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Old 07-01-2004, 12:41 AM   #1
Loose Cannon
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The Loose Report
Hello and welcome to the "Loose Report" In my report I bring you all the latest news and rumors happening inside the world of wrestling. My sources come from all over and they shall remain nameless. Maybe my sources are one of you, who knows. Anyway, let's get to the news.



Bradshaw won the WWE Title this past week at the Great American Bash in a tough match against Eddie Guerrero. Sources say that before the match started, Bradshaw was seen reading "Mein Kampf" with a white sheet over his head while using various copies of the "Diary of Anne Frank" as seat coushins. When speaking to Bradshaw after the Title win, he said those pre match rituals usually help him put on stellar matches for the fans.



In other news, apparently the WWE has come up with a new gimmmick for Garrison Cade as he will play a character similar to The "HBK" character when it first took off. Sources say that this new character will include Cade wrestling on Heat, , jobbing to A-Train, getting zero amount of mic time, and finally, changing his character again in 3 months.



Chavo Classic was fired by the company last week after no showing a couple of WWE shows. Sources say the real reason Classic no showed the WWE shows was apparently because a storyline had been laid out for him which included jobbing the Crusierweight Title to Shane McMahon's 5 month old baby boy. Classic was said to be a little pissed off at this stunt.



It has been said that NWATNA has put on some quality shows since the start of Impact. Sources claim the ratings have been great and better then expected. If anyone happens to actually see these ratings at some point, please contact me.



Some great news for the 1 Lita fan out there. Apparently Lita's new storyline with Kane is expected to take on quite a twist in the next couple of weeks. Sources claim the WWE will run an angle where Matt Hardy and Kane will share custody of the new baby boy after it is shockingly revealed that the child is actually both of there's. Various Skits will be run on WWE programming each week which will feature Matt, Kane and Lita taking the new child to the doctor, ballgames, and the zoo. The Title of these skits you ask: TWO GUYS, A GIRL AND ONE FK'ED UP WWE STORYLINE



In other TNA news, Jeff Hardy made his shocking return to the TNA PPV last week by challenging AJ Styles for his X division Championship. Apparently Jeff Hardy had no idea he would be wrestling that night until he walked into the arena. Sources say Jeff was expecting to preform his musical act in front of his screaming fans, but soon realized what was going on when he found out that the people actually paid money to see a show.



And Finally, Chris Benoit is slated to lose his Title to HHH at Summerslam. Sources claim Benoit is ok with this and is showing no signs of bitterness towards HHH and the company. Apparently his good freind Chris Jericho pointed out what happens when you DO show bitterness towards HHH and the company for having to drop the World Title at one of the biggest PPV's of the year.


Well that's it for this edition of the "Loose Report" Stay Tuned for more editions in the future.


---Scott Hall spotted crossing a street with Kevin Nash: Possible NWO REFORMATION- CLICK HERE.
Last edited by Loose Cannon; 07-01-2004 at 11:01 AM.
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Old 07-01-2004, 12:42 AM   #2
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And yes this is a blatant ripoff of Doctor Gonzo, but smeone had to take it over.
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Old 07-01-2004, 12:55 AM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Loose Cannon

In other news, apparently the WWE has come up with a new gimmmick for Garrison Cade as he will play a character similar to The "HBK" character when it first took off. Sources say that this new character will include Cade wrestling on Velocity, , jobbing to A-Train, getting zero amount of mic time, and finally, changing his character again in 3 months.
Psst A-trains on Raw.
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Old 07-01-2004, 12:56 AM   #4
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so is Cade.
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Old 07-01-2004, 12:57 AM   #5
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changed it to Heat
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Old 07-01-2004, 01:03 AM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Loose Cannon
In other news, apparently the WWE has come up with a new gimmmick for Garrison Cade as he will play a character similar to The "HBK" character when it first took off. Sources say that this new character will include Cade wrestling on Heat, , jobbing to A-Train, getting zero amount of mic time, and finally, changing his character again in 3 months.
Pssst Cades on smack down.
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Old 07-01-2004, 01:04 AM   #7
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Cades on Raw. He's with the Coach every week buddy. Don't you watch.
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Old 07-01-2004, 01:11 AM   #8
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I thought cade was the good one in the tag team? oh man my life is crippling! They should call you "the Crippling Loose Cannon"
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Old 07-01-2004, 01:42 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Loose Cannon

---Scott Hall spotted crossing a street with Kevin Nash: Possible NWO REFORMATION- CLICK HERE.

LMAO


but seriously, those ads under wrestling columns are friggin ridiculous
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Old 07-01-2004, 05:30 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Savior
I thought cade was the good one in the tag team? oh man my life is crippling! They should call you "the Crippling Loose Cannon"
Nope Cade isnt the good one in the tag te....
umm..hmmm, who is the good one in the tag team?

;-)
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Old 07-01-2004, 07:21 AM   #11
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Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Splaya got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)
My sources tell me this thread is golden
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Old 07-01-2004, 07:29 AM   #12
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Old 07-01-2004, 10:52 AM   #13
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LOL, good stuff as usual LC...
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Old 07-01-2004, 11:35 AM   #14
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Ditto
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Old 07-01-2004, 12:06 PM   #15
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LMAO


but seriously, those ads under wrestling columns are friggin ridiculous
Agreed, that's just genius.
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Old 07-01-2004, 12:15 PM   #16
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It's called advertising.
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Old 07-01-2004, 01:11 PM   #17
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You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Loose Cannon again.


Make this your column.
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Old 07-01-2004, 01:21 PM   #18
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Thanks for the kind words guys. I would make this a column, but I already sent Trips one. Maybe I'll send this one too though.
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Old 07-01-2004, 02:34 PM   #19
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Damn that was some funny shit. Too bad I have to spread more rep around. Keep up the awesome stuff, LC.
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Old 07-02-2004, 03:25 AM   #20
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Nowhere Man got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Nowhere Man got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Nowhere Man got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Nowhere Man got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Nowhere Man got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Nowhere Man got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Nowhere Man got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Nowhere Man got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Nowhere Man got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Nowhere Man got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Nowhere Man got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)Nowhere Man got the bus to Rep Town and repped it up real bad at the rep shop (100,000+)
LC, have I ever told you that you are my second-favorite poster on these boards?
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Old 07-02-2004, 12:22 PM   #21
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Old 07-02-2004, 12:37 PM   #22
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god dammit Disturbed, you will laugh at my jokes. Like this
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Old 07-02-2004, 12:44 PM   #23
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Old 07-02-2004, 12:48 PM   #24
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'Loose Report'

clever name, if it's anything you know how to do, it's being loose.

...what?




ps. nice one
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