SmackDown! Captions 10/07/04
 

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"Joo stoopid fool! Big or small pics? Which one joo gonna stick with? Joo not cool at all!!!"




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Carlito (staring down): ..................
Cena: ................
Carlito: ............
Cena: ..........
Carlito: Yeh... that's bird shit.

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Renee's new pants were pretty nifty. They gave strange euphemisms for whatever sexual deeds other wrestlers did to him.

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At around this time, Bud Bundy regretted agreeing to try to get that picture with King Kong Bundy.

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Announcer: "Oh, miscommunication results in a missed exchange, and that'll cost Show and Jindrak in the Antigravity High Fiving Competition!"

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In better or shape or not, Big Show couldn't get the EZ Fold Chair open either.

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Red X right now.

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This was definitely the coolest looking spinebuster in history.

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Here you see Cena nanoseconds after Stevie's ass darts penetrated his pants and micromoments before John feels it.

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CCC: Eh... it's not my fault, fool. Cuz Carlito is always cool. Yeah I'm talking to you. Recognize that I rule.
Vince: Okay, the scripter hander outer guy is fired.

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In their continuous quest to recycle old gimmicks, the writers come up with Mr. Junkyard American Ramon.

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"Ahahaha! Yup, you got me. I'm really Kurt Angle under a giant wig. Hahahaha."

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Rey: "619!"
Rene: "You idiot, your meant to kick me in the head"
Rey: "But I a....oh right, wrong head!"

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Jindrak is blind and looses his footing, the result of Big Show's newest haircut shining under Smackdown's lights.

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Finally, the return of King Kong Bundy

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Calito: "Hey nothing is here....the glass ceiling is gone!"

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Moppy lives on!


Sorry, these were all crap

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Up your nose with a rubber hose.

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CCC: I SAID A DOLLAR! DO YOU HAVE A DOLLAR?
John: murhhhhh...why do you wanna go there?
CCC: I WANT A DOLLAR!
John: murhhhh....isnt he dead yet?
CCC: What did you drink last night?
John: Yeah, you can have it.
CCC: A Dollar?
John:......why do you wanna go there?

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Anti-gravity bath usage 101:
Notice how Mr Rey's technique of climbing out of the bath uses his biceps and leg strength to muscle his way out. However, Mr Rene seems to have forgotten which way you sit in a bath.

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Show: AHHHHH, I CANT FIND JINDRAK

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Jindrak: DAMN rope trap!

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Dont EVER show photos of Kane and litas honey moon to Big Show on a steel chair.

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Nobody was fat enough to save Cena and Cool from the bottomless Smackdown burial chamber.

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Move outa the way when Sean does spring cleaning.

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...and Nova's gone to jobville...

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"So thats what Lesbian siamise surgery looks like"

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"You trying having dignity with purple speedos on"

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Pineapple head strikes again!

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Rey wasnt exactly keen on Rene's new, perverted gimmick, "The Wrench Tickler: Molester of Tools"...

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Olmec opens his mouth to allow the children into his fortress...
Big Show: Damnit, I knew I shouldn't have shaved my head...

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Big Show proves he can do two things at once... Punch a guy AND point to his knees! Although he was a WEEE bit off on the knees, so no cigar...

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Penis Head attacks Big Show with a steel chair...
Show: EWW! EWW! HE'S DISGUSTING! GET HIM AWAY! **Big Boot to the chair**

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Worst. Botched Tornado DDT. Ever.
Lita: Even I could do worse... I mean better...

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Carlito was so exited about his first match that he wet himself, and the mat, and soon, John Cena...

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Carlito: I dun think I could BE any cooler!

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Carlito: I stan corrected!

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Carlito and his invisible pet cockatiel celebrate his big win...

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Carlito: ..yo.. can you get me Austin's autograph.. he's right there.

Cena: er...W's EVERYWHERE! AHH!

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Signs that Dupree has a fetish.

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Show: NOW can I surf the web..??

Jindrak: ..must find weakness.. like in.. Ren and Stimpy..

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Big Show uses the oldest trick in the book to defeat Jindrak -- The Banana Peel.

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Greatest. Van Daminator. Ever !

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Cena: Oh, Shit! I gotta finish that movie! Fill in!

Carlito: OK.. hey, isn't that Mistah Kotter over there ?

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Cena: Big Bang Attack!

CCC: ...um, it's not wor.. um, NARUTO IS BETTER!

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Carlito became the first ever Co- US Title champion, after the ref got his fingers stuck in the buttons.

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CCC, doing a damn good impression of the robot Clown from Pee-Wee's Big Adventure.
OR
Carlito: Damn, gonMad! You make unfunny posts AND you double thread.. WATTSUPWITTHAT?!

Guy in the back: NO! That's HEIDEN-REICH!

end.. blah.

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They were right, the camera does add 10lbs, much to Kurt Angle's dismay.

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The East Coast/West Coast rap battles got pretty low when adversaries resort to spitting at each other.

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Rene: "Not a stickler for a tickler, eh, mon amis?"
Rey: "Nope, not a tickler stickler."

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Big Show was confused. The forecaster definitely did not predict that it would be raining Natural Born Thrillers.

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Introducing: Your NEW WWE US Champion --- Screech Powers.

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"Oh, God! Look at that guy with the funny hair! ... Oh wait, that's just the Titantron."

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<font color=goldenrod>Scary Spice makes her WWE debut.</font>

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Yeah,your right I DO suck!

:love:

also

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No Caption needed for that one. :D

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"I'm the real John Cena!"

A rare captioning appearance by yours truly :shifty:http://repository.wwe.com/galleries/.../images/01.jpg
After spitting on Cena did little to generate heat, Carlito used the oldest trick in the book: show the crowd that you're going commando.

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Rey froze in terror, even though he wanted to warn Rene that someone behind him was going to take the advice on his tights.

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Show: IT DOESN'T LOOK LIKE A CUE BALL! :mad:

..more like a polished bowling ball really.

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Jindrak freezes mid-dropkick as he sees the Hindenburg II about to make its first ever landing.

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Angle: But really, its made of 100% iron ore, and painted with the finest enamel known to man!
Show: THE SIGN SAYS NO DOOR TO DOOR SALESMEN!

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Joey Radd's didn't react well after he seeing his penis all over the internet.

(sorry I went there :p)

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This image from an ultra rapid camera catches the instant before Cena hits CCC after holding onto the rope and stretching it back 100 feet for impact.

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Cool: Okay joo can take the belt off me, man.
Ref: I seem to be having a bit of trouble with the clasps.
Cool: Don't have much experience with ladies bras, eh? Thas not cool.
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Cool: *to hot chick in crowd* I'm a prisoner of your love, baby.
Chick: Get bent.

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Cool: Didn't I tell you man? I had this title victory locked up

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Carlito: I lost the origional American Idol, changed carears and now I'm a champion. Cool.

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:lol: Nice Family Guy/Seinfeld ref.

You know, I saw Justin Guarnin (spelling's probably off) on TV the other day, and I thought exactly the same thing. :lol:

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Show: Flair! Havent seen ya in a while, whats up? *Steps forward*
Jinrdrak: (Gasping for air) *cough* GLAGALGLA CHAHCHA! AHHH! AH!

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CCC: Yo, Cena. Wake up. Wake up, the show started already!
Cena: Oh, man, I just had this awful dream that I had just won the U.S. Title after being screwed for so long and then I immediately lost it to this Macy Gray-looking, green jobber guy.

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Rey takes a breath of fresh air after escaping from the belly of Rene Dupree.

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In a flash of panic, Jindrak began to eat Big Show's foot.

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Big Show plays his new Mark Jindrak-shaped yo-yo.

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Kurt calls upon ancient magical forces to turn the chair into a portable vortex capable of sucking the Big Show in.

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CCC: Cena! Don't into the light!!! DON'T GO INTO THE LIGHT!
Cena: It's so beautiful....

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Cena is almost about to land the punch but get mysteriously yanked off-screen by someone unknown force.

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CCC: Come on, they HAD to give me the title. It's the only thing that looks good on me.

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Carlito is so entranced by his victory that he fails to notice the flock of birds laying eggs in his hair.

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"Watch me make you all disappear! Really, just look at the attendance figures!"

Why is it that only Carlito is the only one allowed to have hair anymore?

He doesn't look like Triple H.

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I said, don't call me Razor Ramon!

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In a desperate attempt to increase sales and expand their market, various sex toy manufacturers started renting add space on the trunks of pro wrestlers.

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He took my Chef Boyardee ravioli!

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Carlito: That's not a bad thing...that's a good thing.....hey, are you listening to me??

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AsMadonna's "Strike a pose" song started playing, Carlito couldn't help but play along

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This week Queer Eye for the Straight guy will feature a celeb make over on pro-wrestler Carlito Cool.

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everyone had heard the rumors, but you still cant help to be shocked when you see renee dupree's large french fry wearing a mask

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guy sebastion from Australian idol makes his debut in the wwe

(suppose only me and Aussie Skier will no that one sorry :-\ )

Hey y'all.
It's been a while, so these'll probably suck more than a group of hookers at a Dyson factory.



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Carlito: Get up, John. We're having a match.
Cena: Nah...no point.
Carlito: This is my big break, man!
Cena: That's what you think. Give it 8 weeks and you'll be back at OVW having matches with Matt Monroe, and being Shanique's bitch.

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Rey despaired when he discovered that even a 619 to the nuts won't stop a french-canadian who thinks he's on a sinking Titanic.

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Big Show gave the commentators the new name for his latest move, 'The Side Order' when he told a guy in the audience to go get him 18 portions of fries, 9 portions of onion rings and a diet coke.

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Jindrak slips on Carlito's banana skin.

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WHAD'YA MEAN THERE's NO DIET COKE!?!?!?!?!

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It's been a while since Cena delivered a decent F-U, so understandably things went a bit pear-shaped.


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Cena slips on Carlito's banana skin.


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Carlito: Big Show sent me out to collect his fries.
Brian: Wait! I haven't got the weight-lifting belt on.

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I'm Afro-can-American....get it?

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Carlito: Hey.....you're a funny guy, but you need to stop landing paper airoplanes in my hair, man. It's not cool!

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Hey, look at my Jedi wrestling trick!

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Brain: "When are these guys going to learn to put these belts on themselves? I am really uncomfortable being this close to Carlito's ass...yet at the same time I am strangely aroused."