The Plot to Destroy Jeff Hardy

**Favre4Ever** · 09-14-2009, 05:20 PM

August 28th, 2009

Vince McMahon: "Now Jeff, before you go out there for your "Loser Leaves Town" steel cage match with CM Punk, I want to give you one more offer to stay with the company."

Jeff Hardy: "I'm not staying. I have a shitty band that desperately needs my star power. I also need to promote an even shittier reality TV show."

Vince: "No house shows, no overseas tours. Just Smackdown! tapings and Pay Per Views. Nobody else gets this offer."

Jeff: "Sorry, but my mind is made up."

Vince: "You're breaking my balls, Jeff. You're sure?"

Jeff: "Yes. I'm sure." ::Music cues, Hardy turns and heads out the curtain::

Vince storms back to his office set, mumbling icily under his breath the whole way. "You don't say no to me, NOBODY says no to me, you can't QUIT, you're FIRED...."

September 9th

Vince stands in a shady alley, somewhere in Massachusetts. A full moon hangs in the night sky. Shuffling footsteps can be heard; after a few moments, a trio of dark robed figures appear from around the corner, hoods drawn over their faces.

Vince: "Is it done?"

???: "Yes, my Lord. We have planted the evidence exactly as you specified."

Vince: "And Chris Masters?"

???: "His wealth of drugs is so vast that he will not even notice the dent, sire."

Vince: "Good. Gooooooooood. Now, tomorrow morning, I want you to deliver the package."

???: "It will be done."

Vince: "Oh, and before you go, one more thing."

???: "Yes?"

Vince: "I want all of you to get on your knees and KISS MY ASS."

September 10th

The front door of the Moore County Sheriff's office burst's open, and a police officer rushes in with a document in his hand. He is perspiring heavily.

Cop: "Sir, you need to see this. I found it in an envelope on my front porch this morning."

Sheriff: "Well, hand it here."

They clear off a desk and unroll the envelope's contents, a large sheet of paper. On the sheet is a printed map of rural Moore County. An arrow points to a secluded residence, and next to the arrow is a picture of a man with rainbow hair and some retarded neck tattoos. Off to the side, in the top right hand corner written in large capital letters, is the word "DRUGS".

Sheriff: "Bulls-eye."

09-14-2009, 05:20 PM	#1
Favre4Ever Incoming Text Posts: 2,646	The Plot to Destroy Jeff Hardy August 28th, 2009 Vince McMahon: "Now Jeff, before you go out there for your "Loser Leaves Town" steel cage match with CM Punk, I want to give you one more offer to stay with the company." Jeff Hardy: "I'm not staying. I have a shitty band that desperately needs my star power. I also need to promote an even shittier reality TV show." Vince: "No house shows, no overseas tours. Just Smackdown! tapings and Pay Per Views. Nobody else gets this offer." Jeff: "Sorry, but my mind is made up." Vince: "You're breaking my balls, Jeff. You're sure?" Jeff: "Yes. I'm sure." ::Music cues, Hardy turns and heads out the curtain:: Vince storms back to his office set, mumbling icily under his breath the whole way. "You don't say no to me, NOBODY says no to me, you can't QUIT, you're FIRED...." September 9th Vince stands in a shady alley, somewhere in Massachusetts. A full moon hangs in the night sky. Shuffling footsteps can be heard; after a few moments, a trio of dark robed figures appear from around the corner, hoods drawn over their faces. Vince: "Is it done?" ???: "Yes, my Lord. We have planted the evidence exactly as you specified." Vince: "And Chris Masters?" ???: "His wealth of drugs is so vast that he will not even notice the dent, sire." Vince: "Good. Gooooooooood. Now, tomorrow morning, I want you to deliver the package." ???: "It will be done." Vince: "Oh, and before you go, one more thing." ???: "Yes?" Vince: "I want all of you to get on your knees and KISS MY ASS." September 10th The front door of the Moore County Sheriff's office burst's open, and a police officer rushes in with a document in his hand. He is perspiring heavily. Cop: "Sir, you need to see this. I found it in an envelope on my front porch this morning." Sheriff: "Well, hand it here." They clear off a desk and unroll the envelope's contents, a large sheet of paper. On the sheet is a printed map of rural Moore County. An arrow points to a secluded residence, and next to the arrow is a picture of a man with rainbow hair and some retarded neck tattoos. Off to the side, in the top right hand corner written in large capital letters, is the word "DRUGS". Sheriff: "Bulls-eye." Last edited by Favre4Ever; 09-14-2009 at 07:08 PM.