Raw Thread - 1/8/18 - Return of the Miz...Cruiserweight Title Match...Probably some other things too!

[Anybody Thrilla]

Braun was pretty proficient with that grappling hook.

[Dark One]

Braun Strowman is the world's greatest cartoon character.

[Emperor Smeat]

So ummm guess Vacant is getting a Universal title reign soon considering Braun just killed off the champ and the potential new mayor of Knoxville.

[Dark One]

Braun was pretty proficient with that grappling hook.

He moonlights as a gentleman thief.

[Savio]

That scene should have been extended 7 minutes with braun missing on the grappling hook.

[slik]

Braun effortlessly throwing Lesnar like a dart is my favorite #wwe #raw moment of the year

[slik]

Until Braun used a grappling hook to bring the set down on Lesnar and Kane while Heyman screamed 'Oh My God', that is

[Anybody Thrilla]

Yeah, I'd say that was the Raw moment of THIS year, for sure.

[Anybody Thrilla]

I was hoping Braun would get back to this sort of thing.

Hahahahaha, nobody helped Kane at all.

[Dark One]

Braun Strowman should be a 17-time World Champ by now.

[Anybody Thrilla]

Strowman should have flipped that ambulance.

[Dark One]

I was hoping Braun would get back to this sort of thing.

Hahahahaha, nobody helped Kane at all.

They saw the wig and thought he was a mannequin.

[Lock Jaw]

local medical facility

[Dark One]

Strowman should have flipped that ambulance.

Perfect opportunity for

I'M NOT FINISHED WITH YOU

[Savio]

No one cares to check on Kane? lol

[KIRA]

Bruan just legit murdered two dudes

This shouldve been Roman's fate........ all of it

[Anybody Thrilla]

I'm not sure how I feel about the Samoan Submission Machine having flowers in his floor graphic, but I'm glad to see him regardless.

[Dark One]

I'm not sure how I feel about the Samoan Submission Machine having flowers in his floor graphic, but I'm glad to see him regardless.

They're the flowers he's going to send to Heath's 7 kids after he chokes Heath to death.

Gotta keep them nearby.

[KIRA]

Aww WWE c'mon he can't feed his kids from the ICU.

[Dark One]

Yo, ABT.

https://i.imgur.com/mzE2QT2.gif

[Anybody Thrilla]

Yo, ABT.

https://i.imgur.com/mzE2QT2.gif

Don't make me like this team.

[Evil Vito]

Braun Strowman should be a 17-time World Champ by now.

Nah. 1-time World Champ but on the fast track to an Okada reign.

[slik]

I loved that entire segment

[Dark One]

I'm just trying to make it less painful.

[KIRA]

He won't even be able to feed himself he'll be getting his nutrients via drip

[slik]

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-lang="en"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">.<a href="https://twitter.com/KaneWWE?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@KaneWWE</a> and <a href="https://twitter.com/BrockLesnar?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@BrockLesnar</a>'s worlds come CRASHING DOWN as <a href="https://twitter.com/BraunStrowman?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@BraunStrowman</a> sends a message to his <a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/RoyalRumble?src=hash&amp;ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">#RoyalRumble</a> opponents! <a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/RAW?src=hash&amp;ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">#RAW</a> <a href="https://twitter.com/HeymanHustle?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@HeymanHustle</a> <a href="https://t.co/8hGqc3Yfk6">pic.twitter.com/8hGqc3Yfk6</a></p>&mdash; WWE (@WWE) <a href="https://twitter.com/WWE/status/950567445944610816?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">January 9, 2018</a></blockquote>
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[KIRA]

Oh its Rhyno.. fuck his kids

[Anybody Thrilla]

Something about Rhyno's aesthetic bothers me. Maybe he could use some kneepads or something.

[KIRA]

Yo, ABT.

https://i.imgur.com/mzE2QT2.gif

Gotta gif of that entrance pose that was great.

[Anybody Thrilla]

Conversely, there is absolutely nothing wrong with Charly Caruso's aesthetic.

[Emperor Smeat]

Braun Strowman should be a 17-time World Champ by now.

For someone of Braun's magnitude, he should just make a belt for himself and proclaim himself as the first and only Multiverse champion. Would be a higher tier than Lesnar as the champ of the Universe.

[Dark One]

Hell yeah, give me Joe/Cena at Wrestlemania.

[Anybody Thrilla]

Nia is a piss poor promo.

[Anybody Thrilla]

Hell yeah, give me Joe/Cena at Wrestlemania.

:y::y::y:

[Evil Vito]

Cena/Joe at WrestleMania > Cena/Taker at WrestleMania

[Savio]

"She called you a faggot"

[Dark One]

Gotta gif of that entrance pose that was great.

https://thumbs.gfycat.com/JovialScratchyBrocketdeer-size_restricted.gif

[owenbrown]

well that backfired

[Anybody Thrilla]

Asuka has spoken English many times on WWE television, but OK.

[Dark One]

"She called you a faggot"

"She said you looked like a hybrid of a AT-ST and Moana"

[Anybody Thrilla]

Fuck, seriously, don't like Nia talk. Just let her wreck shit.

[Dark One]

https://media.giphy.com/media/4WHkXdDx8wjS0/giphy.gif

[Evil Vito]

"She called you a faggot"

"She said you like to munch carpet"

[slik]

This has been the best WWE RAW in ages (imo)!

[Emperor Smeat]

Would be funny if Asuka just started talking only in English after that failed attempt by Bliss.

[Anybody Thrilla]

This has been the best WWE RAW in ages (imo)!

Nothing awful so far.

[Anybody Thrilla]

Would be funny if Asuka just started talking only in English after that failed attempt by Bliss.

What language are the words "no one is ready for Asuka!", because she has certainly said that. And she spoke English to The Miz earlier. And she always speaks English all the time. No clue what Nia was talking about.

[Dark One]

What language are the words "no one is ready for Asuka!", because she has certainly said that. And she spoke English to The Miz earlier. And she always speaks English all the time. No clue what Nia was talking about.

No.

See.

Japanese people don't speak English.

[Dark One]

Nothing awful so far.

This is your fault.

[Anybody Thrilla]

No.

See.

Japanese people don't speak English.

Oh, my B

[Tom Guycott]

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-lang="en"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">Good news: <a href="https://twitter.com/mikethemiz?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@mikethemiz</a> is back as he’s been on a role with this heel run.<br>Bad news: a new Marine movie is coming out soon<a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/RAWTonight?src=hash&amp;ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">#RAWTonight</a></p>&mdash; WWE Creative Humor (@WWECreative_ish) <a href="https://twitter.com/WWECreative_ish/status/950453855115993089?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">January 8, 2018</a></blockquote>
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I'm not particularly a grammar nazi that has to step into every there/they're/their to put an asterisk, but it does kinda bug me when people interchange "role" and "roll"

[KIRA]

https://thumbs.gfycat.com/JovialScratchyBrocketdeer-size_restricted.gif

YES!

[Emperor Smeat]

What language are the words "no one is ready for Asuka!", because she has certainly said that. And she spoke English to The Miz earlier. And she always speaks English all the time. No clue what Nia was talking about.

She mixes in Japanese whenever she's pissed so I assume Nia means she never speaks in English when actually insulting someone. Whole thing was pretty dumb though.

[Anybody Thrilla]

It's funny when they're pantomiming in the back and all three of their mouths are moving at the same time. Just have an actual conversation, fuck.

[Anybody Thrilla]

I'm not particularly a grammar nazi that has to step into every there/they're/their to put an asterisk, but it does kinda bug me when people interchange "role" and "roll"

He is kinda playing a "role", though.

[KIRA]

Nia's only hope for survival is that Asuka never gets on her feet again

[Dark One]

It's funny when they're pantomiming in the back and all three of their mouths are moving at the same time. Just have an actual conversation, fuck.

No, man. That's how people who speak English talk. This is probably why you were confused about Asuka earlier.

[Evil Vito]

So AJ, Owens, and Zayn are booked for the WWE Title match and the US Title match is probably gonna be Roode/Mahal.

Think some of those guys are definitely gonna have to pull double duty, otherwise SmackDown's representation in the Rumble is gonna be pretty light. I mean I'm sure you can put in guys like the Usos or New Day but still very low on singles stars.

[Anybody Thrilla]

I have much to learn.

[rez]

no one wants to mix tag with bayley

[Tom Guycott]

Ooooooooooh. If this leads to Jason Jordan wearing tac gear in the near future, there's a slight chance he could be salvaged.

Out of sync, non-matching tactical gear. Like "police" (but made lighter so it blatantly shows up that it doesn't match on TV) blue or light digicam. With the D'Lo chest protector. Just all wrong, but he rocks it like he belongs. Like his "dad" with that little cowboy hat OR when he first got his head shaved and wore the wrestling helmet with the wig. In fact, if they're going to keep up the Angle is his father farce, they could make callbacks to those things.

[Evil Vito]

That would be an interesting poll if they hadn't already leaked in press releases that Joe was gonna be in the Mixed Match Challenge. Rigged poll.

[Dark One]

no one wants to mix tag with bayley

#BayleyNone

[Tom Guycott]

He is kinda playing a "role", though.

But you know that is not what they meant.

Same thing when "quoting" The Rock with "KNOW YOU'RE DAMN ROLL"... ugh.

[Dark One]

Out of sync, non-matching tactical gear. Like "police" (but made lighter so it blatantly shows up that it doesn't match on TV) blue or light digicam. With the D'Lo chest protector. Just all wrong, but he rocks it like he belongs. Like his "dad" with that little cowboy hat OR when he first got his head shaved and wore the wrestling helmet with the wig. In fact, if they're going to keep up the Angle is his father farce, they could make callbacks to those things.

https://thumbs.ebaystatic.com/d/l225/m/m_yyNTk6RYOgz1DWby2sAJw.jpg

[rez]

WWE with their history rewriting.

[Anybody Thrilla]

All of these people talking about "teams", and we get a total of five entrances.

[KIRA]

"The aftershocks of what these guys created"(Which we cant ever directly reference) can still be felt in Japan

[Dark One]

Seth and Roman should have come out first, stood at the top of the ramp, and then started walking down without JJ once JJ's music hit.

[Tom Guycott]

https://thumbs.gfycat.com/JovialScratchyBrocketdeer-size_restricted.gif

Okay, this is now officially better than The York Foundation.

[KIRA]

Saving their boos up love you Memphis

[Dark One]

See...

This is why they kept saying "The Original Shield" over and over and over a couple of months ago.

[Dark One]

Corey Graves taking over Booker's "Drunk Uncle" role.

[slik]

Braun Strowman should star the Grappling Hook Club

[KIRA]

Corey Graves taking over Booker's "Drunk Uncle" role.

He had to get drunk seeing as the show kicked off with Roman talking.

[slik]

Jason Jordan being 'built up' as a uber-heel so well

[KIRA]

:lol: Jordan moving Rollins over to celebrate


guys hes actually really good at this role(sorry roll)

[Tom Guycott]

That would be an interesting poll if they hadn't already leaked in press releases that Joe was gonna be in the Mixed Match Challenge. Rigged poll.

Anytime there is a poll, I can't unsee that one where all the "popular" choices led to a vote for Roman Reigns... and you could see the divide where the selections led to that one line.

[Emperor Smeat]

So AJ, Owens, and Zayn are booked for the WWE Title match and the US Title match is probably gonna be Roode/Mahal.

Think some of those guys are definitely gonna have to pull double duty, otherwise SmackDown's representation in the Rumble is gonna be pretty light. I mean I'm sure you can put in guys like the Usos or New Day but still very low on singles stars.
Smackdown had similar problems last year although they only really need 4 notable stars and already have two at the moment with Orton and Nakamura.

WWE could throw a curveball and have Styles lose the WWE title but win the Rumble to give a refreshing take on the usual post-Rumble storyline.

[Droford]

3 guys in tutus could be the Ballet club

[Anybody Thrilla]

:lol: Jordan moving Rollins over to celebrate


guys hes actually really good at this role(sorry roll)

He's great. The next generation of it, even.

Even when he was babyface, it's not like he was doing anything wrong. Not sure why people turned on him, but I guess I'm glad they did.

[GD]

Just tuned in, this sounds like a cool main event on paper.

[GD]

COHESIVE UNIT!

[Tom Guycott]

See...

This is why they kept saying "The Original Shield" over and over and over a couple of months ago.

I guarantee that it isn't.

That's like saying they planned all along to slide Daniel Bryan into the WM main event that year, even though they went as far in the other direction as to try to turn him heel in the Wyatt Family.

[GD]

COHESIVE

[KIRA]

Just tuned in, this sounds like a cool main event on paper.

You also missed the greatest entrance ever

[slik]

Just tuned in, this sounds like a cool main event on paper.

go back and watch braun injuring brock and brock being stretchered out of the arena

also -- Enzo 'busted open bad'

cool nia jax/asuka confrontration

also The Miz/Miztourage

[Anybody Thrilla]

Seems to be a lot of rest holds for a six-man tag.

[Anybody Thrilla]

They don't mind that Rollins and Balor both do the "Slingblade"?

[KIRA]

We have to hit the name Balor really hard so we don't get sued

don't you dare fuck it up cole

[Lock Jaw]

I always seem to "lose all interest" in watching the TV by the main event of Monday Night RAW.

This might be a good match right now, but I am barely looking at it.

[Emperor Smeat]

How Rollins still hasn't made the Suplex-Falcon Arrow combo his actual finisher is a mystery. The Kneemaker is too terrible looking to be finisher worthy.

Also have a sinking feeling Jordan is probably getting the Ziggler 2014 treatment once this Shield association is over. He's only getting this main event type push because he's just replacing what was meant for Ambrose and not because WWE planned this for him.

[Evil Vito]

He's great. The next generation of it, even.

Even when he was babyface, it's not like he was doing anything wrong. Not sure why people turned on him, but I guess I'm glad they did.

I think people turned on it because it was just an objectively daft storyline and they tried to make him a total goody two shoes babyface and he wasn't believable in the role. Miz has been making magic with guys for years and even his promos with Jordan sucked ass.

Jordan's way better in his current delusional role.

[Dark One]

They don't mind that Rollins and Balor both do the "Slingblade"?

At some point, one of them is going to go for the Slingblade and the other is going to counter with the Slingblade, and they're going to spiral up into heaven together.

[rez]

Yeah!

[KIRA]

Thats the name of Rollins Finisher ?

he couldve picked a name outta the 2K create a finisher that was better than that.

[Droford]

psuedo bullet club beats fake shield

[Dark One]

GOOD BROTHERS BROTHERIN' LIKE ONLY GOOD BROTHERS CAN

[Dark One]

WHAT A TIME TO BE ALIVE

GALLOWS AND ANDERSON (AND FINN) WIN THE MAIN EVENT OF RAW.

BALOR CLUB 4 LIFE

[Evil Vito]

This all plays in to Rollins telling Jordan earlier that he "needs to work on his timing".

Two total fuck ups based on bad Jordan timing.

[KIRA]

How Rollins still hasn't made the Suplex-Falcon Arrow combo his actual finisher is a mystery. The Kneemaker is too terrible looking to be finisher worthy.

THANK YOU :yes:

[Lock Jaw]

Miz looks more "generic" with his haircut..... not good......

[Emperor Smeat]

Not a good night for Reigns. First he loses to the Club of Good Bros and now got beaten up by the Not So Mean Street Posse.

[Savio]

Just doing what the shield did to him.

[Lock Jaw]

I dunno why, but his longer hair made him look "distinctive" and now he just looks like "an average dude"

[Anybody Thrilla]

Not a bad Raw. Set a couple things up.

[KIRA]

Christ Wyatt and Dallas look like twins

[Evil Vito]

Christ Wyatt and Dallas look like twins

I can actually see Wyatt abducting Dallas eventually to do a WyDalRotundos vs. Woken Hardys match.

[Dark One]

This Enzo Straight to the Source is amazing.

Work. Shoot. I don't care. Enzo is the greatest heel in the history of professional wrestling.

[Dark One]

Enzo just compared himself to Ric Flair.

I'm not convinced this whole thing isn't a Kaufman-esque performance piece.

[Dark One]

That was the most bewildering 20 minutes of my life.

After watching that, I am questioning reality.

[Droford]

Miz and Maryse are getting their own reality show on USA

Miz and Mrs

[Anybody Thrilla]

Thanks for the reminder, definitely gonna check it out after I watch a little more of The Office.

[Dark One]

Thanks for the reminder, definitely gonna check it out after I watch a little more of The Office.

This GIF accurately summarizes what it will be like watching it:

https://78.media.tumblr.com/f7d014ab3154f63fa7a200fddb860c39/tumblr_ozqidoszWX1shsq9jo2_540.gif

[GD]

Hardy’s tan

[Tom Guycott]

https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/gravityfalls/images/0/07/S1e1_mabel_choosing_grappling_hook.png/revision/latest/scale-to-width-down/350?cb=20120621205719
Next week, Braun starts wearing different sweaters to every RAW.

[Emperor Smeat]

RAW ended up doing worse this week with the NCAA Football title game as the main reason why. Didn't get hammered as badly for the demo rankings compared to last week but did end up being lower than same week last year by a sizeable amount.

Monday’s Raw drew an average of 2,759,000 viewers, down from last week’s 2,865,000 viewers ...

Raw was #6, 9 and 10 on cable in the 18-49 demographic for the night, with college football stuff and VH1’s “Love and Hip Hop” ahead of it.

Hourly breakdown:

8PM: 2,993,000
9PM: 2,784,000
10PM: 2,502,000

[Ol Dirty Dastard]

Droford would you use your super el bino powers to stwal maryse from the miz? Then u can have your own reality show called "Dro and the Ho"

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

I think Deville has some real potential.

She seems a little more feminine than she has in past. Maybe her hair?

[Heisenberg]

Thank Tatanka that Vanguard1 wasn’t harmed during the grappling hook segment

[Anybody Thrilla]

She seems a little more feminine than she has in past. Maybe her hair?

Definitely her hair.

[Stickman]

That was the most bewildering 20 minutes of my life.

After watching that, I am questioning reality.

After watching that, what little interest I had in Enzo is completely gone. He comes off as a piece of trash human being. I thought he was just an annoying small man syndrome kind of guy, now he comes off as a complete waste of life.

[#1-norm-fan]

I just watched the Enzo thing. He definitely comes off as an obnoxious piece of shit. Exactly what a heel in 2018 should be.

[Simple Fan]

After watching that, what little interest I had in Enzo is completely gone. He comes off as a piece of trash human being. I thought he was just an annoying small man syndrome kind of guy, now he comes off as a complete waste of life.

Sounds like he's done his job pretty well then. Enzo has been killing it since Cass got hurt.

[Anybody Thrilla]

I just watched the Enzo thing. He definitely comes off as an obnoxious piece of shit. Exactly what a heel in 2018 should be.

RIGHT.

I saw it as a kayfabe revival. He knows that he's limited, so he's carving his niche. Good on him to stay relevant.

[#1-norm-fan]

From everything I've heard, he is a pretty unlikable guy. But he obviously knows what he's doing in an interview like that.

[Evil Vito]

Honestly, given that Enzo went heel within weeks of his feud with Cass ending, I think the team should've just stuck together as a heel act.

Cass returning and flattening cruiserweights while Enzo hides is totally something I can see happening.

[Anybody Thrilla]

From everything I've heard, he is a pretty unlikable guy. But he obviously knows what he's doing in an interview like that.

I'll reserve judgment until I meet him myself.