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#1 |
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He's Here
Posts: 60,735
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Taboo Tuesday Press Conference Captions
Again, why not?
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#2 |
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He's Here
Posts: 60,735
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![]() Triple H: My finger can hold ANYONE down! Anyone wana try me?! Fan with Shotgun: Yeah, ME... Triple H: I stand corrected... ![]() Ric: What do you mean I'm not wearing any pants? This is the new fad! Invisipants! WOOOOO! Trish: God... ![]() Shawn: (Yelling) IF I CAN ONLY HAVE HIM PUT ME IN THE MAIN EVENT EIGHT MORE TIMES, I'D BE HAPPY! (Whispering) That would be great! Stacy: Uh, Shawn... Shawn: Oh no... Did I just say the quiet part loud and the loud part quiet again!? ![]() Ric: This red pill tastes funny... ![]() WWE wants YOU... The average Hoss, to participate in the $1,000,000 RAW Hoss Search! ![]() Trish: Oop... Did I do that? Coach: Mmm... Farts... ![]() ![]() HBK: Raar! Raar! I have claws! I'm a kitty cat! ![]() Dave: I'll give you a hint... It aint no gun! ![]() Triple H needed Goldberg's security after what happened at the WrestleMania press conference... |
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#3 |
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MoeFREAK
Posts: 1,682
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![]() Trish: Wow no wonder the whole airplane incident was such a big deal! I guess it really is that small! Flair: Just touch it baby! WOOOOO! |
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#4 |
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FIT Challenge Slag People
Posts: 13,816
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![]() HHH: I'd like to welcome all of you here to the commemoration of my 300th World Title reign... ![]() RIC: Wanna ride Space Mountain? TRISH: No! RIC: Splash Mountain? TRISH: No! RIC: Big Thunder Mountain? TRISH: No! RIC: The Country Bear Jamboree? TRISH: What the--? ![]() HHH: (squeaky voice) Hey, congratulations on winning the title again, Hunter! (normal voice) Thanks, Mister Lefty! (squeaky voice) You're the greatest wrestler ever! TRISH: Why the hell is he talking to his hand? SHAWN: I don't know. It was Vince's idea. VINCE: This guy is gold! ![]() DAVE: Thanks for leading me to my seat, Ric. RIC: You're welcome, but now aren't you sorry you didn't listen to me? DAVE: I always thought that "You'll go blind" was just an expression... ![]() DAVE: Ric, you're such a dick! You told me this was the Taboo Tuesday press conference, not a T.A.T.U. concert! ![]() "Trishtanka" was not exactly the best way to reach out to the Native American population. ![]() SHAWN: ...so ah grabbed 'er boobies an'... COACH: Dude, his Clinton impression owns! ![]() DAVE: So, I'm glad that I could get this opportunity to let all the WWE fans know that I'm not just a monosyllabic ape who dresses in short shorts. I'm a sophisticated thirty-something man of intelligence. REPORTER: Well, we're glad to set the record straight. DAVE: Straight? What, you think I'm gay or something? RAAAR! DAVE SMASH! MUST CHANGE INTO TIGHTS! (Again, way too much set-up, not nearly enough pay-off. I'm sorry.) ![]() MAN ON RIGHT: Well, what do you think so far, Mister Helmsley? HHH: Not bad, not bad... Except that I wanted a SOLID GOLD HOUSE! Why the hell is the ceiling still white! Vince is going to hear about this! |
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#5 |
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Spammy Certified
Posts: 46,132
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![]() With this being an internet PPV HHH needed protection from Brock......Don't know why he hired Gilberg though. |
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#6 |
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It's Hammer Time
Posts: 2,207
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![]() HHH: Dammit SOMEBODY here HAS to pull my finger! ![]() Ric: So that's when I told him: No way man! No way I'm jumping from a speeding car! Trish: Zzzzzzzz... Woman's Belt: Why? Why have I been forsaken! Water Bottle: Hey baby, don't worry. You still have me. ![]() HHH: And then I ate the bowl! ![]() Mr President. I'll be your bodyguard for the evening. ![]() *shocking* Look! There's O'Haire! ![]() What? On my face? Ummm... it's nothing. DAMN YOU RIC!![]() Shawn practices his new marionette skills. Only he forgot the marionette. ![]() The WWE pays Bentoit so little he had to grow a beard and take a second job as a reporter. ![]() HHH realizes his dream when he makes Stone Cold Steve Austin a member of his personal security. |
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#7 | |
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Posts: 61,634
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#8 |
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EL MERO MERO!
Posts: 4,259
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![]() HHH: MAHONEY!!! ![]() Ric: If you give me your water, I could give you some of HHH's chocolate... NOW GIVE ME BAGALGLAAJFAS!!! ***flops*** ![]() HHH: ..That big that Orton could use it as a douche! **crowd laughs** Orton: This isn't a roast, H. HHH: Roast? ![]() Batista really needs a job if he is part-time hand washer at the Bradley Center's bathroom. ![]() HBK: uM, Dave??? Batista: Hold on... I have seen "the Matrix" enough times to do this! ![]() Mahoney is still the man! Just look at Trish and you'll see that. ![]() HHH: oK, Shawn.. you mind not doing your Lita promo impression again? ![]() Batista: I know I am a hand washer.. but why are you an interviewer, Benoit? ![]() DOUBLE VASE ACTION! note: I did all these in under a minute! |
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#9 |
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Posts: 61,634
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![]() Triple H: I am The Game and the only 300-time World Heavyweight Champion, Orton! ![]() Trish's new futuristic telekinetic powers make Flair's tie a little too tight. ![]() Unfortunately there was no Emmy Music to cut short the promo Triple H cut when he won the Emmy for "Person on screen for most of the duration of sports entertainment program". ![]() Ric Flair's new gimmick as President, and Batista's new gimmick of "Agent Dave" would have gotten over, if Flair didn't die and go stiff half-way through the handshake. ![]() Batista was the only one to interupt Triple H's ceremony because his favourite show, Dora the Explorer, was on. Dora: Do you nkow which letter's the letter "O"? *Batista points to screen* *Mouse clicks on "O"* Batista: Shit! |
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#10 | |
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Tongue my Fartbox
Posts: 5,363
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ROFL
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#11 |
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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![]() HHH: "If I was running for the president-uh, you would all vote for me-uh, I will hold down George W. Bush-ah, I will hold down John Kerry-ah, and I will hold down Saddam Hussein-ah and Ossama Bin Laden-ah. I, HHH, will save the United States of America. I, the game-uh, will rule the world. Any questions from the audience?" Fan in audience raises hand. HHH: "Yeah, you." Fan: "Are you running for President?" HHH: "No."![]() Flair: "You're making me nervous sitting next to you Trish..." Trish: "Why because I'm young and beautiful?" Flair: "No, you're brushing your hand up between my legs. Your husband's not going to be happy when he hears about this." ![]() Vince: Why does HHH always have his hand up? Shawn: He's the game. Stacy: Shawn, get your hand off my leg. Randy: HHH has bad breath that I can smell it over here. ![]() Flair: You look like Steve Urcle with those glasses on. Batista: If you hold my hand so I won't fall and say "Did I do that!!!" ![]() ![]() Batista: "Look, it's a bird, it's a plane, it's HHH holding down the presidential campaign." ![]() Coach: "I still can't see whether she's Pam Anderson or Anna Nicole Smith." ![]() Shawn: "You see this hand, this is a new move of mine, and no it's not the Mandible Claw that Mick Foley has. It's called the Cat Scratch." ![]() Batista: "If you make fun of my glasses one more time, I'm going to give you something to laugh about." ![]() Black guy on left: Oh no, HHH walked by me. Guy on the right: This is bad news, he's holding our jobs down. We're fired. HHH thinking to himself: "What the hell are these guys talking about?" |
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#12 |
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Pelvic Sorcerer
Posts: 64,762
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Just a quick question, why the hell is Stacey Kiebler there? They could have brought Gail Kim or you know, one of the divas that does something instead of her dumb ass.
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#13 | |
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He's Here
Posts: 60,735
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#14 |
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I have no gimmick
Posts: 1,088
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![]() So I take it in my left hand and its at this point I have to say "Oooo Hunter, its so big" |
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#15 |
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WOOOOOOOOO!
Posts: 12,237
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![]() I would just like to announce that I've found my smile... ![]() Ric: So about that favour.... |
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#16 |
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As over as Crystal Pepsi
Posts: 21,639
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![]() “I would like to announce the winner of the “Front Row Ticket” contest to Taboo Tuesday… Brock Lesnar!” ![]() Ric: IEEEEEEEE! Okay, okay, okay! Let go! Your nails! OUCHHHHHH!!!!! Trish: Promise not to ask if I want to ride Space Mountain again? Ric: Possibly! Trish: Well, looks like that’s the best answer I’ll get. *15 mins later* Ric: So, Trish, wanna ride Space Mountain? ![]() For some reason the crowd thought that this was too formal of a set up for WWE Karaoke Night. ![]() Ric: It’s good to see you here Dave… Why are you here? Batista: The buffet. ![]() Batista: Stop screaming at my tie! Rico: Oh come on! I know blind people who have better color sense! That tie clashes with itself for crying out loud! ![]() She made fun of his sunglasses. He replaced her lip balm with Rhyno’s. They’re now even. ![]() “Get….closer…..to…..me……If…..Luke…..Can…..Do…..It……So…..Can…..I…..” ![]() Batista: You’re not here to make fun of my tie also, right? Dude:…..lemme move onto the next person…. |
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