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Old 04-15-2004, 01:22 AM   #1
bobfinger
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Mankind vs. Undertaker Hell in a Cell
Where can I find a review of this match on the internet?
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Old 04-15-2004, 01:40 AM   #2
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Old 04-15-2004, 11:55 AM   #3
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dude... why do you even need a review for that match, its like one of the most famous of all time. Just rent KOTR 98 and watch it.
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Old 04-15-2004, 02:26 PM   #4
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Loose Cannon's Review:

I don't know, The 1998 King of The Ring encounter between Mankind and Undertaker was very lackluster to say the least. No drama, no storytelling, no wrestling, no pops from the crowd, just a lot of no's. The match started off with Mankind climbing the Cell. Wow, can you say Dumb. Why would he climb the Cell? Wrestling matches are suppossed to be in the ring. So Undertaker, who is really not the sharpest knife in the draw to begin with, also climbs the Cell with Mankind waiting at the top for him. Make sense, I think not.

When they both are at the top, Mankind and Taker do a lot of walking around, almost killing themsleves by almost falling right threw the Cell. A few punches and a few chairshots...BLAH BLAH BLAH. Then, in what I call the most anticlimatic and boring moment in wrestling history, happens. Undertaker grabs Mankind and throws him off the Cell threw the table on the floor. BORING. If you watch the tape, you will see the crowd pop huge. What people don't know is that the crowd was popping for some girl flashing the crowd in Section E. So then we get a long drawn out break from the action as Mankind is sleeping on the floor. I guess he even thought the match a snooze fest so far. Oh and By the way, you couldn't see, but there was a trampoline at the bottom of the Cell that broke Mankind's Fall. The WWF did some great editing techniques on live TV so the viewers couldn't see the trampoline. Yes, they edited LIVE TV.

OK Mankind is being put on a strecher and being taken to the back. Thank god, my misery is just about over. But wait, I guess someone thought I needed to endure some more torture with a few more glasses of JOLT COLA. Mankind comes back and starts climbing the Cell again. Yeah..... Again. J.R. is really doing a great job in putting over Mic Foley here, but that's because he just won a free small cone from Dairy Queen at that very moment. Mankind and Taker go back up and continue the CRAP. They do some more punching and whatever at the top of the Cell. Then in another anticlimatic moment, TWO IN ONE MATCH, Taker chokeslams Mankind threw the Cell into the Ring. Someone shove some asprin in my eyes because this is really giving me a headache now. Mankind's fall is broken, yet again, this time by Max Mini, who had run into the ring to act as a cushion for Mick. Of course the viewers couldn't see him because of he's a little guy. Mic Falls asleep yet again and I guess is dreaming about his classic match with the British Bulldogs back in the 80's. Taker jumps down into the ring from the top of the Cell and almost breaks his ankle in the proceess. lol.

So Terry Funk and a couple of fans come into the ring and start playing doctor right in the middle of the match. Well I really needed a piss break, so it's okay I guess. Funk receieves a Chokeslam from Taker because he was looking at some pictures of Taker's wife earlier in the evening. Mankind gets up again and this match continues my epic journey through Hell. Mankind and Taker do some more punching and Mankind makes a comeback. Mankind goes for thumbtacks, which were brought to you by Fisher Price of Course. You think they were real? Not a chance. Anyway, Mankind throws the fake Tacks everywhere and then hits the Mandible Claw on Taker. J.R. is going nuts at the annoucers booth because he had just got word that his mom was making chocalate chip cookies back home.

Taker gets out of the Claw and lifts Mankind up on his back. Taker backs towards those fake tacks with Mankind still on his back. Taker falls back and Mankind hits the Thumbtacks. Mankind rolls around screaming in pain. Yes, Fisher Price toys can hurt you if your not careful. Mankind gets back up and Taker nails a tombstone on him. 1.2.3.

Your Winner: Me, because I survived this shitfest.

My overall rating: -50,000 stars
Last edited by Loose Cannon; 04-15-2004 at 02:37 PM.
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Old 04-16-2004, 08:34 AM   #5
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LFMMFO Loose Cannon

REP THIS MAN!!!!!
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Old 04-16-2004, 08:59 AM   #6
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You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Loose Cannon again.
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Old 04-16-2004, 10:23 AM   #7
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Old 04-16-2004, 10:35 AM   #8
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bobfinger does not have that much rep yet (10+)
I know what happenend in the match, it's almost photographic for me. My dickhead English teacher says that I need sources for it though.

Thanks Loose Cannon, you will be on my works cited page, an antagonostic view is always appreciated.
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Old 04-16-2004, 11:19 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bobfinger
I know what happenend in the match, it's almost photographic for me. My dickhead English teacher says that I need sources for it though.

Thanks Loose Cannon, you will be on my works cited page, an antagonostic view is always appreciated.
Look, if your after a serious review i'll type one up when i'm at home. I'm in work right now so i can't
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Old 04-16-2004, 11:23 AM   #10
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Maybe I should write more of these mixed up reviews and post them in the wrestling forum. I enjoyed typing that.
Last edited by Loose Cannon; 04-16-2004 at 03:11 PM.
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Old 04-16-2004, 11:36 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Loose Cannon
Maybe I should write more of these mixed up reviews and post them in the wrestling column. I enjoyed typing that.
DO IT!!!!

That stuff is gold!!!!!!
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Old 04-16-2004, 05:28 PM   #12
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Old 04-16-2004, 06:20 PM   #13
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You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Loose Cannon again.

Damn.
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Old 04-16-2004, 06:22 PM   #14
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Also at Max Mini
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Old 04-16-2004, 06:31 PM   #15
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OK, I've decided to make a little Column out of these crazy reviews and I'll post my next one in the wrestling forum. Look for a review of eathier Owen vs Bret at WM 10 or Angle vs Benoit at Royal Rumble 2003 I believe.
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Old 04-16-2004, 07:52 PM   #16
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Just list the actual event of KOTR 98 on your sources.
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Old 04-16-2004, 08:55 PM   #17
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