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08-03-2004, 04:28 PM
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#1 |
Posts: 18,357
  
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WWE RAW Captions [8-2-2004]
                                  
Last edited by Corkscrewed; 08-03-2004 at 04:49 PM. |
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08-03-2004, 04:29 PM
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#2 |
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Inno Knows.
Posts: 43,710
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only one diva search pic, excellent
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08-03-2004, 04:41 PM
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#3 |
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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Here is the 18th picture, which for some reason, is not showing up.
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08-03-2004, 04:46 PM
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#4 |
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TPWW's HHH Mark Since '04
Posts: 29,886
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Damn, did i sleep through the RAW i should have stayed up for?
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08-03-2004, 05:00 PM
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#5 |
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Incoming Text
Posts: 2,646
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Somewhere in the back, the Hurricane laughed. The laxatives he put in Hunters drink were starting to take effect. And the Diva contestant who gets to spend the night with Jonathan Coachman is.......... La Resistance made the mistake of paying nine dollars to see "The Village". Yes, Lita even botches kissing. YES I GOT IT FIRST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Tomko froze. He thought he had killed the man, but apparently, he had been wrong. How had he survived that avalanche? Tomko didn't know, but one thing was for sure: RC Cola man was back for revenge. You know the WWE doesn't pay their cameramen well when they start jacking off to divas in the middle of the audience. Edge hesitated. He'd never cut off another man's arm before; he wasn't to sure what to do next. After a swift punch to the stomach, Edge spewed out the ten foot pole he'd swallowed earlier. Bischoff(thinking):Damn, that really is one big ass nose. Kane wasn't really too sure how to do the Heimlich maneuver, so he went on instinct. The more Batista danced, the wider Jericho's eyes got. This meant WAR. |
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08-03-2004, 05:03 PM
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#6 |
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Posts: 18,357
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Triple H was PISSED when he found out someone stole his cream filling. OR The first-ever Evolution vocal percussions concert was a huge bust. Coach: "So Trips says Steph screams like a banshee every time he's pumping away, and I've always wondered what that sounded like, so, um, Camille, can you scream for me?" Rob's glory leap into the endzone was foiled when Rhyno and Tajiri slammed him down just one inch from a touchdown. OR Tajiri and Rhyno didn't like their new roles as Invisible Crucifix raisers, but orders were orders. OR When Hunter caught Rob screwing up his pose, he froze him with his Freeze Ray. Two random jobbers were then ordered to take him away. Seconds later, Tajiri discovered he should have believed Rob when he said he used to hang out with Tub Girl. "Merde! The Germans are coming!!" As they finished their kiss, Matt stepped back with the satisfaction of knowing Lita didn't botch it this time... until he realized his tongue was gone. "That'll teach you to drink Pepsi or Coke, BITCH!" Seconds later, every pedophilic WWE fan spontaneously exploded. OR On this night, Steven Richards affirmed his title of Guy Who Can Make Girls Get into ANY Position. "Oh Stevie! I didn't know you liked your gals tied and hung up!" Tomko: "RC COLA SUCKS!!!" The universe suddenly went screwy when Trish and Edge switched bodies. Despite his epiphany a few weeks ago, instinct took over when Jericho tried to get to know him and Edge responded with violence. Edge's new gravity boots could go a little haywire sometimes. Hunter's thigh liposuction procedure was going smoothly until the doctor revealed himself to be William Regal and started beating the crap out of him. That was the last time Triple H got Regal confused with Angle. OR Regal: "MY SINGLET ISN'T GAY!!! IT'S BRITISH!!!" Triple H (talking while dreaming): "Mmmm mmmm... yeah Shawn... stick it in... mmmmm..." Regal was incensed when the blind date HHH set him up with ended being Carrie. It was a said day when Regal OD'ed on Evolution Kool-Aid. Regal wanted to respond to HHH's taunts, but curse that botox injection he'd gotten that morning! Triple H shocked the world by revealing his penis was actually a black leather band watch. Bischoff: "Look, man, I know you lost all of your money in my casino reality show, but you're taking it a bit rough..." For a former dentist, Kane sure did have bad breath... OR Things got downright bizarre when Imhotep was introduced into the Lita angle. When Kane came stomping with a vengeance, Billy Blanks knew he shouldn't have included that "Lose weight or you can beat me up" guarantee. Things weren't pretty when the spirit of Triple H infested Kane. "And THAT's for copying my bald hairstyle and looking like me so the fans get confused and cheer you as well!!!" Trapped in the figure four, Benoit calls for backup in the form of a comet strike from the cheap seats. Even Edge was grossed out to the point of unconsciousness when Flair showed him the second head growing from his left shoulder. Earl: "Ah crap... how the hell am I gonna limbo under THAT?" Benoit: "For the last time! Which one's more effective, Sharpshooter or Figure Four?" Batista: "Flair says Figure Four. I'm sticking with it!" Benoit: "In the name of Bret Hart, WRONG ANSWER!!!" Flair: "Oh hey! THERE'RE my contacts!" The double flying headbutt by Benoit and the streaking comet was a sight to behold. Jericho solidified his heel turn when he kicked Edge over the abyss and into midcard hell. It was an amazing set of manevuers: Flair low blowed Chris, Randy gave him the RKO, AND he took out Steven Richards at the same time!!! Hebner had the little ant trapped. Now, if only he could call for backup... "I knew having Loose Cannon bribe the ref with a quarter million dollars was a good idea!" OW! That doesn't sound like the ocean at all!!! OR Realizing he'd gotten less attention than Maven as champ over these few months, Benoit just broke down. |
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08-03-2004, 05:36 PM
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#7 |
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Spammy Certified
Posts: 46,111
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HHH: Vot Jews going to do, ven Hitlermania runs vild on you?! Even wrestlers fall aslleep during a Flair match. *Fart noise* |
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08-03-2004, 06:27 PM
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#8 |
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not gayo
Posts: 7,676
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HHH: *singing* "We're not gonna take it, NOO, we ain't gonna take it, we're not gonna take it, anymooooooooore" Lillian Garcia was convinced that her implants were a good idea as The Coach slowly caressed her arm. Tajiri: Rhyno, not again? Now we have to carry this fucker around all day. Rhyno: Hey man, I thought I was immune to my own glue. The rumours were true that Conway indeed had a third leg. The WWE was running low on ideas when Matt Morgan and Val Venis became the new Quebec team. Lita: Matt, your braces got caught in my lip again. Matt: Ohhh Lita! Lita: *muffled* Seriously Matt, if you don't stop, my mouth is going to be too sore for tonight. *Matt stops instantly* Tomko: Oh God, don't tell me you did it for The Rock? But he always calls you the Hamburglar! Not a caption, but is there anyone here that wouldn't fuck Stacy?  Stacy: Really Officers, I'm not 14 years old! But sadly yes, I did have sex with David Flair. Lock me up. Tomko's favourite movie was Bloodsport, so he just had to copy Van Damme's consecutive kicks when he got the chance. The writers wanted to make Trish seem tougher, so they photoshopped a trucker hat on her head. Edge: But Chris, please take a seat, let's try to work things out. Jericho: I'm not listeniiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing. Edge: You only have one ear covered, idiot. Jericho: The Diva Search gets bigger pops than you. Edge: That was low, dude. Jericho: Sorry man!!! *they hug afterwards* Edge's new sword swallowing gimmick was destined to fail when he began to eat the swords backwards. HHH: I can't find the whole where the secret button is hidden. Regal: Don't worry sunshine, I sure found the right hole. *Regal takes out his member* HHH: I guess this is payback?  HHH: So THIS is how Steph feels all the time. Hunter became so exhausted after ripping out part of a rotary phone that he just needed to lie down. Kurt Angle's rival from the 1996 Olympics was back with a vengeance. Sadly, he didn't learn his lesson back then, so Kurt took him to school again. HHH: You think anyone even cares about the Olympics anymore? Bahaha. Olympian: But... doing it for my country... WWE is fake... HHH: Just like my wife's rack, but you should see how I- Olympian: Just smash me with the hammer, please! Hunter heard that women dug black guys cocks, but this was just ridiculous. Eric: Hello, stranger. HHH: You looked over when we were taking a piss Eric; you broke the guy's code. Eric: But... WHY WAS IT BLACK? HHH:  Lita didn't know what she was getting into when she played the 'smell my last meal from my burp' game with Kane. Lita: Oh God, you really do eat pieces of shit for breakfast! Kane: Go back to Hollywood, we don't need you around here! Maven: But I'm not him! Kane: LIES! Who's walking tall now? Maven: NOOOOOOOOOOO Kane: Oh, and Johnny Bravo is going to suck! Meng's newest Ref costume was sure to fool Benoit as he snuck in for the Tongan Death Grip. Flair: Oooooooooh, but I really have to GO! Just let me pin you, Edge. Edge: NO, you were supposed to wear your Depends like HHH said! The Ref hated bullies, but he could only watch as Orton crouched behind Jericho while Richards pushed him. Benoit: Your little Randy Orton cutout was no match for my superb wit, Batista! Now TAP!!! Ref: So tell me Flair, what do you have to say after I proved that Bret Hart and Mick Foley were both better than you? Flair: Err.... umm..... WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Benoit was already travelling towards the light after hearing rumours that Orton was going to kill his career at Summerslam. Jericho was shocked than Tony Danza had showed up after hearing all of the captions about him. Worst. Double team move. Ever. Ref: It doesn't really look like a diamond, what the hell was Page talking about? Orton: Not now, Earl! Orton: You all know that I'm gonna get a piece from Carmella. Yeah, you don't have to tell me, I know, I'm the man  Benoit: That stupid toothfairy didnt have to glue the money to my pillow! I'll never lose a tooth again! 
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08-03-2004, 06:47 PM
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#9 | |
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Posts: 18,357
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Quote:
 Triple H's black cock was priceless! 
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08-03-2004, 07:05 PM
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#10 | |
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not gayo
Posts: 7,676
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Quote:
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08-03-2004, 07:07 PM
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#11 | |
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not gayo
Posts: 7,676
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Quote:
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08-03-2004, 11:43 PM
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#12 |
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Inno Knows.
Posts: 43,710
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HHH really needed to take Orton up on his high fiber diet Coach: My what big boobs you have! Camille: The better to feed you with Extreme Crucifix Wranglers fuck that sucked The ref saw his opportunity to end La Resistance once and for all... When did Chris Pontius debut? Matt: I love you Lita Lita: I love you Jeff...Kane...Shane...Matt, yeah that's it Ritalin Man makes his debut to the shagrin of Tyson "ADD" Tomko It was at this moment where Assman hit puberty... Cleavage shots, THEY'RE BACK BABY! Kane: KANE HUNGRY! |
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08-03-2004, 11:44 PM
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#13 |
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Inno Knows.
Posts: 43,710
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Kane: I DID NOT LOSE TO BENOIT! I WAS DRUNK! |
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08-03-2004, 11:48 PM
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#14 |
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Spammy Certified
Posts: 46,111
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08-04-2004, 04:35 AM
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#15 |
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As over as Crystal Pepsi
Posts: 21,639
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Caption time!
In the back Rhyno and Shane were laughing their asses off… All Shane had to do was tell Triple H to make love to the microphone, and Rhyno took care of the rest… Coach: You know, it’s true. Gentlemen really do prefer blondes… But where the hell is Carmella? I’m no gentleman! Get all this crazy action and more on “When Invisible Crucifixes F*** Up”! Order now with your Visa or MasterCard and receive “The Best Of Glass Ceiling Bloopers” at no additional cost! Some may argue that Tajiri’s powerbomb was a little stiff… But if you had to hear anyone sing “We’re Not The Mounties” on a 3 hour car ride you’d get your revenge also. Rob: They’re getting WHO to play the lead role in the Green Lantern movie?!?!?! Moment later Matt Hardy understands the lyrics to “Dude Looks Like A Lady.” JOEY RADD TO THE RESCUE!!! Not a caption, but seriously… Look at that one fan standing up in the crowd… The dude with his arms up… I bet he has never been laid… He is now Virgin Joe! It doesn’t take that much physical work to do a cartwheel. The true reason for Virgin Joe’s standing ovation is for Stacy that took a lot of mental work… The whole “doing something and breathing” thing is hard. Thankfully Rosey got in the way of the goose step before we had Bradshaw V 2.0 on Raw. Oh that naughty Steven Richards!  Jericho: Woah… I’m seeing colors in the ring… Did I hang out with RVD too much? Edge: No, we’re doing the high light reel, and the anti-push drugs that Triple H puts in your milk are kicking in. Edge didn’t believe Chris when he said that the hot sauce will knock him on his ass. Regal: Remember when you jobbed to Henry Godwin? Or the Warrior? When you weren’t the top guy? You remember that, sunshine!?!?! HHH: STOP IT! STOP IT! I DON’T WANNA HEAR IT!!! I’M TELLING VINNIEEEEEE!!! King: The worst part about this is the fact that the fans can’t hear us and this is some good time to do some commentary… So, Jim, how is everything? JR: BAHGAWDSTUNNERBROKEHIMINHALFNOSELLBBQCARNAGE!!!! “Okay Regal… You Win… Ed, Edd, and Eddie is better than Dexter’s Lab….” If he couldn’t get out of the glass ceiling with his bear hands, then he’d use the brass knuckles to break it! After being reminded that his initials are not “H, H, H”, William took his life into his own hands instead of taking the de-push from hell. HHH: I’m not taking back what Is aid about Dexter’s Lab, but DeDe is cooler than Plank! Regal: You bloody fool! Plank is a genius! Triple H doesn’t care where he’ll be when his diarrhea acts up. Eric: Holy Crap Hunter! What happened to you!?!?! HHH: Steph’s time of the month…. Kane: For the last time, OPEN WIDE!!! Lita: Is this wide enough. Dr. Yankem? Kane: You’re not even opening your mouth! Lita: Oh! My mouth! Maven: Oh No! There goes my credibility! Kane: Like you even had any. “You see this? You see Maven right here? This is what happens when you don’t floss!” Ric: Say it Chris! Benoit: Never! Ric: Just say it! Benoit: But Vince screwed him! Bret did not screw Bret! Yep, the WWE is desperate to find a new man to do the People’s Elbow. The ref was a little hesitant to participate in the Extreme Limbo competition. Batisita: BUT I DON’T WANNA GET MY HAIR CUT!!! Ric Flair… another victim of the “I Swear The Fish Was This Big” story. Periodically God will stop by to make sure that Benoit isn’t getting de-pushed. When you seriously cannot come up with a decent caption, the following phrase will do. “YOU’RE A HOMO!!!!” People questioned Randy’s sexuality when he decided to run up to feel how smooth Chris Benoit’s hair is. See! LC isn’t the only man to bow down to Orton! “I know that there are a lot of people over in the back that think I haven’t paid my dues, but oh, how I love my laptop… the internet community will always reassure me that I am indeed a credible wrestler!” “OWWWW!!! Damn it! There was a huge hermit crab in that shell!!!!” And this is the last time that Lita borrows lip gloss from Rhyno. “Oh Lucy, that’s how you do it! Oh yeah! Work my cannon, work it!” Last edited by FourFifty; 08-04-2004 at 05:49 AM. |
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08-04-2004, 04:51 AM
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#16 |
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As over as Crystal Pepsi
Posts: 21,639
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Lita: Is that a roll of quarters in your pocket that’s poking my hip? Matt: Funny, I was about to ask you the same thing. |
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08-04-2004, 02:58 PM
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#17 | |
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not gayo
Posts: 7,676
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Quote:
Good stuff |
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Linear Mode
