to change up your move set. Cut some promos and get a feel for it. I'll be here to guide you

[Corndad]

I wonder what Joy Giovanni, the Big Show's 'special friend' is up to these days...

She was fantastic. Top 5 of mine all time with Trish Torrie Kaitlyn and Rated R Era Lita. Honorable Mention to Pre Facelift Candice Michelle and Maria.

[Heisenberg]

I have an Amish DropKick where it takes the electricity out of the opponent's body and destroys the venue

[#1-norm-fan]

Battle Royal now?

Figured it would close out the show.

Punk vs Heyman would take precedent on the go-home show for SummerSlam over a match to decide who wrestles on the pre-show.

[Anybody Thrilla]

Whose theme was that dubstep shit? Gabriel?

[Cool King]

WUB WUB WUB!

[Cool King]

It's wig splittin' time!

[Anybody Thrilla]

I was kinda hoping Big Show had gotten a jobber entrance during the break.

[Cool King]

Whose theme was that dubstep shit? Gabriel?

Yup.

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/mPow4XpKVRk" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

[Anybody Thrilla]

Ryback finally got redemption for not being able to Shellshock Tensai all that time ago.

[#1-norm-fan]

Regardless of whoever wins this battle royal, there's gonna be some guys left off the SummerSlam card who should definitely not be left off the card.

[ministrychick77]

sexual chocolate chant

[Savio]

finals 3 will be henry, RVD and Ryback

[Corndad]

Heath Slater hanging outside the ring lol

[Savio]

This is the longest Khali has ever been a part of a match.

[Anybody Thrilla]

"If you're eliminated twice, can you not even COME to Summerslam?"

:lol:

[Heisenberg]

One memory that comes to mind when someone is being sneaky during battle royal matches is Repo Man pulling out all the stops and tricks

[Emperor Smeat]

Bleh, hate commercials during battle royales. At least this time it didn't occur right after the thing started.

[Anybody Thrilla]

One memory that comes to mind when someone is being sneaky during battle royal matches is Repo Man pulling out all the stops and tricks

Remember Jerry Lawler hiding under the ring?

[slik]

Not sure if RVD, Ryback or Mark Henry is going to win this.

[Cool King]

I really like Titus.

[ministrychick77]

Remember Jerry Lawler hiding under the ring?
i was at that rumble!

[Cool King]

And as I say that, he's eliminated.

Typical.

[Frank Drebin]

WOW

[ron the dial]

KOFI

[Anybody Thrilla]

Sweet sequence with Kofi and the RAs.

[Corndad]

Kofi is always redic in Battle Royals

[slik]

Kofi Kingston with the move of the night!
Holy Shit!

[Cool King]

Great Kofi spot.

[Anybody Thrilla]

I like that the Real Americans work as a real team. Just like they did at Money in the Bank.

[slik]

Awesome Battle Royal

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

Wig Split Vs. Leg Split.

[Emperor Smeat]

Crowd's going crazy for RVD

[Savio]

I liked the character Ryback showed tonight

[Corndad]

The Whole F"n Show.

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

Ambrose vs. RVD will be the fucking tits!

[Cool King]

Lock Jaw is now pissed.

[Frank Drebin]

Great battle royal. Kudos to all involved except Khali.

[ron the dial]

pretty solid battle royal overall

[Cool King]

That was a good Battle Royal. :y:

[Hanso Amore]

Cue the shield and big show

[Corndad]

Shield comes out...

[ClockShot]

Sierra...........Hotel.............India................Echo............Lima..............Delta..... ..................SHIELD!

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

Henry: Fuck you I didn't want to be in the pre-show anyways. I'm a main event Wig Splitter son.

[Hanso Amore]

Henry and show vs rollins and reigns!

[Frank Drebin]

aaawwwww shit.....

[Savio]

Big Show?

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

RVD: I'm so high right now but I can still count to 2 and 3.

[slik]

Big Show coming?

[ClockShot]

"It's their yard"

[Frank Drebin]

WEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLL....WELL ITS THE BIG SHOW

[slik]

Yep!

[ron the dial]

oh hell yeah

[ClockShot]

Show's back. And ZERO reaction.

[Corndad]

You forget your Gear Show?

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

Big Show: I am the male Alicia Fox!

[Anybody Thrilla]

Great camera work on the Seth Rollins "Oh Sh--"

[Hanso Amore]

Big Show dressed like a Mechanic at his kids dance recital.

[slik]

No Joy Giovanni tonight w/ Show though.

[Malfeitor]

RVD vs Ambrose? God, yes.

[Corndad]

How many SummerSlam Matches does that make? That's a packed show.

[Emperor Smeat]

So King apparently forgot how to count.

[Frank Drebin]

Wish my father in law was the Big Show. First meeting would shit my pants, after that would be cool.

[slik]

Big Show: I am the male Alicia Fox!

He turned heel and face twice while walking to the ring.

[Hanso Amore]

Wish my father in law was the Big Show. First meeting would shit my pants, after that would be cool.

I would take him everytime I bought a car

[Cool King]

How many SummerSlam Matches does that make? That's a packed show.

About eight.

[Frank Drebin]

Are they sure they don't want another Total Divas segment closing out the show? Isn't it airing at the same time as the PPV? WWE has to get their priorities in order.

[Hanso Amore]

"Listen, Mr Hanso you are really going to want that undercoat, its going to save you money in the long run....."

"ITS THE BIG SHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW"

[Corndad]

Cena/Bryan
Del Rio/Christian
Punk/Brock
Shield/Big Show Henry
Dolph/Big E Mixed Tag
Cody/Sandow
Natalya/Bella
Kane/Wyatt
RVD/Ambrose
Any I'm forgetting?

[slik]

Kane/Wyatt

[Cool King]

Cena/Bryan
Del Rio/Christian
Punk/Brock
Sheild/Big Show Henry
Dolph/Big E Mixed Tag
Cody/Sandow
Natalya/Bella
RVD/Ambrose
Any I'm forgetting?

Kane/Wyatt

[Frank Drebin]

Cena/Bryan
Del Rio/Christian
Punk/Brock
Shield/Big Show Henry
Dolph/Big E Mixed Tag
Cody/Sandow
Natalya/Bella
Kane/Wyatt
RVD/Ambrose
Any I'm forgetting?

Hornswaggle vs JTG

[slik]

Hey Frank Drebin how u doing?

[ClockShot]

Paul Heyman with no entrance music.

[Corndad]

Jesus. That's a card.

[Frank Drebin]

Hey Frank Drebin how u doing?

Doing well, my man. Enjoying the show with all my great friends at TPWW.

How 'bout you, m'lad?

[James Steele]

Damn.

[slik]

Doing well, watching some rasslin and having some peach iced tea.

[Ermaximus]

Failed tag teams 101.

Big Show and Mark Henry. The Chocolate Show.

[Cool King]

I would have loved it if Heyman came out to his old SmackDown GM theme.

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/GDrDQiVnAqY" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

[Cool King]

Brock has pyro again!

[ministrychick77]

ok. whoever's been making the video packages... great job!!

[Corndad]

This better be good to end the show when the Cena/Bryan hype was so amazing earlier.

[ron the dial]

that snarl in the package when lesnar hits the F5. nice touch.

[ClockShot]

As Tony Schiavone would say, "We're running out of show!"

[Frank Drebin]

Yah, ppl can say what they want about the 'E, but their video production is always top notch.

[ministrychick77]

hehe.. "arrive. bork. leave." sign in the crowd

[Savio]

I wonder if Brock would be as over as he is if his hair was brown or black.

[ClockShot]

Cut to the back, Curtis Axel got jumped.

[Malfeitor]

I love Heyman.

[ron the dial]

CAMERA BEATDOWN

[Savio]

Curtis save him!

[ron the dial]

loved all of these straight up beatdowns leading up to this match. should be pretty brutal at summerslam.

[Emperor Smeat]

:lol: Heyman

[Malfeitor]

No, really. I love Heyman. Haha.

[slik]

Great segment to end RAW

[Frank Drebin]

SS should be good.

[Anybody Thrilla]

Well that was pretty fun.

[ron the dial]

nothing like the cena/bryan hype earlier, but a fine way to end the show.

[Cool King]

Well, that was a good Raw.

I enjoyed it. :y:

[#1-norm-fan]

Shades of HBK-Sid/Sid-Jose Lothario

[Corndad]

I'm so confused now who wins this. I mean going by that probably Brock but I just don't know. I love it. I have no idea for a few matches Sunday. I repeat. I love it.

[ministrychick77]

that was a damn good lead in to the ppv...
and damn did punk look hot. he's totally playing up the comparison to wolverine

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

Should probably figure out if I'm working on Sunday or not. Def want to have a PPV party at my new apartment sooner rather than later. Don't really know anybody in the area that likes wrestling though.

[Lock Jaw]

WHY WAS THAT CAMERA MAN'S CAMERA NOT ATTACHED TO ANYTHING?!

[Wake Up Call]

Didn't buy Bryan on the microphone tonight. Something seemed off about it, or Cena was 100 x better. Could be the latter.