Parody: WWE ROSTER CUTS.

[Loose Cannon]

Hey, I haven't done one of these in a while. I think it's time though. :D


WWE ROSTER CUTS


, Johnny Ace, Vince, HHH, Steph, Shane, Taker and JR all are sitting around a table in a pretty decent sized room


Vince: Alright Gentlemen, as you may or may not know.


HHH. Probably Not :shifty:


Vince :lol: ......good one son. Well as you may Not know, we've been having some big money issues the past few months.


Steph :yes: :D



Vince: It seems I've been paying our superstars a little too much money



HHH and Taker :shifty:


Vince: Well, here's my plan. We're going to make some roster cuts right now. We will go through some of your suggestions about who should be cut and then we will make our decisions.


Steph: You mean mine and Hunter's decision, right daddy? :D


Vince: :kiss:


Shane: :nono:


Vince: Um Shane, is there a problem?.....Great, why don't you run and get everybody some coffee. Thanks kid. :y:


*Shane storms out


Ace: Okay Vince, you want to start with the Heat and Velocity Rosters first?



Vince: The Who? http://www.showyourmoon.com/kapoutland/phpBB2/images/smiles/confused.gif


Taker and HHH: :rofl:


JR: SMACKDOWN REBOUND KING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Whole Room: :wtf:


ACE: You know Vince, the two shows on the weekends that don't draw a lot of viewers.



Steph: Cancel both shows and release all those guys DADDY. YAYYYY: :love:



Vince: HMMMMMM, Nah, not this time :naughty: But some of these superstars on these so called "WWE SHOWS" will have to go.



HHH: Heyyyyyy UHHHHHH Vince UHHHHH?


Vince: Yes Son


HHH: Well UHHHHHH, Test UHHHHH, He's Just Not Cutting the Mustard UHHHHH. I think he needs to go UHHHHHHHH.



JR: BROKEN NECK... DAMM HIM TO HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Taker: :wtf: Someone check JR's battery dammit. :mad:


Vince: Well son, he's got a broken neck. That might be a tad bit unethical to fire him.........



Wait, what am I saying here...:lol: Ethics :lol: TEST: YOU'RE FIRED :rant: hahahaha. That's 1



HHH :cool: Good Choice UHHHHHHHHH



Steph: Huuurayyyyyy for daddy :love:



JR: DAMMIT, HE'S GOT A FAMILY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Taker: :mad:


Ace: Well Vince, since you're firing people who aren't even working cause of problems, Billy Gunn has got a drug problem. What do you think?


Vince: Well since we have a no drug policy around here and......



HHH :shifty:



Vince: ....I can't really keep guys around that continue to abuse our system.....Billy Gunn, YOU'RE.......WAIT WAIT, I can't do it. Billy has been with the company for years.......


WAIT, WHO GIVES A DAM, YOU'RE FIRRRRRRRRED :mad: hahahaha That's 2


HHH: I saw A-Train popping pills yestersay.


VINCE: FIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 3:y:



***Steph Claps


HHH :cool:


JR: HIP HOP HIPPO, DE-RAILER... NO NO, DON'T DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Taker: Hey, A-Train was my freind :mad:


TAKER: Oh yeah :mad: Well I hear Gail Kim and Nidia think Steph is a WHORE


VINCE: WHAT???? FIRRRRRRRREDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD :mad: :mad: :mad: THAT'S 5


HHH: :eek: :eek: :eek: DAMMIT TAKER, I wasn't finished with them yet :mad:


Steph: What Hunter? :D


HHH: Nothing baby :shifty:


Taker :lol:


JR: NO GOOD JEZEBEL, GET HER AWAY FROM HIM!!!!!!!!!!!



ACE: :wtf:.....UMMMMM, OOOOKAYYY. Well we haven't really eliminated anybody from eathier Heat or Velocity yet.


Vince: So, who the hell wrestlers on these shows Johnny?


ACE: Well we got........



*Chuck Palumbo walks in



Chuckie P: Hey guys, sorry to bother you. But I was just wanted your feedback on my new gimmick I debuted on HEAT THIS WEEK



VINCE: WHAT THE FUCK? :lol: YOU'RE FIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEDD :lol:


HHH and Taker: :lol:



STEPH :wave:


JR: NATURAL BORN THRILLER CHUCK AND BILLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Palumbo It was Billy and Chuck :'(


*Palumbo leaves.

[Loose Cannon]

Vince: Who the hell was that guy? WHATEVER. Let's move on.


ACE: UMMM Vince, I hope you know you just let Billy and Chuck go. They were a tag team here once........


HHH :wtf:


Ace: .......and they might sign with TNA and use that.


VINCE: TNA? What are they going to become pornstars now? :lol:


Steph: YAYYYY FOR PORNO DADDY :love:


Vince: Yes hunny. :naughty:


ACE: Okay, well, Rodney Mack was also on Heat this week Vince.



Vince: And Who is this now?



HHH: OHHHHHHH UHHHHHH Vince, YOU UHHHHH gave him a little Push once, but he didn't UHHHHHHH catch on with the fans UHHHHHH.


VINCE: HMMMMMM, FAILED PUSH, HEAT.....Ummmmm....


HHH: Oh and He's Black



VINCE: FIRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEED :mad: That's........fuck, lost count :mad:



Taker :lol: He has a wife that works here too Vince.



Vince: Which one?




Taker: Jazz


Vince: Well she doesn't work here anymore. HAHAHAHA FIIIIIIRRRRRRRREDD :lol:


JR: BLACKOUT BLACKOUT BLACKOUT.....BACK THE MACK........BAH GAWD IT'S JAZZ, WHERE''D SHE COME FROM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


STEPH: Daddy, JR is making me a scared.



Vince: Jesus, where is Shane with our coffee. JR needs new batteries :mad:


ACE: Okay Vince, well we need to cut someone from Velocity then.


Vince: Jesus. who the fuck made these shows?


STEPH :wave:


VINCE: Alright let me see that list......


**Vince Closes eyes and puts his finger on one of the names...


VINCE: OKAY.. JOHNNY STROMBOLI......YOU'RE FIIIIIIIIIIIIRED :mad:


HHH: Stromboli :lol: WAIT :mad:........ I NEVER HAD THE CHANCE TO BURY HIM :mad: DAMMIT.


TAKER: OH, I GOT HIM :cool:


HHH: Alright :cool:


VINCE: PHEWWWW, I'm Tired. Okay, One More Guys. Who Shall It Be?


Taker: Y2J's Not Cutting the Mustard UHHHHHHHHHH.


VINCE: NO NO NO, Benoit is pretty good.


JR: RABBBID WOLVERINE.....HE'S FINALLY DONE IT...FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!


*Rico walks in w/ Miss Jackie


Rico: Hi, Excuse me Vince, but there was a little problem with my pay check this week. You see, I'm suppossed to get $2,000 more.


* Vince looks at check


VINCE: :eek: What? We are paying you this much?


RICO: It's the Bare Minimum Vince.


Vince: Oh Well in that case......LET'S MAKE IT EVEN LESS. I don't know who you are, BUT YOU'RE FIRRRRRRREEEEEDDDD......:lol: But let the girl stay here. :naughty:


Rico leaves crying


Steph: DADDY IS THE GREATEST DADDY IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD :love:



HHH :lol: Did you see that guy? He looked LIKE A FAG. :lol:



Ace: It was his gimmick Hunter. It was actually over too.



HHH: WAS OVER :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:



JR: UNORTHODOX STYLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!STRANGE ONE THAT RICO!!!!!!!!



Vince: Okay Boys, that's it for today. I'll see all of you later.



* Everyone leaves except Vince and Miss Jackie


*4 minutes later in the same room


VINCE: Oh Yeah, Who's the Genetic Jackhammer Baby?


Miss Jackie: *cough cough* you are Mr. McMahon


END OF DAY.

[Funky Fly]

ROFL

BTW, at the shane storms out part, you put [i/] and screwed up the tag, but I fixed it.

[El Santo]

:lol:

Excellent.

[James Steele]

LMAO at the "YAAAAAAAY FOR PORNO DADDY!" line.


You sir are my hero!

[Mr. Nerfect]

LMAO! Maybe you should do one where they move the brands back together. :y:

[Mr. Nerfect]

I liked the way you made Steph seem really....off....mentally, and had that Undertaker/Triple H thing, as well as making Johnny Ace and Shane McMahon the only compotent people there.

[Innovator]

BAH GAWD LCKO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[The Cerebral Assassin]

Funny shit. :)

[LK]

lol

[Bad Guy]

HHH: How's it going Dad?

Vince: Pretty good, Son.

HHH: You know Dad, I was thinking that the roster is way too oversized, and one of these guys might actually win my belt. (snickers under breathe). So I'm going to call today roster cut day.

Vince: Whatever you say, you're the boss.

HHH: Damn straight I am. Hey Dad, did you that..

*Shane walks into room*

Shane: Hey Dad.

Vince: Who the fuck are you?!

Shane: Your son...

Vince: :?:

Shane: Shane. Shane McMahon.

*Vince looks over at HHH*

Vince: Oh.. oh yeah. You.

Shane: Anyways Dad, I was thinking that since you are retiring soon and all..

Vince: Actually, what's your name again? Sam? My Son HHH here will be taking over the company when I retire.

Shane: What?! What?! I can't believe this! I've waited my whole life and..

HHH: yooooooooure fiiiired shane!!!

*Chris Benoit walks into room*

Benoit: Hey Vince, I was thinking that I could get another World Heavyweight Title shot? This time though the fans won't get tired of it because

HHH: No.. not going to work Chris.

Benoit: And why not?

HHH: Cause yoooooure fiiired Chris!!!

Vince: Are.. are you sure you wanted to do that? He was one of our top draws and ratings have been low as of late.

HHH: Shut up.

Vince: Yes sir.

HHH: You know Vincent, I was thinking that I might go for the intercontinetal championship tonight.

Vince: But.. that already belongs to

HHH: I don't care. Whoever has it make sure he jobs to me tonight.

*HHH goes on to win the intercontinental championship*

Later that night...

HHH: Boy Vince, this sure is the life.

*Vince looking at the ratings*

Vince: WTF IS THIS? Ratings went down again?!

HHH: Vince.. you know I think I also want to go for the tag team titles as well next week.

Vince: Ok, who is going to be your partner?

HHH: Nobody. Just me. Whoever are the tag champs by then make sure they lose to me in a handicap match.

*HHH goes on to win the match and now has the World Heavyweight Championship, Intercontinetnal championship, and both tag team championships*

*Trish walks through door and HHH sees the Women's title. His eyes light up*

HHH: Trish... yooooooure fiiiiiiired!!!

*Trish walks out crying and HHH picks up Women's title*

HHH: You know, I dont feel like i have enough belts Vince. Make the WWE Championship come from smackdown and over here to RAW.

*JBL walks through door*

JBL: Vince, what the hell's going on here?

HHH: Hey, nice belt. yoooooure fiiiiired bradshaw!!!

3 days later WWE goes out of business.

[Corkscrewed]

^ Kinda died on the second half.

But LMAO at Steph.

[Bad Guy]

yeah it sucked. meh.

[Evil Vito]

<font color=goldenrod>LMAO</font>

[Shaggy]

Funnies thing ever......LOL LOL LOL

[Triple H]

That was lame and overdone.

[Marcyo]

:rofl: Lmao

[Danny Electric]

That was lame and overdone.

Shut up you dick.

[Loose Cannon]

That was lame and overdone.

Thanks Hunter :love: :love: :love: I love your wrestling :y: :y:

[Loose Cannon]

Oh and Thanks to everyone else for the kind words besides Hunter :y:

[123 kid]

BTW: :lol: at LC's parody, well done :y:

[Triple H]

Thanks Hunter :love: :love: :love: I love your wrestling :y: :y:

Thanks.

Now just for you, I'll put myself on Raw 10 extra minutes Monday night. :y:

[Triple H]

STFU big nose, I'd like to see you do better, now go back to ass-licking Vince :)



You're just jealous that you can't be as successful as me.

Now go back to your job at McDonalds little boy.

[Triple H]

Shut up you dick.

Shut up?

Do you know who I am?

No one, especially some little internet geek, tells me what to do.

I answer to NO ONE.

*spits out water*

[Splaya]

Can we get to the banning already?

[Triple H]

Can we get to the banning already?

Once again, I have done nothing wrong.

I say how that parody wasn't funny (which is the truth) and you guys unfairly attact me.

If anyone should be banned is the people who told me to shut up.

[Danny Electric]

Shut up?

Do you know who I am?

No one, especially some little internet geek, tells me what to do.

I answer to NO ONE.

*spits out water*

I feel sorry for you. I truly do.
Do me favour, get AIDS and die.

[Triple H]

I feel sorry for you. I truly do.
Do me favour, get AIDS and die.

I think you should be banned.

[Danny Electric]

I think you should be banned.

I think you should be castrated.

[Loose Cannon]

Fuckin Christ. Bye Bye you Piece of Shit.

[HankScorpio]

It only takes one big nosed dick to ruin a thread

[Loose Cannon]

it will be cleaned up in a sec. I'm doing 12 things at once right now though.

[thecc]

Can we get to the banning already?D-VON GET THE BAN HAMMER!!!!

http://home.rochester.rr.com/enb/banhammer.jpg
Btw LC i really enjoyed that parody :y:

[MVP]

ROFL at the whole thread, especially JR.

[123 kid]

You're just jealous that you can't be as successful as me.

Now go back to your job at McDonalds little boy.

:roll: go back to boning vince.

[Triple H]

That was lame.

[Semetery]

LOL! I loved that first parody, but the second one was just too... poor effort.

[John la Rock]

the jokes are so old but still funny

[Loose Cannon]

ROFL at the whole thread, especially JR.

:D JR was my favorite one too. So was Steph. :y:

I mean how many times did Jazz come back from an injury and JR would be like "It's Jazz, where'd she come from." :lol:

[Savio]

I liked every thing exceot steph.

[Funky Fly]

LOL @ LC's quality control.