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Old 11-17-2005, 08:49 AM   #1
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Kurt Angle

The Right Bower: Killing Yourself to Live

by: Jay Bower
on: 11/17/2005 2:58 am est

On August 29th of 1985, a typical American man was hard at work on a construction site in rural Pennsylvania, perched high in the air like a bird. It was a typical summer afternoon, and with autumn drawing near he was looking forward to the relief those months would bring.

Unfortunately, for some people, the autumn never comes.

In life, a fraction of a second can ripple for eternity. He knew that he had lost balance, but he didn't have time to think about it. He was crashing to the ground. His head hit concrete first. Both of his shoulders broke instantly. His skull was cracked in three places. Lesser things would have killed any other man, but not him. He picked his broken body off the ground and began the longest walk of his life. When he arrived, he checked himself into the hospital.

No one could ever tell him that he wasn't tough. And no one could ever tell him that he wasn't determined.

On August 31st, two days later, the man was pronounced dead in the same hospital.

David Angle was 55 years old, and he couldn't take his pride with him.

Twenty-four hours later, his son Kurt wasn't listening to those who were telling him not to play in the varsity football game that afternoon. Kurt thrived to overcome all things, even his father's death. Sixteen solo tackles, two touchdowns and one interception later, Kurt walked off the field after the best football game that he would ever play, feeling proud.

Little did Kurt know that he would some day be carrying his own broken body to the hospital, and positioning himself to follow in his father's footsteps of living proud, and regretfully probably dying young.

"I just wanted to talk a little bit about him, and what he meant to me. When he was on, he was the best wrestler in the business. He may have even been the best ever. He showed me a lot of things, and said a lot of things that not only helped me professionally, but personally. He cared about everybody, he loved everybody. I love you, and I'll miss you".

Kurt Angle made these comments, fighting back tears, in the wake of Eddie Guerrero's tragic death. Sadly, these comments aren't that different than those that could made about Angle himself one emotional Monday evening if he doesn't make make a drastic change immediately.

Less than eight hours after Vince McMahon and Chavo Guerrero addressed the media at a press conference in Minneapolis in regards to Guerrero's death, a broken down Kurt Angle landed on his head after taking one of the most dangerous offensive maneuvers of his career from the top rope. Like his father, Angle is tough, determined and proud. Like his former mentor and fellow Olympic medallist David Schultz, Angle is tough, determined and proud. At 36 years old, there is a good chance Kurt Angle can outlive his mentor Schultz, who was murdered in 1996 at the age of 37. At the rate Kurt Angle is going, outliving his father may be his toughest battle to date.

His checklist reads like an almanac of worst case scenarios. Nerve damage to his face. Six knee surgeries. A broken neck. Torn muscles. Bone chips removed from his upper spine. Destroyed ligaments. Dislocated shoulders. Several years ago, Angle said to the press with pride, "Look at my face. It looks like I have aged fifteen years in the last five." Angle can no longer hear out of his left ear. It has been drained 80 times.

When training for the Olympics, Kurt Angle pushed his body to the point of insanity. "I'd train so ferociously some days that I would make myself sick". That training makes getting out of bed today even difficult according to Angle, as he broke his body down at a very young age.

Five months before the 1996 Olympics, Kurt Angle cracked two vertebrae and pulled four muscles in his back, causing two herniated discs to stab into his spinal cord. The pain was intense. Doctors told him that he risked paralysis competing, but Kurt was proud. Mepivacaine was the painkiller that Kurt Angle chose, and for the next half of a year he took it constantly to make training, and eventually winning a gold medal possible. Hunched over in tears, Angle had defied paralysis and proved himself as the best amateur wrestler in the world. He wished his father would have been there to see it.

Nine years later, Kurt was in his fourth as a WWE wrestler. In an eerily similar scenario, Kurt Angle's neck was destroyed in early 2003, and he was advised not to compete in the main event of Wrestlemania 19. Maybe it was the backflip that he attempted from the top of a steel cage, fifteen feet in the air on January 14th of that year. It was a move that could end a career if the slightest thing went wrong, but in the all-or-nothing fashion typical to Angle, he went big. The result was the most graceful moonsault imaginable, and as Kurt hung upside down in the air high above the arena, time seemed to stand still for just an instant before his knees hit the mat in a landing that could not have been any more perfect. Angle had wagered his body for glory, and come out on top yet again.

But how long could he keep getting lucky? He was willing to roll the dice one more time at Wrestlemania of that year, deciding to step into the ring and face Brock Lesnar in a match that would solidify his legacy, or paralyze him for life. Angle not only stared down death, but taunted it, taking dangerous drops on his neck and shoulders before passing the World Championship to Brock Lesnar. The 54,097 fans in attendance roared in approval of Kurt flying around the ring. Kurt's wife Karen and newborn daughter Kyra probably had different reactions.

For 240 days a year, Kurt Angle wakes up in a bed that doesn't belong to him. In hotel rooms all over America, Canada, Japan and Europe. His Coraopolis, Pennsylvania home, his BMW and his family are things he seldom has the time to see. Several years ago he stated in an interview that the only way he could continue to wrestle was through the heavy use of painkillers. In 2005, Kurt Angle is going harder than ever.

In an interview with Kurt Angle and his wife Karen several years ago, Angle stated that the only time he ever physically felt 100% was right before a match when his adrenaline took over. Kurt continued "But after that, I'm right back down to the bottom again. It sucks, because if I want to play with Kyra... (Kurt looks to his daughter playing in the next room)...sometimes I just can't do it".

Karen Angle spoke: "If he gets to the point where he really can't play with her, that will be it. No matter what you have in your house, no matter how good your life is, you can't give that up. If that's what happens, that's when I'll put my foot down and make him stop."

At that moment, Kurt Angle smiled, "I'll never stop" he finished.

Kurt Angle's marriage ended several months ago, devastating him personally. He is a proud man, and wrestling is something that he is dedicated to, and excellence is his obsession. Tired of wondering if he would be in a wheelchair in a few years, as Karen Angle has publicly wondered, she opted to separate from Kurt over the summer, and their marriage never made it to the autumn.

Kurt Angle has made it clear in the past that he will settle for nothing less than being remembered as the best of all time. But is that distinction worth his life? To Kurt, a proud man like his father, it might very well be.

Kurt's physical changes over the past half-decade are shocking. His head has increased in size dramatically, which may or may not point to use of Human Growth Hormone. Angle has suffered concussions, and has major nerve damage as a result of his neck problems. His triceps appear to be on the verge of atrophy, and one of Angle's biceps is noticeably larger than the other. Kurt Angle has a history of heart disease in his family. He has a glassy look in his eyes, and is a self-admitted user of painkillers. And he shows no signs of slowing down. As a training partner once said of Kurt Angle, "He doesn't have an off switch".

Estranged from his family, Kurt Angle is said to be more focused on being the best in wrestling than he ever has been. But how many times can Kurt Angle keep rolling the dice before his luck runs out? I don't know if World Wrestling Entertainment can continue to allow him to try.

Kurt Angle doesn't need wrestling. He has made millions and has nothing left to prove, at least not to his fans. He could stay another few years, maybe end up with permanent damage to 10% of his brain like his idol Bret Hart. Or he could move on with is life, make a new career out of motivational speaking, acting. Maybe amatuer wrestling seminars.

Kurt Angle has proven in the past that pride is more important to him than anything however. It has cost him his health, it has cost him his family, and at the rate he is going, sooner rather than later, he too may find himself dragging his dying body to the hospital when doctors can no longer help, and his pride may cost him his life. Sadly, it may already have. And Kurt won't be able to take his pride with him either.

The person most qualified to speak, Kurt's long time wife Karen, spoke best when she said, "I don't think what he's doing to himself is worth it".

Neither do I.



With the thread on a WWE wrestler being on a "deathwatch" and from reading this, I'm leanng towards Angle. I never realized just how bad Angle's body was, it's scary.


And to everyone, no matter what religion you are, remember that only one is right- so lets have a war!
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Old 11-17-2005, 08:50 AM   #2
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And you couldn't say this in the deathwatch thread itself because?
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Old 11-17-2005, 08:52 AM   #3
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Old 11-17-2005, 08:54 AM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dave Youell
And you couldn't say this in the deathwatch thread itself because?
Sorry.
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Old 11-17-2005, 08:55 AM   #5
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Originally Posted by Morgan
Sorry.
No Probs, now you know
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Old 11-17-2005, 09:30 AM   #6
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Hmmmm...LEt's not jump to conclusions.

So...Anyone else wanna see Kurt retire after that one?
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Old 11-17-2005, 09:32 AM   #7
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If that was true, imagine how it would seem for Angle:

There's people in the company keeping an eye on you because they think you're close to death...
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Old 11-17-2005, 02:11 PM   #8
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As much as I hate to say this, I believe that Angle would be near the top of the list as one of the next guys to go. I got a chance to read his book, and he talks about all the numerous injuries he's gotten during the olympics. And now he's had almost 6 years of WWE bumps and injuries, including a temporary neck surgery which only kept him out 3 months. For his sake, I hope he gets help soon.
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Old 11-17-2005, 02:48 PM   #9
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Very. Scary. Stuff.

There's a certain admiration you have for people who literally push themselves to the brink and give themselves to their work. But at the same time, you DO have to ask: is it worth it?

Probably not. I don't want to see another wrestler go down like that.
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Old 11-17-2005, 03:08 PM   #10
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angle gives us 110% and he deserves all the credit he gets in his lifetime bar none
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Old 11-17-2005, 03:13 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Corkscrewed
Very. Scary. Stuff.

There's a certain admiration you have for people who literally push themselves to the brink and give themselves to their work. But at the same time, you DO have to ask: is it worth it?

Probably not. I don't want to see another wrestler go down like that.
In-fucking-deed.

Angle's given us some of the best matches in the history of wrestling (The professional "sport," that is). He's killing himself for a desire that's already been fulfilled. I don't want to see him die for this.
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Old 11-17-2005, 03:28 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kane Knight
In-fucking-deed.

Angle's given us some of the best matches in the history of wrestling (The professional "sport," that is). He's killing himself for a desire that's already been fulfilled. I don't want to see him die for this.
If you know where Kurt came from then you know that desire hasn't been filled. As long as there is one person out there who thinks he isn't the greatest, he wont be happy. Its the way people from Pittsburgh are, they're perfectionist. In Kurt's mind, I can damn near promise you, he isn't fulfilled.
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Old 11-17-2005, 03:32 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Destor
If you know where Kurt came from then you know that desire hasn't been filled. As long as there is one person out there who thinks he isn't the greatest, he wont be happy. Its the way people from Pittsburgh are, they're perfectionist. In Kurt's mind, I can damn near promise you, he isn't fulfilled.
Then he will die for a hollow dream, and that's even more tragic.
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Old 11-17-2005, 03:52 PM   #14
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Ladies and Gentleman, this is the wrestling business.

Sometimes we don't give these guys enough credit. We don't see them bent over in agony, popping pain pills, crying out in pain as they prepare for another show the next night. We don't see them holding back the tears as they talk on the phone to their baby son or daughter who is hundreds of miles away. We don't see them painfully pushing out another rep on the bench press so they can achieve the look which can give them just the slightest chance of stardom. This is what the professional wrestling world is all about, and as much as it is hidden - we all know about it and we all expect it.

So, I'm not saying that you shouldn't feel some sympathy for Kurt Angle. You SHOULD feel some sympathy for Kurt Angle. Sure, he's doing what he wants, but he sacrafices everything...

...but at the same time, you should also take a second to think about the others. The other wrestlers who haven't achieved glory like Kurt Angle has, and the individuals who will push themselves just as much to try attain even the slightest imitation of what he has. In a week where the realities of pro-wrestling have never been more apparent and shocking, feel some sympathy for them all. Even Chris Masters and Hardcore Holly - because as much as you might hate them, you should respect and admire them for the fantastic job they do.
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Old 11-17-2005, 09:30 PM   #15
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It's a hard topic. On one hand, you think "man, this guy is amazing for what he gives." On the other hand, you go "geez, this guy's an idiot for killing himself over what's just a show."

If you really think about it, you can't fault him either way. This is HIS choice, and we'd be silly to judge him for it. Naturally, part of our reactions come from concern, but there's also the part that comes from selfishness: the selfishness of wanting to watch him perform longer. Not that this is necessarily bad; it's just the way people work.

The catch-22 is this: we love him because he's so good, but had he not pushed himself so much, he would not have been so good. We probably have a desire to wrestle for years to come, but that involves having him take time off--a decision that may end up being "take time off... forever (i.e. retiring)." So at what point does the line fall? It's a huge gray matter.

I personally don't think it's worth his life. However, should he work himself to death, I won't criticize him. And at the same time, having now learned of this, if he does pass, I don't think the tears I shed will be as great, because
1. I know it was basically his decision
2. I've expected this.

That last part was just in possible response to some who might question why I would get so worked up on Eddie but not "care" as much for Kurt. The main difference would be in knowledge; I never saw Eddie's passing coming, but if Kurt's story is accurate, then I'll obviously look at him in a new light.

Bottom line for me is that I can only pray that the best possible outcome comes through.
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Old 11-18-2005, 12:38 AM   #16
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If any of this has any truth or merit, then I think Kurt Angle needs to get his head out of his ass. I am not buying that he does it for the people either, and if he does truly do this for the people then he needs to take a step back, re-evaluate everything and come back to reality.

HELL, if he loves people so much then why not do something practical for them instead, like trying to end war or poverty or ending disease?

I think that would be more important than entertaining a bunch of already OVER entertained, fast food eating, tv watching, materialistic, trendy, "Oh look, I'm more interested in being on TV than I am watching the guys in the ring destroying thier bodies" people.
-----------

Unfortunately, it sounds as though the damage has already been done though.
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Old 11-18-2005, 04:09 AM   #17
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If anyone needs to question Kurt's commitment to the WWE, all you need to do is look back at Wrestlemania 19 time. Kurt's neck was injured bad, and he was gonna drop the title a week or 2 before WM. Instead, he put himself in serious jeopardy just to main event Wrestlemania.
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Old 11-18-2005, 04:30 AM   #18
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I really need to stop coming here. God, I am horrbly, horribly, HORRIBLY depressed right now.
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Old 11-18-2005, 06:03 AM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RGWhat316
If anyone needs to question Kurt's commitment to the WWE, all you need to do is look back at Wrestlemania 19 time. Kurt's neck was injured bad, and he was gonna drop the title a week or 2 before WM. Instead, he put himself in serious jeopardy just to main event Wrestlemania.

I think the point that Corky is trying to get at is that it isn't fair for Angle to say he did that for the fans, or even for the WWE. He went into Mania risking paralysis for himself. He wanted to be the best and to be remembered as the greatest, and he realised this was one of the few ways he could do that.
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Old 11-18-2005, 10:19 AM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chavo Classic
I think the point that Corky is trying to get at is that it isn't fair for Angle to say he did that for the fans, or even for the WWE. He went into Mania risking paralysis for himself. He wanted to be the best and to be remembered as the greatest, and he realised this was one of the few ways he could do that.
Yeah, placing his passion on the fans would also place his death or paralysis on the fans, not to mention the injuries he's already sustained on the fans. That's simply not so, as he did this before the WWE.
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Old 11-18-2005, 12:37 PM   #21
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hb2k has a relatively large amount of rep (50,000+)hb2k has a relatively large amount of rep (50,000+)hb2k has a relatively large amount of rep (50,000+)hb2k has a relatively large amount of rep (50,000+)hb2k has a relatively large amount of rep (50,000+)hb2k has a relatively large amount of rep (50,000+)hb2k has a relatively large amount of rep (50,000+)hb2k has a relatively large amount of rep (50,000+)hb2k has a relatively large amount of rep (50,000+)hb2k has a relatively large amount of rep (50,000+)
Angle's said himself that he "likes having good wrestling matches, and likes getting credit for having good wrestling matches". I hope the price of that isn't the ultimate one.
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