SmackDown Captions (Jan 29, 2004)

**Corkscrewed** · 01-30-2004, 01:55 AM

Vince: "And so, when you're playin Operation, if you take out this bone here, the alarm goes off and you lose! But I never lose! I wuv that game!"
Heyman: "Um... I think you've spent a little too much time off television..."

Danny had that "Uh oh, I think I have Hardcore Holly Disease" look on his face. Why couldn't he operate that dang Paul London Wheelbarrow???

Well, plunging your head into someone's chest and biting his heart out was certainly ONE way to win...

Kurt wasn't too pleased when he found out what Dawn had done with his real gold medals.

Eddie: "I don't get it, homes. Why does everyone keep on making head poop jokes about Jorge when Mysterio's mask looks like it's MADE of shit?"

Yeah, the Cenabot sometimes stiffens up.
But Dawn likes it stiff.

One of these days, Noble would get F-5 right.

Upon seeing the cameraman on the left photographing the butt of the cameraman right next to him, Jamie Noble lost his composure and collapsed on the second rope in laughter.

Leave to Noble to be the most intense stretching instructor ever.

Shame on those Cruiserweights! Not even stopping during their match to help a blind lady cross the street!

With the Noble/Nidia angle now over and Jamie with no real direction in the storylines, of course he'd pray for an escape from vendor duty... or worse, O'Haire Cage Cleaner!

I must say, Shannon looks ravishing with those highlights!

Damn you, Always450 for stealing the perfect setup for a "Brock Lesnar 'I Kill You!'" joke!
Eventually, the WWE writers came up with a role for all non-TV wrestlers: snuggletoy.

Lesnar was determined to be more ferocious stretch instructor than Noble... or kill someone trying...

Now wasn't the best time for Haas to check for hemorrhoids.

The WWE version of the Spiderman dance troupe was damn impressive.

Scientists seized this rare opportunity to study a real, live black hole in a controlled environment.

Cena hated those dreams where he was wrestling and all of the sudden he realized he was naked.
Big Show: "This isn't a dream."
Cena: "What? It's not?" *looks down* "Oh SHIT!" *runs*
Big Show: "Yup. It's big all over! Now I'm going to show you one of those innuendos!"
Cena: "Ahhhhhhh!!! Michael Jackson!!!!"

Billy just knew the "I'm an ass man" lyrics would come back to haunt him someday.

Cole: "Enough, Big Show! You already raped Cena! Do you really have to hold him down too???"

Rikishi was sooooo hungry... and Shelton's thigh just looked so juicy...
Indeed, Mark Henry Disease was spreading.

Eddie: "Tell another story, Uncle Billy!"
Gunn: "Okay, but this is the last one! Once there was a really fast mouse named Speedy..."

The crowd was confused. Why were Eddie and Kurt just standing around doing the Donkey Kong Dance?

That's the great thing about Eddie. He gets EVERYONE over!

OR

Kurt Angle certainly didn't need Eddie's help. He could get over easily on his own.

OR

It took Angle a few times to get the Tarantula right.

OR

Things turned tragic when Angle's fart rocket chose that exact moment to misfire.

OR

Eddie: "Are they okay?"
Angle: "Yes, the back of your boots are still clean."

Today's SmackDOWN! is brought to you by the letter 'H.'
Angle: "Did Corky just say H?"
Eddie: "H?"
Angle: "H!"

Yup, Angle's turning heel alright. Reverting back to his shoe thief days.

Angle wasn't too keen on the idea of using him to "mark the twain" of the glass ceiling.

Eddie: "They taste like... quemando!"

"This one's for you, Sean my friend! This one's for you!"

01-30-2004, 01:55 AM	#21
Corkscrewed Posts: 18,357	Vince: "And so, when you're playin Operation, if you take out this bone here, the alarm goes off and you lose! But I never lose! I wuv that game!" Heyman: "Um... I think you've spent a little too much time off television..." Danny had that "Uh oh, I think I have Hardcore Holly Disease" look on his face. Why couldn't he operate that dang Paul London Wheelbarrow??? Well, plunging your head into someone's chest and biting his heart out was certainly ONE way to win... Kurt wasn't too pleased when he found out what Dawn had done with his real gold medals. Eddie: "I don't get it, homes. Why does everyone keep on making head poop jokes about Jorge when Mysterio's mask looks like it's MADE of shit?" Yeah, the Cenabot sometimes stiffens up. But Dawn likes it stiff. One of these days, Noble would get F-5 right. Upon seeing the cameraman on the left photographing the butt of the cameraman right next to him, Jamie Noble lost his composure and collapsed on the second rope in laughter. Leave to Noble to be the most intense stretching instructor ever. Shame on those Cruiserweights! Not even stopping during their match to help a blind lady cross the street! With the Noble/Nidia angle now over and Jamie with no real direction in the storylines, of course he'd pray for an escape from vendor duty... or worse, O'Haire Cage Cleaner! I must say, Shannon looks ravishing with those highlights! Damn you, Always450 for stealing the perfect setup for a "Brock Lesnar 'I Kill You!'" joke! Eventually, the WWE writers came up with a role for all non-TV wrestlers: snuggletoy. Lesnar was determined to be more ferocious stretch instructor than Noble... or kill someone trying... Now wasn't the best time for Haas to check for hemorrhoids. The WWE version of the Spiderman dance troupe was damn impressive. Scientists seized this rare opportunity to study a real, live black hole in a controlled environment. Cena hated those dreams where he was wrestling and all of the sudden he realized he was naked. Big Show: "This isn't a dream." Cena: "What? It's not?" looks down "Oh SHIT!" runs Big Show: "Yup. It's big all over! Now I'm going to show you one of those innuendos!" Cena: "Ahhhhhhh!!! Michael Jackson!!!!" Billy just knew the "I'm an ass man" lyrics would come back to haunt him someday. Cole: "Enough, Big Show! You already raped Cena! Do you really have to hold him down too???" Rikishi was sooooo hungry... and Shelton's thigh just looked so juicy... Indeed, Mark Henry Disease was spreading. Eddie: "Tell another story, Uncle Billy!" Gunn: "Okay, but this is the last one! Once there was a really fast mouse named Speedy..." The crowd was confused. Why were Eddie and Kurt just standing around doing the Donkey Kong Dance? That's the great thing about Eddie. He gets EVERYONE over! OR Kurt Angle certainly didn't need Eddie's help. He could get over easily on his own. OR It took Angle a few times to get the Tarantula right. OR Things turned tragic when Angle's fart rocket chose that exact moment to misfire. OR Eddie: "Are they okay?" Angle: "Yes, the back of your boots are still clean." Today's SmackDOWN! is brought to you by the letter 'H.' Angle: "Did Corky just say H?" Eddie: "H?" Angle: "H!" Yup, Angle's turning heel alright. Reverting back to his shoe thief days. Angle wasn't too keen on the idea of using him to "mark the twain" of the glass ceiling. Eddie: "They taste like... quemando!" "This one's for you, Sean my friend! This one's for you!"