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02-19-2004, 06:44 PM
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#1 | |
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As over as Crystal Pepsi
Posts: 21,639
  
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SmackDown Captions (02/19/04)
Alrighty, SmackDown hasn’t even aired in America yet… It’s 3:30pmish here, and the pics are up! Once again, sorry for the Matt Hardy post… That just sucked.
 Cena: Come on Kurt! Let’s get this promo done with! I gotta use the little boys room!  Kurt: So Triple H and HBK think they’re the only ones that can do the vase, huh? Cena: You said it best Kurt, It’s true.  Right now is not the best time for the ref to try to seduce the wrestlers.  Ref: Well Basham, I have some good news and I have some bad news… Basham: What’s the bad news? Ref: It looks like since your team lost the tag team titles you’ll be as over as the team of Taka and Barry Horwitz… But the good news is I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by switching to geicko!  Kurt: Come on Cena! You’re not even trying to do the vase! Cena: That’s because that gag only works with the right camera angle!  Sally Struthers Voice Over: After a few months of turning face, this potential main eventer is getting ready to be buried, but please, you could help. Just dial 1-800-Mid-Carder for more information. He’s reaching out to you… will you reach out?  As Kurt carried the invisible sandwich the Basham was stuck to the ropes because of Rhyno’s and the SmackDown fist came to destroy everything while God looked on. Vince: Now this is good booking!  No Vince, it’s not good booking. Just look at the fan in the black shirt falling asleep.  Kurt: See! Now you’re getting the vase joke right! Cena: The fans can’t see it. Kurt: You don’t have to do that “can’t see me” bit with the vase! The vase speaks for itself! Cena: -sigh- Whatever, Kurt. Now get off my ass about the vase.  At this point Paul was very thankful for his hand held mirror.  Vince: The WrestleMania XX Cartoon! Everyone likes cartoons! That’s a great idea Hunter! Hunter: Anything to make Raw more credible than SmackDown, I mean help out the company.  Pieces of the “all midcarders must be buried” clause fell from the ceiling as Sean O’Haire used them as confetti.  Eddie: Come on! Let’s party, ese! Let’s live it up before Vince sees a credible wrestler with the title! Belty: I’m so happy, I could cry… Eddie: Same here Belty… Same he… A TALKING BELT!?!?!?  The new WWE lawn furniture wasn’t getting over.  Chavo Jr: See Eddie! We can be a team! Belty: Shut up, Midcarder!!! You stupid midcarder!!! I’ll bury you!!! Chavo Jr: -GASP!!!- Eddie!!! Eddie: I’m sorry ese! It wasn’t me talking! It was the belt! Chavo Jr: Belts don’t talk! Quote:
Last edited by FourFifty; 02-19-2004 at 07:12 PM. |
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02-19-2004, 06:45 PM
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#2 |
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As over as Crystal Pepsi
Posts: 21,639
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 This isn’t holding up talent…  Another week passes when the Show does not get his prematch snack.  Brock: God… I know we don’t talk much, but here me out… I miss Belty…. Oh man, I really miss Belty… The nights we had cookies and milk together, the people we buried, and all the other moments… if you could please reunite us, I promise to go to church every week… :tear: I miss Belty…  Now Stevie Richards is going after the refs on other shows!  Paul: Kurt, put on a shirt for God’s sake… You look like the love child of Steve Austin and A-Train.  This isn’t as bad as Bradshaw’s bronco buster last week.  Chavo Jr: No Eddie! Stay down here! You can’t be too elevated! I’ll be lonely!!!  Chavo Sr. could only look on… it’s been a while since he’s seen midget wrestling, with a midget ref.  Kurt: I hope you’re watching this, Earl! See! Eddie is NOT tapping, so I am NOT calling for the bell!  Belty: YOU NO GOOD NO TALENT HACK! I’LL BURRY YOU ALIVE YOU PIECE OF CRAP!!! Chavo Jr: Eddie! Why must you be so mean??? Eddie: It’s NOT me!  Kurt works on his shadow puppets in mid match.  Kurt: Oh the power… oh GOD the power! It’s almost orgasmic… OH THE POWER!!! Vince: Okay Kurt… you’re scaring me… now get out of my chair.  Kurt shows of his new WWE sneakers, regardless of the fact that there was still a match in the ring.  Maybe Triple H could spy on SmackDown unnoticed if he didn’t drive up to the ring.  Thing points out to the one with the higher IQ. Woo-hoo! 300th post! Last edited by FourFifty; 02-19-2004 at 07:26 PM. |
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02-19-2004, 07:07 PM
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#3 |
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Ron Paul 4 EVA
Posts: 152,467
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 That's kinda stupid to put 'em up before the show airs... Oh well...I'll prolly be back to caption 'em after I've watched the show... |
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02-19-2004, 07:28 PM
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#4 | |
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As over as Crystal Pepsi
Posts: 21,639
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Quote:
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02-19-2004, 07:45 PM
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#5 |
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Ball So Hard University
Posts: 8,450
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Gonna do mine as I watch it I guess. Then post when it's over.
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02-19-2004, 07:48 PM
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#6 |
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WOOOOOOOOO!
Posts: 12,237
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Kurt: look at me...I'm Goldberg! |
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02-19-2004, 08:12 PM
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#7 |
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One Man Horror Show
Posts: 1,046
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Alright, I'm game. Sometimes it's easier to do captions when I have no idea what the hell is going on.
 Embarassed, Cena tries to explain to Kurt what happened to his laundry when he accidentally mixed his yellow cap in with his whites. John knew he had to be punished for wearing the yellow clothes, but being chained in the center of the ring while Kurt sings the Best of Barry Manilow? THat was both cruel and unusual! As Shaniqua was sent down to OVW, she got her revenge by unleashing her new monster, the Rabid Ref! Unfortunately, she'd given him the brain of some fellow named Germaine Shepperd... As Kurt desperately tries to retrieve the One Ring for to cast into The Cracks of Doom, Gollum works himself into a schitzophrenic froth. Kurt: "Uh... John... nearsighted much?" John: "Everybody out there! Listen to me! Soylent Green is SEAN O'HAIRE! SEAN O'HAIRE!!!!!!" Danny Basham froze when he realized that the Titantron wasn't showing the match as it was happening now, but rather he was seeing himself getting thrashed by Kurt Angle three minutes in the future. ... Uh... OH! Wrestling as it was meant to be: Greco-Roman and naked. When Dawn found Paul, stiff, unmoving, and with a suspicious bulge in his pants, she realized that she'd done it again. And this delightful WWE-commisioned mural depicts the time when a 500 foot tall Eddie Guerrero devoured New York. Eddie's plans to cut another incredible promo had to be put on hold when the 100 Millionth WWE fan entered the arena. Eddie: "And to make sure nobody takes this belt away from me, I had it surgically grafted to my shoulder. Viva la raza!" And the crowd was doubly amazed when Eddie's talking penis put on an entertaining promo. Eddie: "Edward James Olmos! YOU'RE the 100 Millionth fan?" Chavo Sr.: "For the last time, I'm not...." Chavo Jr.: "THIS is the party you promised for your title win? Balloons and confetti? Where are the strippers, dammit! I want strippers!!!" Last edited by El Santo; 02-19-2004 at 09:20 PM. |
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02-19-2004, 08:46 PM
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#8 |
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Ball So Hard University
Posts: 8,450
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In yet another attempt from the WWE to prove that they didn't discriminate against handicapped persons, they hired their new "special" talent and pushed him to Kurt Angle's level. Kurt Angle wasn't impressed by the feats of the magician John Hoocena. Kurt thought he'd be doing The Bashams a favor by pulling off the arm with the elbow pad on it, so they could NEVER be discovered. I've heard that Kurt Angle is a "stiff worker", but this is just ridiculous. This time Rhyno had truly gone too far. Cena and Angle deliberate how to keep their match kayfabe, and decided upon doing spot after spot of Benoit-like non-release moves. TOASTY!Luckily for Kurt, he was quick enough to dodge Triple H's fist. The Basham wasn't as fortunate. John Cena performs the Fire Marshall's Carry. (Dedicated to someone's original "Fire Marshall Bill" caption.) The Cable Guy strikes again, but nobody believes Angle! Paul Heyman rolls his eyes in disappointment, for a second he'd thought Trish Stratus had jumped rosters. Vince: "And so, I present to you, the ultimate tool in attracting the Latino market." JR: "Bah gawd Vince. Brilliant." Vince: "Yeah, I know. Now Ross, I want you to start announcing with a Latino accent." JR: "I'll do my best, Steve." Vince: "..." JR: "And look at this man, Eddie Guerrdddadadadadaderdo. BAH GAWD UNPRDADADADADADAETTIERDADADAD STUNERDADADADADA." Eddie thought he had everything under control and celebrated having the belt. But he had fallen into Triple H's trap, and the ring began to bubble and boil into a melting pit of lava... Triple H: "Ooooooooo-hohohoho. Aaaaaaaaa-hohohohoho. Feecha howaki "Smack Down Title." Hooooooooo-hohohohoho." It was bad enough for Eddie to steal fornature, but to steal the WWE ring was a little much. In their game of Pinata, Chavo threw a trantrum when Eddie got the WWE belt and Chavo got the Cruiserweight belt. |
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02-19-2004, 08:47 PM
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#9 |
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Ball So Hard University
Posts: 8,450
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Big Show misunderstood Vince backstage, when he was told to "Carry the jobber." Steven Richards shows us exactly why he is called Hardcore Holly. OR Inspired by Earl Hebner, this ref wasn't taking no shit off of anyone, and did a running baseball slide to Richards when he tried to interfere. Lesnar looks up to the skies, looking for the advice of Triple H on how to survive going a few weeks without the title. Apparently, Lesnar had caught wind that Cheech Marin was the mole on the internet. Kurt Angle was stunned. This wasn't what he had in mind when the WWE mentioned a "new angle." With the push that Eddie had been getting, Chavo was a little upset about where that put his head when compared to his uncle. Eddie reveals his new finisher: "The Angry Chihuahua." When the ref was paranoid of Eddie's reputation of lying, cheating and stealing, he suspected Guerrero to have a foreign object. Luckily, Steven Richards was in the house to give the routine inspection. Kurt: "Mmmmmmmm, pretzel..." Chavo had talent. Chavo was doing well. But Chavo got buried, and Chavo was awarded an insignificant title. There was only one thing to do, to complete the circle. Lock on The Walls of Jericho. Kurt, having forgotten how to count to three, looked to the fans for aid. But they weren't much help. Kurt Angle does his impression of Triple H booking matches. Eddie could not BELIEVE that Chavo kicked out of the Angry Chihuahua. Having forgotten his lines, Angle checked the cue cards on the top right. "Smack? Ow? I can handle that!" Angle got a little defensive when Triple H said his title was 'bigger' than his. Last edited by Rock Bottom; 02-20-2004 at 02:17 AM. |
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02-19-2004, 08:52 PM
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#10 |
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SEX APPEAL
Posts: 13,830
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[
Cena: Hehe, you said "suck." |
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02-19-2004, 08:55 PM
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#11 |
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One Man Horror Show
Posts: 1,046
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Show: "WHOA. Now I know why they call you HARDcore Holly..." As the ref slipped yet again, the WWE production crew reconsidered their policy of waxing the wrestling mat. Brock: "Dear Heavenly Father... tell me, what must I do to win back the belt?" 'God': "My son, you must first go to RAW. And then you must find the one who is adorned in pink hotpants, and job yourself to him." Brock: "Thank you, Lord, I will do as you... nice try, Steven." 'God': "Dammit." Medic: "This looks suspicious! Men, put your gloves on! Full cavity search!" Ref: (weakly) "nnnnnn-nnnoooooo......." Kurt: "Uh, Paul... You weren't just involved in that 'cavity search' angle, were you?" I was about to do a caption about Eddie and his "Little Man", but given that Eddie and Chavo are related, the caption just got far too creepy for words. For the poor camera on the right, the fight between an Uncle and his Nephew just hit to situations too close to home, and he broke down emotionally. Chavo Sr. was tempted, but he knew, deep down inside, that Eddie's game of pattycake was all a ruse. In an incredible show of mental effort, Kurt uses the Force to break Chavo's hold. Chavo: "Say Uncle!" Eddie: "You dumbass. I AM your Uncle, ese!" Chavo: "Uh... right. Say Nephew, then! ... No, wait, that's lame. DAMMIT!" Kurt hesistated. The moment was perfect to play "Got Your Nose," but .... with whom? Kurt: "Yessssss.... My preccciouusssss...." JR: "Bah Gawd! Ah don't believe this! The One Ring has taken control of Kurt Angle! He ... has gone... completely ... INSANE!" Tazz: "Get out of my seat, you redneck." Kurt: "This is so embarassing. Does Chavo always suck his thumb?" Eddie: "You don't know the half of it, ese..." When mini-Angle saved the day by leaping onto Kurt's head, Eddie knew that he had taken one blow too many. Kurt: "And, on Wrestlemania, I'll be where the USA is on this belt... RIGHT ON TOP!" [offstage]: "Psst.... Kurt... You're holding it upside down..." Kurt: "Son of a..." |
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02-19-2004, 09:53 PM
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#12 |
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Ball So Hard University
Posts: 8,450
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lol, wish there was a picture of Eddie blading his pec for no reason. would have loved to caption that.
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02-19-2004, 09:58 PM
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#13 |
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Crash Bang
Posts: 21,391
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Eddie thought he could call out Hardcore Holly by spelling out his name. Heyman took the "Smackdown!" logo on Kurt's shoulder a bit too literally. |
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02-19-2004, 11:35 PM
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#14 |
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Inno Knows.
Posts: 43,710
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"ACK, SPIDER!" Cena didn't appreciate Angle's rendition of "I Just Died In Your Arms Tonight" Rick Steiner re-debuts after losing a lot of muscle Ref: ...wait...I must draw you Rhyno's back to his old tricks Cena: I'M NOT TELLING YOU ANYTHING YOU DON'T ALREADY KNO-- Ref: *whack* what did Lord Vince tell you about uttering those lines? Angle flashes back to his days in county .... and that one day in the shower room..... The Basham titty-twister gets Cena yet again Cena: You can be my wingman anytime Angle: Bullshit.....you can be mine Paul: Do you love me this much? Guerrerozilla vs. Wrestlemania XX logo, a new FOX special Vince: Ah shit, Eddie got into the sauce again Eddie: There you are turnbuckle, I've been waiting to give you a piece of my mind....YOU STINK!.....YOU AND YOUR WHOLE OPERATION STINK!.....I QUIT! Eddie marks his territory as new WWE Champion Eddie: Yo holmes stop checking out my ass ese WWE logo: Sorry... "Get your arm off me Chavo!" Chavo: Oh sorry Stevie |
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02-20-2004, 12:09 AM
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#15 |
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Inno Knows.
Posts: 43,710
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Show: You don't want to sell cotton candy? Go join Sean! Hardcore: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO Big Show hides his bad hair day by dressing it as a ref's body ...........didn't fool anyone Brock: Have a good time up there Holly! Hardcore: Dammit Sean: Hey whats up Bob? Medic: Did he touch you here? Chavo: Yes, Uncle Vinnie touched me there Paul: Gondor asks for aid Kurt.... Kurt: For the last time this isn't Middle Earth! God smiles upon the new WWE Champion Eddie: Yo Cheech you were the man in Up In Smoke ese Chavo: Son of a Kurt: Wait.....I can feel him.... Cole: CHAVO! CHAVO! CHAVO! Tazz: What a great first episode of MACKdown! Kurt: You can dance when you want to, you can leave your friends behind, cause your friends don't dance- Eddie: And if they don't dance Kurt: Dammit this isn't sing along with the ref! Kurt: IT WAS ME! JR: BAH GAWD. Angle admits to being the hummer driver, hitting Austin, and raising the briefcase, BAH GAWD STUNNER As you can see, Eddie is very territorial over his dinner Angle: I'll never let go Eddie Eddie: .......damn Last edited by Innovator; 02-20-2004 at 10:10 AM. |
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02-20-2004, 12:22 AM
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#16 |
Posts: 18,357
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Stop posting these so early, Always!!!! I haven't read any except Always's... sorry if any jokes were repeated.
Cena: "Touch your forearm!" Angle: *sigh* "Stealing Eddie's gig, eh kid? And it's KNEES, not forearm." Angle: "Oh, and another thing... AlbertaBritishColumbiaManitobaNewBrunswickNewfoundlandandLabradorNorthwestTerritoriesNovaScotiaNunav otOntarioPrinceEdwardIslandQuebecSaskatchewanYukon. BIOTCH!!!" Cena:  Angle had things under control until Danny made the tag to Stevie. Hebner: "So a rooster lays an egg on the middle of a sloped roof. Which side does it roll down?" Danny: "I don't know! I DON'T KNOW! Please stop!!" Hebner: "WRONG ANSWER! Kurt, increase the pressure!" Cena: "Why the hell did you have to use Rhyno's 'face lotion?'" Poor Cena. The cameraman had his Precious and Doug was holding him down, and all Hebner could do was silly hand puppets! Angle: "Wrestling with the Bashams now? Screw that. Invisible jetpack AWAY!!!" Cena had the unique ability take a shit and carry some at the same time. It was bad enough they were both suddenly naked. Did Cena really have to jack off as well? Those new ceiling, wall, and floor convex mirrors were really starting to prove their worth. Wrestlemania Spoiler: The Artist Formerly Known As Prince defeats Eddie Guerrero to become new WWE Champion. Millions of internet smarks smack their TV's off the roof. Tragically, Sean O'Haire got too close to the fan. Eddie was ecstatic until something in the rafters caught his eye. "The belt is fake, all your base belong to us, love Hunter???" Eddie demonstrates the "What to do during a Hardcore Holly promo" position. Chavo gets incredible heel heat by insulting the city's native ballon population. |
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02-20-2004, 12:29 AM
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#17 | |
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As over as Crystal Pepsi
Posts: 21,639
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Quote:
Sorry man, I don't plan on posting them later  Lotsa peeps read the spoilers, and sometimes it works better if people have no idea wtf is going on in the pics. Oh, and by the way.... *LMAFO!!!!!!* |
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02-20-2004, 12:39 AM
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#18 |
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Spammy Certified
Posts: 46,115
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Chavo: who sucks now!? Fans: YOU!!!! Brock does an impression of HHH in vinces office. Eddies up to his old tricks again. |
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02-20-2004, 12:48 AM
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#19 |
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Posts: 18,357
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It didn't help that Big Show was whistling "Takin' out the trash" as he walked toward the edge of the ring. Show had it won until the ref clocked him with a nasty left. Hunter: "Admiral Lesnar?" Brock: "Yes my lord." Hunter: "You have failed me for the last time." Brock: "But please, lemme ex--- gha..chacha...hahhhckhckagt!!!" Man. That musta been one heck of a tummy ache. What Paul Said: "Child, you are HEALED!!!!" What Angle Heard: "Cool! I get to turn heel?" In trouble, Chavo unleashed the move vicious move ever: The Cajones Chomp. Eddie retaliated by absorbing Chavo into his crotch, Triple H style. Eddie: "Hey! You're standing, and I'm about to deliver a move!!!" Chavo Sr.: *sigh* After this incident, Northern Lights Suplexes were banned as well. Chavo: "Point to your knees!!!!" Eddie: "Holmes... that's just old. Get over it." Kurt: "Whew! All this refereeing is hard work. HEY RINGSIDE GUY! THROW ME A TAB!" Fans really knew Angle had turned heel when Rita decided to make her monster grow. Angle: "Hey Eddie! Here's another thing! AguascalientesBajaCaliforniaNorteBajaCaliforniaSurCampecheChiapasChihuahuaCoahuilaColimaDurangoFeder alDistrictGuanajuatoGuerreroHidalgoJaliscoMéxicoMichoacánMorelosNayaritNuevoLeónOaxacaPueblaQuerétar oQuintanaRooSanLuisPotosíSinaloaSonoraTabascoTamaulipasTlaxcalaVeracruzYucatánZacatecas!!" Eddie: "Whoa! He knows EVERY country's states and provinces in alphabetical order!" Angle: "Okay, this is gonna be tricky. Now Mr. Yankem said that the incisors are the pointy ones... or were those molars?" Belty didn't like it when Kurt called him a homo. Last edited by Corkscrewed; 02-20-2004 at 01:11 AM. |
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02-20-2004, 02:20 AM
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#20 | |
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Ball So Hard University
Posts: 8,450
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Quote:
 Top Gun. |
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02-20-2004, 02:32 AM
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#21 |
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Now. Here. Man.
Posts: 8,370
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Man, El Santo was on FIRE this go round. I laughed so hard at the Soylent Green one that I accidentally woke up my roomie.
Anyways, I'd try my hand at it, but it's 1:30 in the morning right now, and I need sleep. I'll come back when my brain isn't fried (although mine are usually funnier when it is....I'm just afraid I'm gonna pass out at the keyboard in the middle of it) |
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02-20-2004, 04:40 PM
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#22 |
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Kiss my face.
Posts: 34
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Cena's impersonation of Jazz - "Look at me, I'm a woman with a penis!" - had gone too far, as her husband Rodney Mack's entrance proved. Vince knew that getting Tazz to conduct a Cena-Angle interview was a bad idea. Brian Hebner had a feather in his cap even his father couldn't boast - helping a tentacled mutant give birth to a bald little baby. "Steal my kneepad, bitch!" "So smooth and soft..." "If you can read this, you're about to get Angle Slammed..." Cena's new gimmick "Shoehead" wasn't getting over, so he was put in a squash match. Being a true professional, he still tried to promote new Nike Shox to the camera. Angle's in for a surprise as Doug prepares his blue lightsaber. When people told Goldberg he had "chicken legs", Cena took it a bit too far - he'd tarred Goldberg's legs and was about to throw him in a bowl of feathers. After seeing his awesome genitals in the showers two years ago, Lance Storm forever haunted Kurt. I'm sorry Dawn, this is emotional for me... near the end it got pretty desperate. I was THIS far away from putting the title on YOU. Vince just KNEW that Eddie 'The Genie' Guerrero was going to be huge!   Sting's paper-cutting antics in the rafters were starting to piss Eddie off. Eddie looked very pleased with himself as his new genie powers came into use. "Sting! You have three wishes!" "I want to have the WWE Championship!" "So much so... you'd even BE the championship?" "Yes! I mean, no! Shit..." Eddie waited a while for Big Show to recover from their opening pinfall-exchange spot. To try and combine the brain-power of TWO Guerreros in his title match against Eddie, Chavo had his Dad's head grafted onto him. After encountering the 7 feet tall security guards, Bob would think again about trying to steal anti-hair loss cream from the store. Holding Bob in place, Big Show only planned "Hit Hardcore Holly Day" for WWE's jobbers, but it seemed refs wanted a piece too. When somebody mentioned "Eddie", Brock started getting emotional about his favourite movie - Pluto Nash's box office failure had always been a sore spot. Medic: Looks like someone jumped the ref, but nobody's been caught yet. Hey you, stop standing around and deliver this news to Heyman! Hmm, this attack was probably down to referee politics. He obviously didn't have a talent for the game. Chavo Sr: *opens eyes* I'M NOT EDWARD JAMES OLMOS, DAMNIT! After his encounter with Cena and the bar of soap a few weeks back, Paul had developed a fetish for soap products. "Kurt, your shirt is so soft... you must tell me the brand! NOW!" After many conversations with HBK, Eddie had not-so-subtly managed to incorporate Extreme Preaching into his matches. "YOU HAVE THE POW-AH!" Many things came with Eddie's newfound fame - including tabloid photographers coming from out of nowhere, looking for a gay scandal. After signing the wrestler with one leg, Vince though the timekeeper with Alzheimer's was a fantastic idea. Growing bored by the match, Darth Angle decided he wanted to break Chavo's back. Acting on the instructions of his watcher Hunter Giles Helmsley, Buffy the Cruiserweight Slayer planted a leg straight through the heart of Chavo. As part of "Make Like a Videogame" day, Angle gives us Hand Pacman and the Guerreros give us a male version of Fear Effect 2. Kurt had to smile to himself - he was about to unleash the best Louis Armstrong impersonation EVER. Kurt: "...what a wooonderful woooorld!" Eddie: "...the hell?" Angle just wasn't bothered about his role in "Titanic - The Musical" anymore, as the taxi waiting for him as soon as he finished proved. After Angle beat HHH for the title, Hunter's hand began getting withdrawal symptoms after a few minutes. |
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02-20-2004, 04:57 PM
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#23 |
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Spammy Certified
Posts: 46,115
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So Paul how BIG is it? |
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02-20-2004, 07:25 PM
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#24 |
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Fthagn?
Posts: 10,042
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Kurt really wasn't impressed with Cena's "I Will Always Love You" cover. Kurt: I'm going to give you some advice. Don't go in the demon seas.. Cena: ... Basham A couldn't resist waving to his mother in the front row. That crazy show off. Ref: Just giving you the heads up. Any pushes you had or will ever have, has been transferred to Triple H's air time for RAW. Even nose to nose, the SmackDown! Championship Stare Down was a huge success. Until Triple H came down, and nailed the Pedigree once again for the win. Caught between a Mid-Carder humping his leg, and a ref telling him several bad jokes, Cena cried out in pain for someone, something, ANYTHING! Kurt: Okay, just do a spring board off the ropes, and I'll catch you.. Basham: I don't know Kurt... Kurt: Aww, come on, do I look like Steve Richards, Rhyno, or Ric Flair? Basham: Hey, I can see my house from here! Kurt: So..uh..you wanna go the sushi bar later? Cena: Naw, I think I'm just gonna go out to the China Wok... Kurt: Can I come alo... Cena: No, that's quite okay. Paul shows Dawn the "Hunter Battle Position." Wow...the Rock looks different... Eddie looked at the confettie falling, and laughed. He then spoke: Eddie: Hey...wha' happen'? (Rep to the reference) Eddie: Heh..'Ow ya' doin'? This is what happens when you don't pay your bills. You're left with just the pipes in your house as furniture. Chavo: Because you don't deserve to be here, in the great city of NEW ORLEANS! Crowd:  ...  BOOOOO
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02-20-2004, 10:06 PM
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#25 |
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As over as Crystal Pepsi
Posts: 21,639
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Hunter: ...and with that offering, Kurt, you shall never be burried!!! Kurt: Oh thank you Hunter! Thank you! Hunter:...sucker... Kurt: WHAT!?!?!? Hunter: YOU QUESTION MY BOOKER T MOCKERY!!! YOU SHALL BE BURRIED!!! |
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02-20-2004, 10:31 PM
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#26 |
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TPWW's John McEnroe
Posts: 102
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Look at the attached files. Thanks to technological advances, we clearly see that Kurt Angle is played by a clean-shaven Goldberg.
TPWW's John McEnroe  "I am a lot like Martina Navratilova. I got into tennis for the chicks."  :foc: YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS!!! :foc:
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02-21-2004, 12:56 AM
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#27 |
Posts: 1,008
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This isn't a caption, but this is quite possibly the scariest Kurt Angle picture...ever. |
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02-21-2004, 03:32 AM
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#28 |
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Posts: 18,357
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Seeing... The Kurt wasn't as scary as seeing The Vince, but it was damn close. |
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02-21-2004, 01:37 PM
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#29 |
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The Caption Crippler
Posts: 8,855
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Gee, could that possibly be loopy's new avatar
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02-21-2004, 02:16 PM
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#30 |
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As over as Crystal Pepsi
Posts: 21,639
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God: Keeping talent down A good match A decent match ...What the hell is this... |
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02-21-2004, 04:53 PM
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#31 |
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Posts: 18,357
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Wait, unless I'm blind, I just realized he hasn't posted here this week.
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02-21-2004, 04:55 PM
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#32 |
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SEX APPEAL
Posts: 13,830
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Kurt tries out for the part of the Hob Goblin in Spider Man 3. |
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02-21-2004, 04:57 PM
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#33 |
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SEX APPEAL
Posts: 13,830
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...But Brock captured the role. |
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02-21-2004, 05:28 PM
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#34 | |
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FIT Challenge Slag People
Posts: 13,816
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Quote:
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02-21-2004, 05:31 PM
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#35 | |
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Guest
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Quote:
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02-21-2004, 11:20 PM
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#36 |
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Posts: 18,357
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Hah! I AM THE LONGEST CONTINUOUS CAPTIONEER ON THE FORUMS!!!!
Wait, why the **** am I even pretending to be proud of that?
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02-21-2004, 11:56 PM
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#37 |
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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Your the Ric Flair of Captions Cork.
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02-22-2004, 12:06 AM
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#38 |
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Formerly Ġohâń3k
Posts: 5,009
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god, these are so hilarious
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02-23-2004, 02:26 AM
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#39 | |
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Posts: 18,357
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Quote:
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02-23-2004, 07:35 PM
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#40 |
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FIT Challenge Slag People
Posts: 13,816
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Because I can't let Corky get too comfortable...
John Cena's gimmick was forever buried after the night he got the giggles. KURT: Belizeguatemalaelsalvadorhondurasnicaraguacostaricapanama...HOMO! JOHN: Wait...that wasn't in alpha-- KURT: No. Better. Geographic order! JOHN: Oh, no... Not another running gag... Brian Hebner's Igor impression came to a crushing halt after Kurt informed him that there actually was no "Igor" character in Mary Shelley's Frankenstein. Fucking spoilsport... Yes, kids, in honor of his upcoming match with Randy Orton in OVW, John Cena has been awarded his very own Telepathetic Helmet. Let's listen in... KURT: Hmm...MontgomereyJuneauTucsonLittleRo-- DANNY: Owieowieowieowieowie BRIAN: I *sob* can't believe I've been living a lie all these years... JOHN: Damn, whatever cold medicine loopydate's taking to make his captions so incoherent...I want some! JOHN: You can't see me! KURT: You're right. I'm just seeing a blurry white mess. BRIAN: But...he did have a hunchback assistant, right? JOHN: Oh, for Christ's sake... Why can't you be like your dad and just ring the bell? Kurt played a little air-jug. This was going to be the best jamboree EVER! Y'know what? I'm going to take a break before I embarass myself any further. |
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