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Old 06-09-2011, 01:36 PM   #81
Volare
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You need secret service....and I'm ex military....
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Old 06-09-2011, 02:36 PM   #82
The Naitch
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Quote:
The United States Ambassador to the United Nations is VSG, the leader of the UPB delegation, the UPB Mission to the United Nations. The position is more formally known as the "Permanent Representative of the United Paper Bags of TPWW to the United Nations, with the rank and status of Ambassador Extraordinary and Plenipotentiary, and Representative of the United Paper Bags of TPWW in the Security Council of the United Nations"; it is also known as the UPB Permanent Representative, or "Perm Rep", to the United Nations.

The UPB Permanent Representative, currently Juan's mother (who is currently incarcerated), is charged with representing the UPB on the U.N. Security Council and during almost all plenary meetings of the General Assembly, except in the rare situation in which a more senior officer of the United Paper Bags (such as the UPB Secretary of State or the President of the United Paper Bags aka FIRST BLACK PREZ Nervous Ferret) is present. Like all United Paper Bags ambassadors, he or she must be nominated by the UPB President and confirmed by the Senate.

Many prominent UPB politicians and diplomats have held the post like YOUNG GOLDIE setting up shop ALONGSIDE Too $hort with orange juice bottle FULL OF GIN, including Big O and his Jersey Shore BRETHEREN.

It was a cabinet-level position under the Anybody Thrilla Administration and is under the Nervous Ferret Administration as well. It was not a cabinet-level position under the Summer of Sixx Administration (from 2001 to 2009).

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Old 06-09-2011, 02:41 PM   #83
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Quote:
Volare is The Head of the Secret Service, a United Paper Bags federal law enforcement agency that is part of the United Paper Bags Department of Homeland Security.[2] The sworn members are divided among the Special Agents and the Uniformed Division. Until March 1, 2003, the Service was part of the United Paper Bags Department of the Treasury.[3]

The UPB Secret Service has two distinct areas of responsibility:

-Treasury roles, covering missions such as prevention and investigation of counterfeiting of UPB currency and UPB treasury bonds notes and investigation of major fraud.[4]

-Protective roles, ensuring the safety of current and former national leaders and their families, such as the President NERVOUS FERRET, past Presidents, Vice President THE NAITCH, presidential candidates, foreign embassies (per an agreement with the UPB State Department's Bureau of Diplomatic Security (DS) Office of Foreign Missions (OFM)), etc.[5]

-The Secret Service's initial responsibility was to investigate crimes related to the Treasury and then evolved into the United Paper Bags' first domestic intelligence and counterintelligence agency. Many of the agency's missions were later taken over by subsequent agencies such as the Forum Bureau of Investigation (FBI), Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives (ATF), Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE), and Internal Revenue Service (IRS).

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Old 06-09-2011, 02:51 PM   #84
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The President of the United Paper Bags of TPWW, NERVOUS FERRET (aka First BLACK Prez aka The Meanest Poster), is the head of state and head of government of the UPB. The president leads the executive branch of the federal government and is the commander-in-chief of the UPB Armed Forces.

Article II of the UPB Constitution vests the executive power of the UPB in the president and charges him with the execution of federal law, alongside the responsibility of appointing federal executive, diplomatic, regulatory, and judicial officers, and concluding treaties with foreign powers, with the advice and consent of the Senate. The president is further empowered to grant federal pardons and reprieves, and to convene and adjourn either or both houses of Congress under extraordinary circumstances.[3] Since the founding of the United Paper Bags, the power of the president and the federal government have grown substantially[4] and each modern president, despite possessing no formal legislative powers beyond signing or vetoing congressionally passed bills, is largely responsible for dictating the legislative agenda of his party and the foreign and domestic policy of the United Paper Bags.[5] The president is frequently described as the most powerful person in the world. BELIE' DAT PLAYA. He be running shit[6][7][8][9][10][11]

The president is indirectly elected by the people through the Electoral College to a four-year term, and is one of only two nationally elected federal officers, the other being the Vice President THE NAITCH (yup) of the United Paper Bags .[12] The Twenty-second Amendment, adopted in THE MONTH OF MUGEK in 2010, prohibits anyone from ever being elected to the presidency for a third full term. It also prohibits a person from being elected to the presidency more than once if that person previously had served as President, or Acting President, for more than two years of another person's term as President. In all, 43 individuals have served 55 four-year terms.[13] On June 9, 2011 in THE SUMMER OF SIXX, Nervous Ferret aka FIRST BLACK PREZ aka The MEANEST Poster, became the UPB's current president, based on the FIRST COME FIRST SERVE approach
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Old 06-09-2011, 04:35 PM   #85
Emperor Smeat
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No actual Secretary of Paper Bags position?

You need someone to make and supply the bags like how Ted Dibiase Jr was Rhodes Secretary of Paper Bags.
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Old 06-09-2011, 04:58 PM   #86
Supreme Olajuwon
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where's my avatar's bag? hmm? cause I don't see one
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Old 06-09-2011, 05:21 PM   #87
Nervous Ferret
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I had to remove DAMN iNATOR from his cabinet position after he tried to double cross me in a thread, AND THEN negatively rated me twice. We can't have descension.
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Old 06-09-2011, 05:22 PM   #88
Nervous Ferret
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Plus he sent me a pic of his junk. Who wants to see that, gross
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Old 06-09-2011, 05:56 PM   #89
Vastardikai
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Seeing as how I'm from GA, and was in FFA in high school (as well as being the first multi-bagged Avatar), I want to be Sec of Agriculture.
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Old 06-09-2011, 06:03 PM   #90
DAMN iNATOR
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nervous Ferret View Post
I had to remove DAMN iNATOR from his cabinet position after he tried to double cross me in a thread, AND THEN negatively rated me twice. We can't have descension.
It's "dissention". Get a dictionary. This is why you can't have a reliable UN Ambassador of the UPB like me anymore because you criticize me and spread your hateful lies to all who will listen and take your side.

Ya know what, fuck quitting! I'm not quitting at all, nor will I allow the crooked PoTUPB take my position away. NerF, you wanted a fight you got one, you son of a bitch! I'm demanding that you allow me to stay on as UPB U.N. Ambassador or I shall have no other recourse than to petition the U.N. to entirely and completely remove UPB as a member...for good.

Don't test me.
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Old 06-09-2011, 06:06 PM   #91
Lock Jaw
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Pretty sure DAMN iNATOR should have had diplomatic immunity. Can neg rep/double-cross whoever he wants, and get away with it.
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Old 06-09-2011, 06:17 PM   #92
Nervous Ferret
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Hello no not on this black prez's watch. To the birds I say
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Old 06-09-2011, 06:25 PM   #93
The Naitch
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Quote:
The United Paper Bags Secretary of Agriculture is the head of the United Paper Bags Department of Agriculture. The current secretary is Vastardikai, who was confirmed by the UPB Senate on 9 June 2011. [1] The position carries similar responsibilities to those of agriculture ministers in other governments. He's basically a freakin' gardener.

The department includes several organizations. The 297,000 mi2 (770,000 km²) of national forests, grasslands and government funded grow-operations of HIGH GRADE marijuana, spearheaded by the VASTARDIZED ALLIANCE COMMITTEE and managed by the United Paper Bags Forest Service.[2] The safety of food produced that are produced in the UPB and sold here is ensured by the UPB Food Safety and Inspection Service.[3] Gotta keep shit sanitary yo. The Food Stamp Program works to provide food to low-income people like SuperSlim, Savior and ilt_undertaker.[4] They also made it mandatory that Mexicans wash their hands before preparing food services. If caught not washing their hands, they will be jailed and/or deported. Advice for farmers and gardeners is provided by the United Paper Bags Cooperative State Research, Education, and Extension Service.[
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Old 06-09-2011, 06:31 PM   #94
DAMN iNATOR
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nervous Ferret View Post
Hello no not on this black prez's watch. To the birds I say
Say what you want...I'm staying, and there's not a damn thing you can do about it.
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Old 06-09-2011, 06:39 PM   #95
The Naitch
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Smelly Meatball View Post
No actual Secretary of Paper Bags position?

You need someone to make and supply the bags like how Ted Dibiase Jr was Rhodes Secretary of Paper Bags.


In their secret meeting spot....





Lock Jaw and Smelly Meatball discuss important business matters in regards to paper bag distribution and logistics



Smelly Meatball: I promise big things this summer

Lock Jaw: Pffft...I do all the leg work

Last edited by The Naitch; 06-09-2011 at 07:00 PM.
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Old 06-09-2011, 06:39 PM   #96
VSG
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I am in for whatever position, "bro"
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Old 06-09-2011, 06:45 PM   #97
Nervous Ferret
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VSG you can have DAMN iNATORS position. Like he was doing any good anyway

All hail the new UPB U.N Ambassador, VSG
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Old 06-09-2011, 06:46 PM   #98
DAMN iNATOR
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nervous Ferret View Post
VSG you can have DAMN iNATORS position. Like he was doing any good anyway

All hail the new UPB U.N Ambassador, VSG
I WON'T ALLOW IT!
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Old 06-09-2011, 06:47 PM   #99
Nervous Ferret
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Sure thing Mr. President


OH WAIT
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Old 06-09-2011, 06:47 PM   #100
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Oh cool, I always wanted to inherit a madman's position and serve a well-hung black stud president
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Old 06-09-2011, 06:51 PM   #101
DAMN iNATOR
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Just for that, VSG...between the two of us...our friendship (what little we had anyway)?

IT'S OVER!

BACKSTABBING PRICK.
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Old 06-09-2011, 06:52 PM   #102
mhirn3
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mhirn3 is pretty cool (5,000+)mhirn3 is pretty cool (5,000+)mhirn3 is pretty cool (5,000+)mhirn3 is pretty cool (5,000+)
is running for Secretary of Commerce...I was going to say HUD, but then I realized I hate poor and needy assholes.
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Old 06-09-2011, 06:59 PM   #103
The Naitch
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The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)
keep an eye for the updates, from now on it will only be on page 1
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Old 06-09-2011, 07:06 PM   #104
VSG
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DAMN iNATOR View Post
Just for that, VSG...between the two of us...our friendship (what little we had anyway)?

IT'S OVER!

BACKSTABBING PRICK.
A custom title doesn't make it official, MAD iNATOR.
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Old 06-09-2011, 07:18 PM   #105
DAMN iNATOR
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Whatever. Douche.

EDIT: P.S. - Put that in your "custom title" and smoke it!
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Old 06-09-2011, 07:20 PM   #106
The Naitch
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The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)


Quote:
mhirn3 is the head of the United Paper Bags of TPWW Department of Commerce concerned with business and industry; the Department states its mission to be "to foster, promote, and develop the foreign and domestic commerce aka BRING IN THE DOUGH."[2] Until 1913 there was one Secretary of Commerce and Labor, uniting this department with the Department of Labor, which is now headed by a separate Secretary of Labor.[3]

The Office of the Secretary contains a Deputy Secretary of Commerce, a Chief of Staff, a Deputy Chief of Staff for Policy, an Assistant Secretary for Commerce and Intergovernmental Affairs, a Chief Financial Officer and Assistant Secretary for Administration, a Chief Information Officer, a General Counsel, an Inspector General, an Office of Business Liaison, an Office of Policy and Strategic Planning, an Office of Public Affairs, an Office of White House Liaison, and an International IPR Enforcement Coordinator.[4]

The current Secretary of Commerce is mhirn3, who was nominated for the post by Vice President The Naitch on June 6, 2011, and was confirmed by the UPB Senate by unanimous consent on the same day, asshole.[5]

mhirn3 is El Presidente's third choice for the post following New Mexico Governor Juan Cena, who dropped out of consideration in early January 2009, and Republican Senator D-Mac from Redneck Country, who withdrew his nomination in February 2009.
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Old 06-09-2011, 07:22 PM   #107
The Naitch
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The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)
fuck I feel like I'm c-fedding. Posting all these pics and shit, and watching this Ferret/VSG/DAMN iNATOR feud build up
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Old 06-09-2011, 07:23 PM   #108
DAMN iNATOR
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The Naitch View Post
fuck I feel like I'm c-fedding. Posting all these pics and shit, and watching this Ferret/VSG/DAMN iNATOR feud build up
So why don't you do something about it instead of just bitching and complaining?!:foc:
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Old 06-09-2011, 07:32 PM   #109
VSG
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Lol a neg rep from DAMN iNATOR. Bring back memories from my very first post here where he neg repped me
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Old 06-09-2011, 07:33 PM   #110
The Naitch
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The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)


*DAMN iNATOR and SaskatchewanChamp enjoy a nice walk in the park*
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Old 06-09-2011, 07:37 PM   #111
CSL
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lol DAMN iNATOR's angry downs neg reps are the best
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Old 06-09-2011, 07:37 PM   #112
Lock Jaw
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DAMN iNATOR gonna secede. Start his own country... with blackjack! And Hookers!
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Old 06-09-2011, 08:44 PM   #113
Juan
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lol @ DAMN iNATOR in this thread

Are you serious, bro?

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Old 06-09-2011, 09:36 PM   #114
The Naitch
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The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)The Naitch got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)
Quote:
Originally Posted by DAMN iNATOR View Post
I'll take one...*if* I can be assigned to the post of Ambassador to the U.N.

EDIT: AND if you can provide two bags...one for each in my avatar. Please.
*lol*

and lol @ being denied your 2 bags. Please.

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Old 06-09-2011, 10:44 PM   #115
Seth82
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fun read...
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Old 06-10-2011, 12:03 AM   #116
SlickyTrickyDamon
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Attorney General Warning:



Do not use this bag for your bag.
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Old 06-10-2011, 12:09 AM   #117
Volare
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Yo NerF





I got ya back.
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Old 06-10-2011, 12:11 AM   #118
Nervous Ferret
love yourself
 
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Thank you Volare.
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Old 06-10-2011, 12:13 AM   #119
Volare
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Heh, wonder if I can find some kind of bag badge.
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Old 06-10-2011, 12:24 AM   #120
XCaliber
 
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This stable is improving quickly and making the world a better place.
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