Kane Knight
12-23-2005, 07:57 PM
In a special Holiday "Ruse Report."
Santa comes a bit early tonight, as Batista battles JBL to determine whether we call it "Christmas" or "The Holidays." Expect special appearances by Mick Foley (Santa Claus), Rey Mysterio (Santa's elf), Kane (The Christmas Creature), and Carlito (The Hannukah Bush).
Tim White is, in fact alive and well. The plans are to retun him to the screen in 3 months--with half a face. He will cost Undertaker the match the week before Wrestlemania, claiming his botched suicide was all the fault of the Deadman. This will begin a feud building up to Summerslam, where Tim White will have mind games played on him every Velocity. This is all part of the Undertaker's plan to stop touring without retiring.
Ric Flair did it again. The night after the "Tribute to the Troops" aired, he got Gene Snitsky drunk and enlisted him in the Army. The WWE was forced to leave without him, though one recruiter was quoted as saying "This donation is proof that the WWE does not support the troops."
Batman has sued Vince McMahon for his allegations that the Dark Knight was behind the Montreal Screwjob. More on this next week, Same Ruse time, Same Ruse Channel.
WWE's Secret Santa Program was ruined this year, by several of the WWE's favored talent. Bob Holly broke Juventud's arm when he drew out Holly's gift, saying he hadn't earned the right to Secret Santa, and would have to pay his dues like the rest of the lockerroom. Matt Hardy was pissed when the Undertaker wouldn't put over his gift, and Nobody would accept Steven Richards' gift, as they couldn't verify he still worked there. Shawn Michaels lost his smile when his gift turned out to be a dradle.
In related news, Randy Orton is evidently barred from Secret Santa next year.
And that's all for this week, folks! Stay tuned for your regular edition of the Ruse Report at the usual time (Whenever I feel like it)
The Ruse Report--9 out of 10 doctors agree the number 1 source in WWE news also fights prostate cancer! www.rusereport.com
(Sorry it's a bit rushed...Wanted to finish before Smackdown! Came on...)
Santa comes a bit early tonight, as Batista battles JBL to determine whether we call it "Christmas" or "The Holidays." Expect special appearances by Mick Foley (Santa Claus), Rey Mysterio (Santa's elf), Kane (The Christmas Creature), and Carlito (The Hannukah Bush).
Tim White is, in fact alive and well. The plans are to retun him to the screen in 3 months--with half a face. He will cost Undertaker the match the week before Wrestlemania, claiming his botched suicide was all the fault of the Deadman. This will begin a feud building up to Summerslam, where Tim White will have mind games played on him every Velocity. This is all part of the Undertaker's plan to stop touring without retiring.
Ric Flair did it again. The night after the "Tribute to the Troops" aired, he got Gene Snitsky drunk and enlisted him in the Army. The WWE was forced to leave without him, though one recruiter was quoted as saying "This donation is proof that the WWE does not support the troops."
Batman has sued Vince McMahon for his allegations that the Dark Knight was behind the Montreal Screwjob. More on this next week, Same Ruse time, Same Ruse Channel.
WWE's Secret Santa Program was ruined this year, by several of the WWE's favored talent. Bob Holly broke Juventud's arm when he drew out Holly's gift, saying he hadn't earned the right to Secret Santa, and would have to pay his dues like the rest of the lockerroom. Matt Hardy was pissed when the Undertaker wouldn't put over his gift, and Nobody would accept Steven Richards' gift, as they couldn't verify he still worked there. Shawn Michaels lost his smile when his gift turned out to be a dradle.
In related news, Randy Orton is evidently barred from Secret Santa next year.
And that's all for this week, folks! Stay tuned for your regular edition of the Ruse Report at the usual time (Whenever I feel like it)
The Ruse Report--9 out of 10 doctors agree the number 1 source in WWE news also fights prostate cancer! www.rusereport.com
(Sorry it's a bit rushed...Wanted to finish before Smackdown! Came on...)