RAW Captions [3-30-2004]

[Corkscrewed]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/01.jpg
OMG, that has to be the funniest picture EVER! They've had some awesome ones lately!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/02.jpg


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http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/27.jpg


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/28.jpg


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg

[Corkscrewed]

And that Christian pic his hilarious... damn, this is an awesome set!

I'll be back later.

[tucsonspeed6]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/25.jpg
Trust me, man...roids will make it this little!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/24.jpg
Ref: Nah Nah!
Bruce Banner (Kane): Trust me, you don't want to make me.....ANGRY!!!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/06.jpg
Shelton: Dude! Seriously, if I don't find my contact lens my mom's gonna kill me.

HHH: Aw geez....if you get grounded I won't get to stay over this weekend!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/14.jpg
Batista: What do you mean there's a UFO behind me?
Nitro: Like I'm gonna fall for that one again!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/20.jpg
Christian: "Aw yeah! Keep diggin, girl. Don't mind that loose change. I'm sure you'll find something more interesting in there than that!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg
"Hunter...we just checked our numbers, and it turns out that the internet fans DON'T like you after all."
or
"Hunter, I hate to tell you this, but your wife.....she's kinda a slut."
or
Ref: "Hunter, I have some bad news about why we wanted you to job to shelton...
HHH: Well come on! Don't beat around the bush!
Ref: *chuckles* Uh...it's kinda funny you should mention that when we're in a conversation about you, Shelton, and Steph...
HHH: I didn't say anything about Steph....OH GOD!
or (best one of all)
Keeping with the "THere's something about Mary" theme of the new WWE, HHH demonstrates what an ideal character should be like by zipping his balls up in his pants zipper.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg

Shelton: Steph told me about your "little" problem...heh heh heh

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/16.jpg
JR: Tonight we have a special guest in attendance: The wisdom cube from Aqua Teen Hunger Force."
Voice in the Croud: "KEEP HONKING, I'M STILL LOADING MY GUN!!!"

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/17.jpg
Austin: "...and that's when she started givin me some lip"
Shelton: "Dude, I figured you wouldn't smell like booze until after you went out to the ring..."
Austin: "...so I says 'womin...you just broke the law!'"

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/13.jpg

Shawn: Ok...DUDE! Only GOD can touch me like that!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/22.jpg
Kane soon realized that he had drank an entire bucket of his own barf for nothing...the bit had been done before.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/12.jpg
Shawn: Keep away! Keep away!
Benoit: Dude, in order to play keep away, you have to have more than one person....and the object of it is to actually keep the title away from me, not hand it to me!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/15.jpg
Benoit: "The ex-boyfriend off of "Meet the Parents""
Nitro: "...I still won't let you win!"
Benoit: "There's gotta be some Ben Stiller movie character I can base myself off of to make it around here!"
Shawn: "Dude! Zoolander! Zoolander!"

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/03.jpg
THe match really went to hell when the swarm of bees attacked Nidia.

[OssMan]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/01.jpg

Tajiri does his "Triple H Getting Drafted to Smackdown" impression, while Coach does his "Batista Watching Triple H Get Drafted to Smackdown" impression.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/11.jpg

Shawn: Flair! Don't let the aliens take you!
Flair: Noooooooo!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/14.jpg

Nitro: No! HE's a homo!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/22.jpg

Kane: Holy crap! This sour apple Evolution Kool-Aid really does work!


Eh....these suck. I'll do more later.

[Savio]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg
Even hunter can't believe its not butter.
http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/06.jpg
The game changes his intials to KKK.
http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/03.jpg
I remember this hair from smack down.....*flash back*
http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/021204/images/19.jpg
Nidia: Molly! you stole a-trains hair!
Molly: :shifty:

[FearedSanctity]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/25.jpg

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg

:lol: :lol: :lol:

These two write themselves

[Savio]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/25.jpghttp://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg
It was close but ever since Andre died a white man never won the lenth contest.
http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg
Shelt: mines still bigger
http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg
No seriously big shows is only this big.
http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg
Shelton shows the average height of a china man.

[Xero]

First captions...

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/01.jpg
As Coach puts on a scene from his school play, Tajiri thought it sucked, so he spat on him.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/02.jpg
Ref: **Stares at Nidia's breasts**
Nidia: What the hell are you looking at?
Ref: Theres a... uh... spot on your shirt... Im trying to burn it off w/ my heat ray vision...
Nidia: Pervert...

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/03.jpg
Eww! Eww! Get it off!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/04.jpg
Worst Elvis Lip ever...

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/05.jpg
Triple H went too far, now he was stealing the spot light of other people's ENTRANCES!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/06.jpg
Trips: **Sniff** Do you smell that?
Shelton: **Cough cough** Yeah, WTF is that!?

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/07.jpg
Sitting on the toilet whistling while wrestling a match... All this and much more on 60 Minuites!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/08.jpg
Vince was starting to get cheap with the Pyros... HBK had to throw the sparkles in the air now...

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/09.jpg
Lillian: You stole the cookies from the cookie jar!
Johnny: Wasnt me!
HBK and Chris: THEN WHO!?

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/10.jpg
Worst Sharpshooter ever...

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/11.jpg
HBK was SO pissed with Ric's boot color that he threw him accross the ring, and proceeded to spray paint them pink with little bunnies.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/12.jpg
HBK: Uh, here...
Chris: Why are you standing like that? Whats wrong with me!?
HBK: Uh, well, if you can kill Ric with your breath, I wouldnt be too hard...

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/13.jpg
Johnny just couldnt believe it... Shawn chose Chris over him!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/14.jpg
Dave: I won it!
Johnny: No, I won it!
Lillian: Well, who won the burping contest... You or you?
Both: ME! Rabblerabblerabble

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/15.jpg
Chris: You okay!?
HBK: AHH! YOU KILLED AGIAN! AHHH! **Runs**

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/16.jpg
Shawn: Point to your kn... sky!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/17.jpg
Shelton: Im proud to be American, AND Im gonna beat Trips tonight! Can tonight get any better?!
Austin: Heh, I wouldnt look behind you...
(Moments later Triple H comes in from behind and cripples Shelton)

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/18.jpg
Trish: Cheeeeeese!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/19.jpg
Trish: CHEESE DAMN IT! TAKE THE DAMN PICTURE!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/20.jpg
Christian: There there, we'll get Chris for running over Foofoo...
Trish (Crying and getting her breath): Then... Can.. You... Get... Me... A... New... One?!
Christian: 'Course!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/21.jpg
Kissy time!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/22.jpg
Kane didnt believe Tajiri when he said that Kane could puke on himself... Now he was a believer...

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/23.jpg
Man, Hacksaw Jim Duggan shrunk!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/24.jpg
Kane was pissed at Tajiri... Now he had to take a SECOND show this month!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/25.jpg
Trips: Im telling you... She stuffs her bras and she's really THIIIISS small!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg
Shelton: This small? HAHAHAHA!
Trips: I didnt say it was funny :(

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/27.jpg
Trips: Dude, Mike... Im seeing WWE logos on your hand agian...
Mike: You've been with RVD agian, havent you...

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/28.jpg
The crab claw growing out of Shelton's arm didnt phase him... He had beaten Triple H, and now he's going to Disney Land! Besides, with that crab claw, he could get to the front of the lines by saying hes crippled!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg
Trips: EWWWW! THATS WHAT THE TAPE LOOKS LIKE!? EWWWW!

[Corkscrewed]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/01.jpg
Coach paid dearly for making fun of Shang Tsung's new haircut.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/02.jpg
No one escped from... THE ARMPIT TICKLER!!!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/03.jpg
Nidia was understandably freaked out when It Jr. flew out and attacked her.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/04.jpg
And when It Jr. pounced on Molly... well... lets just say things got a little ugly.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/05.jpg
The devil that he was, HHH waited until Hurricane was busy engaged in battle with Steven Richards before he made his surprise ambush.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/06.jpg
Lice inspector Triple H could be a bit violent at times.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/07.jpg
*Rhyno enters the ring*
Rhyno: "All right, another match on TV!"
*DING DING DING!*
Rhyno: "Hey! My opponent's Lance! This should be fast."
*DING DING DING!*
Announcer: "And the winner of the match, RHYNO!!!"
Rhyno: "Wow, that was fast."

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/08.jpg
Shawn: "Damn, I knew I shouldn't have had that chili Bret sent me."

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/09.jpg
Yeah, Johnny Ace/Blaze/Spade wanted to be slick an all, but this was no time to be trying to convince the ladies about your penis size.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/10.jpg
There was a reason Shawn and Ric never played Twister with each other...

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/11.jpg
Knowing Flair never got over the top rope, Benoit was nice enough to help him out.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/12.jpg
As Michael's handed Benoit the tag title, he used a deft maneuver of the Force to steal Benoit's World Heavyweight Title. Master Helmsley would have his precious back.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/13.jpg
Joke was on Michaels, though, as Benoit hugged him and taped a sign that said: "Ha ha, Hunter, this one's made of chocolate."

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/14.jpg
Johnny: "Dude!"
Batista: "Dude!"
Johnny: "Dude!"
Batista: "Dude!"
Johnny: "Rockin' on the air guitar dude!"
Batista: "Yeah, dude, we are like... totally the man! Or the men! Dude!"
Johnny: "Dude!"
Batista: "Dude!"
Flair (behind them): "Um... guys? Match?"

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/15.jpg
Benoit: "You stupid excuse for a Hebner! You're supposed to ring the bell whenever someone's locked in a submission move!"
Michaels: "Yeah! Now get that straight before you screw it up when I put Benoit in the Crossface at Backlash!"
Benoit: "Yeah! Wait, what?"

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/16.jpg
RAW was momentarily interrupted by two exhibitionists who put Lance Storm to shame.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/17.jpg
Austin: "Heheh.. and then she said, 'No! I'm not your bitch!' and I said 'Shut up, bitch!' and she's like 'It's over!' and I'm like 'You're breaking my law, bitch!' and she's like 'This isn't wrestling, you moron!' so I stunned her and drank six bears, and when she got up, I stunned her again!' Heheheheh..."
Benjamin: "Um, Steve, you're still drunk aren't you?"
Austin: "...and then the cops decided to stop by for some reason..."

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/18.jpg
You couldn't see in this picture, but Trish has a midget under her podium.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/19.jpg
I got nothing.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/20.jpg
Christian was busy tenderly consoling Trish until he stepped back and realized he'd been holding Dustin Runnels, sans gold paint, all this time.

OR

Poor midcarders... even in their dreams they get buried.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/21.jpg
Apparently having not learned Coach's lesson, Kane paid the price when he teased Shang Tsung about his new crop as well.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/22.jpg
Introducing Coppertone's NEW Midcard Hell Strength Suntan Lotion! For when you need protection against the EXTREME burn!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/23.jpg
Kane was just as shocked as everyone else. An overflow of recent jobbing had reduced Triple H into Hunter HOBO Helmsley!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/24.jpg
Hulk... getting... angry...

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/25.jpg
Triple H: "Tiny wang! Tiny wang!"

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg
Shelton: "Actually, I shared some company with Steph earlier today, and revealed that it is YOU who has the tiny wang!"

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/27.jpg
Triple H: 'Hm.... I'm under attack and actually selling some midcarder's move...'

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/28.jpg
Triple H: 'Wait a moment, one of my matches just ended, and my OPPONENT is celebrating???'

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg
Triple H: 'OH SHIT! THAT'S WHY! I FORGOT TO DRINK MY EVOLUTION KOOL-AID THIS MORNING!!!'

[Savio]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/05.jpg
Hunter! stay in the back there's a hurricane coming through.

[Fryza]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/01.jpg

Worst. Exorcist. Remake. Ever.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/02.jpg

Check it out, Cousin It got a hair cut!

or

Worst. Meng impression. Ever.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/03.jpg

When rummaging through the Box of Lost Souls, Nidia was expecting a Sean O'Haire soul, but instead pulled the soul of the collective hair lost by Canadians through the recent years.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/04.jpg

Wait..Steph's on RAW now?! Dammit.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/05.jpg

Hurricane: Hurrisenses..tingling!...someone isn't staying in the back like my music is telling them to d...*gets clobbered by Triple H*

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/06.jpg

Hunter: See these wires? See that jeep? Guess what bitch?!
Shelton: ...I thought you were Triple H...not Triple K...

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/07.jpg

Using the Orton Telepathetic Mind Reader™, we can now see what's going through Rhyno's mind this moment! Let's tune in:

Rhyno: Okay...Goldberg's gone...right? Right. Which means they need another guy who can do a spear. And I have the gore. Which is soooo much more cool looking. Right, right? Yeah..yeah that's right. This means I may get a push to the mid-cards! I could get a win! YESSSS! Thank you Goldberg for leaving, now I'M the ONLY one with a spear-like move! Yes, oh happy da...wait...Edge's back...Shit, no DAMMIT SON OF A BITCH!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/08.jpg

Someone's been watching DragonBall Z.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/09.jpg

Johnny Oxide...Citrus...whatever, couldn't help but get a squeeze out of Steven Richards.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/10.jpg

Earl (In audience): Shawn, SHAWN!! Flair isn't Canadian, don't do his move!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/11.jpg

Flair hated the WWE's annual prostate check-ups.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/12.jpg

The first and last time you'll see Shawn handing a Canadian a title belt. Be grateful.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/13.jpg

Johnny: Oh shit..I left the stove on...

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/14.jpg

Johnny: No, HE'S a homo!
Dave: YEAH! I'M A HOM...wait...

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/15.jpg

Benoit: Did you, or did you NOT steal Molly's wig?
Johnny: ...
Shawn: ANSWER HIM!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/16.jpg

Chris: I feel like a ref...
Shawn: Oh yeah, I know...just keep it going...

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/17.jpg

The WWE segregation continued, by keeping the Blacks and Women Beaters in their own locker-room.

OR

Austin: Heh, I like your hair-cut.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/18.jpg

Trish: And then...they booked ME in a title shot!
Jericho: I'm sorry it had to come to this..
Trish: What?!
Jericho: Stunner, but that's not important right now. Remember that trick I showed you that Hunter showed me?
Trish: Yeah, why?
Jericho: Well..*moves hand around* Voila, bitch!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/19.jpg

Trish didn't take to kindly to the de-push.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/20.jpg

Christian: I didn't know you were ambidextrous....

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/21.jpg

They weren't kidding when they said smoking causes bad breath..

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/22.jpg

Once Kane found out his make-up was bleeding, all bloody (green) hell broke lose.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/23.jpg

Kane was shocked as anyone; how the hell did Triple H lose that much weight that fast?!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/24.jpg

Kane: HULK MAD!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/25.jpg

Rare video photo of Hunter's descriptive pantomine he gave to Steph.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg

Shelton: That's it? Are you kidding me?! You're that big?! Hahaha, I was bigger than that before I left the whom!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/27.jpg

I knew it! I was right! Hunter's racist! White cross on a black background! Booya, I called it!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/28.jpg

Chris and Shelton: PANAMA!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg

Hunter: ..........UH-OH!

[Corkscrewed]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg
"Holy shit! Our anniversary was yesterday!!!"

[Corkscrewed]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/24.jpg
It was bad enough he'd been beaten by a cowboy, but being pooped on by his horse was the last straw.

[Innovator]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/24.jpg

Since Kane was a failed gimmick, Glenn Jacobs was happy to become The Missing Link 2004

[Corkscrewed]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/17.jpg
"Heheheheh... Come with me, Shelton. There's this tree I want you to meet..."

[Mr.Violent J]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/01.jpg
Although Tajiri was pretty convincing, he was denied the oppurtunity to play the little girl in the re-make of The Exorcist.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/02.jpg
Nidia: I know biting is an illegal move, but swallowing an arm is acceptable??!!!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/03.jpg
Nidia falls victim to the classic April fools joke, someone put Nair in her shampoo :shifty:

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/04.jpg
After years of hiding it Molly finally revealed she was, in fact, Sinaed O'Connor.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/06.jpg
HHH: Oh quit crying, that Prostate Exam wasn't THAT bad....

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/07.jpg
In a stunning move the WWE decided it was time for Rhyno to change his gimmick. After talking with Austin, they agreed maybe they could recapture some fans with a Wyno gimmick.
(Yes I know it's spelled Wineo but it's all I could think of)

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/08.jpg
The crowd was stunned as HBK finally proved that he was god!! Commanding everyone to walk towards the light.

Meh that one is lame.
http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/09.jpg
Johnny: Yeah that's me, the Tough Enough champion from the second season.
HBK & Benoit: What's Tough Enough?

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/12.jpg
HBK: You put your right foot, you put your right foot out.....
Benoit: Damnit Shawn!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/13.jpg
The WWE was asking their superstars to go a little too far with the whole gay pride angles....

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/15.jpg
Benoit: WHAT??!! Triple H gave you a prostal exam too??!!
HBK: It's really not that bad. :shifty:

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/16.jpg
If Benoit was ever going to go over HHH again, he would for sure have to learn the YMCA dance

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/17.jpg
Shelton: Why yes, that is Brute.
Austin: You Shouldn't have.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/25.jpg
HHH: You are exactly this far from the glass ceiling.


This is my first attempt at captions, sorry if they suck :(

[loopydate]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/01.jpg

COACH: ...and then Mae came.
TAJIRI: Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarf!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/02.jpg

Wow! Nidia's getting REALLY good at her Stephanie impression. First the chest, now the sprea--oh, sorry.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/03.jpg

NIDIA: Okay! I cleaned out A-Train's shower drain. What do you need me to do now?

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/04.jpg

That's not Molly. THAT'S A MAN, BABY!

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HHH: Oh, shit! There's an "H" on the 'Tron! I missed my cue!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/06.jpg

HHH: And THAT's for saying the athletic tape roll was too wide!
SHELTON: Okay. *Gasp* It fit perfectly...

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/07.jpg

RHYNO: Love you, too, Stevie. No one must ever know...

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AVALAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANCHE!

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LILIAN: Does anyone know where my panties are?

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/10.jpg

Where will YOU be when a senior citizen kicks your ass so hard it pops through your crotch?

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/11.jpg

SHAWN: Hey, did you hear that Rhyno's on RAW now?
RIC: Yeah, why do you a--oh.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/12.jpg

HBK: Ha ha! Now I'M the champion!
GOD: Give it back!
HBK: Yessir.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/13.jpg

JOHNNY: I forgot to tape "The Inferno" tonight.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/14.jpg

LILIAN: What did you guys think of "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind?"
BOTH: Thumbs up!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/15.jpg

And here we see a full-grown zebra taken down mid-stride by the vicious wolverine.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/16.jpg

HBK: Rhyno?
CHRIS: Yeah...

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/17.jpg

STEVE: You wouldn't happen to know where the Divas' locker room is, would you?
SHELTON: Down the hall to the left. Why?
STEVE: No reason. *Cracks knuckles* I'll be back in a minute.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/18.jpg

Good to see Trish earned her Oxstar Seal of Approval.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/19.jpg

Tonight's edition of RAW is brought to you by Herbal Essences. Yes. Yes! YES!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/20.jpg

TRISH: I wuv you, Papa Smurf...
CHRISTIAN: Um...yeah.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/21.jpg

KANE: ...and he kept yelling "Who's your coach?! Who's your coach?!"
TAJIRI: Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarf!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/22.jpg

KANE: Note to self, Chia is NOT edible.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/23.jpg

KANE: Jellooooo Pudding!
EDGE: :lol: That's great!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/24.jpg

Is it in you?

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/25.jpg

HHH (falsetto): Hi. Ah'm Mister Fingy!
REF: Oh, God. All the jobbing is finally getting to him.
HHH (falsetto): Wanna be mah friend?

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg

SHELTON: Watch out for...The Claw!
HHH: AHHHHHHHHHH! Helphelphelphelphelp!
REF: Knock it off, Shel.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/27.jpg

SHELTON: Hey, Hunter, I forgot to mention that your Kool-Aid delivery accidentally wound up at my locker room. I had a little. Hope you don't mind.
HHH: Ohhhhhh...

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/28.jpg

That bastard Sauron always picked the most inopportune time to do a run-in.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg

HHH: My parents are in Florida...and I'm in New York!

[Corkscrewed]

LMAO! Great stuff, Loopy, and you made the deadline with plenty to spare!

[Corkscrewed]

Oh yeah, that also means get your captions in by tomorrow night or you won't be considered for CotM. :D

[BigDaddyCool]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/01.jpg
Tajiri, well schooled as a heel, sucked Coachmen's life force from his body.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/21.jpg
Later, Tajiri drains Kane of his life force aswell.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/25.jpg
It is clear, that HHH's favore Kids in the Hall scetch is the "I'm crushing your head!" scetch.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg
Shelton agrees

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/03.jpg
I don't care if Cousin It (Addam's Family) is the father, that is no way to hold a baby.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg
Even HHH was mortified with how Nidia held Cousin It's baby, and this guy did the necrophilia bit.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/13.jpg
HBK (thinking): haha, now I just need to plant Beniot's wallet in Eddie's duffle bag!

[Shaggy]

First Captions (Hope some of them turn out good)

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/01.jpg
Tajiri's reaction after Coach told him Triple H was gonna lose tonight.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/02.jpg
Molly: You sure shave your armpits good.
Ref: Thats not the only thing.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/03.jpg
After noticing what happened, Nidia had to try to think up a way to convince the ref she didnt pull Molly's hair.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/04.jpg
Molly was so pissed after the match that she pulled her own hair out.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/05.jpg
HHH heroically pushed the hurricane out of the way before the Hurricane symbol could attack him from behind.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/06.jpg
HHH: Say it like you got a pair!
Benjamin: One....Two....Three....


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/07.jpg
Rhyno looks at Storm and for a breif second thinks that he is still in ECW.


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/08.jpg
By Gods Light...I HAVE THE POWER!!!!!!!!!!!!!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/09.jpg
Lillian: Johnny Nitro??? Eric Must be Proud
Nitro: Well you know.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/10.jpg
Congratulations HBK....Its a Flair.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/11.jpg
HBK: Get down child..Thats to dangerous.


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/12.jpg
HBK: Bang Bang...Your Dead


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/13.jpg
HBK: I love you man!!!
Beniot: Too Bad its my title.


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/14.jpg
Batista: Eric loves me more!!!
Nitro: No...Eric Loves me more!!!
Lillian: Fags


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/15.jpg
After attacking the Ref, HBK and Benot reallize that it wasnt Nitro yea Molly in a ref constume.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/16.jpg
Beniot: Ladies and Gentlemen, the person who will lose at Backlash...HBK
HBK: YEAAAA....wait..what?


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/17.jpg
Benjamin looks at Austin and wonders who really stole the others hair cut here.


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/18.jpg
Trish: Oh my god....its a boogey?


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Late Breaking News: Trish Stratus tragically died monday night after slipping over the Highlight Reel Logo that was conveniently placed on the walkway. Jericho says he didnt do it but is still being held for questioning.


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/20.jpg
Trish: Why does it have to be so small.
Christian: Oh my god!!! A girl touched me there.


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/21.jpg
Tajiri's reaction to when Kane told him he would win.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/22.jpg
Kane:(Looking at mirror in his hand) Hulk has nothing on me.


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/23.jpg
Resident Evil: The Wrestling Game


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/24.jpg
Urge to kill rising...rising...rising...

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/25.jpg
Before Viagra


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg
Benjamin: After Viagra
HHH: Oh you son of a.....

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/27.jpg
HHH: Its a message.
Benjamin: What does it say.
Ref: Let Benjamin go over and the Title is yours at backlash signed Vince


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/28.jpg
JR: Congrats go out to Benjamin on his win tonig....whats this...we have just gotten news that next weeks main event will be all the members of Evoltution vs Banjamin.


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg
HHH: Oh my God!!! Its happening again. IM LOSING!!!!!!!


I hope these were ok. There were my first time of actually doing all of them.

[Shaggy]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg
"Holy shit! Our anniversary was yesterday!!!"

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[MVP]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/01.jpg

Coach wasn't pleased with RAW's new water fountain.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/02.jpg

Molly: "Alright Nidia what would you like?"
Nidia: "I want a skull."
Molly: "Well I can draw Kermit the Frog. Would you like a Kermit the Frog?"
Nidia: "No I want a skull."
Molly: "Well I'm going to go ahead and draw Kermit and Frog."

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/03.jpg

Nidia was pretty nervous to wrestle Cousin It.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/04.jpg

Even Molly couldn't tame the beast in Cousin It.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/06.jpg

Triple H: "Oh man, what happened?"
Shelton: "Someone hit the joint before we got there."
Triple H: "Who did this to you man, WHO?!!"
Shelton: "It was a man...with a big green mask."
Triple H: "He's dead meat."

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/05.jpg

After the backstage assault:

Hurricane: "This will be remembered as the day that you ALMOST captured The Hurri...OH SHIT!"

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/07.jpg

Rhyno started thinking about what he would have to do with the upper management to get a real push, and the look on his face showed his enthusiasm.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/08.jpg

The debut of Jubilee on RAW was a huge success.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/09.jpg

Johnny: "C'mon Lillian, can't we just go out once like old times?"
Lillian: "Don't start with me Florence!"
Benoit: "FLORENCE?! Hahahahahahahahaha"
HBK: "Oh man Johnny Nitro's real name is Florence?! Hahahahahaha"
Johnny: "Hey shut up...you all shut up!!"

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/10.jpg

The fans thought it was sweet of Shawn Michaels to help an old man cross the ring.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/11.jpg

Ric: Shawn look, a chick with huge knockers in the third row is flashing us!"
HBK: "Oh yeah that's nice...hey Johnny why are you looking at me? Look at her!"

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/12.jpg

HBK: "I can't believe we won Chris!"
Benoit: "Yeah neither can I, now can you take your hand off my belt."
HBK: " I...I can't, my hand seems to be stuck."
Benoit: "Oh great, someone put super glue on the Tag Team titles."
Ric: "Hehehe!"

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/13.jpg

Shawn and Chris got used to being stuck together pretty quickly.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/14.jpg

Batista: "ME MONSTER IN BED!"
Johnny: "Oh he's the man in the bedroom, take it from me."

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/15.jpg

Benoit: "Everybody I told about the file is dead."

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/16.jpg

The beer bottle was looking to get a main event push against HBK and Benoit.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/17.jpg

Austin: "...and then I pushed her down the stairs."

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/18.jpg

Chris's face showed his happiness when Trish told him she has a penis.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/19.jpg

Trish was so pissed off at Chris that she walked out on him for the Highlight Reel icon.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/20.jpg

Christian: "Don't worry Trish, Chris won't hurt you ever again, just don't play Candyland with him."

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/21.jpg

The faulty water fountain strikes again.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/22.jpg

Kane: "OH...MY...GOD like my mascara is running."

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/24.jpg

Mr. Clean wasn't prepared for his shoot.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/25.jpg

Triple H: "My cock size is this many...WTFFFFFFFFFFF decimal misplacement chief!"

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg

Shelton: "This is how tight my wife's vagina is. What about your's Hunter?"

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/28.jpg

Once word ot out about Shelton's win over Triple H, Vince gave the command for the flamethrower.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg

Triple H just found out he's scheduled for another long-term feud with Scott Steiner.

[Fryza]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/05.jpg

HHH: Oh, shit! There's an "H" on the 'Tron! I missed my cue!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/17.jpg

STEVE: You wouldn't happen to know where the Divas' locker room is, would you?
SHELTON: Down the hall to the left. Why?
STEVE: No reason. *Cracks knuckles* I'll be back in a minute.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/18.jpg

Good to see Trish earned her Oxstar Seal of Approval.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/20.jpg

TRISH: I wuv you, Papa Smurf...
CHRISTIAN: Um...yeah.

LOL :love:

[PorkSoda]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/03.jpg

There have been many superhero's in the past that are female, such as "Spider Lady", "Cat Woman" "Edward Scissorhands" and the all new "Nidia Hairforhands"

OR

Nidia didn't realize how much trouble she got into, first she stole JR's hat, made it dissapear into thin air, and now she messes up in the "Making the rabbit dissapear" in the hat trick, accidently turning the rabbit and the hat into female version of "HEAD"

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/04.jpg

Sporty Spice is really looking good these days, I smell a Spice Girls reunion!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/06.jpg

Triple H: I told you Ken, this is not Barbie World, now go back to the board game. This is RAW, you can't brush Barbie's hair, brush her teeth, do her nails or paint her feet anymore, your days of being plastic are over!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/09.jpg

After being Johnny Blaze, Johnny Spade, Johnny Nitro, Billy Club and Billy Goat, poor old Johnny couldent find a name, and decided to rename himself 10 Second Tom!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/10.jpg

Shawn Micheals: OK Flair, lets see you get out of THIS!
Ric Flair: Oh no, YOU STOLE MY MOVE!
Shawn Micheals: HEY LOOK! A DUCK MOUTHED PLATAPUSS!
Ric Flair: ...what?
Shawn Micheals: ITS COMIN RIGHT FOR US!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/22.jpg

WWE took the "Green Lantern" gimmick a bit too far.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/25.jpg

Triple H: Hey Shelton, have you ever played Pac-Man? He's the little Yellow guy who runs around in a maze and eats dots! This is my impression of him *Hand motion* Wah-Womp Wah-Womp Wah-Womp! Wah-Womp! Rumor has it that the ghosts have been running around in the back!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/20.jpg

He was right! Binky the Blue Ghost as Trish! OH NOOOOO!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/22.jpg

OH NO THE GREEN GHOST!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg

Shelton: I see you!!

[Rock Bottom]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/01.jpg
Tajiri: (8)...Rook over your shourder, ready to run, rike a good rittle bitch from a smoking gun! I am da game, and I make da rures...(8)

OR

Tajiri: Rut did da two rips say to da face?
Coach: ?
Tajiri: (SPIT) SRAP, I'm Rick James beetch.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/02.jpg
Molly: So, who did you sleep with last night?
Nidia: I don't kiss and tell!
Molly: Well, do you fuc</>k and tell?
Nidia: I'm not telling you!
Molly: Come on, it's okay... We all know you slept with Tajiri last night. I see that green all over your chest...
http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/01.jpg
Nidia: (Crying) It's true, it was so embarassing! When I told him to unload on my breasts, this isn't what I had in mind!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/03.jpg
Nidia: So Molly... Do the curtains match the drapes?
Molly: Nope. (tosses her a bush)
Nidia: :eek:

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/04.jpg
Hey Molly, A-Train called, and he wants his birthmark back.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/05.jpg
Hurricane: I was flyin' around, last night! And I saw, the most, evil villain... So, I flew, into action. And then... He... It was... Terrible.
http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/01.jpg
Hurricane: He just opened his mouth, and gobbled me up, like I was the Hamburglar.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/05.jpg
Hurricane: Hah, I can fly! Triple H's double-jobbing has broken his gravitational pull!
HHH: (running through the arena) POWERS... DON'T... WORK... MUST... MANUALLY... HOLD... EVERYONE... DOWN...

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/06.jpg
Triple H reveals that all along, he has been absorbing everyone's talent by touch like Rogue from X-Men!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/07.jpg
Well, maybe not everyone. Even Trips knew when to leave it alone.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/08.jpg
(8)Oh..! Oh! Ohhhhhhhhhh! I think I'm cute, I know I'm sexy... I got the looks...(8) Introducing first, from San Antonio Texas, weighing in at two hundred, thirty pounds, The Heart Break Kid, Shawwwwwwwwwwwwwn, Michaellllllllllllllllllls!

(8)Jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesus Chriiiiiiiiiiiiiiist, Suuuuuuuuper Starrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...(8)
And his tag-team partner, from The Pearly Gates, weighing in at nine trillion, eight hundred, fourty-nine billion, seven hundred, ninety-six million, five hundred, thirty-nine thousand, and one pound, The Allllllllllllllllllmightyyyyyyyyy, Godddddddddddddddddd!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/09.jpg
Lillian: And the laaaaaaaaaaaaand, of theeeeeeeeeeee, freeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
(All at the same time)
Benoit: Thank you Lillian... That was inspiring, I mean ever since I was a little boy in Atlanta Georgia...
Michaels: Benoit, put your hand down, you're a Canadian...
Spade: Will you sing the Elmo song for me?

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/10.jpg
When Michaels told Ric Flair that his penis was a foot long, Flair didn't believe him. So Michaels grabbed a foot and measured.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/11.jpg
JR: Well now Flair is going upstairs! King, this has never worked!
King: Wait a minute... It's working JR!
JR: BAH GAWD, HE IS LITERALLY PERFORMING FELLATIO ON THE NATURE BOY! BBQ SAUCE UNPRETTIER PETER NORTH STUNNER!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/12.jpg
Michaels: Oh suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuure, they just give the bellllllllllt to youuuuuuuuuuu Benoit. Here, take the tag-team strap too. Why don't you just wear all the damn belts?

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/13.jpg
Benoit: Well Shawn, why don't you keep one, since you were the one that pinned Flair?
Michaels: !? HUH!?
Benoit: ...? Dude? You won the match... Heh... You're the one that got us these titles.
Michaels: Wow, you're the greatest Benoit! Trips never let me have a belt even when I did pin him clean!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/14.jpg
Looking to his mentor Triple H for advice, Batista, as well as Spade, were both equally shocked that he had gotten a sex change.
Batista: Hunter, why!? WHY!?
Hunter: (Shrug) Some of the divas are getting bigger boobs than me, so it's time to hold them down.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/15.jpg
Michaels: I gotta hand it to you Benoit, knocking out the ref when I hooked you in that Sharpshooter was pretty smart, I've gotta get some new material.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/16.jpg
And now, we take another look into the minds of Benoit and Michaels, with our extra sensory perceptive machine.
Benoit: (Wow... The WWE champ... Getting a big rub by Michaels. These are the happiest days of my life.)
Michaels: (Days? You got that right... 16 days to be exact.)
Benoit: (...)

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/17.jpg
Shelton: So the internet buzz from the TPWW poster eminem is that I am the next Rock. What do you think Steve? Do you smell what the Benjamin is cookin'?
Steve: :lol:

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/18.jpg
Jericho was pissed when the dentist gave Trish a sticker for clean teeth and not him, which prompted Jericho to hide his problem.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/19.jpg
Trish was pissed when Jericho revealed her and my own little secret. She was a Bottom-feeder. That's right, a Rock Bottom feeder. That pooty is mine.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/20.jpg
Whenever skanks like Trish got upset, Christian always knew how to calm them down and get them to sleep with a lull.
Christian: (8)Rockin' you baaaaaaaaaby, in the hot tub... When I get blown, my strudle will throb...(8)

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/21.jpg
The ref found Tajiri and Kane's strange romance to be disgusting at the very least.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/22.jpg
Kane: LET'S ROCK.
JR: BAH GAWD, KANE HAS TURNED INTO THE INCREDIBLE HULK!
King: Wow! With Rey turning into the Flash, and Kane turning into the Hulk, the next thing you know JR, you'll turn into the Blob!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/23.jpg
JR: Well Kane may be the Hulk, but he is no match for Hold-Down Man!
King: Er, that's Edge, not Trips...
JR: Look closely King. That's Triple H's face on Edge's body.
King: Wow, you're right JR. What the hell?
JR: Well, I imagine that's why he pushed to feud with Edge so bad. Apparently he plans to shapeshift into Edge and job to himself.
King: What a genius!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/24.jpg
Kane: Why am I green? Alright, alright, I'll tell you why I'm green. I was walking along, minding my own business, when this little Japenese guy comes up to me. He looks at my package and bows. I'm like WTF? So then he takes me to a meeting room, with all his buddies. Well, it turns out they wanted to offer me a million dollars for my penis pills. I refused.
http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/01.jpg
The next thing I know, his friend says something in Japenese... I think it was, "He is a firm negotiator." So he just spit this sh</>it all over my face!

------------
(Alright, for the next one, I am gonna avoid the small penis jokes because I know everyone is gonna do em...)
------------

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/25.jpg
Triple H just couldn't help giving Steven Richards a nipple-twist for good luck.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg
Shelton: Ohhhhhhhh! So Steven Richards is right here? And it gives you good luck? Sweet!
Richards: OW, get your finger out of my ass!
Triple H: You dumbass. :lol:

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/27.jpg
The ref, aroused by the sight of two men in their underwear wrestling each other, couldn't resist the urge to hit his hands and knees and bark like a dog.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/28.jpg
Benjamin: I won! It's all about the Benjamins!
Chris Benoit: Shelton?
Benjamin: Yeah?
Chris Benoit: If you wanna get anywhere in this company, you have to stop hanging around Goldust. Trust me.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg
Evolution: And to show our appreciation for everything you've done... Triple H, this, is your life!
(Video plays)
Triple H: Who's your daddy... Who's your daddy...
Steph: Vince McMahon is... Are you in yet?
Triple H: I think I'm gonna... Ohmygod... BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HH.
Orton: *$&^%&^$&^&#^$ WRONG VIDEO FLAIR, YOU MORON!

[The Iron Yuppie]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/22.jpg

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/24.jpg

Stills from the final scene from the upcoming Manhole Productions release "The Hulk Goes To Fire Island". Next up from Manhole Productions will be "Shower Room Initiations" starring Bradshaw and Spanky.

[Rock Bottom]

ROFL @ everyone's Steve Austin woman-beating captions. That's soooooooo wrong. I intentionally didn't do those too, now I wish I did. :lol:

[CBright7831]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/22.jpg
Kane: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/23.jpg
*Edge runs to Kane's aid*
Edge: What happened?!?!?!?

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/24.jpg
Kane: He slimed me...

[Rock Bottom]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/17.jpg
Austin: And then I was like, "No, sorry sir, no problem here."
Shelton: And what did Molly do then?
Austin: Well, as soon she put her wig back on and I figured it out, I knew it was time to move in for the kill.



There, I did one. :shifty:

EDIT: I fuc</>ked up my own punchline. Edited to make sense now.

[Blue Demon]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/22.jpg

Kane after he didn't know on You Can't Do That On Television

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg

OMG!! I just had a nightmare that I was being buried.


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/20.jpg

Christian was shocked when Trish burst out of his stomach

[JT]

Like Austin Powers said, "This isn't my bag baby", but I'm going to give it a go. Maybe I hit it lucky and get on that "Best Captions of the Year" thread.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/01.jpg
Tajiri unleashed his new move on the Coach. The "Gingivitis Ki Blast".

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/09.jpg
Nitro: How you do'in? :naughty:

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/12.jpg
Shawn: I don't beleive it. We finally won the titles Marty!

Benoit: You're not even trying anymore.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/13.jpg
Shawn: Just joking there Jericho.

Benoit: Again...wrong Chris!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/15.jpg
Shawn: Nowinski?

Benoit: Keep trying.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/16.jpg
Shawn: Chetti?

Benoit: He doesn't even work for this company.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/17.jpg
Shelton: Well the offer's nice Austin, but I've heard what you do to your girlfriends.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/19.jpg
Trish: Shit, damn, ass, fu</>ck, bastard, bitch, badd ass heel, fu</>ck, shit, damn!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/20.jpg
And here we see a hugh between the CLB...and Christian.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/21.jpg
Tajiri attempts the Gingivitis Ki Blast against Kane...

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/22.jpg
...but it shows very little effect.

Kane: Fool! Your Gingivitis Ki Blast is no match for my dentistry powers. Now you shall pay.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/23.jpg
Someone: Quick...get into positions. Triple H is coming.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/25.jpg
Triple H: This is how long your push is going to last.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg
Shelton: Oh yea, well Vince said my push was going to last this long... :?: ...DAMN IT!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/27.jpg
*Shelton reaches behind HHH head.*

Shelton: Hey...what's this.

HHH: No, no, no...<o>not the amulet!!!</i>

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/28.jpg
Shelton: I actually won! Wow, this amulet must have been the source of HHH's powers!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg
Within seconds after losing his amulet, HHH get's a divorce from his wife, his back turned on by anyone with WWE power, de-pushed, and jobbed off to Lance Storm...and all before the copywrites pop up.

[faust34]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/01.jpg

The always deadly and gross Osaka flu hits the RAW locker room with disgusting results.

or

Tajiri just didn't have the stomach to make it through that best of Mae Young video: Mae gone wild uncensored edition

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/02.jpg

::Nidia Thinking:: Wow, This is what I worked so hard for these last few years. My mom, my dad, my Fiancée, there all watching me, I'm so happy I could make them proud, Its like a dream come true.

::Ref Thinking:: Look at them titties, my goodness!


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/03.jpg

The female wrestling species, Nidia Wrestleus, goes through a molting process every so often. here we can see that she has shed her old skanky curly hair for some new straight hoe style hair.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/04.jpg

Steph: "I dunno I've tried everything, I've even tried scrubbing them out"

or

Jerri from survivor makes her wrestling debut as the bitch who hates everyone and complains about everything.


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/05.jpg

The Hurricane may have super powers be even he was unable to dodge the giant throwing star that evil ninja, storm shadow threw at him


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/07.jpg

::Rhyno:: Ok man, be cool, don't mess this gore up, last time that happened Vince got pissed and put me in a feud with hardcore holly ::shudder:: ok, concentrate man, ready set, go!


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/08.jpg

When HBK said he had god on his side he wasn't kidding, as our father and lord appeared before the arena and smote the devil HHH, casting him to back to the dark depths from where he came.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/09.jpg

Johnny B.-"I forgot my gimmick name again this week, just make something up, not like anyone cares, I am a tough enough winner after all."


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/10.jpg

The Figure four leg lock had gone terribly wrong, when HBK, powered by god, stood straight up breaking both of Ric's legs in 4 spots.


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/11.jpg

Ric: Shawn I'm getting caught down there, can you adjust me."
Shawn: "It would be my pleasure."
Ric: "ahh it's good to be a legend."

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/13.jpg

HBK and CB celebrate their win over the Devil's spawn, while god cheers them on from seat 2a.Row B section 12.



http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/14.jpg

Batista: "Hunter you gotta help, These guys are just to talented and over compared to me."

Hunter ::Satanic Voice:: "You've got no mic skills, or in ring skills, plus I'm focusing all my evil powers on little hunter, er I mean Randy, So sorry, even I can't work miracles Dave."

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/17.jpg

You see the trick is to live in Texas, you'll get executed for Jaywalking there, but a scumbag like me, hell the cops just ask for my autograph and let me go :n:


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/18.jpg

Trish was gloating about how she got the last package of Crest white strips.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/19.jpg

Trish was furious when the little blue man in the hamster ball refused to stop following her to the ring.


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/20.jpg

Christian was horrified when he found out the woman he had been comforting for the last few minutes wasn't Trish, but was in fact Madeline Albright.


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/22.jpg

Kane's Ecto cooler addiction was beginning to affect his in ring performance.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/23.jpg

Jerry Lynn made his velocity re-debut when he pinned Kane in 10 seconds, thus killing his character forever.


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/24.jpg

Kane: "I didn't know that when you say the line, I don't know, on this show they pour slime on you.

Reps to any old schooler that gets this one


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/25.jpg

I'm crushing your head!


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg

This is how big your penis is compared to mine, You know what they say about black men Hunter.


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg[/QUOTE]

OMG it's happening again, it's just like WM XII all over again! NOOOOOOOOOOOO ::hunter explodes::

[AareDub]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/15.jpg
HBK and Benoit stopped mid match to discover that this particular ref was, in fact, a decoy.

[Iceman90]

Lets see what I can muster up this week.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/05.jpg
Dancing Lance may be no more, so Triple H made The Hurricane take over the gimmick.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/07.jpg
Since Trish was wearing a big shirt, the camera gets the next best cleavage shot...Rhyno

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/25.jpg
My penis is this much longer than Jazz's penis.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg
Really? I heard Jazz's penis was this much bigger than yours!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg
Triple H's reaction after finding out his stock in WWE just hit rock bottom.

[CBright7831]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/24.jpg
Kane: "I didn't know that you say the line, I don't know, on this show they pour slime on you.

Reps to any old schooler that gets this one

You Can't Do That On Television

[faust34]

You Can't Do That On Television

Bingo

[Corkscrewed]

Wow, everyone was on fire today! Of course, with pics like those, it's not a huge surprise. Definitely a nice bit of comedy though. :y: :y: to everyone!

[Champion of Europa]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/09.jpg

Lillian: This match is scheduled for one fall..
Johnny Nitro: DURR THIS MATCH IS SCHEDULED FOR ONE FALL!
Lillian: Stop mocking me!
Johnny Nitro: LOOK AT ME, I'M LILLIAN GARCIA RRRURURURUR

[AareDub]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/14.jpg
Lilian: ... and your special guest ref is Johnny Spa..
Johnny: actually there's been a change. I'll be Johnny Nitro from now on
Lilian: your special ref... Johnny Nitro
Batista: Hey I thought your name was Spade!
Johnny: I changed it
Batista: Well I wanna change my name too! Can I be announced as the Next Big Thing? I hear that's available now.
Lilian: Fine, whatever. "Introducing the referee for the match Johnny Nitro. First up is team of Ric Flair and The Next Big Thing Batista. Their opponents for tonight are HBK Shawn Michaels and the WWE Champ Chris Benoit, from Calgary Alb....
Benoit (off screen): Actually Lilian, it's Atlanta now....
Lilian: F'k it, I quit.

That is by far the longest caption I've ever written.

[Corkscrewed]

Ooh! I just came up with a good one (I hope)!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg
Things had been going bad recently, but when he saw Ultimate Warrior walking down the ramp toward the ring, Triple H REALLY freaked out.

[BigDaddyCool]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg
HHH (thinking): Hmmm, my hands are stuck to my head. Well that is too bad. But why....What happened. Lets see, did I touch something sticky? No, that isn't it. Am I sick, and some how my sweat has turned into a type of glue...no that doesn't make since. Hmmm, what could it be. Lets see, I talked to Rhyno earlier about how to make jobbers look extra weak by beating them in a minute. Hey, Rhyno's on Raw now isn't he? Why do I keep thinking Rhyno. Oh s</>hit, I forgot, he has that super glue. Bastard, should have seen this comimg

[El Santo]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/01.jpg
Tajiri never got used to the bold taste of Mountain Dew.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/02.jpg
Ref: "Hey! My mom had a pair of those!"

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/03.jpg
Nidia freaked when she found 3-year-old leftovers in her fridge.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/04.jpg
And as if he couldn't sink any lower, Kane debuts his new gimmick, "Glenda Jacobs".

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/05.jpg
After his thirty day low carb diet, Rosey has never looked better!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/06.jpg
Shelton had lost the tag titles, lost his partner, and was now on a different show all together, but having to listen to HHH prattle on about his love life was more than he could stand.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/07.jpg
Very few people knew that Rhyno was an excellent hockey player. Even fewer people knew that one could play hockey in a wrestling ring.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/08.jpg
After the announcement that Backlash will feature YET ANOTHER thriple threat match between Benoit and Michaels and Hunter, the universe spontaneously combusts.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/09.jpg
Benoit and Michaels watch in disbelief as Lillian disembowels Johnny Nitro. Fortunately for Johnny, he's too stoned to notice.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/10.jpg
The matched was stopped for a couple of minutes as Michaels drags away an old man who somehow snuck into the ring.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/11.jpg
Given Flair's age, he understandably needed some help when playing leapfrog.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/12.jpg
Benoit was thrilled to win both the World Heavyweight and Tag Titles, but... Jesus Christ, when did Michaels grow breasts!?!?!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/13.jpg
Sitting in the fifth row, God couldn't be more thrilled for his boy, HBK.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/14.jpg
Johnny: "What's that, Cousin It?"
Batista: "Little Jimmy is stuck down a well?"

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/15.jpg
Even Benoit's discovery that the Ref was really Weird Al Yankovich wouldn't stop HBK from finishing his spinaroonie.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/16.jpg
In a blasphemous heel turn, Michaels calls God a homo.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/17.jpg
Though he didn't get the rare rookie one with the Team Angle singlets, Austin couldn't be happier with his new life-sized Shelton Benjamin cutout.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/18.jpg
Trish: "So I regret nothing.... Aren't you supposed to be calling me a brutal trashbag ho about now?"
Chris: "I was chest ... I mean, I was just getting to tit... um, getting to it."

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/19.jpg
All chaos broke loose as a thirty-foot tall Trish Stratus terrorized the fans.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/20.jpg
Christian knew it was wrong to cheat on Trish with Molly Holly, but there was something about rubbing his fingers through her bald scalp that made his naughty parts tingle.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/21.jpg
Kane: "No really, Tajiri, try it. It's called Mountain Dew. It's the most refreshing drink ev-.... GYAAHHHH!!!!"

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/22.jpg
Hundreds of fans tossed their cookies when Kane sneezed on national TV.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/23.jpg
Oh my God! It's Goldberg... And he's discovered Rogaine!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/24.jpg
Quickly realizing that "Glenda Jacobs" was a dead-end gimmick, Kane debuts as "The Not So Jolly Grean Giant."

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/25.jpg
Desperate to beat Shelton in this match, Triple H resorts to using the Force.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg
Unfortunately, Shelton was no stranger to the old religion and he prepares to shoot lightning out his fingers.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/27.jpg
Trips knew he was losing this match, but damn, Shelton gave the best back massages in the WWE!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/28.jpg
Benoit knew this was low --- especially while Shelton was celebrating now less --- but if there was a golden opportunity to steal Shelton's wristband, it would be NOW.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg
Triple H: "Oh my God! I forgot to take out the trash! Steph is going to kill me!"

[Blue Demon]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/24.jpg

Kane: "I didn't know that when you say the line, I don't know, on this show they pour slime on you.

Reps to any old schooler that gets this one
::
It's from Fun House...and I alrewady made reference to it!! :mad:

[faust34]

It's from Fun House...and I alrewady made reference to it!! :mad:

Actually it's from you can't do that on television, not fun house. I'm not sure when fun house came out, but the show I am quoting was from the early 1980's, before you were born, and no I did not read, nor steal your captions.

[Blue Demon]

DAMMIT...you're right!! It was from you can't do that on Television. I thought it was from Fun House. :o My Bad.

[SuperSlim]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/01.jpg
Tajiri learned that Coach isn't human... how can blowin someone be green?

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/03.jpg
Nidia: And this is an example of a French bush.


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/08.jpg
Shawn Michaels displays his new finisher... the Atomic Fart.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/20.jpg
Christian: What do you mean you can't find it? I found it ealier.
Trish:I'm sorry, I'm tryin.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg
I'ma smoosh your little head.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg
Now I'ma smoosh yours.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg
Oh crap! My career is ruined! He smooshed my head!

[Gone Mad]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/01.jpg
Tajiri, after Coach shows him all the moves from "Chicago."

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/08.jpg
PLATOON REDUX!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/05.jpg
HHH jobbing 3 weeks in a row? Someone else has to do the jobbing.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/17.jpg
http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/06.jpg
HHH: Drinkin' with Austin?

Benjamin: ..y..yea.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/07.jpg
Rhyno: Um.. you mean a match where.. I am the winner...? Well, its been a while..

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/09.jpg
Lillian: I have just been informed that Johnny Nitro will be called Johnny Nite Heat.. wait, now I'm being told it's now Johnny Confidential.. oh! And now, it's Eugene!

Johnny: Oh, crap.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/26.jpg
Shelton: GOT YOUR NOSE!

HHH: I'm doomed.

[13]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/06.jpg

Desperately hoping the fans had forgotton about WM XVIIII, the WWE decides to recycle Trips 'hate crime' angle.

[faust34]

DAMMIT...you're right!! It was from you can't do that on Television. I thought it was from Fun House. :o My Bad.

Is ok, :y:

[Blue Demon]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/08.jpg

Shawn Michaels destroys the mid-card glass house.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/29.jpg

nooooooooooo!

[Corkscrewed]

LMAO at El Santo again! He really burned it up at the end. Hey! Pick a caption for you CotM nominee. It's really hard for me... :D

Props to gonMad00... who actually did a "got your nose" bit. I can't believe I didn't think of it yet. Or anyone else.

[Blue Demon]

LMAO at El Santo again! He really burned it up at the end. Hey! Pick a caption for you CotM nominee. It's really hard for me... :D

Props to gonMad00... who actually did a "got your nose" bit. I can't believe I didn't think of it yet. Or anyone else.
when/where can we do it?

[Corkscrewed]

Just PM me. Or reply to the Caption Archive thread with suggestions. :) (you mean suggest CotM nominees right?)

[Azriel]

Really great stuff this week. Can't wait to see what gets nominated for COTM

[Shaggy]

Man I wonder if any of mine will get nominated. Some sucked but I think I might of done some good for my first try.

[BigDaddyCool]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/22.jpg
Glenn Jacob's horrible secret was finally revialed when he got busted open. He wasn't human, no he was a Vulcan. (Vulcans have green blood for you non-Star Trek watching losers).

[BigDaddyCool]

It's from Fun House...and I alrewady made reference to it!! :mad:

No, its from "You Can't Say that on Television" and the line is "what".

Saying water got you soaked in water.

[ColdwaVer]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/01.jpg

Taijiri demonstrates Y2Stinger product placement.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/03.jpg

Nidia was apalled that Molly resorted to stealing the finish of WXX's Angle/Guerrero match.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/05.jpg

HHH: Damn, I'm late... HEY! EVOLUTION LEFT WITHOUT ME?!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/06.jpg

HHH: You did a good job making it look like you thought my jobbing was funny. You've got talent kid.
Benjamin: "Look like?"

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/07.jpg

"I wonder who cleans the cages on this show...

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/08.jpg

HBK displays his Divine Flatulence.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/09.jpg

Benoit: Yeah, and I'm Chris Thunder and that's Shawn Starrcade.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/10.jpg

HBK: It's a magic trick, see, I steal someone's finisher and the bell rings on its own, haha!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/11.jpg

Flair: Why do they always do this... I just wanna admire the view!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/12.jpg

HBK: Pull my belt!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/13.jpg

Insert "you're a homo" joke here.

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/14.jpg

Johnny: Look at this guys pants!!!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/15.jpg

"Let's see who you really are, Mister!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/16.jpg

Guy in front of sign: "This makes me want to punch myself."

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/17.jpg

Austin and Benjamin discuss plans to recruit Molly into their "baldy stable."

[Blue Demon]

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/15.jpg

Benoit: WHO DOES NUMBER 2 WORK FOR!!!

[Corkscrewed]

^ :lol: :lol:

[El Santo]

I have to give mad props to Sascha's captions, which are easy to overlook because they only come out one at a time, but they never fail to be gut busting hilarous. I'm still laughing over last week's "Gay congo line" one, by the way. :)

[twitas]

[QUOTE=Corkscrewed]http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/01.jpg
I am gonna blllooowwww you down!

http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/02.jpg
"I am telling you.. This is not the YMCA choregraphy at all!"


http://raw.wwe.com/results/032904/images/03.jpg
Oh lord... I found what's left of Essa Rios