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Old 06-12-2005, 07:57 AM   #1
Drakul
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Smackdown Captions 9th June 2005
































--------------------------
Looks like captioning gold to me.Sorry if this is already posted.
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Old 06-12-2005, 09:21 AM   #2
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Benoit still found people slipping on banana peels funny









Stevie Richards Returns.......with a vengeance


Kurt realised he shouldn't have listened to lita advice


Kurt takes a table match to a new level

or

Kurt can carry anything to a good match
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Old 06-12-2005, 10:00 AM   #3
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Benoit thinking to himself: "Finally i'm off the HHH show, er..I mean Raw"
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Old 06-12-2005, 10:16 AM   #4
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Booker(realising he's lifted his leg up too far): "Ouch! That's gonna hurt tomorrow"




Kurt must be obsessed with Lita aswell, he's obviously learning from her.



"That's for hitting me in the face earlier!"
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Old 06-12-2005, 10:31 AM   #5
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GET OFF MAH LAWN!


Heidy: I like girls with boobies now!!!


Eddie: And now as proof of how serious I am... I shall now devour this microphone on live TV.


Booker slaps Angle with his Air Penis.


Angle: Hee hee! You can't see me!


Rhyno wonders whether there are any flowerpots nearby.


Taz found a new job... as part of the mafia.
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Old 06-12-2005, 12:02 PM   #6
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Benoit: The glass....its gone!

"I'm crazy chair head gimme some candy!"

Kurt: Where are you stevie!
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Old 06-12-2005, 12:03 PM   #7
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white guy behind him: Oh shit thats kurt!
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Old 06-12-2005, 02:03 PM   #8
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For some reason I find all these captions hilarious that everyone did above



Tazz displays his new "Thug Doctor" gimmick



Rhyno started to suspicously exit Wal-Mart when the alarm went off and Spider Man started to lock onto him.



Tazz botches throwing up



Tazz: Kurt Kurt! You are a bubblybobobunny! Peekaboo! I see you! bababab!
Angle: (To himself) Stupid



No Triple H? Benoit must be in heaven.



We are the bears, the shufflin crew
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Old 06-12-2005, 02:14 PM   #9
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Kurt Desperately tries to save Chris Benoit after JBL's ass collapsed, forming a black hole in the middle of the ring.

or

Kurt could only scream in horror as JBL and Benoit were sucked under the ring into midcard hell.
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Old 06-12-2005, 02:43 PM   #10
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Liking Rhyno's new tat on his elbow. Why the hell did they fire him for christ sake
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Old 06-12-2005, 03:23 PM   #11
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Benoit was finally on SmackDown, where the "T" at the end of his first name is not exactly a typo.



This was the wrong time for Benoit to do his patinent Sycho Sid Wrestlemania 13 impression.


JBL: You two, meet me in room 769 after the show.



When the phtographer hoped this was a three-man orgy, he was determined to buy so much more than stocks from JBL.


JBL: He's MY Chrisie. MINE, MINE, ALL MINE!! GET YER OWN!!


Hot suckling action!


Carlito falls from the glass celing, even when Haas was trying to save him.


HEIDENREICH [READING A POEM]: This girl is too cute, and if you're good, she'll show you some goodies. I just want to say to her, "YOU HAVE VERY NICE BOOBIES!!"


Michael Cole had to be wishing that he was kidnapped by Hidenreich once more while he had that girl.




Hey, Angle had to do something to stop the second coming of Katie Vick.



ANGLE: I have a career, what the hell am I doing?


ANGLE: Admit it Tazz. Everytime you watch my matches, you're doing something behind that little desk of yours. Tell us all about your life of leasure.


ANGLE: I have a sexy bod! I have a nice bod! Look at my bod!
TAZZ: That's nice...but you're not Cole.



Learn from Tazz, everyone. Watching the best of JR and the King will give you a bleeding headache, as well.


Ladies and gemtlemen, we give to you, the glass celing class of 2003.


If you thought what the Sandman was smoking was bad, you should see what he gave Cole to smoke right before this was taken.


DREAMER: You gave Michael Cole a blunt, but not me, Sandman? How dare you?



Kurt Angle does his Hulk Hogan impersination.
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Old 06-12-2005, 03:36 PM   #12
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Angle: "Oh, Christ. There's only one way to put an end to this whole beastiality sex angle!"

*conk*



"I'm Kurt S. Angle Esquire."
"And I'm Booker T Logan."
"Together we are ... WYLD STALLYNS!!!"


All things considered, Sharmell reflected on the fact that being Kurt's bitch was far more preferable than being the bitch to the Artist Formerly Known as Prince Iaukea.


After looking at the Titantron, Tazz came to the sudden realization that the'd bought the worst fro wig ever.



Dreamer cursed himself for not having realized it before. Vince had never signed Sandman for "One Night Stand", but had instead replaced him with a cardboard cutout!


Heidenreich: "That's right, people! The winners of this year's Raw Diva search will get the honor of serving as official Smackdown ring posts! Woo!"
Last edited by El Santo; 06-12-2005 at 03:51 PM.
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Old 06-12-2005, 03:54 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Drakul
I'm not captioning or anything, but am I the only one that thinks Kurt's face looks hilarious in this picture? Especially if you picture him as if that's his normal face. And imagine him with that face constant, but he's dancing around.
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Old 06-12-2005, 03:58 PM   #14
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Angle is taking the "Eugene" gimmick further as he is now a wrestler with Down's syndrome.
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Old 06-12-2005, 07:05 PM   #15
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I just farted and it fucking reeks



I concur, your fart stinks.
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Old 06-12-2005, 07:57 PM   #16
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Your Hero Has Returned!!!! for one night only...




BENOIT: "Light puffy clouds... bright glow luminosity... a match in the main event... this must be heaven!"
WRITER: (offstage) "In two weeks, Angle's gonna be making sexual advances towards your wife."
BENOIT: "DAMMIT!"


BENOIT: "And what's more, Martha told me she's kicking your ass for giving her advice on that ImClone stock."
JBL:


Chris Benoit, the "Constipated Wolverine" wasn't exactly a brilliant success.


It had been a while since Benoit had done this. His vase skills were rusty.


JBL looked on with uncertainty as Benoit went on his approach in the World Carry-Another-Guy-While-You-Limbo Championships.


Angle's new "I'm GONNA EAT YOU" gimmick was met with confusion by everyone except Fat Doug Mendoza, who marked out.


As much as he tried, Bradshaw could never quite get his WOOOO to Ric Flair level.


Carlito takes heel tactics to a new level with his new Tittie Biter.


Good to see SmackDOWN hasn't changed. Falling midcards still the norm.


[Not a caption. Just that the girl's hot. How'd that happen???]


John welcomes the newest SD! diva to the crowd... freshly signed 30 minutes ago when Vince saw her enter the arena.


LONDON: "And this is for trying to draft me into the war in Iraq!!!!"


EDDIE: "At the next PPV, I will carry that Cup of Pudding and destroy it like nothing else. Cup of Pudding, you better watch out, because I will take your LIFE!!!"


Angle and Booker T weren't the best air guitarists in the world. Far from it...


ANGLE: "Look! A penny!"
BOOKER: "Look! HHH turned off gravity again!"


ANGLE: "Wow... this EZ Fold Chair stuff is harder than it looks..."


"Look at the bulge in that Olympic Hero's pants..."


Kurt Angle debuts his new family dad gimmick, complete with sitting on his ass all day doing nothing.


The standoff between Lex Luthor and a newly madeover Sallah was intense to say the least.


It's always heartbreaking to see couples fight like this.


Kurt Angle: So awesome he can make a vicious attack on an announcer's table look devastatingly tragic and emotional.


EMT: "Rough night with Steph?"
TAZZ: "Yeah."


HEYMAN: (thinking) 'As long as Shane and Stephanie don't show up, I retain my sanity. As long as Shane and Stephanie...'


RHYNO: (thinking) 'So if I had fucked Lita first, I'd be getting a main event push instead of picking for scraps. Dammit, why didnt' I betray Matt first??? Stupid stupid stupid..'


Sandman takes "having a stiff woody" to new and unprecedented lengths.


MORGAN: "Man, look at the size of it!"
JBL: "It's huge!"
DOUG: "I've never seen one like that!"
ANGLE: "It must be THIS big!!!"


"YOU'RE A HOMO!!!"


Not chairshots nor vampires could stop Taz when he was on a mission.


Evidently rusty after so many years off, Tazz botches the Heimlich Maneuver.


Group Hug: Dudley Style.


"Why the hell didn't you show us these warning signs about our careers when we joined the company four years ago???


Tazz's Harpie Shriek: still the best in the business.
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Old 06-12-2005, 08:37 PM   #17
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Benoit: So THIS is what it's like above the glass ceiling?
HHH: [from afar] Don't count on it...


JBL: WHAT! What do you MEAN I'm a peanut-head?
Long: I think he means ME, playa!


CONSTIPATEDFACEAAAAUUUGGGHHHH!!!


JBL: I wowna touch yer manly boobs, son.
Benoit: Go right ahead.


Benoit: Get off that invisible crucifix! It's MINE!!!


Cool: Suck your boobies? That's not coo--UUMMFFFOFMFMFMMEMRMRMFMFFFFMMMRRFFMMR!!!


Today, the X-Pac Sucknig Machine claimed another victim. Carlito Caribbean Cool, you'll always be in our hearts, in our minds, and in our stomachs.


Heidenreich: I finally realized puberty was better,
When I saw this woman cheering.
So I brought her up into the ring,
And the pain in my tights is searing!


Continued: She's mah new friiiend now, we'll have some fun,
This chick is very endearing.
And when she jumps, up and down,
My eyes, they start tearing.


Booker T: PARTY TIME! EXCELLENT!
Kurt Angle: Deeeerrrr, pork chop sandwiches!!!


Booker's impression of a Rockette made Kurt sicker than ever...


Lita's Wrestling School - Weapons 101

In this course you will learn everything you need to know about using international objects during wrestling matches, the proper way to utilize them, and the effects and consequences they will have on your match.

Credits: 1.00
Length: 10 weeks


"Maybe I should take that course. It seems like a great addition to my curriculum."


Tazz: Kurt honey, I didn't mean it! I swear! Honest! I ran outta gas! I had a flat tire! I didn't have enough money for cab fare! My tux didn't come back from the cleaners! An old friend came in from outta town! Someone stole my car! There was an earthquake, a terrible flood, locusts! It wasn't my fault, I swear to God!!!



EMT: Did...did the table make it?
Tazz: I tried everything I could. I'm sorry.


EXTREME POWER WALLKING!!!


Sandman: This stick is mine. You can't have it.


Dreamer: I WILL have that stick. Oh yes...it will be mine...


Angle: Thank you! GOOD NIGHT!!


Kurt: No, YOU, my friend, are the homo!
Morgan: Oooh! B-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-bbbbbpppppppflflfffflflflflflflfffffffllll--
Basham: Burn?
Morgan: GGAAAAAHHH!!!!!


Tazz locks on the Silly Face Chokelock.


Bubba: I get his upper half!
D-Von: Fine, I get his legs then!
Jones: MMMRRFFMFMMRMRR!!!


Dreamer: Hee hee! His chair says BALLS! [snicker]


Benoit: Do the sheep thing again. Go on, do it.
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Old 06-12-2005, 08:48 PM   #18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TerranRich

JBL: WHAT! What do you MEAN I'm a peanut-head?
Long: I think he means ME, playa!


Heidenreich: I finally realized puberty was better,
When I saw this woman cheering.
So I brought her up into the ring,
And the pain in my tights is searing!


Continued: She's mah new friiiend now, we'll have some fun,
This chick is very endearing.
And when she jumps, up and down,
My eyes, they start tearing.


Booker T: PARTY TIME! EXCELLENT!
Kurt Angle: Deeeerrrr, pork chop sandwiches!!!


Tazz: Kurt honey, I didn't mean it! I swear! Honest! I ran outta gas! I had a flat tire! I didn't have enough money for cab fare! My tux didn't come back from the cleaners! An old friend came in from outta town! Someone stole my car! There was an earthquake, a terrible flood, locusts! It wasn't my fault, I swear to God!!!


Sandman: This stick is mine. You can't have it.


Dreamer: I WILL have that stick. Oh yes...it will be mine...
Muhuhahahahah...
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Old 06-12-2005, 11:23 PM   #19
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Benoit: JBL... now is the time to tell you... I love you man...
(Benoit dies)
JBL: Noooooo!


(Angle screams like a zombie)
Angle: Help me.
Booker: Don't touch me man!



We're the newest boyband sensation, The SmackDown! Kids!

Dumb, idiotic I know. Feel free to harshly rep me down.
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Old 06-12-2005, 11:28 PM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Corkscrewed


EDDIE: "At the next PPV, I will carry that Cup of Pudding and destroy it like nothing else. Cup of Pudding, you better watch out, because I will take your LIFE!!!"


The cup of pudding is part of the glass celing, though. You know that, right?
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Old 06-14-2005, 12:27 AM   #21
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*shrug* Smarks will be happy then when Eddie destroys it...
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Old 06-14-2005, 12:32 AM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Corkscrewed
*shrug* Smarks will be happy then when Eddie destroys it...
Exactly....but the pudding DOES have his fan base...mainly those who are fans of Bill Cosby. So it can't disappoint them.
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