Lance Storm's Thoughts on Raw
 

Then when a fan commented that HBK and Bret had similar dialogue during their feud he responded with

I've had similar gripes with some of Punk and Cena's promos as well as Cole's commentary.

Have you guys noticed this too? Do you think there are too many pipe bombs being dropped at the expense of the product?

This reminds me of Punks comments to Del Rio a few weeks back, about how all he ever talks about is 'his destiny'.

On one hand, it does bury Del Rio before he's 'over', but then on the other hand, what Punk said was true, and maybe could be used to push Del Rio to become better.

Yeah Cole sucks cock and makes the show unwatchable the way he buries talent.

As for wrestlers doing it to each other, whatever that doesn't bother me as long as it's not boring.

I thought Cena's interactions with Del Rio were rough. Especially that one exchange where Del Rio was the champ and Cena called him the third wheel and pissed all over his championship win.

Punk's exchanges with Nash were pretty bad too. He pretty much slaughtered Nash and killed any desire I had to see them feud, even for shits and giggles. Nash isn't a slouch on the mic either.

i think he is still mad at the boring chant stone cold started on him.

Haha. Just like that dumb ass "What" chant Austin started. It did kind of fuck him though since Storm was actually entertaining in the ring but no matter what he did the crowd was too busy using all their brain cells to chant boring to notice that he was actually good in the ring.

Yeah, this happens all too often. The biggest one this year being that Triple H could have a better match with a broomstick than most of the roster. This is something that really needs to stop unless the situation warrants it. Today, nine times out of ten, it doesn't.

If only one person does it and "it's their thing," it's fine (CM Punk).....But when too many people do it, it's far too often.....

LOL, WTF?! Cole tells it like it is. And yet people still hate him for it. Amazing.

DAMN iNATOR, ladies and gentlemen.

Yup, telling the truth and being entertaining are always the same thing. No exceptions.

But wrestling is only cool when you drop the gimmick, break the fourth wall, and act like it's REAL!

Shit, someone already beat me to the satire. :(

What specific example from last night's Raw was he referring to?

KK, it's not satire if it's not satirising anything.

Which is great, but completely irrelevant in this instance.

oh, you all would do things differently if you were in charge?

ok.

5 Star Quality!

What Lance says is 100% true, and it reminds me of when Alberto Del Rio was feuding with John Cena, where Cena kept pointing out that the cars that Del Rio comes out in aren't really his.

It does nothing to help the guys get over.

What are you satirising, exactly? No one has said that wrestling is only cool if you break the fourth wall, yet that seems to be the only target of your post. Flat.

Punk and Cole pretty much do the same thing, but because Punk is indyrific, he's cool.

What satire? I was being completely serious and not joking in any way whatsoever.

That makes your post even sadder.

You know, I was watching RAW and all I could think of last night was how Lance Storm felt about the show. Im sure glad he decided to post his opinions on twitter. Now I feel better knowing how he feels about RAW.

Yes.

It's not the target, it's the hyperbole of the sentiment. You do understand how satire works, right? Because your statement there displays none whatsoever. This is kind of a crucial piece of the very nature of satire.

Do you nitpick Rudyard Kipling? "But nobody said 'White Man's Burden!' Therefore it's not satire!"

Howabout Mark Twain? his indictments of things like racism and society are by and large based around such hyperbolic indications that "no one has said."

Gore Vidal? Oh, who am I kidding. Kane Knight is too complex for you, there's no way you've read and understood Kipling or Twain or Vidal.

Dammit, stop telling it like it is!

You should speak in third person more often. I really cracked up at that.

Do not ever compare yourself to Twain. Ever.

And way to take what I said completely out of context to fit your will. Racism and class struggles existed -- the "sentiment" you are exaggerating is entirely irrelevant and ineffective in anything more than an "Epic fat man is fat" sense. You're about as satirical as a Wayan Brothers movie.

I hope you find a way to work off the terrible karma you have for comparing yourself to such figures of literacy. Also, you go on thinking you are "too complex" for me. You're a 2D internet meme that occasionally presents an intelligent thought wrapped in attempts to be funny or witty (sometimes you succeed -- sometimes not). Maybe in real life, there is a sad story that a Sodenbergh could get to the bottom of; but complexity is certainly not the issue on TPWW, chum.

Ugh, do not encourage any more of an ego complex in the man. Really.

I don't think it really matters to KK. He was launching at attack at your tastes more than anything. Basically, if it's your taste to like Cole, you're wrong; because anything positive written about him must be satire.

"Basically", that's what this forum is all about. You MUST like what everybody else likes.

There are differences between the two. Cole is the lead announcer, and supposed to be an unbiased character -- and often does try to do so. It's inconsistent in lieu with his apparent heel status.

CM Punk's character (the last I saw of it, anyway) is that he goes a little deeper. He doesn't "break the fourth wall" so much as stretch the scope of the story being told beyond the reach of the cameras. Punk basically acknowledges that there are on-goings off-screen. Punk hasn't really buried anyone since getting on the mic. You could argue that he takes shots at John Laurinaitis -- but does that guy really need credibility given that he's a suit? I haven't been watching lately, though -- maybe his character has changed.

Now, I don't even hate the Michael Cole character. I think he could be a useful tool in getting both faces and heels over. I do think that he needs to leave the booth, however. It's kind of unsettling when you are supposed to dislike the dude that is telling you the story you are listening to. Have Cole become a character elsewhere and Josh Mathews or Jim Ross could take over.

Not everyone is like that. In fact, even KK has gone on to defend the opinion of the minority when there's a chance of antagonising someone by doing so. Hell, the guy has even defended me when there is a fresher fight to be had.

I think the bigger point is that you must not take anyone here too seriously. I will throw walls of text around like candy, because I enjoy it. But the moment you start taking this shit too seriously, you end up like one of the poor rooks who gets tormented and then leaves before they have a chance to contribute. Just throw your thoughts out there and don't take the trolling too seriously.

But yeah -- Michael Cole is shit. :p

lol. People are really claiming that there is no difference between what CM Punk does and what Michael Cole does? Come on.

The Sandman did the same thing Steve Austin did but everyone praises Steve Austin. STUPID IWC!

Austin perfected it, though. Made it much better.

And could actually wrestle, too.

I uh... I'm aware.

And we're all aware that Sandman did the "beer drinking thing" before Steve Austin, too, so don't get picky, guy.

You'll have to excuse Aguakate. He doesn't understand...anything.

I understand your analogy, #1-wwf-fan.

Thank you, everybody but Aquakate.