WWE RAW 8/1 feat. THE Beast, THE BOSS, and some other people worthy of the "THE" tag

[evanbrown]

ROMAN EMPIRE IS BACK ON RAW! U.S. Title officially the biggest title on RAW now, way bigger and more bigger than dumb Uniturtle Title

[KIRA]

She does the Wasteland better than Barrett way better

[Poit]

Well, at least this time Nia Jax didn't nearly kill someone with her Jackhammer.

[owenbrown]

I am so happy Roman is going to represent the United States against Rusev! other-owen do you want to have a jerkoff session on skype later to celebrate!!?

I wish Triple A gave me the power to delete you

[Poit]

I seriously thought Nia Jax was going to beat up Byron.

[KIRA]

Could even be worse. Could be the Saxtonation.

<iframe src='https://gfycat.com/ifr/BronzeUnfitCoot' frameborder='0' scrolling='no' width='640' height='360' allowfullscreen></iframe>

Might take the crown from the Killswitch as most over complicated finisher

[Emperor Smeat]

Wonder if Henry feels extra sad tonight.

First Rusev shut down the Hall of Pain and now Nia took his World's Strongest Slam.

[slik]

Nia Jax seems like another Rock cousin who can't cut a promo

[DAMN iNATOR]

Nia being on the main roster makes me kinda wish someone would reaxh out to Kharma and try to get her signed to a contract again...would be interesting IMHO, if those two ever met in the ring.

Probably never gonna happen, just sayin'.

[slik]

Am I the only person who liked JACOB NOVAK from the above gif...wonder w/e happened to him

[Emperor Smeat]

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-lang="en"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">New Day are part of a balanced breakfast and a balanced segment. <a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/RAWTonight?src=hash">#RAWTonight</a></p>&mdash; WWE Creative Humor (@WWECreative_ish) <a href="https://twitter.com/WWECreative_ish/status/760292877528240128">August 2, 2016</a></blockquote>
<script async src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

[Frank Drebin]

Just spitballing here....somewhere down the line, would a Kharma/Jax match be any good?

[Frank Drebin]

damnit, damninator....

[Lock Jaw]

Feel like after Battleground they should be doing something with Sami Zayn.... ride the momentum of a big win in a great match.....

Perhaps even he should be the guy in the Summerslam main event instead of Balor....

[DAMN iNATOR]

Just spitballing here....somewhere down the line, would a Kharma/Jax match be any good?

See my above post, Frankky D. IMHO, I believe it would be incredible.

[Frank Drebin]

Feel like after Battleground they should be doing something with Sami Zayn.... ride the momentum of a big win in a great match.....

Perhaps even he should be the guy in the Summerslam main event instead of Balor....

Zayn gonna be used like Neville. Mark my words.

[evanbrown]

I wish Triple A gave me the power to delete you

lol

[Lock Jaw]

Have they dropped Gallows/Anderson being "The Club"? Seems like they have.....

In favour of Balor having "Balor Club".....

[KIRA]

Nia Jax seems like another Rock cousin who can't cut a promo

Right? Its like he absorbed any and all charisma his family would've passed to their kids.

[Poit]

That's not PG.

[owenbrown]

THAT'S NOT PG! :wtf:

[KIRA]

Zayn gonna be used like Neville. Mark my words.

Don't think so he's waaaaay more likeable than Neville.

[Lock Jaw]

Zayn gonna be used like Neville. Mark my words.

Think he has better chances than that

[Dark One]

Am I the only person who liked JACOB NOVAK from the above gif...wonder w/e happened to him

Five minutes of internet sleuthing shows me that he's posting shitty Trump memes on Facebook and not wrestling anywhere.

[DAMN iNATOR]

KFC billboard...fucking one nearest me is closed for stupid BS remodelling and have been for something like 3 weeks now. Wish they'd hurry that shit up.

Also, probably less than 0.1 mi. down Saginaw Hwy., they're almost finished building a Rally's, AND about 0.25 mi (or less) down from that is the location where a Chic-Fil-A...this on a road which already has a TON of restaurants...yep, our own "Restaurant Row". Really makes me feel #blessed.

[Lock Jaw]

Seems like they have def dropped "The Club".....

[Dark One]

New Day is still fairly entertaining, but I'd like to see Gallows & Anderson take the belts for a change-up. It would give New Day something else to do, or at least a slightly different angle. I had hopes the Wyatt feud would do that, but less than a week later, they were just the same despite almost being murdered in a swamp.

[DAMN iNATOR]

Seems like they have def dropped "The Club".....

Good. That name always made me hungry for a club sandwich anyway.

[Poit]

:lol:

[Dark One]

Sigh.

[slik]

Five minutes of internet sleuthing shows me that he's posting shitty Trump memes on Facebook and not wrestling anywhere.

damn

[Emperor Smeat]

Why not just have Gallows and Anderson lose by DQ if this was just going to be a throw-away match.


Nia Jax seems like another Rock cousin who can't cut a promo

Probably part of some unknown Papa Shango curse of being related to the Rock.

[Dark One]

NEW ERA... same fucky bullshit finish after bullshit finish.

[KIRA]

So Gallows and Also ran Anderson gonna take the belts?

[Lock Jaw]

Gallows yelling "WE'RE THE CLUB" so maybe it isn't dropped, or no one gave him the memo

[slik]

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-lang="en"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">What the fuck is this?!!!???? RT <a href="https://twitter.com/AyeDee704">@AyeDee704</a>: Meanwhile in China <a href="https://t.co/23AvOjwz9Z">pic.twitter.com/23AvOjwz9Z</a></p>&mdash; Black Bauer (@NY_Wiseass) <a href="https://twitter.com/NY_Wiseass/status/760280729024593922">August 2, 2016</a></blockquote>
<script async src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

[Dark One]

Mixed Tag ends with distraction / roll-up.
Stupid Pokemon Go match ends with a dropped phone and roll-up.
Titus wins via roll-up + tights.
Club vs. New Day ends with self-inflicted distraction + roll-up.
Two squash matches.
Rusev vs. Henry was the only thing with a decent, decisive finish.

[DAMN iNATOR]

If they don't drop the belts before SummerSlam, like them or not, New Day will become the first-ever tag team in WWE to hold the WWE Tag Team Championships for 1 year. WP says their current reign is at "345+" days.

[Simple Fan]

Only way I'm cool with Balor winning the Universal Championship is if they help him.

[Dark One]

Last week's Raw was helped dramatically by having matches with decent stakes and decisive finishes.

This Raw is still better than most of the pre-draft ones, but we're basically back to the same old bullshit for the matches.

[Lock Jaw]

Medic: Where does it hurt?

Big E: MY PENIS, YOU STUPID IDIOT

[Poit]

Worst doctor ever.

"Where does it hurt?", he asks the man grimacing in pain and holding his groin.

[Lock Jaw]

Sweet new camera angle for Sheamus entrance

[Lock Jaw]

Sweet new tron too

[Poit]

Does a sweet new anything for Sheamus matter at this point?

[Poit]

Okay, I'm fine with dueling European uppercuts.

[Lock Jaw]

Does a sweet new anything for Sheamus matter at this point?

Yeah

[Lock Jaw]

RESPECT THE LOOGIE

[Dark One]

<blockquote class="instagram-media" data-instgrm-captioned data-instgrm-version="7" style=" background:#FFF; border:0; border-radius:3px; box-shadow:0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width:658px; padding:0; width:99.375%; width:-webkit-calc(100% - 2px); width:calc(100% - 2px);"><div style="padding:8px;"> <div style=" background:#F8F8F8; line-height:0; margin-top:40px; padding:50.0% 0; text-align:center; width:100%;"> <div style=" background:url(data:image/png;base64,iVBORw0KGgoAAAANSUhEUgAAACwAAAAsCAMAAAApWqozAAAABGdBTUEAALGPC/xhBQAAAAFzUkdCAK7OHOkAAAAMUExURczMzPf399fX1+bm5mzY9AMAAADiSURBVDjLvZXbEsMgCES5/P8/t9FuRVCRmU73JWlzosgSIIZURCjo/ad+EQJJB4Hv8BFt+IDpQoCx1wjOSBFhh2XssxEIYn3ulI/6MNReE07UIWJEv8UEOWDS88LY97kqyTliJKKtuYBbruAyVh5wOHiXmpi5we58Ek028czwyuQdLKPG1Bkb4NnM+VeAnfHqn1k4+GP T6uGQcvu2h2OVuIf/gWUFyy8OWEpdyZSa3aVCqpVoVvzZZ2VTnn2wU8qzVjDDetO90GSy9mVLqtgYSy231MxrY6I2gGqjrTY0L8fxCxfCBbhWrsYYAAAA AElFTkSuQmCC); display:block; height:44px; margin:0 auto -44px; ██████████relative; top:-22px; width:44px;"></div></div> <p style=" margin:8px 0 0 0; padding:0 4px;"> <a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/BIgJeAmjSL2/" style=" color:#000; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:normal; line-height:17px; text-decoration:none; word-wrap:break-word;" target="_blank">El #professional doing #luchathings #wweknoxville #��life @kalistowwe @sincarawwe_ camerawork by @mmmgorgeous</a></p> <p style=" color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; line-height:17px; margin-bottom:0; margin-top:8px; overflow:hidden; padding:8px 0 7px; text-align:center; text-overflow:ellipsis; white-space:nowrap;">A video posted by Cesaro (@wwecesaro) on <time style=" font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; line-height:17px;" datetime="2016-07-30T22:25:50+00:00">Jul 30, 2016 at 3:25pm PDT</time></p></div></blockquote>
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[Emperor Smeat]

:y: Ceasro won

[Lock Jaw]

Sweet Neutralizer Outta Nowhere

[Emperor Smeat]

Worst doctor ever.

"Where does it hurt?", he asks the man grimacing in pain and holding his groin.

So the WWE's version of Dr. Nick from the Simpsons?

[Dark One]

:y: Ceasro won

And it was a decisive, clean finish in a match on Raw. HOLY SHIT.

[owenbrown]

Does a sweet new anything for Sheamus matter at this point?

I miss "It's a Shameful Thing, Lobster Head." :(

[Poit]

It's Jinder!

[Lock Jaw]

DON'T HINDER JINDER

[Poit]

I miss "It's a Shameful Thing, Lobster Head." :(

Too many limes.

[Ruien]

This has been a fun Raw. Seth is so damn amazing. Not really caring about Brock though. There is no Heyman right? Seems like it will be a train wreck.

[Dark One]

Jinder Mahal is indeed back. What a time to be alive.

[Poit]

They're a two man baaaaaaaaand!

[Evil Vito]

2MB!!! :love:

[Dark One]

This has been a fun Raw. Seth is so damn amazing. Not really caring about Brock though. There is no Heyman right? Seems like it will be a train wreck.

He will apparently be here.

[Dark One]

Can't wait for Nathan Jones to return and kick Heath in the face.

[slik]

Jinder Mahal !
I mark for Jinder Mahal!

[owenbrown]

Welp.

[Lock Jaw]

RAW has unlocked another jobber!

[Poit]

They're a two man baaaaaaaaand!

Or... not.

[Evil Vito]

2MB :(

[Dark One]

Jinder Mahal on Raw. What a coup for Mick Foley.

[Emperor Smeat]

So much for the rumor about Jinder going to Smackdown.

The "Beat Up Heath Slater" weekly challenge series so far has been a great success for the WWE.

[owenbrown]

:wtf:

[Emperor Smeat]

:n: Jim Marvinluter

Jericho should have mentioned Ralphus instead.

[Poit]

Jimmin Mavinlooter, shotput champion.

[Dark One]

Jimen Marvenluder from Apple, Ontario.

[Poit]

Tom Phillips must be so uncomfortable the way he always squats for interviews.

[Exyle]

This is the best Chris Jericho.

[Lock Jaw]

Owens/Jericho a great team

[Ruien]

Kevin Owens is the #1 wrestler I do not want to be in charge of watching my back. Dude will bail on you in an instant.

[Lock Jaw]

LET'S GO

[Lock Jaw]

They should do an angle where Sami is literally from the underground

Like he is king of the mole people or something

[Dark One]

They should do an angle where Sami is literally from the underground

Like he is king of the mole people or something

Does he get hit in the balls by a football like the most famous Mole Man?

[slik]

I am ready for Bork Lazer

[Emperor Smeat]

If Sami ever decides to change his finisher, Blue Thunder Bomb would be perfect because of how great he pulls off the move.

[slik]

I got someone to tweet YAAASSSSS QUUEEEENN at Brock Lesnar...it's the simple things that keep me happy

[slik]

Love this match so far

[Dark One]

The right man won--thankfully clean and decisively--but it was also a dumb match to make if you were going to capitalize on Zayn's win at Battleground.

[Lock Jaw]

Still wish Sami was in Balor's spot......

[Lock Jaw]

The right man won--thankfully clean and decisively--but it was also a dumb match to make if you were going to capitalize on Zayn's win at Battleground.

Momentum? What's that?

[owenbrown]

Hey look, they gave Paul Heyman more money

[Frank Drebin]

Hope Heyman sells the shit out of this match. Right now, it feels like they're overestimating how much people want to see this match.

[Dark One]

I got someone to tweet YAAASSSSS QUUEEEENN at Brock Lesnar...it's the simple things that keep me happy

http://media.giphy.com/media/cXdiAKV346OOI/giphy.gif

[Lock Jaw]

Hope Heyman sells the shit out of this match. Right now, it feels like they're overestimating how much people want to see this match.

Yeah... really needs to hype this up because right now Rollins/Balor and Ambrose/Ziggler really don't feel like big "Summerslam worthy" main events....

[owenbrown]

PUFF DADDY?! :wtf:

[evanbrown]

PUFF DADDY?! :wtf:


ISN'T IS GREAT! Hey can you send me your login and password I want to synch our accounts. :shifty:

[slik]

Heyman <3

[Poit]

Viper Slayer vs. Legend Killer at Summerslam.

Battle of the monikers.

[Lock Jaw]

PUFF DADDY?! :wtf:

Should have got BUFF DADDY, his rates are probably cheaper

[Dark One]

THE DEVASTATING DOPER. THE PERSONIFICATION OF PEDs. THE ENHANCED EMPEROR.

[owenbrown]

ISN'T IS GREAT! Hey can you send me your login and password I want to synch our accounts. :shifty:

go fuck a rusted metal pole

[Lock Jaw]

Mike Lient

[owenbrown]

Mike Lient

didn't he job to Braun Strowman earlier tonight?

[Lock Jaw]

:heart: Heyman

[Frank Drebin]

Don't think so he's waaaaay more likeable than Neville.

Think he has better chances than that

Mark my words. Zayn gonna get a fairly meaningless win now and again, but mostly be the jobber to the stars. Puts on a good match, works well with just about anyone. Perfect guy to help put other people over.

[DAMN iNATOR]

It does still bother me, Paul, and I will NEVER "get over it".

[owenbrown]

Brock going to send the voices to Suplex City as well, isn't he?

[Emperor Smeat]

Heyman is really amazing on the mic. Surprised the WWE never bothered to have him as a promo trainer at NXT/developmental whenever Lesnar isn't doing anything.

:lol: Heyman

[owenbrown]

RKO OUTTA NOWHERE!!!!

[Lock Jaw]

Randy Orton in Pants with the RKO Outta Nowhere

[Emperor Smeat]

That setup for the RKO was perfect.

:lol: Steph getting angry at Orton taking off his shirt.

[Lock Jaw]

Roster lines already breaking down!!

[DAMN iNATOR]

RKO OUTTA NOWHERE!!!!

\_0__/

[slik]

nice RKO

[owenbrown]

ISN'T IS GREAT! Hey can you send me your login and password I want to synch our accounts. :shifty:

http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view/17726/stunner-on-cena-o.gif

[slik]

damn @ owenbrown

I don't think you should give that account your password/login

[owenbrown]

what do you think I am fucking stupid, slik?

http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view/17726/stunner-on-cena-o.gif

[Emperor Smeat]

https://67.media.tumblr.com/fdc0ee0633ca430ca851bbb46e1deea0/tumblr_ob9ikq2qnm1saykaxo3_400.gif

https://66.media.tumblr.com/c2d60ffbaf6afb9165d76285396f94d4/tumblr_ob9ikq2qnm1saykaxo2_400.gif

[Evil Vito]

I'm not too bothered by Orton showing up. The match had already been booked before the draft and it was inevitable at least one of them would crash the other show to move along the build.

As long as this is the last "interpromotional" match for a prolonged period of time I see no harm.

[Simple Fan]

Feel like now that we know the jobbers get $5,000 if they win, one of them has to win a match some how.

[Emperor Smeat]

:wtf: Why is there a car in the crowd?
I donut see a car in the crowd, where is it

http://i.imgur.com/O8A4DwJ.png

http://i.imgur.com/fb0Q7WY.png

[Lock Jaw]

How do you get to your seat?

[DAMN iNATOR]

what do you think I am fucking stupid, slik?

http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view/17726/stunner-on-cena-o.gif

https://media.giphy.com/media/Lov3N6USj1WE/giphy.gif

[Volare]

So this is all that mattered to me. :)

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[Cool King]

Raw was good this week.

I really enjoyed it. :)

[DAMN iNATOR]

I did too. So it wasn't QUITE as good as last week, but still very very solid.