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Old 04-17-2004, 08:40 PM   #1
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The State of the Announce Table
I would say the State of the Announce Table has never been as terrible as it has now. I mean the current WWE announcers are not too interesting and actually distract me from the matches completely. I start hearing them babble about something and I totally lose focus on the match. The NWA: TNA announcers need to lay off the speed. The act as if every little thing is the end of the freaking world. Not too mention I'm sick and tired of every move without a name being called a senton!

JR & The King - Now these two are absolutely brutal. They used to be the bomb but nowadays they suck. They are the "shockmaster of the announce table". I find The King so redundant. PUPPIES! And how many ****ing times is he going to ask how long Stacy Keibler's legs are? These two actually distract me from the actual match because of thier horrible commentating where they wander off topic. I have to mute the TV in order to enjoy the match. Otherwise thier mindless ramblings make me space out.

Tazz & Cole - These two haven't been too bad. They have been better but lately it looks like Tazz is attempting to be the announcer who always takes the heels side during matches and he just is not too good at it. Tazz is still hilarious neverless and Cole is pretty good at what he does. So I don't really have too much beef with them.

Tenay & West - I like Tenay's informative lessons on the history of wrestling and the wrestlers but when it comes to announcing and trying to sell angles, wrestlers or whatever he's not too good. Don West does not really impress me at all. He is the worst for over selling. He acts like aliens just invaded and crucified Bush Jr. on every occasion. I also hate how they call moves without names 'Senton'. I swear to God that they have given 50 different moves the same name. Could you be any more uncreative?

DeMott & Mathews - Mathews is a bigger dork than Cole could ever dream of being. Mathews does a good job calling the matches though. He just needs to lose the dorkiness and the occasional wandering completely off topic. DeMott sometimes makes me laugh because of his simple thinking and literal interpretations. Another good aspect of this announcing team is the 'DeMott Turning Points' or whatever it is called.

Snow & Coach - Why has The Coach been given a bigger push than RVD, Storm, Hardy, O'Haire, Dragon, London and I could go on AND ON! I can't believe he's on the Backlash card when Lance Storm is not. Its Canada, Storm will easily get a huge reaction not to mention a well-deserved push. I hope Tajiri kicks his head in.


Well, that was a huge rant and alot of bitching & moaning. Finally got that off my chest. How do you guys feel about the current announcing table scene? Do you like it? or Do you not like it?
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Old 04-17-2004, 09:03 PM   #2
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One thing I really hate right at the moment is the lack of heel commentators. Jeryy Lawler needs to be the cocky heel that you can just picture being in the ring smiling while a heel cuts a promo. Everything else is fine, though.
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Old 04-17-2004, 09:04 PM   #3
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Glad Tazz dosent have to keep saying here comes the pain anymore.
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Old 04-17-2004, 09:05 PM   #4
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remember when Lawler was a huge heel because he hated Bret Hart?
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Old 04-17-2004, 09:11 PM   #5
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I hate Taz playing the heel announcer. It doesn't matter if he's good at it or not; I hate the entire idea. Smackdown was the 'wrestling' show and having a color guy who called the matches straight up made more sense. He's still pretty good ( a few weeks ago he did a great job putting Dupree over on his SD debut) bu I just don't like the direction his announcing is taking.

JR & The King are caricatures of what used to make them entertaining.

Really, the announcer I like the most right now is Tenay. I always feel like I'm getting educated while I'm watching the matches. He knows every move by name, by what worker calls it, and usually by its original Latin root structure. You can tell he works hard at his knowledge and it adds a lot to his call.
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Old 04-17-2004, 09:11 PM   #6
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remember when Lawler was a huge heel because he hated Bret Hart?
Yeah, I really enjoyed that feud. LOL @ the Kiss my Foot match...
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Old 04-17-2004, 09:19 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Alienoid06
One thing I really hate right at the moment is the lack of heel commentators. Jeryy Lawler needs to be the cocky heel that you can just picture being in the ring smiling while a heel cuts a promo. Everything else is fine, though
Are you serious? Do you hear the way The King sucks up to everytihng Evolution does? Don't you hear him going on and ona bout how Triple H "can't be beat by Shelton Benjamin. No way, JR..nuh uh..c'mon Flair DO SOMETHING!!" You really can't see The King standing there, holding a mic, giggling like a school girl while HHH cuts a 15 minute promo???

The King and JR are too biased..that's why its so tough to listen to them.
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Old 04-17-2004, 09:31 PM   #8
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The best announcer in my opinion has to be Joey Styles. He actually calls the action in the ring and disconcerns himself with petty shit that JR/King can not get away from.

Either way, I would like to see some fresh faces sitting in the announcing table.
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Old 04-17-2004, 09:36 PM   #9
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Agreed. The current state of the Announce Table isn't that good, my fellow wrestling fans. I was watching Superbrawl '98 the other night and, aside from Schiavone, the announcing was pretty good. Tenay was informative and Heenan was hilarious. And Schiavone was all right...except that he actually said (and I quote) "Coming up next, we've got a special added match that is going to make this arena literally explode!"

Plus, I'm just bumping this to try to get RAW IS MAVEN's shit off the front page.
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Old 04-17-2004, 09:36 PM   #10
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Joey Styles was grea with Cyrus. When he was with Gertner, they got into the character thing a little too much, too. Still entertaining, though.

But yeah, Styles would be a huge improvement over anyone the WWE has announcing for them at the moment.
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Old 04-17-2004, 09:39 PM   #11
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When Paul Heyman takes over "The Kings" spot as heel commentator, then i'll be happy. I like Tazz/Cole though.
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Old 04-17-2004, 09:39 PM   #12
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Styles and Gertner=awesome chemistry
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Old 04-17-2004, 09:42 PM   #13
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I miss Joey Styles. A Styles/Heenan combination would be
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Old 04-17-2004, 09:46 PM   #14
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Styles + Heenan = Greatest Announce Team Ever!!
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Old 04-17-2004, 10:17 PM   #15
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Lawler's horrible. JR's fine, but Lawler is really, really bad.
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Old 04-17-2004, 10:26 PM   #16
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Originally Posted by loopydate
Agreed. The current state of the Announce Table isn't that good, my fellow wrestling fans. I was watching Superbrawl '98 the other night and, aside from Schiavone, the announcing was pretty good. Tenay was informative and Heenan was hilarious. And Schiavone was all right...except that he actually said (and I quote) "Coming up next, we've got a special added match that is going to make this arena literally explode!"

Plus, I'm just bumping this to try to get RAW IS MAVEN's shit off the front page.
LOL

I can see black font on the TPWW (Blue) color scheme.

And yeah, I pretty much agree with the first post.
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Old 04-17-2004, 10:27 PM   #17
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LOL, it's better than that one ECW announcer. That guy made me want to fucking kill myself every time someone hit a big move.

"OWW MY GADD!!!!!!!!!!! (Y'all know what I'm talking about.)
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Old 04-17-2004, 10:35 PM   #18
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JR has lost it. King has lost it too, but it's a little more blatant in his case.

Cole makes me want to hurt someone, preferably someone with frosted hair and an artfag goatee.

At this point, aside from Tazz, the announce teams are so horrible they could put Nick Dinsmore behind the announcer's table as "Eugene" and it'd still be a slight improvement.

Eugene: Man go boom.
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Old 04-17-2004, 10:46 PM   #19
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Quote:
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Cole makes me want to hurt someone, preferably someone with frosted hair and an artfag goatee.
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Old 04-17-2004, 11:15 PM   #20
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Quote:
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Cole makes me want to hurt someone, preferably someone with frosted hair and an artfag goatee.
LOL.... you are so getting rep as soon as I get a computer that works. Probally on Tuesday.
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Old 04-17-2004, 11:57 PM   #21
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The best announcer in my opinion has to be Joey Styles. He actually calls the action in the ring and disconcerns himself with petty shit that JR/King can not get away from.

Either way, I would like to see some fresh faces sitting in the announcing table.
Damn right, Joey Styles was the shit. Awesome announcer, and Gertner was pretty funny. Funniest though would most definetly be Heenan.

Lawler comes off as an old perv when any of the chicks come out.
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Old 04-18-2004, 06:06 PM   #22
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If this was 98-2000 and if anybody badmouthed King/J.R, I would have slapped them. Well, not really, but I would strongly disagree. I usually ignore their commentary as much as possible. I like Tazz however. It just sucks his push in WWE (then WWF) went to hell, and he went to announcing.
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Old 04-18-2004, 06:25 PM   #23
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I loved JR/Heyman, always at odds with each other, it was great
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Old 04-18-2004, 06:26 PM   #24
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yo man
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Old 04-18-2004, 06:28 PM   #25
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I thought you were going to say something about how wrestlers never get put through the announcer's table any more...
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Old 04-18-2004, 07:24 PM   #26
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I miss JR and Heyman. JR is so country and Paul is so New York, it's a strange combination but it's hilarious and entertaining. I'd take Ross and Heyman over Ross and Lawler any day. If The King doesn't leave the announce table soon my brain is sure to start hemmoraging one of these Monday nights.
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Old 04-18-2004, 08:34 PM   #27
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Yes, JR and Heyman were an interesting tandem for that brief period the two of them were the announcers...

by then, a lot of people were pissed King was gone, and while I'm glad to have him back, there was nothing as funny as when Heyman was announcing. Rhyno matches have never been the same since Heyman stopped announcing for WWE.
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Old 04-18-2004, 08:44 PM   #28
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Heyman was fresh, at least. King came back, and it was as though he had never left...Same 3 lines and all...
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Old 04-18-2004, 09:15 PM   #29
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On another note, my beef with the current WWE announcing is moreso with JR than with King. King has been stagnant with his pining for puppies, and what have you...

...but the main problem with (RAW) announcing is the injection of certain political undertones within. The first slap was when JR asked the question, "so who are you voting for?" to King, about 4 years ago... it got progressively worse last year when JR continued on with comments about "liberating Iraq", and so on. Keep the politics out of WWE announcing. A Clinton "Slick Willie" joke is good every once in a while, but...don't play up to the "redneck sheep" stereotype too hard...

I dunno, JR could do no wrong to me before now. Even without the political commentary, it seems like what he's said has been slipping.

With Tazz and Cole, it seems like Michael Cole is still trying too hard sometimes, yet Tazz is cool in his role as announcer. He's the closest thing to Paul Heyman announcing that WWE has right now. Just so as long as Tazz doesn't become the kiss-ass for the heels.

Coach has been kind of off as a "heel" announcer, he's in the same boat as Tazz. Al Snow, however, is great. Sometimes it takes a wrestler to call a wrestler (see Tazz).

I like the tandem of Matthews and DeMott as well, but Josh Matthews has the same problem as Michael Cole -- trying too hard. DeMott is cool. Another great wrestler-turned-announcer...
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Old 04-19-2004, 11:07 AM   #30
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Someone mentioned King going off topic, and I remembered something.

"I love how Stacey's legs go all the way up, and then, they make an ass out of themselves!"

"Who the hell mentioned Stacey Kiebler? That was two matches ago! Flair and Michaels are in the ring!"

Or something like that.
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Old 04-19-2004, 01:04 PM   #31
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Styles and Gertner=awesome chemistry
Thank you!
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Old 04-20-2004, 12:26 AM   #32
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Evolution
Someone mentioned King going off topic, and I remembered something.

"I love how Stacey's legs go all the way up, and then, they make an ass out of themselves!"

"Who the hell mentioned Stacey Kiebler? That was two matches ago! Flair and Michaels are in the ring!"

Or something like that.
Reminds me of Smackdown: Shut Your Mouth on the PS2...you'll be using a female CAW and somewhere, King makes a Stacey Keibler comment.
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Old 04-20-2004, 12:30 AM   #33
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yeah the announce table's pretty busted up maybe the wwe should buy a new one instead of just supergluing it backtogether every week... oh wait.. i dont get it..
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Old 04-20-2004, 11:30 AM   #34
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Hey Batsu, that's probably what I'm thinking of.

"I love the puppies, JR"

"King are you even listening to a word I'm saying?"

Side note, JR hadn't said anything for 3 minutes.
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Old 04-20-2004, 12:22 PM   #35
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I got to admit that JR/King really get on my nerves.
They need to realise that fans of wrestling are;
a) sometimes educated
b) sometimes live outside a trailer park
c) sometimes have visited outside the US/Canada
d) are occasionally intelligent
The sooner they do that, the sooner they'll realise that they can't go on spouting all this utter pish and offending our intelect.

Broken down:
JR is a solid commentator,
King is a tube,
Cole is blander than a bag of flour,
Tazz is pretty funny and needs someone he doesn't need to carry,
Josh is about as much use as a back pocket in a sock,
Coach is about as welcome as a fart in a space-suit,
and Bill DeMott is quite technically competent and speaks like he enjoys talking about it.
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Old 04-20-2004, 01:18 PM   #36
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JR and King have gotten too wacky recently,but before they were so much better. Heel Tazz doing color annoys me except when he would say Brock's catchphrase when Brock would do his entrance.Heyman and Joey Styles are awesome IMO , and their repetitive catchphrases could never annoy me. "GORE GORE GORE!" "OH MY GOODDD!" Enuff said.
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Old 04-20-2004, 01:26 PM   #37
Sephiroth
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Sephiroth puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Sephiroth puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Sephiroth puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Sephiroth puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Sephiroth puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Sephiroth puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Sephiroth puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Sephiroth puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Sephiroth puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)
Newsflash: Goldberg will be the new Announcer of RAW

JR: Baw gawd!
Goldberg: Baw Gawd! Draw Bawgat!
JR: Hey, that was my line
Goldberg: Baw Gawd!
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