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Old 05-24-2004, 01:28 PM   #1
Marc the Smark
 
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What WON'T Happen on Raw...
Well, we never know what will happen on Raw, but let's list some things that WON'T... This could be very funny.
Last edited by Marc the Smark; 05-25-2004 at 05:03 PM.
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Old 05-24-2004, 01:31 PM   #2
Gerard
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Kane shagging lita in the middle of the ring...



NIGGA GRABBED MY BOOB!
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Old 05-24-2004, 01:32 PM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gerard
Kane shagging lita in the middle of the ring...
Unless she's in a coffin.
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Old 05-24-2004, 01:34 PM   #4
Fryza
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Fryza puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Fryza puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Fryza puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Fryza puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Fryza puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Fryza puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Fryza puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Fryza puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)Fryza puts the "bang" in Bangladesh (30,000+)
*Christian nails the Unprettier*

JR: BAH GAWD UNPRETTIER!
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Old 05-24-2004, 02:02 PM   #5
Gone Mad
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Lita pulls an Academy Award winning promo.
Musical Chair Battle Royale for the IC Title.
Val Venis,Matt Hardy, or Steven Richards NOT getting squashed.
Kane turning face.
JR and King talking about nuclear fission
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Old 05-24-2004, 02:55 PM   #6
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Bret Hart appearing...
Stone Cold appearing...
Hulk Hogan appearing...
Triple H talking to a bush...
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Old 05-24-2004, 03:15 PM   #7
Jonster
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Me winning the title.
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Old 05-24-2004, 03:59 PM   #8
The CyNick
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VKM joining the Eric Bischoff Kiss My ass Club
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Old 05-24-2004, 04:00 PM   #9
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Randy Orton cuts a promo that isn't unoriginal and boring.

Ditto HHH.

Chris Jericho gets a well deserved title shot.

We get a decent match commentary.
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Old 05-24-2004, 04:50 PM   #10
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The King running the entire show without saying "Puppies" and getting an erection

Shawn Michaels Pronouncing his love for Canada

Vince apologizing for the screw job

The Hurricane and Rossie actually being taken seriously

Kane shagging Lita backstage without Lita botching it
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Old 05-24-2004, 04:52 PM   #11
OssMan
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Rosie graduating from S.H.I.T
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Old 05-24-2004, 04:52 PM   #12
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Hurricane saying stand back.
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Old 05-24-2004, 04:53 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tiken

Kane shagging Lita backstage without Lita botching it
LMAO
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Old 05-24-2004, 04:58 PM   #14
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HBK and HHH end their feud.
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Old 05-24-2004, 05:49 PM   #15
Kane Knight
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Kane coming out with a French Poodle (His lunch not included).

The Hurricane winning a title match. ANY TITLE. EVER.

JR getting his lines right.

JR getting excited over anyone but Austin.

JR losing weight (Jesus Christ, strap him to a treadmill for the two hours he's on air or something).

King protesting the rampant sexism on Raw.

A decent women's match.

the return of Kane's invisible friend.

Mr. Socko strike out on his own.
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Old 05-24-2004, 05:50 PM   #16
Kane Knight
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tucsonspeed6
HBK and HHH end their feud.
The fans caring about their feud.
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Old 05-24-2004, 05:56 PM   #17
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Eugene learning simple motor skills.
The return of Karl Malone one on one with Kane.
Gillberg pins Benoit for the World Title.
Flair suddenly is not god.
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Old 05-24-2004, 06:33 PM   #18
Ferocious
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Jericho will not take Hurricane and Rosey hostage.
Repo Man will not appear.
Ditto Lex Luger and Marty Janetty.
There will not be an Amish Roadkill sign in the crowd.
Nobodies upper body will be covered in glow in the dark paint.
Kane will not give birth to a hippopotamus.
HHH will not attempt an Asai Moonsault.
Eugene will not appear at the launch of his first book E=MC2
There will not be any footage of Randy Orton mating with a Thompsons Gazelle
There will be no wrestlers wearing stilts
There will not be a Pie eating contest
Tugboat will not start a feud with Vader
There will not be a castration
We will not see a sacrifice to Loki the god of mischeif
We will not hear Kanes rendition of 'Achey Breakey Heart'
Nobody will be late for the show due to them being stuck in the car park of a petting zoo.
Eugene and Al Snow will not play Backgammon, Chess, Checkers or Scrabble.
Aliens will not abduct Jerry Lawler
DDP will not use the Diamond Cutter on Randy Orton
We will not see the Ultimate Warrior shaking the ropes to psyche himself up.
Batista will not take a career change and start dressing up as Pluto at Disney World.
Ric Flair will not perform Swan Lake on ice.
The Cheeky Girls will not be singing the words to the opening credits
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Old 05-24-2004, 06:36 PM   #19
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JR actually telling us when there will be commercials...

Tajiri swallowing the mist by mistake and dies... Later it's noted that Triple H switched packets.

King Kong showing up and eating Steph...

King Kong showing up and eating Triple H... Then gets heartburn and dies cause he ate "bad pie"...

Little Johnny Debuting...

Bret Hart returning and saying that it was all a fix and he was a plant in WCW... Goes on to reveal himself as Eugene's "Mom" and beating up Bischoff... Yes, Bischoff's sister was Bret Hart all along!

Triple H promoting Randy Orton to leader of Evolution...
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Old 05-24-2004, 06:40 PM   #20
Ferocious
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Spike Dudley being named as Taker and Kanes third brother
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Old 05-24-2004, 08:57 PM   #21
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Steven Richards will not win a match (damn shame)
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Old 05-25-2004, 01:58 PM   #22
thuganomicalcrippler
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Hurricane and Rosey will NOT fight anyone besides La Resistance
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