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[loopydate]

APRIL 26, 2004 - MONDAY NIGHT RAW

Kurt Angle's theme hits the speakers to kick off RAW, and the crowd rises to its feet, and out comes the new World Champion. Red, white, and blue balloons and confetti fall from the ceiling as he hits the ring and grabs a microphone. He's about a minute into a celebration promo when he's interrupted by the man he beat last night, Chris Jericho. Last night, Jericho had his first taste of the main event in months... and he loved it! And he knows that he's probably not the #1 contender at the moment, but until Angle gives him a rematch, he's going to make his life a living hell!

Coming off that 96% segment, we get yet another dud show. Yay! Ugh. Our opening contest pits Lance Storm against The Ministry's rookie monster Damien. Storm tries to use his speed and experience to his advantage, but Damien is just too strong, finishing him off with a Chokeslam for the win. After the match, Damien chases Storm up the ramp and lays him out with a massive clothesline.

Last week, Johnny Stamboli cost Booker T a match against his NBT teammate Chuck Palumbo, only to have Val Venis hit the ring to break things up. Tonight, the score should be settled in a tag-team match! The veterans work over Palumbo early, keeping him isolated from Stamboli. He finally manages to make the tag, and The Bull is a house of fire, pummeling Booker. Val gets the hot tag, but the tag experience of the Natural Born Thrillers is just too much as they put him away with the Kiss of Death. Afterwards, Val and Booker jump them, sending them to the floor. Well, apparently the score isn't settled.

The Ministry come to the ring next to a chorus of boos. Undertaker leads the way with his WWE Tag Team Title belt strapped around his waist, followed by his partner Big Show, Kane, and Damien. The four monsters take up most of the ring, and it's a truly imposing sight. Taker calls for the microphone. "Over the last three weeks, one man has been on a mission of acceptance. RAW is a dangerous place for a man to stand on his own, and he has wisely sought the assistance of others to make a name for himself. Lance Cade was rejected by La Resistance and the Natural Born Thrillers, and last night at Backlash, he attempted to ingratiate himself with The Ministry by attacking Rhyno during his match with my brother, Kane. Despite the fact that he wound up giving Rhyno the victory, I applaud Cade's initiative." He proceeds to call Cade out to the ring. Cade looks like he's in Heaven, that he's finally found a place he belongs. But, with one signal from Undertaker, The Ministry pounces, pummeling Cade into the mat. After a trio of chokeslams from his underlings, Undertaker hits a Tombstone and crosses his arms over his chest, leaving him resting in peace in the center of the ring. The crowd is all over The Ministry for taking their frustrations out on a relatively helpless Cade.

Rob Van Dam came up just short in his bid to win the United States Title from Sean O'Haire at Backlash last night, and he hopes to bounce back against O'Haire's Natural Born Thrillers stablemate Mark Jindrak. RVD controls a majority of the match, putting him away with his trademark flying kick off the top rope. After the match, O'Haire appears in the ring and hits the Prophecy, leaving RVD laying. Clearly this feud isn't over.

WWE Tag Team Champion Big Show is out next for a match against one-half of the former champions, Charlie Haas. These two put on a pretty disappointing match that the crowd is nonetheless pretty in to. In the end, Haas lays Show out with a big kick to the face before surprising him with the Haas of Pain! Show is right in the middle of the ring, and he just can't get to the ropes, so he... TAPS OUT! Haas pulls off a huge upset!

Backstage, Rhyno is warming up, and he cuts a brief promo about the fact that he's so close to the main event that he can taste it. He was held back by the Dangerous Alliance on SmackDown, and since he's come to RAW, he's had to deal with The Ministry. But now that it appears they have shifted their sights to Charlie Haas and Shelton Benjamin, he's finally, for the first time in almost a year, got a clear path to the title. And he's going to start that run tonight.

Rhyno comes out for his match against Chris Benoit, and it's a doozy. Great action from both men with a number of killer spots. The match ends with Rhyno setting up for a suplex, but Benoit catching him with an undetected low blow, then rolling him up with a small package for the cheap win. After the match, Edge hits the ring with a chair and lays his rival out.

Edge grabs the microphone and issues Benoit a challenge for a rematch at Judgment Day. A woozy, yet angry Benoit agrees to it.

In a follow-up to our earlier Haas/Show match, it's Shelton Benjamin vs. Undertaker! Decidedly average match that gets a huge crowd reaction (and a low rating because of the stupid dud show) ends with the distracted referee missing Kane accidentally clothesline his own brother, allowing Shelton to lay UT out with a Superkick for the win! After the match, the Brothers of Destruction go after Benjamin until Charlie Haas hits the ring, and the World's Greatest Tag Team chase off the Brothers of Destruction.

Our main event pits the two biggest stars on RAW - World Champion Kurt Angle and United States Champion Sean O'Haire - against each other in a one-on-one contest. Good back-and-forth match ends when Angle prepares to clamp on the Angle Lock, but is blindsided by Chris Jericho! Jericho clamps on the Walls of Jericho as the referee calls for the bell. Rob Van Dam hits the ring to chase off O'Haire, and Angle gets the advantage on Jericho, and the two stand together in the ring as their rivals run off as RAW goes off the air.

[loopydate]

MAY 3, 2004 - MONDAY NIGHT RAW

May of 2004 kicks off with... yet another dud show from the fine people at RAW. Dammit. In just under two weeks, WWE returns to pay-per-view with Judgment Day, and after the blockbuster announcement by Vince McMahon, we know that we are just two weeks away from the start of King of the Ring!

One of the favorites in that tournament has to be the red-hot Rhyno, and tonight he takes on La Resistance's Rene Dupree. Rhyno dominates almost from the opening bell, picking up the dominant win with the GOOOOOOORE!

The WWE fans are in for a treat next as Terri Runnels makes her return to RAW. The blonde bombshell is looking especially... sort of funny-looking, actually. Never really thought she was that hot. Anyway, she's there to announce her newest clients, a tag team that's looking to put aside their recent individual struggles in a quest to become WWE Tag Team Champions. Ladies and gentlemen, The Playboys - Val Venis and Lance Cade!

The Playboys get their first action next in a six-man match, teaming with the equally down-on-his-luck Booker T to take on Natural Born Thrillers Chuck Palumbo, Johnny Stamboli, and Mark Jindrak. The babyfaces get off to a hot start, isolating Johnny The Bull with quick tags and lots of high-impact offense. Once Chuck Palumbo comes in, though, momentum quickly shifts to the NBT side of the ring. Palumbo pummels Cade, then he and Jindrak double-team him a bit. We get a double-hot-tag spot with Stamboli and Booker hitting the ring at the same time, and Stamboli picks up the win for NBT with his Mamaluke DDT.

Last week, Chris Benoit picked up a win over Rhyno, only to get blindsided by Edge after the match. We now know that they will face off once more at Judgment Day. Benoit has a tune-up match tonight against the massive A-Train. Train uses his power early, but Benoit, with the use of evasive maneuvers, takes control and throws Train around the ring with myriad suplexes. Benoit hits Train with an incredible Emerald Fusion, and Train never stood a chance as he taps out to the Crippler Crossface. After the match, Edge once again hits the ring and lays Benoit out with the Edgecutioner! These two aren't waiting until Judgment Day!

Sean O'Haire is backstage, and he's there to issue a challenge. He thought he had put Rob Van Dam behind him. He issued one final statement last week on RAW, but then RVD had to go and stick his nose in O'Haire's business again after the main event. This is going to end, and it's not going to end with tonight's tag-team main event. O'Haire wants RVD at Judgment Day, and he's willing to put the United States Title on the line again to do it!

The Women's Division is on display next in eight-Diva tag-team action. Trish Stratus leads her team of Lita, Victoria, and her best friend Mickie James against Gail Kim, Jazz, Molly Holly, and the returning Shaniqua! Ugh. This dud show is pissing me off. Anyway, Mickie picks up the win with a tornado DDT on Shaniqua.

Edge clearly has Chris Benoit on his mind tonight, but he has to focus his energies next as he takes on The Ministry's undefeated rookie monster Damien! Edge looks to be on the verge of handing Damien his first loss, but during a bit of confusion, Chris Benoit nails Edge with a chair, allowing Damien to snatch him up and hit a Chokeslam for the win! After the match, Benoit ties Edge up in the ropes. The referee tries to hold him back, but it's too late, as Benoit pulls off his version of the Chairshot Heard 'Round The World, leaving an unconscious Edge slumped in the ropes. Benoit has completely snapped, and finally the officials and agents manage to get him out of the ring.

Last week, the World's Greatest Tag Team got into it once again with their rivals, the WWE Tag Team Champions Big Show and Undertaker. Tonight, they take on Undertaker and his half-brother Kane. If they can beat the re-united Brothers Of Destruction, they earn a title match against Show and Taker at Judgment Day! This match turns out to be not much more than a set-up. WGTT control most of the match, but they leave themselves open for Big Show to hit Shelton Benjamin with a chair, costing the Brothers the match. They clearly just wanted to soften up their rivals before Judgment Day!

Eric Bischoff appears on the TitanTron and makes the match official. It's Undertaker and Show defending the WWE Tag Team Titles against the team they defeated at Backlash, the World's Greatest Tag Team!

Time now for our main event, as the World Champion Kurt Angle teams with Rob Van Dam against Angle's new rival Chris Jericho and the United States Champion Sean O'Haire! Good match that the crowd is into, even though Angle isn't really into it, and it's a dud show. Even still, it gets a decent rating. In the end, Jericho rolls up Angle with a handful of tights for the cheap win. He's pinned the World Champion! After the match, Angle and RVD take their rivals down.

Angle grabs the microphone and issues a challenge to Jericho. Jericho's right. He's not supposed to be the #1 contender, but if he's going to keep being a pain in Angle's ass, Angle's going to return the favor by being a pain in Jericho's... freakin' ankle! Oh, it's true! It's damn true!

[loopydate]

MAY 10, 2004 - MONDAY NIGHT RAW

Okay, so something fucked up on my laptop and I lost the first several segments worth of stuff I'd written up. Molly beat Lita with the Molly Go Round.

Kane beat Lance Storm with a Chokeslam.

Trish and Mickie had a random backstage hanging out thing to boost ratings with T&A.

Up next is a match between The Ministry's undefeated rookie monster Damien and a man who was once known in ECW as the... undefeated... rookie monster, Rhyno. These two tear the house down and the crowd eats it up. They are absolutely on the verge of superstardom. Damien continues his winning streak with his trademark DDT, but after the match, Rhyno gets revenge and sends him to the floor.

And my stupid laptop fucked up again. Chris Benoit beat Charlie Haas thanks to help from Big Show. After the match, Edge hits the ring to even the odds.

It's unclear what the next segment is until... GLASS SHATTERS! HOLY SHIT! STONE COLD! STONE COLD! STONE COLD! BAH GAWD, MAH CHAIR'S STICKY, KING! Austin comes out to address his hometown faithful. It sounds like he's about to become a more permanent addition to the RAW roster. Which means at least one segment a week that TPWW.net poster loopydate gets to see what's happening on other channels.

Up next is a hell of a disappointing match between Rob Van Dam and Big Show. Sean O'Haire accidentally takes Show out, allowing RVD to hit the Five-Star Frogsplash for the win. After the match, Shelton Benjamin hits the ring to make the save.

Fortunately, the match that occurs right after, pitting Benjamin against O'Haire, is amazing. Tons of back-and-forth action, with both guys pulling out all the stops. The night o' interference continues, as Undertaker hits the ring to hang Shelton out across the top rope. RVD makes the save, and the feuds continue. It's almost like I'm trying to wrap all this stuff up over the next few shows to build to new feuds or something.

"I'm ba-ack!" Eric Bischoff hits the ring. He asks for a microphone. "For the better part of a decade, Vince McMahon and I went head-to-head. He was leading this very company, while I was running World Championship Wrestling. Three years ago, Vince put me under. Then he brought me in, and he thought he'd won the war. But when Vince announced that he was taking over as acting General Manager of SmackDown! last week, he unwittingly restarted the war! Vince, you may have my old secret weapon - the cruiserweight division - dominating your shows, but I've learned some things since we last tangled, Vince. And you'd better believe that it's not going to be long before RAW runs SmackDown! into the ground in the ratings, and you'll have no choice but to step down as the head of World Wrestling Entertainment and give me the victory I so rightly deserve! And when it's all said and done, I'm slapping a giant WCW logo on the front of Titan Towers!"

Number-one contender for the World Title Chris Jericho takes on Edge in our next contest. You can pretty much imagine what happens at the end of this one (if you've been paying attention through the rest of the show), as Chris Benoit hits Edge with a chair, allowing Jericho to pick up the win. After the match, Kurt Angle makes the save and drives off Jericho.

And, thanks to Undertaker's crappy work ethic and Kurt Angle's not giving a damn, their main event match is a dud. Angle wins it by DQ after Chris Jericho interferes, and Charlie Haas makes the save. Ugh.

[loopydate]

MAY 17, 2004 - MONDAY NIGHT RAW

The 2004 King of the Ring tournament kicks off tonight! Our first contest pits the World's Greatest Tag Team's Shelton Benjamin against La Resistance's Sylvan Grenier. GOD FUCKING DAMNED DUD SHOW! Shelton wins it with a Superkick.

Mickie James beats Shaniqua with a DDT.

The Natural Born Thrillers come to the ring next and cut a promo. Mostly it's self-promotion, but O'Haire's attention inevitably returns to his ongoing feud with Rob Van Dam.

The other three NBTs have a six-man tag match next against Rikishi and ECW alumni Lance Storm and Tommy Dreamer. Because I'm fucking pissed about the dud show, I'll just say that Palumbo pins Rikishi with the Jungle Kick.

Molly Holly beat Victoria with the Molly Go Round.

Eric Bischoff comes out to the ring next. He jaws about Vince McMahon a little, but mostly he's out there to say that the two Divas matches we've seen tonight were the first two quarterfinal matches in his latest brainchild... the Queen of the Ring tournament! The tournament will unfold in much the same manner as King of the Ring, with the same deal. The winner of the tournament gets a Women's Title shot any time she wants within a year.

Sean O'Haire beats Val Venis with the Prophecy to advance in King of the Ring.

Damien beats A-Train with a Chokeslam to advance to round two.

Damien grabs a microphone and cuts his first promo. It's pretty good, even if it is just self-promotion. This guy's going to be huge.

Up next is a clusterfuck eight-man tag match involving next week's KotR participants. It's Charlie Haas, Edge, Rhyno, and Rob Van Dam against Chris Benoit, Chris Jericho, Rene Dupree, and Undertaker. Jericho gets Rhyno to tap out to the Walls of Jericho to claim the victory.

Kurt Angle pinned Big Show with the Angle Slam to advance in King of the Ring.

[loopydate]

MAY 24, 2004 - MONDAY NIGHT RAW

Tonight, both King of the Ring and Queen of the Ring continue with first-round matchups, plus a big tag-team main event pitting the four RAW superstars who advanced last week into next week's second round. The night kicks off with a QotR quarterfinal match pitting Lita against Jazz. Not a pretty match, and Jazz picks up the win with the STF to advance to next week's semis.

Backstage, Terri Runnels is trying to hype up The Playboys. They've been left off RAW a couple of times since their formation, but if they remain patient, they'll seize the opportunity.

King of the Ring continues next as Edge takes on La Resistance's Rene Dupree. Dupree once again shows that he's on the cusp of breaking out as a singles competitor, but Edge's experience is just too much, and he picks up the win with the Edgecution.

Mickie James cuts a good promo next about next week's QotR semifinal match against Molly Holly. That should be a hot match.

The last spot in the QotR semifinals is on the line next as Gail Kim takes on Women's Champion Trish Stratus. Decent match that the crowd gets way into. Both Divas get in a fair amount of offense until Trish takes Gail out with the Stratusphere to advance.

Chris Benoit attempts to cut a promo about his ongoing feud with Edge, but he's never been known as a brilliant stick man.

King of the Ring continues next with the recurring #1 contenders for the RAW singles titles, Rob Van Dam and Chris Jericho going head-to-head. These two put on a tremendous match that will hopefully re-establish RVD as an upper carder. Jericho picks up a cheap win as Sean O'Haire hits the ring and lays RVD out with a chair behind the ref's back. After the match, Kurt Angle hits the ring to help out RVD and chase off his rival Jericho.

Our next KotR match pits Chris Benoit against the World's Greatest Tag Team's Charlie Haas. Haas' partner Shelton Benjamin has already advanced to round two. Unfortunately, he's the only member of the team to do so, as Benoit puts Haas away with the Swandive Headbutt. After the match, Edge takes out Benoit with the Edgecution, clearly taking offense to Benoit's verbal attacks.

The Ministry cut an ominous promo about Rhyno. He faces Undertaker in a first-round match next, and Undertaker is still mad blah blah blah WrestleMania blah blah blah.

They put on a pretty lackluster match that Rhyno wins with the GOOOOOOORE to advance to round two.

And now for our main event. Next week, World Champion Kurt Angle will take on the undefeated rookie monster Damien, while Shelton Benjamin will face the United States Champion Sean O'Haire. Tonight, these two matches get previewed in a tag-team match! In the end, Chris Jericho gets his revenge from earlier, hopping up onto the apron and hittng Angle with a chair, allowing O'Haire to cover him for the win. After the match, RVD makes the save to turn the advantage back to the babyfaces as RAw goes off the air.

[loopydate]

MAY 31, 2004 - MONDAY NIGHT RAW

Tonight, the King of the Ring tournament rolls on as two spots in the quarterfinals are determined, plus, the semifinals of the Queen of the Ring tournament!

We kick things off with six-man tag action pitting six of RAW's least popular wrestlers. It's La Resistance's Rene Dupree, Rob Conway, and Sylvan Grenier against Natural Born Thrillers Chuck Palumbo, Johnny Stamboli, and Mark Jindrak! Chuck Palumbo and Rene Dupree carry most of the in-ring action while Johnny Stamboli and Rob Conway spend most of the action on the apron. Jindrak picks up the win for his team by hitting Dupree with Splash Mountain in the corner.

Booker T comes to the ring, prepared to cut a promo. The camera zooms in tight as he raises the mic to his lips. "I... quit." Down goes the mic, and away goes Booker. Wtf?

Now it's time for midcard mania in the form of a ten-man battle royal! Playboy Lance Cade is the first victim, taken out by Luther Reigns. Rikishi takes out Tommy Dreamer, while Cade's partner Val Venis eliminates Lance Storm, only to get dumped by A-Train. Train continues to roll by taking out Kane. William Regal eliminates Rikishi next. Reigns is the next one out, courtesy of Edge. The match turns into a lengthy triple-threat between Train, Edge, and Regal, with lots of action from all three. Regal winds up taking out Train, only to fall victim to an Edgecution, and Edge wins the match.

Queen of the Ring continues next with our first semifinal match, pitting Women's Champion Trish Stratus against Jazz. This one goes back and forth several times, and Jazz definitely looks like a legit threat, but in the end the champ is just too good, and she picks up the win with Stratusfaction.

Chris Benoit cuts a promo next, talking about his ongoing feud with Edge. Next week, both men have quarterfinal KotR matches. He knows he's going to beat Rhyno and, although he's rooting for a match with his friend Chris Jericho, he'd also love to finally bury Edge once and for all.

We already know that Trish Stratus will be participating in next week's Queen of the Ring finals, but her opponent will be determined in our next match. It's Mickie James versus Molly Holly. These two put on one of the better matches of the year thus far, and I don't just mean Divas matches. Mickie picks up the win with a tornado DDT, but both women look like a million bucks doing it.

King of the Ring continues next as the World Champion Kurt Angle takes on The Ministry's undefeated rookie monster Damien. The crowd was way into this one, even though Angle continues to phone it in. Damien, however, continues to look like a megastar of the future, as he goes step-for-step with the Olympic gold medalist. During a bit of confusion, Chris Jericho hits the ring and locks Angle in the Walls of Jericho! He slides from the ring, and Damien picks up the pieces, pinning the World Champion to advance! After the match, an enraged Angle drives both rivals from the ring and stands tall.

Angle grabs a microphone. Basically, the promo consists of him being in disbelief that Jericho still can't take a hint. How many times does Angle have to beat him before he finally gets the hint that he just doesn't have what it takes? His days as a credible championship contender are behind him. Let go!

Up next is a triple-threat match for the WWE Tag Team Titles. The Ministry's Undertaker and Big Show defend against "Canadian Violence" Benoit and Jericho and the duo of Charlie Haas and Rhyno. The champions isolate Rhyno early, until Rhyno tags in Haas. Haas and Undertaker carry most of the match, with Haas being the only participant to actually share the ring with all four opponents. In a bit of a surprise, Jericho manages to get Haas locked in the Walls of Jericho, and we have new champions! Canadian Violence are the new WWE Tag Team Champions!

Our main event tonight is another King of the Ring second round match as United States Champion Sean O'Haire takes on the World's Greatest Tag Team's Shelton Benjamin. These two put on a tremendous contest that sees reversals and high spots aplenty. At one point, Benjamin lays O'Haire out with a Death Valley Driver. Amidst some confusion, Rob Van Dam hits the ring and lands a Five-Star Frogsplash on O'Haire! The referee turns around just in time to see Benjamin cover O'Haire to pick up the win! Shelton Benjamin is going to the quarterfinals! After the match, RVD continues to pummel O'Haire with a steel chair, finishing him off with a Van Daminator!

As RVD walks off, a bloodied O'Haire grabs the ringside microphone and issues a challenge. Next week on RAW, they are going to finally end things once and for all. And if RVD wants to get hardcore, that's fine with him. Next week, I'll put the United States Title on the line for one last time against you in a Hardcore Match!

Next week on RAW, King of the Ring continues as new WWE Tag Team Champions Chris Benoit and Chris Jericho face off against Rhyno and Edge, respectively! Will it be partner versus partner in the quarterfinals? Plus, Trish Stratus takes on her best friend Mickie James in the finals of the Queen of the Ring tournament! All that, plus a Hardcore Match for the United States Title with Sean O'Haire defending for the last time against Rob Van Dam! You don't want to miss RAW next week!