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Old 02-09-2016, 05:47 AM   #1
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The Worst Gimmick Match Concept Ever
So, for this week's podcast, we're going to evaluate different gimmick match concepts throughout history in search of the one that, whether it be through its convoluted nature, a propensity for generating absolutely awful matches, or being a concept that is utterly horrid on paper and in practice, is the absolute worst ever devised, and as always, we're looking for your opinions on the subject.

Which match concept did you dread the most or feel was utterly useless, and why do you feel it's the worst one ever put on a wrestling show? You can be as broad or obscure as you like in your nomination, and as always, the best contributions will be read on the show and you'll be credited accordingly.

So what's your pick?

EDIT - The podcast discussing The Worst Gimmick Match Concepts Ever, featuring a great many of your contributions is now online and available to listen to at the following link: http://squaredcirclegazette.podbean....onceptEver.mp3




Crazy Like A Fox - The Definitive Chronicle of Brian Pillman 20 Years Later
**Featuring interviews with members of the Pillman family, Dave Meltzer, Kim Wood, Raven, Jim Cornette, Mark Madden, Shane Douglas, Mark Coleman, Alex Marvez, Les Thatcher and many more close friends and colleagues**
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Old 02-09-2016, 06:38 AM   #2
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Punjabi prison match

Not only was the guy it was actually made for not in the thing but you've created a bamboo stick kennel from hell....I mean why?
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Old 02-09-2016, 06:44 AM   #3
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Buried alive matches were awful.

Although it was Takers Gimmick match he only won one of the five matches which just makes them stupid.
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Old 02-09-2016, 06:54 AM   #4
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Hell in a Kenell was great so no one say that. Puppy power! What did suck though was the Tuxedo match between The Fink and Harvey Whippleman. Even the Fink's sex appeal couldn't save this!
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Old 02-09-2016, 07:06 AM   #5
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fuckin judy bagwell on a pole lol.
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Old 02-09-2016, 07:18 AM   #6
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That's not PG JimmyMess.
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Old 02-09-2016, 07:24 AM   #7
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TNA has the trademark on this podcast.


Reverse Battle Royal !?!?!

King of the Mountain !?!?!

Electric Cage Match !?!?
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Old 02-09-2016, 09:39 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fragile X View Post
TNA has the trademark on this podcast.


Reverse Battle Royal !?!?!

King of the Mountain!??!

Electric Cage Match !?!?
I like King of the Mountian matches, Its the Dixie Land match that's retarded. Must exit a cage and then carry a ladder to the top of the ramp and retrieve the belt.
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Old 02-09-2016, 07:24 AM   #9
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Feast or Fired. The idea of a winner being fired is ass backwards.
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Old 02-09-2016, 07:27 AM   #10
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Quote:
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Feast or Fired. The idea of a winner being fired is ass backwards.

Especially when it had ACTUAL consequences...... definitely fucked up.


obligatory loltna
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Old 02-09-2016, 07:29 AM   #11
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Chairs Match is pretty dumb. Are chairs the only foreign objects that are legal? The idea of someone getting DQ'd in a Chairs Match is upsetting. You're better off doing No DQ and just using chairs creatively.
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Old 02-09-2016, 08:01 AM   #12
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Never liked the Stretcher Match. Seems really dumb to have to push your opponent across a line to win after you've "incapacitated" him.
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Old 02-09-2016, 08:12 AM   #13
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reverse battle royal
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Old 02-09-2016, 08:17 AM   #14
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Kennel From Hell match. I mean, it was such an embarrassing abomination of a match that WWE thankfully has never attempted another. Definitely one for the "What were they THINKING?!" files.
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Old 02-09-2016, 08:20 AM   #15
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This beats everything, ESWs AIDs infected needle match. There used to be a video of the match but I think it got pulled or lost its hosting

Quote:
Originally Posted by botchamania.com/esw-human-cockfighting/#
But it wasn’t just the combatants that set the unique tone, the matches themselves were… well… “insanely extreme” as well. WWF had coffin matches… ESW had “Box of AIDS-Infected Needles” Matches. And the one that got them the most industry “heat” wasn’t just because of the gore involved, but because this was back in a time before wrestlers gave interviews that let reporters in on the joke. At the notorious “Exposing The Business: Breaking Kayfabe” show they had a “Blade Rope” match, where the wrestlers (both of whom had already been rendered “HIV-Positive” from previous death matches) did their thing in a ring wrapped with razor blades that dangled from the ropes. The object wasn’t to use them to destroy the opponent but to get them and openly gig, or “blade” themselves. This was made all the more entertaining by Miss Von Erich, who kept trying to steal the weapons to cut her own wrists with them
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Old 02-12-2016, 04:16 PM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Big Vic View Post
This beats everything, ESWs AIDs infected needle match. There used to be a video of the match but I think it got pulled or lost its hosting
No mention of this match
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Old 02-12-2016, 09:33 PM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Big Vic View Post
No mention of this match
Good. Calling that a match is insulting to wrestling.
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Old 02-13-2016, 10:08 AM   #18
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Quote:
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Good. Calling that a match is insulting to wrestling.
That's the point of the podcast.
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Old 02-09-2016, 08:27 AM   #19
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HAHA, this thread is fucking gold.
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Old 02-09-2016, 08:43 AM   #20
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Punjabi Prison for sure.

I wonder how anyone could even see what the hell was going on inside of it.
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Old 02-09-2016, 08:48 AM   #21
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I was there, and it was very easy to see what was happening. More so than what was happening, the rules were more confusing to most as far as when doors opened/didn't open, etc.

That was at the Great Merican Bash where nearly every fecking match was changed because of elevated enzymes in the livers of nearly all the top names - BOBBY LASHLEY!
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Old 02-09-2016, 09:12 AM   #22
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Was it TNA or WCW that did an Electric Chair match?
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Old 02-09-2016, 09:16 AM   #23
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jari View Post
Was it TNA or WCW that did an Electric Chair match?
....Chamber of horrors?
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Old 02-11-2016, 08:09 PM   #24
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jari View Post
Was it TNA or WCW that did an Electric Chair match?
I think TNA once did a tag team "electric cage" match at one of their PPV's...that seemed like a pretty dumb concept.

And while we're on the topic of horrible cage matches, there was the awful Barbed Wire Steel Cage match for JBL's WWE Championship @ No Way Out 2005.
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Old 02-09-2016, 09:16 AM   #25
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Pretty much agree with everything that has already been posted.

How about the King of the Road match?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r77868CA-DE
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Old 02-12-2016, 02:19 AM   #26
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Schlomey View Post
Pretty much agree with everything that has already been posted.

How about the King of the Road match?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r77868CA-DE
I bought this WCW PPV VHS at a Pawn shop and for the life of me could never forget this match... simply because WHAT THE FUCK?!!!?

I still cannot believe that Dustin Rhodes/Goldust still wrestles. For a guy who has been wrestling for so long, had A LOT of struggles with drug abuse/injuries to be involved with the biggest wrestling promotion over 20 years later is remarkable.
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Old 02-09-2016, 10:03 AM   #27
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Why is that named after Dixie carter? Is that her specialty match?
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Old 02-09-2016, 10:18 AM   #28
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Why is that named after Dixie carter? Is that her specialty match?
I guess, Magnus won on e when he became TNA World Heavyweight Champion.
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Old 02-09-2016, 10:16 AM   #29
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TNA do seem to try and outdo themselves in terms of shitarsery when it comes to gimmick matches, King of the Mountain is up there in terms of regular ones, complete clusterfuckery, posted in another thread about the one I saw a week ago.

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-a KOTM match where Eric Young pins Jimmy Havoc outside the ring, which is missed by about 95% of the live crowd, as well as Jeremy Borash who is announcing the pinfalls to the crowd/audience as they happen. 5 minutes later, Eric Young climbs the ladder, hooks the title and wins the match. If you know how the clusterfuck that is KOTM works, you need to pin somebody in the match to be eligible to hang the title to win the match. So obviously most of the crowd had no fucking idea what was going on. Not to mention it looked like the referee forgot to let Big Damo out of the penalty box gimmick in time for the finishing sequence so Eric Young spends half an hour climbing the ladder alone and then with no suspense whatsoever just hangs the title as Big Damo shows up about a week later and just kind of falls over at the bottom of the ladder.
I think Feast or Fired is fine in theory, the whole point of the match is the risk/reward involved in terms of potentially getting fired, that's what they try to build the drama from, the basis for the promos etc, it's hardly a singles match where the winner gets fired (see: Winner Leaves Town in $5 Wrestling, which was wonderful) I just don't recall them ever executing it very well. Kennel from Hell & Punjabi Prison were obviously rotten. Those late WCW ones like the San Francisco 49ers match, the Judy Bagwell/Viagra on a Pole matches were ridiculous but hilarious, like everything else in WCW at the time. Plenty of exploding/crocodile/floating-in-a-pool/piranha/light-tube/bomb/glass/wrap the world in barbed wire and cover it in nail board matches in places like FMW, W*ING etc but I don't think they were ever supposed to be good and people were there specifically to see that stuff.
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Old 02-09-2016, 07:16 PM   #30
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CSL View Post
TNA do seem to try and outdo themselves in terms of shitarsery when it comes to gimmick matches, King of the Mountain is up there in terms of regular ones, complete clusterfuckery, posted in another thread about the one I saw a week ago.



I think Feast or Fired is fine in theory, the whole point of the match is the risk/reward involved in terms of potentially getting fired, that's what they try to build the drama from, the basis for the promos etc, it's hardly a singles match where the winner gets fired (see: Winner Leaves Town in $5 Wrestling, which was wonderful) I just don't recall them ever executing it very well. Kennel from Hell & Punjabi Prison were obviously rotten. Those late WCW ones like the San Francisco 49ers match, the Judy Bagwell/Viagra on a Pole matches were ridiculous but hilarious, like everything else in WCW at the time. Plenty of exploding/crocodile/floating-in-a-pool/piranha/light-tube/bomb/glass/wrap the world in barbed wire and cover it in nail board matches in places like FMW, W*ING etc but I don't think they were ever supposed to be good and people were there specifically to see that stuff.
If there were briefcases (let's represent this with "n") and the number of competitors in the match was n+1, this would make more sense. The idea of a guy climbing, winning the match over guys who didn't win a damn thing, then losing job is fucking bonkers. It would add drama to the final "fall" of the match if two guys were fighting for not only a title shot, but their jobs.

You could also call it a "Musical Chairs" match.
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Old 02-09-2016, 11:34 AM   #31
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Any strap or chain match where you touch all four corners.
Ambulance matches are pretty stupid
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Old 02-09-2016, 11:54 AM   #32
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Old 02-09-2016, 11:56 AM   #33
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I enjoy Boiler room brawls but the concept is pretty dumb, why not run out of the room ASAP.
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Old 02-09-2016, 12:06 PM   #34
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The Brawl for All concept was dumb.
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Old 02-09-2016, 12:49 PM   #35
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Lol I friggen loved Brawl for All.
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Old 02-09-2016, 12:58 PM   #36
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I liked it too, they should have done something with Bart Gunn after he won though even if it was just building him up just a bit so someone else could get over on him.
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Old 02-09-2016, 01:03 PM   #37
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Yea, they had him fight Butterbean. That lasted long.
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Old 02-09-2016, 02:49 PM   #38
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I never liked Scaffold matches
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Old 02-09-2016, 08:24 PM   #39
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Quote:
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I never liked Scaffold matches
They are highly dangerous for the talent involved and just stupid.

it looks cool on paper. not so much when you see them fumbling around on top of it.

Jim Cornette suffered a pretty bad knee injury when he fell off the damn thing.
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Old 02-09-2016, 02:59 PM   #40
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This Gem
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