Lita's wrestling school put on hold.
 

<font color=cyan>(ap) Amy Dumass’ dreams of owning her own wrestling school have become very bleak within the past 48 hours. Due to many mishaps that wrestling fans everywhere are calling “Botches” the school looks like it won’t make it’s January 11th, 2005 opening.
Allan Ways, head of construction, made the following comments- “Lita wanted to plan everything herself… even design the blue print. Unfortunately for her it’s not good to cross power lines with running water, there were no doors, we cannot build a “Room Of Requirement,” and her ring was 8 feet off the ground with no stairs or ladders. If that’s not bad enough the sign that she ordered came from a company that makes neon signs for Chinese restaurants. Who would want to learn how to wrestle at Lita’s House Of Rice?”
Wrestling Fans everywhere rejoiced at this news, however. Life long fan and part time cult follower Daniel Cea stated “Dude, she can’t do anything right. Her promo’s suck, she can’t wrestle without screwing up, she can’t sing, and the only thing that makes her look good is her hair and tits.” Then Daniel Cea was told that Lita tried to get a wrestling school up. “:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:!!!!! Okay, okay, okay, where’s the camera? Hey, did I make it on Punk’d? I mean, she even botched being Hispanic!”
Some people did not take the wrestling school as a joke. Independent wrestler known as The Messiah was quoted as “Well, I figured my wrestling skill can’t get any worse. I was also hoping that she could upgrade my persona. Ever since that Mordecai dude showed up on the scene I’ve got nothing.” Lita’s potential school also attracted former WWE World Heavyweight Champion Bill Goldberg. He said “I wunt to be able to kut uh pwomo wit ouit soundin leik uh gwunting wetaad. <I>*grunts*</I>”
Mixed reactions are flowing over this announcement. When we reached Lita for comment she was too busy trying to get the person in the mirror to stop mimicking her.

:rofl:

Lita, wrestling in the same sentecne! :rofl:

Is this true, or are you just goofing around?

:wtf:

Wait... this article is a joke right?

Damn...

I was hoping i could have an excuse to grapple Lita. (As Long As She Wears Her Heavy Make-Up)

<font color=cyan>Yes Indeed! Just ask Allan Ways... Well, it's Al for short...
Al Ways.

Always!

Damn, and I was thinking it was put on hold because she's pregnant. :shifty:

<font color=cyan>Isn't in great? I mean, the time I posted this, the title of it, the story line... I'm almost funny! :rofl:

Lita teaching wrestling scares the hell out of me. But I guess it would give Lance's students some people to carry.

:lol:

Let's be realistic, They'd push Lita's students, because they could jump off of hiigh things.

:( Lance's students :(

Lita wouldn't even have plans to make a wrestling school; she'd botch dialing the number to call the contractors.

:yes:

This is a spoof right?




right?




right?





No seriously, right?

:lol: right on

that was genius. definitely rep-worthy. I'd rep you twice if I could.

It sounds real, donit?

<font color=cyan>Late nights + beer = This post
Alas, now all of you know why I made this :D

Lita would just put her students in a real dungeon and forget to let them out. :(

Is she gonna teach her own touches she added to the business like not being able to run and changing infront of all the boys?

Be honest. Would we, the fans, be that lucky?

:'(