The Red Dwarf Game
 

For my fellow Dwarfers, the quote game. A poster writes a quote from Red Dwarf, and the other posters have to guess:

i) which character(s) said it
ii) which episode

Whoever gets it right gives the next quote. Easy one to start....

"Oh my God, my name's Billy Doyle and my cologne is L'eau de Yak Urine".

Rimmer in "Back to Reality"

Do I wait until you say I'm right then post a quote or do I just go on ahead with it?

Well, I waited a while and I know I'm right so I'll just go on ahead.

"S-E-X, you know I want it! S-E-X, you know I need it!... S-E-X, I think I found it!"

Gotta be Cat.... probably series 1 or 2... I'm stumped for the episode though.

And you were right with the Rimmer line, by the way (as you know).

Will I tell you the episode title or do you want to guess?
You have the series and character right though.

Red Dwarf?

Is it Stasis Leak?

A very funny sci-fi comedy from the UK

Nope, it was Confidence and Paranoia.

Here is another one:

"Are you ok?"

"Well, sir, I have a medium sized axe buried in my spine. Thats enough to really put a crimp on your day."

Lister and Kryten, Series 5....

I'm thinking The Inquisitor?

No, no.... Demons and Angels.

Neither of those but you got the characters right. It was in the episode "Holovirus".

I'll do a third and easier one.

"I don't beileve anyone would go fishing where they know they're are no fish."

"I used to do it all the time back home. Go to the canal, they're where never any fish in there. We used to go condom fishing. I swear, one time I got a 2 pound black rib nobbler, it was about this size!"

The second guy's Lister. I'm assuming the first is Rimmer. I remember the line, but can't remember the ep. I'm guessing it's from one of the first two seasons.

There is no episode called Holovirus.

And my guess would be Rimmer and Lister, Dimension Jump.

5:58pm

6:22pm

:D:D

:lol: Didn't notice your reply there.

I was too eager to point out that there was no Holovirus episode to read beyond that post.

Oh, I meant "Quarantine", I'm not sure why I typed Holovirus. Maybe it's because thats what the episodes about.

Yeah Tornedo was right about the other quote.

Ah Quarantine! Mr. Flibble is very cross!

I got one. Character and episode please.

"You make love like a Japanese meal. Small portions... but so many courses."

Holoship and it's the female crew member that sleeps with Rimmer. A name escapes me right now since I'm in college.

Yeah, you're right. And it was Nirvana Crane.

Okay, then...

"I've lost me pea. Oh, that's it, I've cracked."

i HAVEN'T SEEN THAT SHOW IN YEARS. aT THE TIME IT WAS ONE OF MY FAVOURITES.

It was Lister and the episode was Queeg.

Spot on. Mine are obviously too easy for you.

"Do you mind? This is the Annual General Meeting of the Agoraphobics Society".

Lister in Stasis Leak.

Here's one for you.

"I've just been molested by Tutankhamuns horny grandma!!"

I'd be surprised if you got this because I'm not sure if its too difficult or not.

Edit: 2,500 posts ^_^

Epideme

Yeah but who said it?

Lister said it in Epideme, after being attacked by Caroline Carmen.

Correct. Your go. Gimme a hard one.

"Ayy, Mr. Time Drive"

Wtf Real Deal hasn't posted in here yet? :eek:

Who said (and I may have fucked up the quote but you'll get the point) "the worst book ever: Football - It's a Funny Old Game by Kevin Keegan"

It was Holly but I dunno which episode. I think it might be in Future Echoes.

Anyway, Neandercarl, I think your quote was by Cat but I'm not sure which episode. You haven't beaten me yet though, I'll get the episode name in my head soon.

The Keegan quote was definitely Holly in series 1 or 2. Cannot remember the episode. I'm thinking Confidence and Paranoia?

As for my quote... I can tell you that it wasn't Cat.

I think you're right.

As for the "Mr. Time Drive" quote, it was Lister in Tikka to Ride.

I got it,Finally!:D

Here's a new one,

"It's my duty to rescue him."

"You're duty?"

"My duty as total and utter bastard!"

That would be Rimmer in Timeslides. And you were right on the Tikka to Ride quote.

"What's your view, Hol?"
"Right up your nose when you look at me like that".

Not Stasis Leak

Lister and Holly in Back in the Red part 1

Yep.

"I know that this probably won't interest you, but I'd hate myself for the rest of my life if I didn't at least suggest it."

"Suggest what?"

"If you're interested, I'll be in my quarters at lunchtime, covered in torama salada."

Yeah, seconded. Outsider's right. But what was his name???

His name was Bongo. I think Outsiders the first person to get one right that wasn't me or NeanderCarl.

C'mon then Outsider. Your go!

Is it Rimmer talking about his own Father in Better than life?

Come on then, Impeccable, it's your turn.

Okay, here goes

That's why I was an orphan, even though my parents were alive. That's why I had my appendix out ... twice

Nope!

Although, remembering the theme of the episode, where Lister is dumped in a box as a baby, I can see where you'd get the idea.

Try again.

Rimmer in "Thanks for the Memory."

Correct!

What do I win?

My quote now,

"Do think I like being stuck on the giant skip with thrusters!? Do you think I even enjoy breathing in on this ship!?"

Christine Kochanski in the Episode "Blue".

Correct.

I love that episode. Especially the Arnold Rimmer experience at the end. Anywho.

"Seventeen years old and he used to snog his own hand. Once, in front of the whole school, he called his gym teacher "Daddy"."

YEah, have you seen the "smeg up" bits where Chris Barrie is trying to mouth to the words but keeps messing up?

Anyway, your quote is Paranoia in Confidence and Paranoia.

"I've tried fitting in, I really have. I even tried learning what 'off-side' was."

No one??

Spot on. Your turn.

I thought this thread died.

www.tv-links.co.uk has all these shows on there including Red Dwarf. Been going awol at work lately watching Red Dwarf and Bottom

Got all the Red Dwarf DVDs anyway. Most episodes are on Youtube aswell as the universe challenge thing.

"Don't gimme that Star Trek crap, it's too early in the morning"