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Old 08-24-2007, 01:10 AM   #1
KingofOldSchool
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So I guess Batista is coming out with a book...and it might be a hilarious read.

Quote:
Credit: Wrestling Observer

Those who have seen Batista's book say it's "insane." It's sure to ruffle a few feathers in the WWE locker room. Batista has said time and time again that he's the most boring guy in the world, which sounds like it would make for a lackluster book, but as it turns out, he talks nonstop about who he hates and does not respect in the locker room in his book. This could very well be major trouble in the making since he's hated by most of the locker room as it is. Batista also gives his thoughts on certain creative decisions WWE has made and more. He also talks "almost recklessly" about the number of women he's slept with. It's said to be totally different from all the other WWE books.


"Dear Diary,

It's March 12, 2007. I'm backstage at a house show in Peoria, IL and I'm looking at Paul London and he's looking at me. I don't like Paul London, I think he's trying to take my spot. I see the way he looks at my World Title, him and his stupid facial hair. And you know who else I hate? Michael Cole. He refuses to acknowledge my ever present and massive bulge in my tights. If he doesn't mention it, then how will all of my female fans know to look down there during my matches????? On a side note, I had an epic sexual romp the other day with this fox at the local McDonald's. I went in for a Big Mac and I left with another sexual conquest. Damn, I really am an animal. Ha...ha...ha. *grunts*"



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Old 08-24-2007, 01:32 AM   #2
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Is anyone surprised to hear that he's reckless about talking on who he hates?

Before going to SmackDown he called SD the B Show on an interview. He says he's never watched TNA, but thinks AJ Styles is worthless (he's right, but he was just guessing), he's talked time and time again about how terrible it is to be stuck on SmackDown, he started a physical brawl with Booker T while shooting a commercial and he's been open about the fact that since he's arrived on Brand B that's he's phoned in his matches.

It doesn't matter. Hunter likes him. Flair likes him. Michaels likes him. McMahon likes him. He's shown us that no matter what he does, the top dogs are behind him. He's golden.
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Old 08-24-2007, 01:33 AM   #3
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Oh, and possibly more important than Hunter, Michaels, Flair or McMahon liking him; TOVO likes him, so he must be good!
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Old 08-24-2007, 01:40 AM   #4
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I bet the book is still really boring.
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Old 08-24-2007, 02:05 AM   #5
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The Self Destruction of THE ANIMAL BATISTA!!!


Why do all the crazies freak out on the ropes during matches? ??
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Old 08-24-2007, 02:58 AM   #6
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"And then on my 483254754th title shot I would have won, but the ref was too busy playing lemmings on his cell phone"
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Old 08-24-2007, 06:07 AM   #7
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'Practiced my entrance tonight, and got carried away. I danced for hours. Then Ariel came in and called me a 'Roided up freak show'. I cried and told Vince, he said he'd fire her - bitch'.
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Old 08-24-2007, 08:03 AM   #8
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For some reason, thinking of Batista practicing his entrance made me laugh.
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Old 08-24-2007, 08:14 AM   #9
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I wonder if this was his way of thinking upon his return in July 06 from his injury.

"I will keep fucking up Batista Bombs until Vince gives me the title from Booker"

Seriously, every match he was in nearly every Batista Bomb was fucked up. At Summerslam he lifted Booker up and then dropped him back down and then did the Batista Bomb on the second attempt. As soon as he won the belt he did them perfectly.

The book however, should be a good read.
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Old 08-24-2007, 08:56 AM   #10
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Quote:
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...He's golden.
Yeah, he probably should stop tanning so much before he gets cancer.
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Old 08-24-2007, 09:21 AM   #11
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At least he's over.
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Old 08-24-2007, 09:58 AM   #12
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wow tovo, do you like anyone who doesn't suck?
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Old 08-24-2007, 11:15 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fignuts
wow tovo, do you like anyone who doesn't suck?
Hey likes anyone in the Kliq, so you can go fuck yourself.
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Old 08-24-2007, 11:53 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The One
Is anyone surprised to hear that he's reckless about talking on who he hates?
I'm surprised that they're letting the book come out at all, really.
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Old 08-24-2007, 11:56 AM   #15
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haha
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Old 08-24-2007, 11:57 AM   #16
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Flair needs to come out with a new book to tell all of his stories now since hes divorced. On the Horsemen DVD he said he had so many to tell.
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Old 08-24-2007, 12:21 PM   #17
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I'd love to hear how Batista explains Booker handing him his ass
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Old 08-24-2007, 12:41 PM   #18
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"Dear Diary:

Today, I let Booker T beat me up in a fight, because sometimes, you gotta let them dark folk feel good about themselves.

Thus completes my charity work for the year."


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Old 08-24-2007, 12:47 PM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fignuts
wow tovo, do you like anyone who doesn't suck?
Come on now, it's not like I'm worshiping Batista, but on SmackDown, he's pretty much carrying the entire damn show himself...Well not so much him, but his entrance is wicked cool, which means that he has a solid 1 minute of entertainment per week. That's a hell of a lot more than 99% of the rest of the wrestling world these days.
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Old 08-24-2007, 12:52 PM   #20
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"Dear Diary:

I was touched by Devon tonight. He told me if I was to get on the big show I would have to do it. Little did he know that I already got the part. LOL

But now my crotch really, really burns."
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Old 08-24-2007, 12:53 PM   #21
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Quote:
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Yeah, he probably should stop tanning so much before he gets cancer.
You know he's Filipino right?
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Old 08-24-2007, 01:10 PM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by addy2hotty
'Practiced my entrance tonight, and got carried away. I danced for hours. Then Ariel came in and called me a 'Roided up freak show'. I cried and told Vince, he said he'd fire her - bitch'.
That really made me laugh for some reason
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Old 08-24-2007, 01:11 PM   #23
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Greek-Filipino.
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Old 08-24-2007, 02:04 PM   #24
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Bobby Lashley should release a book.

It should be called "Swimming with Bathturds : The Bobby Lashley story"

I would buy a copy, but only if it had the above title.

Also, it should use "NO!" a lot, such as, "Did I think WWE made a good decision having me drop the ECW title? NO!"
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Old 08-24-2007, 03:03 PM   #25
Mooияakeя™
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Quote:
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"He also talks "almost recklessly""
Ah, kinda like his wrastlin' then....
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Old 08-25-2007, 05:19 PM   #26
Anybody Thrilla
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I would like to hear more about this pit of danger that he has allegedly walked some miles inside.
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Old 08-25-2007, 05:28 PM   #27
Xero
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It's filled with crocodiles, flaming pits of lava and people telling him that he's going to be stuck on the B brand for the rest of his career.
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