RAW Captions [4-26-2004]

**El Santo** · 04-28-2004, 03:20 AM

Ref: "Oh, God... what do I go for, tits or ass? Aw hell, I'll have them both!!!!"

Lita was relieved that Steven Richards ad saved her from a sex-hungry Kane, but, at the same time, she gasped in horror at the horrible price he had to pay.

Coach: "You know, Tajiri, I've always had a thing for Asians."

Impaired Judgment: another side effect of hunger. Grab a snickers.

In a heartwarming moment, both Tajiri and HHH broke kayfabe to give props to the Fonz.

HHH: "You march on Isengard, dammit, or all Middle Earth is lost!!"

Rhyno: "Damn you, Elmers! Where are you in my time of need?"

The tech grows frustrated as Eugene proves to be his better at Rock-Paper-Scissors.

Benoit: "Unforgettable... that's what you are... take it away, Shawn..."
HBK: "Ummmm...."

Christian knew that something was mentally screwed up with Brian Christopher when he started sucking his thumb midmatch.

GMS: "Oh my God! I came back to the WWE, and I have no wrestling skills whatsoever!" Pounds head. "Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid!"

Things got horribly surreal when "The Magician" Tyson Tomko pulled Trish Stratus out of Jericho's ass.

Christian, ever a champion of decency, saves the world from another wardrobe malfunction.

The brutality of HHH's attack reached a new level when Tajiri's left forearm snapped clean off!

Tajiri: "Gah!!! You're crushing my neck with your hee----!"
HHH: "Shhhh! Godammit, not in public! Not while Ric's around!"
Tajiri: "Oh, um, you're crushing my neck with your bad guy?"

Kane just loved his new Matt Hardy doll!

Kane was just not amused with the new "Zombie Lita" gimmick.

Kane: "For the love of God, Lita, how many times have I told you... if you don't floss, you're more susceptible to the gum disease known as gingivitis!"

JR: "And on the ring ropes, ladies and gentlemen, is the tightest ass I have ever seen! ... And Stacy's there, too."

Stacy: Ow, wow! Andy Rooney! I love you on 60 Minutes!"

Harley tried to stay in a good mood, but he never was a fan of hiphop, and he was damn sure that Randy wasn't the one with the rap gimmick.

Edge discovered the Figure Four Leglock's true secret: it's user had the power to go Super Saiyan!

The Ref was disappointed that nobody wanted to play "Where is thumbman?"

The Ref was also chagrined when nobody wanted a piggyback ride.

Edge: "Aw, geez, I didn't know that anyone left an elephant rug in the middle of the ring."
Ric: "Jackass."

Benoit's theory that "HBK" was a evil doppleganger proved to be true when Shawn's face melted away.

04-28-2004, 03:20 AM	#4
El Santo One Man Horror Show Posts: 1,046	Ref: "Oh, God... what do I go for, tits or ass? Aw hell, I'll have them both!!!!" Lita was relieved that Steven Richards ad saved her from a sex-hungry Kane, but, at the same time, she gasped in horror at the horrible price he had to pay. Coach: "You know, Tajiri, I've always had a thing for Asians." Impaired Judgment: another side effect of hunger. Grab a snickers. In a heartwarming moment, both Tajiri and HHH broke kayfabe to give props to the Fonz. HHH: "You march on Isengard, dammit, or all Middle Earth is lost!!" Rhyno: "Damn you, Elmers! Where are you in my time of need?" The tech grows frustrated as Eugene proves to be his better at Rock-Paper-Scissors. Benoit: "Unforgettable... that's what you are... take it away, Shawn..." HBK: "Ummmm...." Christian knew that something was mentally screwed up with Brian Christopher when he started sucking his thumb midmatch. GMS: "Oh my God! I came back to the WWE, and I have no wrestling skills whatsoever!" Pounds head. "Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid!" Things got horribly surreal when "The Magician" Tyson Tomko pulled Trish Stratus out of Jericho's ass. Christian, ever a champion of decency, saves the world from another wardrobe malfunction. The brutality of HHH's attack reached a new level when Tajiri's left forearm snapped clean off! Tajiri: "Gah!!! You're crushing my neck with your hee----!" HHH: "Shhhh! Godammit, not in public! Not while Ric's around!" Tajiri: "Oh, um, you're crushing my neck with your bad guy?" Kane just loved his new Matt Hardy doll! Kane was just not amused with the new "Zombie Lita" gimmick. Kane: "For the love of God, Lita, how many times have I told you... if you don't floss, you're more susceptible to the gum disease known as gingivitis!" JR: "And on the ring ropes, ladies and gentlemen, is the tightest ass I have ever seen! ... And Stacy's there, too." Stacy: Ow, wow! Andy Rooney! I love you on 60 Minutes!" Harley tried to stay in a good mood, but he never was a fan of hiphop, and he was damn sure that Randy wasn't the one with the rap gimmick. Edge discovered the Figure Four Leglock's true secret: it's user had the power to go Super Saiyan! The Ref was disappointed that nobody wanted to play "Where is thumbman?" The Ref was also chagrined when nobody wanted a piggyback ride. Edge: "Aw, geez, I didn't know that anyone left an elephant rug in the middle of the ring." Ric: "Jackass." Benoit's theory that "HBK" was a evil doppleganger proved to be true when Shawn's face melted away. Last edited by El Santo; 04-28-2004 at 04:24 AM.