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Old 02-09-2016, 06:06 PM   #41
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TNA's asylum match comes to mind.

On their big January 4 show, when they started competing with Monday Night Raw (Hogan's debut, etc.), the first match was an asylum match. The match ended as a no contest as the guy who was supposed to climb out of the cage physically couldn't do it, and the crowd began chanting "this is bullshit". It really was not a good start to a show they needed to do well.
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Old 02-09-2016, 06:09 PM   #42
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FMW's Exploding Ring matches always looked and were stupid.
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Old 02-09-2016, 07:16 PM   #43
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CSL View Post
TNA do seem to try and outdo themselves in terms of shitarsery when it comes to gimmick matches, King of the Mountain is up there in terms of regular ones, complete clusterfuckery, posted in another thread about the one I saw a week ago.



I think Feast or Fired is fine in theory, the whole point of the match is the risk/reward involved in terms of potentially getting fired, that's what they try to build the drama from, the basis for the promos etc, it's hardly a singles match where the winner gets fired (see: Winner Leaves Town in $5 Wrestling, which was wonderful) I just don't recall them ever executing it very well. Kennel from Hell & Punjabi Prison were obviously rotten. Those late WCW ones like the San Francisco 49ers match, the Judy Bagwell/Viagra on a Pole matches were ridiculous but hilarious, like everything else in WCW at the time. Plenty of exploding/crocodile/floating-in-a-pool/piranha/light-tube/bomb/glass/wrap the world in barbed wire and cover it in nail board matches in places like FMW, W*ING etc but I don't think they were ever supposed to be good and people were there specifically to see that stuff.
If there were briefcases (let's represent this with "n") and the number of competitors in the match was n+1, this would make more sense. The idea of a guy climbing, winning the match over guys who didn't win a damn thing, then losing job is fucking bonkers. It would add drama to the final "fall" of the match if two guys were fighting for not only a title shot, but their jobs.

You could also call it a "Musical Chairs" match.
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Old 02-09-2016, 07:19 PM   #44
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I hate fucking Strap Matches.
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Old 02-09-2016, 07:20 PM   #45
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The Steel Asylum matches suck too.
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Old 02-09-2016, 07:22 PM   #46
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That actually sounds pretty good. Don't really have a problem with Feast or Fired but Noids gestion does seem like it would be better.
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Old 02-09-2016, 08:24 PM   #47
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Droford View Post
I never liked Scaffold matches
They are highly dangerous for the talent involved and just stupid.

it looks cool on paper. not so much when you see them fumbling around on top of it.

Jim Cornette suffered a pretty bad knee injury when he fell off the damn thing.
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Old 02-09-2016, 08:38 PM   #48
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yeah but he got a pretty funny story out of it
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Old 02-09-2016, 08:38 PM   #49
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scaffold matches are/were always terrible tho
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Old 02-09-2016, 08:46 PM   #50
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gorgeous Dale Newstead View Post
Anything that isn't a cage match (you can include hell in a cell as a cage match), Death Match/Last Man Standing, I Quit match, Ladder Match or No Holds Barred match.

When you add any gimmick beyond that, it is just ridiculous. I know the dudleyz and hardys had a great tables match at the rumble in 2000 for instance, but the stipulation is fucking idiotic. A guy goes through the table and he loses? What does that do for anyone? It's almost completely up to chance.

A Casket match? Okay well let's just murder fuck kayfabe and make our product look as dumb as possible.

An inferno match? What the absolute hell is that? Why are pro wrestlers on the biggest stage lighting themselves on fire?

A buried alive match?... oh wait three of these four stips have to do with the Undertaker and they're fucking stupid.

When you book a gimmick match that hinders the bell-to-bell of a match in benefits nobody and makes no sense. How can these issues not just be solved at the start by a standard wrestling match and if the feud gets heated up, a classic gimmick match like I listed in the first paragraph? Nothing needs to be on a pole, nobody needs to be stuffed in a casket and people should only lose when they actually lose... not from falling through or off of something, or bleeding.

God wrestling is dumb sometimes.
wrestling is dumb all of the time, especially when you break it down that much. An inferno match, a casket match, they're no worse than throwing somebody at the ropes and that person actually bouncing back towards them or all of Mark Henry's matches lasting longer than 30 seconds because he didn't just pin somebody to the floor and use his strength and weight to hold them there. It doesn't matter how stupid the gimmick is as long as it's simple and entertaining.
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Old 02-09-2016, 10:14 PM   #51
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CSL View Post
wrestling is dumb all of the time, especially when you break it down that much. An inferno match, a casket match, they're no worse than throwing somebody at the ropes and that person actually bouncing back towards them or all of Mark Henry's matches lasting longer than 30 seconds because he didn't just pin somebody to the floor and use his strength and weight to hold them there. It doesn't matter how stupid the gimmick is as long as it's simple and entertaining.
How dare you challenge me?

But actually you're not wrong.

I just find those matches don't add anything. I find you can add plenty of silliness, entertainment value and campiness with the bare bones stuff I mentioned. I find the problem with wrestling is that "It's all been done", so it's hard to make stuff mean anything. I come from the belief that in wrasslin', less is more.

But in this case, I will have to agree, if it works it works. I just find for the most part, those cheesy shitty gimmick matches don't work, because they're too convoluted and often times ruin your suspension of disbelief.
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Old 02-09-2016, 10:19 PM   #52
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Casket and Buried Alive matches always seemed "cool". Definitely Undertaker made it work.

Inferno Match was indeed a tad silly and never lived up to the hype of someone getting set on fire.
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Old 02-09-2016, 11:00 PM   #53
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Gonna also agree on the strap/four corners matches being shit.
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Old 02-10-2016, 05:03 AM   #54
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King of the Mountain, just an unwatchable clusterfuck in my opinion.

Inferno match is up there for me as well, I could see it as some kind of once off but beyond that I just dont get it and tbh your never going to have a satisfying wow ending to it.
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Old 02-10-2016, 01:01 PM   #55
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what was the last good gimmick match?
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Old 02-10-2016, 01:22 PM   #56
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I liked the Raw and Smackdown Scramble they did a while back. That was pretty cool.
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Old 02-10-2016, 01:25 PM   #57
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refresh my memory, i probably fast forwarded through it. what was the concept?
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Old 02-10-2016, 01:37 PM   #58
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It was the match where Brian Kendrick won the World Title for like 5 minutes. Last person to hold the belt after 10 minutes won or something like that.
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Old 02-10-2016, 01:39 PM   #59
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wasn't that stoner supposed to be big time one day? like didnt internet geeks love him at a d bry level?
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Old 02-10-2016, 01:57 PM   #60
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In the eyes of the internet
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Old 02-10-2016, 01:59 PM   #61
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i was gonna say elimination chamber was the last good one if thats gimmicky
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Old 02-10-2016, 03:44 PM   #62
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I liked the TNA Dome-cage one where they had to escape through the 4-foot hole on the top.... alot less climactic than the typical "no way he escapes over the cage here" spot.....
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Old 02-10-2016, 03:46 PM   #63
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TNA's reverse battle royal idea is/was retarded beyond measure
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Old 02-10-2016, 03:49 PM   #64
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nicky Fives View Post
I liked the TNA Dome-cage one where they had to escape through the 4-foot hole on the top.... alot less climactic than the typical "no way he escapes over the cage here" spot.....

yeah they just went with "no way he escapes full stop"
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Old 02-10-2016, 03:51 PM   #65
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Crawling out of a sphincter.
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Old 02-11-2016, 07:56 PM   #66
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Scramble Matches fucked with my autism.
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Old 02-11-2016, 08:09 PM   #67
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jari View Post
Was it TNA or WCW that did an Electric Chair match?
I think TNA once did a tag team "electric cage" match at one of their PPV's...that seemed like a pretty dumb concept.

And while we're on the topic of horrible cage matches, there was the awful Barbed Wire Steel Cage match for JBL's WWE Championship @ No Way Out 2005.
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Old 02-12-2016, 12:34 AM   #68
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Didn't AWA have a turkey on a pole match?

Also, the piñata match.

Hell, ANTHING on a pole.
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Old 02-12-2016, 02:19 AM   #69
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Schlomey View Post
Pretty much agree with everything that has already been posted.

How about the King of the Road match?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r77868CA-DE
I bought this WCW PPV VHS at a Pawn shop and for the life of me could never forget this match... simply because WHAT THE FUCK?!!!?

I still cannot believe that Dustin Rhodes/Goldust still wrestles. For a guy who has been wrestling for so long, had A LOT of struggles with drug abuse/injuries to be involved with the biggest wrestling promotion over 20 years later is remarkable.
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Old 02-12-2016, 11:51 AM   #70
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When will this one be posted?
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Old 02-12-2016, 02:01 PM   #71
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already up
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Old 02-12-2016, 02:01 PM   #72
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http://squaredcirclegazette.podbean.com/
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Old 02-12-2016, 04:16 PM   #73
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Quote:
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This beats everything, ESWs AIDs infected needle match. There used to be a video of the match but I think it got pulled or lost its hosting
No mention of this match
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Old 02-12-2016, 04:46 PM   #74
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I think it was Sonjay Dutt who had a great story about being outside of the ring with nobody to brawl with during one of TNA's reverse battle royals. The ring was right there with nobody to stop him, but he wasn't one of the guys scheduled to win/qualify/whatever. So he just had to pretend that he couldn't get in the ring in any way, shape, or form.

Stupid, stupid fucking match.
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Old 02-12-2016, 09:33 PM   #75
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Big Vic View Post
No mention of this match
Good. Calling that a match is insulting to wrestling.
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Old 02-12-2016, 10:29 PM   #76
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Tank of Piranha Death Match. Not sure if it was really piranha. Still it looked really bad.
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Old 02-13-2016, 12:51 AM   #77
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honestly get sad when I hear about anything tna on your podcast. Thank god i never watched it
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Old 02-13-2016, 10:08 AM   #78
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Theo Dious View Post
Good. Calling that a match is insulting to wrestling.
That's the point of the podcast.
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Old 02-13-2016, 10:09 AM   #79
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Worse than I remember:

2007

In 2007, the tournament was altered to have the first stage consist of 16 competitors to begin and eight to advance to the second part, where the order of elimination will determine the sedings. All eight will advance to the second stage where the winner in the final will be the winner of the tournament, thus removing the third stage.
The first stage occurred at Bound for Glory on October 14. The Quarterfinals of Stage 2 occurred on TNA Impact! on October 18 and October 25. The Semifinals occurred on November 1. The Final occurred at Genesis on November 11.
  • Stage 2 - Single-elimination tournament

 Quarterfinals

Semifinals

Final (ladder match)










1 Eric Young



8 James Storm Pin


8 James Storm





5 Kaz Pin

5 Lance Hoyt 4:06



4 Kaz Pin


5 Kaz






Christian Cage Pin

3 Alex Shelley 1:26




6 Chris Sabin NCO


Christian Cage Pin




Chris Harris


7 Robert Roode 15:47



2 Junior Fatu Pin


    • The match between Sabin and Shelley ended in no-contest after Team 3D interfered. Neither qualified, and the opening was filled by Christian Cage by defeating Samoa Joe.
    • Chris Harris replaced Junior Fatu in the Semifinals.
    • The Final was originally held on November 8, with Cage pinning Kaz. Due to interference in the match, the original decision was thrown out and made into a ladder match at Genesis.
    • Kaz received a title shot on the November 15 edition of TNA Impact!.
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Old 02-14-2016, 06:09 AM   #80
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I want to thank everybody for the contributions, we got to read many of them on the show, which is now available at the following link:

http://squaredcirclegazette.podbean....onceptEver.mp3

Join us our show on The Worst Gimmick Match Concepts Ever, as the panel discuss every ridiculous stipulation under the sun, including Kennel From Hell, the Punjabi Prison, TNA's multiple horrific offerings, King Of The Road, Chamber of Horrors, Inferno Matches, Scaffold Matches, the San Francisco 49ers match, World War 3, the Anus Explosion Death Match (seriously) and many, many more, in search of the very worst one ever created. A tremendously fun show this week, check it out and let us know what you think!




Crazy Like A Fox - The Definitive Chronicle of Brian Pillman 20 Years Later
**Featuring interviews with members of the Pillman family, Dave Meltzer, Kim Wood, Raven, Jim Cornette, Mark Madden, Shane Douglas, Mark Coleman, Alex Marvez, Les Thatcher and many more close friends and colleagues**
Available on Amazon now:
http://amzn.to/2h93SxL
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