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Old 01-05-2011, 04:24 PM   #1
JimmyMess
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How is Cena wins mean its fake? I'm pretty sure he'd do just fine in a fight. Has a fist like a sledgehammer.
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Old 01-05-2011, 04:33 PM   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JimmyMess View Post
How is Cena wins mean its fake? I'm pretty sure he'd do just fine in a fight. Has a fist like a sledgehammer.
every week?
fuck off
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Old 01-05-2011, 04:30 PM   #3
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Because 'Cena wins' is arse-explodingly hilarious no matter what the situation is.
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Old 01-05-2011, 04:30 PM   #4
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Oh, apparently it's not actually
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Old 01-05-2011, 04:36 PM   #5
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He doesn't win every week though does he. He wins a lot. Which, in comparative terms, means he's 'one of the best'. Which main eventers tend to be presented as.
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Old 01-05-2011, 07:12 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CSL View Post
He doesn't win every week though does he. He wins a lot. Which, in comparative terms, means he's 'one of the best'. Which main eventers tend to be presented as.
Even when he loses he wins
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Old 01-05-2011, 04:38 PM   #7
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Irish whips are the most ridiculous. You push a guy and what does he do instead of falling down? He runs, bounces against rubber rober after turning around to run into you doing whatever you want to him.
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Old 01-05-2011, 06:54 PM   #8
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Low-ki/Daniel Bryan fuck it ANYONE getting their opponents to their knees and kicking the ever loving shit out of them yet they dont collapse right away not until that last kick to the head in fact staying in a kneel position for said kicks is even more ludicrous but goddamn it looks cool
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Old 01-07-2011, 04:02 AM   #9
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Does your cunt of a wife realize that every show on television is fake? Tell her to shut the fuck up and go watch some fake doctors perform fake surgery and talk about their fake emotions.

lol i gotta remember that
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Old 01-07-2011, 10:07 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sixx View Post
Irish whips are the most ridiculous. You push a guy and what does he do instead of falling down? He runs, bounces against rubber rober after turning around to run into you doing whatever you want to him.
I was going to post this.
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Old 01-05-2011, 04:38 PM   #11
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Yeah Cena's kind of a beast. Dunno if you guys noticed. He has a bit of muscle.
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Old 01-05-2011, 04:42 PM   #12
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Yeah, people bending over waiting for a move is silly as well.

If he's that unconcsious why doesn't he just like, you know, fall down?
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Old 01-05-2011, 05:35 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sixx View Post
Yeah, people bending over waiting for a move is silly as well.

If he's that unconcsious why doesn't he just like, you know, fall down?
Yeah, this.

The set ups for Booker and Truth's axe kicks are just too funny sometimes.
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Old 01-05-2011, 04:49 PM   #14
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Old 01-05-2011, 04:50 PM   #15
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Also, cage matches always get to me. Half the time it is just "Ok. Why did he not just walk out the door?" or "Surely he can't be having that much of a hard time climbing that thing".
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Old 01-05-2011, 05:11 PM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lock Jaw View Post
Also, cage matches always get to me. Half the time it is just "Ok. Why did he not just walk out the door?" or "Surely he can't be having that much of a hard time climbing that thing".
Homicide did.
Last edited by loopydate; 01-05-2011 at 06:20 PM. Reason: Joke's funnier if the video is included.
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Old 01-05-2011, 05:18 PM   #17
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Pretty much all the stuff above, minus the shit posts.
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Old 01-05-2011, 05:43 PM   #18
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EVERY finishing move is ridiculously fake.
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Old 01-05-2011, 05:49 PM   #19
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And some are more ridiculous than others.
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Old 01-05-2011, 06:36 PM   #20
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When one guy checks on the other after a big spot.
Blatant calling of the match.
Earl Hebner's stupid full rotate of the shoulder on a near fall.
When the ref doesn't hear the use of a steel chair behind his back.
When title matches are "overturned" for use of underhand tactics when for the most part the results go unchanged in normal matches.
This:
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Old 01-06-2011, 05:12 AM   #21
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No matter how many times I watch this, it's still one of the greatest things in the history of pro wrestling.
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Old 01-05-2011, 07:12 PM   #22
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I'll refer to the always quotable-Kevin Nash who said...

you wouldn't beat a guy in a bar, and when he's down climb up on top of the bar and drop an elbow on him.

Wrestling is pre-determined... the whole thing is blatantly obvious. You don't watch it for the realism.... you don't have of these conversations about any other show on tv.

just enjoyyyyyyyy it. or don't waaaaaatch it.
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Old 01-05-2011, 07:40 PM   #23
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JimmyMess View Post
I'll refer to the always quotable-Kevin Nash who said...

you wouldn't beat a guy in a bar, and when he's down climb up on top of the bar and drop an elbow on him.

Wrestling is pre-determined... the whole thing is blatantly obvious. You don't watch it for the realism.... you don't have of these conversations about any other show on tv.

just enjoyyyyyyyy it. or don't waaaaaatch it.
Dude, if I beat the fuck out of a guy in a bar fight, first thing I'm doing is a moonsault off the bar. People are gonna remember that I was there.
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Old 01-07-2011, 03:16 PM   #24
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Quote:
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Dude, if I beat the fuck out of a guy in a bar fight, first thing I'm doing is a moonsault off the bar. People are gonna remember that I was there.
Yeah I'd probably remember "that drunk guy who tried a wrestling move off the bar... yeah it didn't work... hilarious though" haha
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Old 01-05-2011, 07:28 PM   #25
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o forgot Kane & Taker can shoot lightning from their fingertips and Hornswoggle can do assorted magical acts.
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Old 01-05-2011, 07:39 PM   #26
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Nothing fake about a DDT. Then again, that hasn't been a "finisher" for anyone but Tommy Dreamer and Raven in like 20 years.

Nah, my favorite tell about how fake wrestling is... more than getting punched in the face and not bruising... being hit with (improbable and impractical) moves that -- if by some divine intervention ever DID land -- would probably cripple or kill someone, and yet people bounce right back up.
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Old 01-05-2011, 08:05 PM   #27
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Nothing fake about a DDT. Then again, that hasn't been a "finisher" for anyone but Tommy Dreamer and Raven in like 20 years.








Just 4 off the back of my mind.
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Old 01-05-2011, 08:01 PM   #28
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I saw this on TV years ago... Even though it's fake, it's more entertaining than that boring shit UFC.

HA, Even the fans esp. the sign boards are fake too!!
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Old 01-05-2011, 08:05 PM   #29
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Old 01-05-2011, 11:38 PM   #30
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The one thats really stupid is the slow mOtion climb that happens during ladder matches
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Old 01-07-2011, 10:10 AM   #31
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fox View Post
6. You can be champion forever if you want. Just get disqualified when it looks like you're going to lose. Every time. Or just walk off with your belt. The rules state you will lose, but you will keep your belt, even though you're being a little bitch. Chris Jericho should have gotten himself DQ'd at WrestleMania X8. I mean come on.
You can say what you want about one-time deals, but you do understand that even in storylines, wrestlers have been threatened with having titles stripped for this behavior; and not only that, wrestlers who try to walk out on a match have occasionally been threatened with losing their titles (see Wrestlemania 9, Hogan/Beefcake vs Money Inc.)

Quote:
Originally Posted by dhellova guy View Post
When someone gets attacked in the ring, makes his comeback, the heal leaves the ring and the face just stands there like the ropes are holding him back. I always, to this day, yell at the TV "GO GET HIM! HES RIGHT THERE!"
This actually makes sense. In order to exit the ring you will make yourself vulnerable for a moment when you bend over, climb through the ropes, and hop to the floor. If your opponent is a cowardly, opportunistic jerk, it's always possible that he'll take advantage of you during this window. I'm sure I've seen this exact thing happen, though I can't remember exactly when.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rammsteinmad View Post
If my wife swore at me that much I would punch her in the head.
For one thing, do we really beleive this guy has a wife? And if he does, it makes perfect sense that he'd put up with any level of abuse because she's likely the only woman stupid enough to deal with him.

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Originally Posted by Tommy Gunn View Post
This is just another example of the supreme stupidity of WCW. Even if the TV viewing audience could see the Warrior in the mirror, the announcers should not have been able to. THe way it's pulled off, Bischoff is the ONLY PERSON who can't see him, which makes HIM the crazy one.
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Old 01-07-2011, 10:19 AM   #32
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tedious View Post
You can say what you want about one-time deals, but you do understand that even in storylines, wrestlers have been threatened with having titles stripped for this behavior; and not only that, wrestlers who try to walk out on a match have occasionally been threatened with losing their titles (see Wrestlemania 9, Hogan/Beefcake vs Money Inc.)
.
This is why authority figures are great. Although it also begs the question why they don't reverse injustices and screwjobs more often. Especially lower down the card.
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Old 01-06-2011, 08:10 PM   #33
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1. People Die and then Come Back to Life (see: Paul Bearer)

2. US Law does not apply in the WWE Universe (spousal abuse, assault, assault with a deadly weapon, attempted homicide, borderline rape, borderline indecent exposure, human sacrifice to Dark Gods, vehicular manslaughter attempts, grand theft auto, destruction of property, and more do not apply).

3. Hulk Hogan's "Hulk Up" (come the fuck on)

4. Wrestlers can take an absolute beating for 15-20 minutes and still be standing, but one accidental bump into a referee and the ref will be unconscious for 5 minutes.

5. Val Venis didn't quit wrestling after getting his penis chopped off. Come on.

6. You can be champion forever if you want. Just get disqualified when it looks like you're going to lose. Every time. Or just walk off with your belt. The rules state you will lose, but you will keep your belt, even though you're being a little bitch. Chris Jericho should have gotten himself DQ'd at WrestleMania X8. I mean come on.

7. Referees don't hear entrance music of interfering/returning superstars and stay concentrated on the match at hand.

8. Despite having cameras shooting every angle of a match, there is no referee "playback option" to see if cheating occured or not.

9. Fans (plants) get beaten up by heels and it is not national news the next day.

10. Undertaker can shoot electricity from the sky to the ring at will. Kane can set things on fire and turn all of the lights in the arena red.

11. John Cena cannot be killed except by Kryptonite.
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Old 01-06-2011, 09:13 PM   #34
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fox View Post
5. Val Venis didn't quit wrestling after getting his penis chopped off. Come on.
I can't believe I'm saying this, but Val experienced shrinkage just before Wally Yamaguchi could cut his penis off. He bragged about it the next week on RAW with John Bobbitt. Yes, this was actually how this angle was booked.

This is one of those things I point to when people talk about how amazing the Attitude Era was.
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Old 01-06-2011, 09:25 PM   #35
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AMEN!
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Old 01-07-2011, 07:47 AM   #36
James Steele
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Triple H isn't World Heavyweight Champion.
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Old 01-07-2011, 09:30 AM   #37
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All that barbed wire in ECW and those fake ass lacerations on Terry Funk and Sabu's body.

Photobucket

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Mankind through the top of the HIAC with that tooth coming out of his nose... everyone knows it was a marshmallow.

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Hardcore Holly and that laceration on his back, he was obviously juicing.

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Droz so over played that "neck injury" with his life long devotion to being in a wheel chair just to make the story seem real.

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Stone Colds body is fine he just really wants to be a cupcake designer... thats why he wont come back to WWE.

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Devon Dudlys head looks like a manwich.... due to all the juicing

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Ken Anderson does not really have a concusion...well probably very overplayed at this point.
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Old 01-07-2011, 09:47 AM   #38
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Not so much a tell, but another irritation.

Someone's kicking the shit out of some one.

Ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding.

What.. they expect them to be so annoyed by the constant dinging they'll stop?
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Old 01-07-2011, 09:51 AM   #39
Blue Demon
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Vince appearing on TV after being blown up.
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Old 01-07-2011, 10:14 AM   #40
Theo Dious
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sascha View Post
Vince appearing on TV after being blown up.
Even though that thing was pretty well scrapped in the wake of the Benoit incident, I'm pretty sure Vince stated in his first kayfabe appearance afterwards that the exploding limo was a hoax he set up to see how everyone would deal with his death.
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