Royal Rumble 2004 Captions

[Corkscrewed]

First... the pics by themselves:

[Corkscrewed]

To celebrate Benoit winning the Rumble, I'm brining back a LOT of old gags.


The tables were reversed on Flair (pun intended) when the Dudley's tricked him into thinking he had lost a contact, then cracked the table over his head when he got down to look for it.


Bubba screamed out in fear and horror as Flair went for the 619. Meanwhile, D-Von entertained the crowd with his 80s style hip hop dance.


The Dudley's quickly gave themselves up when the fashion police showed up to arrest any and all bumblebees.


Seeing Bubba Ray baring his legs and wearing a miniskirt was so painful that Coach immediately collapsed and ruptured his ribs.


Luckily for the censors, the table was blocking the graphic part of what Dave "The Violator" Batista was doing to D-Von.


Eventually, the whole WWE roster (sans Kane) decided to take part in a collective video effort in the WWE Tutor-a-Wrestler program and teach Goldberg who to spell basic English words. Here Cena demonstrates how to spell "life" and "word."


Jamie Mysterio, the Siamese self-feuding wrestler, was met with mixed reactions.


LOL! So many things going on here.
While Nidia was busy looking for her dropped quarter, Jamie Noble busied himself with the Gorilla Tumble Dance, and referee Jimmy Corderas farted in the crowd's general direcdtion.


Much to Noble's chagrin, Nidia's penis-sucking cane had a life of its own.


Much to the crowd's confusion, Chavo and Eddie capped off their feud not by wrestling, but by standing around and hurling racist Mexican insults at each other.
(I got nothing.)


The amazing thing about this picture is that Chavo is actually kicking out with a vengeance!
(When in doubt, go with a classic.)


Eddie fulfills every Mexican's dream by choking out his immigration lawyer.


Sometimes, Eddie could get pretty brutal while playing Simon Says.


Brock Lesnar helpfully picks up a piece of trash discarded on the floor.


Brian Hebner was so amazed at Brock going for the Ki Krusher that he phased out of existence.


HHH: "Your hair... how did you get it so silky smooth, Clairol Herbal Essences?"
HBK: "Yes."
HHH: "Yes?"
HBK: "Yes!"
HHH: "YES?!"
HBK: "YES!!!"
HHH: "Shhh! Quiet! They'll think we're in my bedroom or something."


Leave it to Triple H to be the consumate heel and steal the other person's knee pads.


Shawn Michaels had the rare ability to summon a hadoken fireball out of his ASS.


Must have been all the bumps he's taken over the years, but it looks like Michaels forgot they weren't at Triple H's home again.


The PMS bird strikes again!!!

OR

Triple H finds out the embarrassing why what Stephanie's really been doing when she's on her period.


HBK: "Check out this flea circus on my hand!"
HHH: "Whoa! Lemme get a closer look!"
Crowd:


Things got a little bizarre when Triple H's Hold-Down Aura suddenly backfired and started working in reverse...


After all of that, HHH and Shawn Michaels were too tired to even cuddle.


"He's a homo!"


Putting someone else over. Yup, this was a familar position, Rhyno thought.


Kane was enraged when Sean O'Haire failed to get him some popcorn.


Mick demonstrates his O face.


Ever the multitasker, Foley managed to eliminate Orton AND shoot Sean O'Haire's cage open, freeing the poor trapped guy.


So that's what Nunzio used all the wagering money for! The best seats in the house!


Even Brock Lesnar found it extremely hard to carry Goldberg in the match.


As you can see here in this illustration, when large gaseous masses collapse into black holes, they tend to draw all the talented wrestlers into them.


Triple H didn't appreciate the fact that Jericho was just hanging around.

OR

Jericho reveals the secret of David Blaine's levitating trick.


Benoit simultaneously won the Rumble and showed off his incredible strength by giving Big Show the sickest brainbuster DDT ever.


Benoit: "Ahhhhhhhhhh!!! I have to job to Triple H!!!!"

[Savio]

The rumble was going on for 2 days.....they decided to eat the big show....there was much rejoicing

[Kane Knight]

D-Von unzipped his pants, anticipating the new 3D



The Dudleyz bring back the sun with an archaic ritual with roots reaching all the way back to Wrestlemania 3...

...Now for the ritual sacrifice...



this was not the time for a Napolean impression...



Exhibitionism sometimes leads to some awkward discoveries...



Cena finally shows Big Show how to spell "Word Life."



Jamie Knoble's head was grafted to Rey's body, causing the ref to have a hard time calling the match



Nidia displays her new WWE necklace

(Okay, that sucked. There was really fuck all I could think of)



Jamie Knoble was FURIOUS that Michael Jackson had interfered in his match...



Eddie: I don't like this one bit, Homez.

Chavo: I know, man, but you know the contract. HGA at the Rumble, get a massive push. No HGA, we're losing to Paul London next week of Velocity.



Foreplay was over: It was time to jump in...



FIVE SECONDS ISN'T LONG ENOUGH! YOU HEAR ME?



Tap out! TAP! Ooh! Ice Cream Man!



Brock refused to let go until Hardcore told him what the sign said.



Misunderstanding the concept of "Feeding Hardcore" to him, Brock enjoyed a midmatch snack...



Shawn: You know, Hunter, when I said "Screw You," I didn't mean it literally. And what IS that? Baby oil?



Come on, Shawn! One more situp!



coochie coochie coo...



Aliens infected both wrestlers with a retrovirus that slolwy forced them to revert to cave days. already, HHH could not properly pronounce "politics."



GROG BE STRONGER!



Both wrestlers losing the ability to walk erect kinda killed the "Last Man Standing" thing.



He was the one who didb't return salute!



Kane was an interesting choice to sing "Oh Canada."



Mick Foley acheives his dream of the 9 minute mile...



Mick added insult to injury with his shadow puppets.



"I've gotta go in NOW? But I just got Threesies!"



Trying to save his own ass, Goldberg gives his opponent a wedgie.



GROUP HUG!



Rhyno's practical joke actually saved Chris, as the crazy glue prevented his feet from touching the ground.



Benoit not only eliminated Big Show, but pants him as well



Monica Llewinski helps Benoit celebrate.

[El Santo]

As Flair continues his search for his long-lost dignity, the Dudleys helpfully suggest that he look under the table.


Bubba: "Gah! Are you sure this is going to help make us a better tag team?!?!"
D-Von: "Hey, it worked for the Bashams."


As Stevie Richards and his new ally, Invisible Victoria, hold the ring hostage, Ric Flair wisely ducks for cover.


It's always embarassing when you're trying to sell an injury, then you bang your head against the table.


An observant fan holds up a sign to show how much he's grossed out by the blatantly homoerotic in-ring action.


Soon after Cena made his mark on the paper with his signet rings, the whole crew cracked up when Josh Matthews observed, "EFIL DROW? Is that some sort of high level AD&D character or something?"


Ref: "Rey! You're finally in a non-gay mask! You look fabulous! I must... paint you!"
Noble: "He's right, Rey. It is pretty swank."


Noble reacts in fear and confusion after Nidia tells him that the WWE is just a computer-generated dream world built to keep cruisers under control.



Noble: "What are you trying to tell me? That I can dodge bullets?"
Nidia: "No, Noble. I'm trying to tell you that when you're ready, you won't have to."



After an hour, the ref flinches first, and the first ever three-way staring contest was now reduced to the final two contestants.



To be sure, the whole purpose of the match was to make Chavo look like a total tool, but did Eddie really have to do the Big Wiggle on the top turnbuckle?



Eddie: "And THIS little piggie cried wee wee wee all the way home!"
Chavo Sr: "No! Not the little piggie! *sob* That poor, poor piggie.... *sob*"



Eddie and Chavo take a break from their roughhousing to smile for a family photo.



Brock: "Holy Jesus! This is the 'Royal Rumble'? Then why the hell am I main eventing with Hardcore Holly?"



Brock would have gone for the F-5 at this moment, but when Hardcore laid a peck on his cheek, he was too confused and frightened to continue.



HBK felt uncomfortable staring another guy in the eyes, but it was all he could do to avert his gaze from Hunter's pot belly.



Hebner: "C'mon guys! Enough with the footsies! We have a match to start!"




In a heartfelt tribute to the Superbowl, Shawn and HHH do the world's best impersonation of a field goal.




HHH: "Got your nose, bitch!"




Shawn froze. The Star of David! Yahweh, the Hebrew God, was here! He was saved!



Shawn: "Yahweh, please impart on me your divine power to both make me look like a legitimate top-level wrestler, but to also appease Hunter by letting him retain the title!"



Having finished his role, Yahweh departs to watch the debut of Mel Gibson's "The Passion of Christ" in New York.



As soon as the two passed out, Hebner realized that he should have used Right Guard deodorant.



SCSA: "Which one of you was the homo again?"



Yahweh: "Aw, what the hell. Can't miss the Rumble."



"KHHHAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!"



Mick hated being on the run, but the Letter "M" was a vicious stalker.



Randy collapses after he's completely grossed out by Mick's "Bit My Own Finger Off" trick.



Realizing that there's absolutely no way he'd be winning the Royal Rumble, Nunzio uses the time productively by puttering around the ring in his invisible motor scooter.



Goldberg: "Wha---? Hoowwwwid ah git heerrrrre.... Ah'mmm soo drunkkkk..."
Brock: "Alright, Goldberg... atta boy... Lay off the hooch next time, you clown..."


Grab your partner, doh-see-doh...


As part of his taunt to mock Kurt's Olympic history, Y2J does a mean impersonation of the gymnastic high bar.



Benoit: "Who ordered the Supersize tub of lard!"
Ref: "Right here!"



The Ref was just as happy as the millions of internet fans when Benoit picked up the win, but he really didn't need to hear the Rabid Wolverine sing "Rock you like a hurricane."

[Savio]

Ok corky who has the best captions so far?

[Nowhere Man]

The Dudleyz momentarily broke kayfabe to check on Flair. I mean, they knew that tables sometimes worked a little too stiff, but that was just uncalled for.



Say what you will about Steven Richards, but no one does a better 6-1-9 than him, as Bubba learns the hard way.



Suddenly, the Dudley Boyz rip off their masks to reveal they're not The Dudleyz at all! It's Harlem Heat!!!



Bubba would have been more imposing looming over his fallen adversary, had he remembered to put on some damn pants first.



Getting slammed through a table is bad enough, but having the guy who did it proceed to dry-hump you afterwards is enough to ruin anyone's day.



Apparently, John Cena's jewelry was provided by Johannes Gutenberg. (cookie for anyone who knows who the hell that is)



Noble made sure to hold Rey still while the ref hypnotized him into doing his bidding.



The Smackdown roster was unaccustomed to the ways of the nefarious Raw talent. As you can see, Teddy Long is about to have a field day.



Noble: Whaddya mean Nowhere Man can't come up with anything for this picture?



Eddie wasn't about to let the match start until his invisible dog was done doing its business.



Eddie and Chavo were true pioneers in the art of expressionistic wrestling. Here, Eddie symbolizes the current direction of WWE's ratings, while Chavo represents the welfare of lower-card wortkers.



No one was really sure just what Eddie's problem with Cheech Marin is, but damn if he didn't make it personal.



Eddie torments his nephew with the classic "breaking an egg on your head" gag.



Here, Holly delivers the saddest looking Northern Lights ever.



Lex Luger makes his triumphant return to WWE.



HHH: So, who's turn is it to job tonight?
HBK: Yours.
HHH: No, yours!



"No, YOURS"



"No, YOURS!



In what had to be one of the sickest spots in wrestling history, not only does HBK get suplexed through a table, but his left foot explodes in mid-move!!



As if HBK's exploding foot wasn't bad enough, HHH skinned Michaels' face off!

And somewhere in a far-off jail cell, Rob Black is crying for not doing it first.



Michaels was never good at doing a Stone Cold impression. He kept forgetting which finger to use.



Everyone knew that HHH was really phoning it in when he showed up to PPV's drunk off his ass.

HBK: well, that would explain the massive beer gut.



HHH's ring work had gotten so bad, he was even putting himself to sleep.



Eric quickly tried to shift the blame when Austin found out Benoit was coming over to Raw.



The Rumble entrants were completely unaware of the gigantic ninja shuriken flying in from the rafters. Kwang had returned!!!



Ever the prankster, Booker T gives Kan ethe worst wedgie of his life.



Foley charged the ring at full speed, stopped, remembered it wasn't 1999 anymore, and turned around and went home.



WWE hoped to spice up the Foley/Orton feud by re-creating the infamous Austin/Pillman angle. It's just too bad the props department got its funding cut, because it'd be a lot more convincing with real guns.



Kwang wasn't the only one who had made a surprise return, as the Repo Man made off with Nunzio's laptop. And his pants.



Goldberg: What?!?! I was just checking my email earlier!!!!
Brock: COMPUTER BAAAAAAAAD!!!!!!!



Dogpile on the no-talent fatass!!!!



Jericho was actually supposed to be eliminated here, but that damn Rhyno just couldn't help himself.



Benoit: See? That's why I said trying a tope suicida was a bad idea.



Ref: Congratulations, Benoit! I can't wait to see you come over to Raw. I think you'll do a great JOB.
Benoit: What?
Ref: Nothing, I was just saying that you'll make a great ENHANCEMENT to Raw's TALENT pool.
Benoit: Why do you keep talking like that?
Ref: Oh, no reason. I just think YOU'RE GOING TO BE very happy on Raw, and that all your suspicions will be BURIED . Now, GET OUT and celebrate your victory, WHILE YOU STILL CAN appreciate the moment.

EDIT: Dammit! About half of my jokes had been done before I could get this post done!

[Innovator]

Flair watches Bubba and D-Von redecorate the ring, thinking that the Dudleys have watched too much trading spaces



Flair and Bubba couldn't watch D-Von botch the Thriller dance



Batista: Ha I didn't say Simon Says!!!



come on, the match wasn't that bad......



corkscrewed's caption was too good



Cenas been hanging out with RVD too much, he can't even remember his own catchphrase



Upon hearing HHH is coming to the ring, the ref and Jamie Noble "assume the position"



Nidia always has time to pet her ...... pet WWE logo



The Guerrero starting contest reaches hour 9, neither man showing signs of backing down



Eddie flys off, proving that he is Superman



Eddie stops the attack, sees that Ja Rule is making his entrance



Brock uses the butterfly effect to get himself out of this shitfest of a match



Someone tell Brock he doesn't need to sacrifice anyone, hes the champ



HHH: Shawn, your hair is getting too long



HHH is the ultimate evil. Not only does he have the figure four on Shawn, but he's using the force to choke him out too.



HHH, no matter how much he holds people down, can't fight back against HBK and God



no real caption, just thought how weird it was seeing the owner of ECW and WCW in the same ring.



Steiner was amazed, O'Haire escaped his cage



Kane picked a bad time to reenact the score from the HMS Pinafore



After the hosses had killed off all real talent, they began to feed on each other



Worst time for an orgy ever



Jericho holds on for dear life, little does he know the glass ceiling is coming crashing down



The glass ceiling crashes, killing the Big Show



No caption, Benoit is the man

[loopydate]

Once again, someone is disqualified for violating the rules of the WWE Limbo Competition.



Flair had to stop mid-stomp. Damned if Bubba didn't do the best Brando "Stellaaaaaaaaaaaa" he'd ever heard!



GOD: Which of thee is Bubba 37?
BUBBA: I am!
D-VON: Me!
GOD: I doth not think so.



The Joe Boxer guy reacts to the worst wedgie of his life.



The sign "Holly Who?" could only mean one of two things:
1) Vince was wrong and the crowd wasn't rallying behind Hardcore.
2) The No Limit Soldiers were preparing to make their WWE debut.
If you guessed 1...you don't know Vince very well.



JOHN: Check these fly rubber stampers I lifted from the library, yo!



Jamie was struck by a thought: If Nidia was going on sound, how would she know when and where to reach out and grab an ankle without getting her hand stomped on? Omigod...she's not blind!



COLE: Wait a minute!
TAZZ: Steven Richards with the DDT out of nowhere!



JAMIE: Baby, why didn't you stop him?
NIDIA: These glasses protect my eyes, they're not infrared!



Eddie starts the offense with...the Knee Point! It's over!



Eddie, once again foiled by Rhyno.



EDDIE: Why aren't you on The West Wing no more, homes?
CHAVO: I told you...*ack*...I'm not Edward James Olmos!



Eddie had learned a lot growing up with Chavo. Not only did he show it with this eye gouge, he showed it by also gouging Chavo's two "secret" eyes.



HARDCORE (coming up for air): *Gasp* I'm sorry! I didn't mean it!
BROCK: Get back down there. You knew what you were getting yourself into when you asked for a main-event push.



Worst. Crucifix. Ever.



HBK: Heheh. Remember when you got thrown in the hog pen?
HHH: Remember when you posed for Playgirl?
*Awkward silence*



Triple H had been deceived! HBK kept the Figure-Four in, and he didn't show any signs of letting up. But Steph had told him that he could use the Force...



"Y?" Because WWE hates us.



HHH: My father did NOT smell of elderberries!
HBK: *Gasp* Your mother was a hamster...



HHH: Dude, that must have been some pimple.



HHH: No, Shawn, don't catch the WMXX logo by the pointy end!



One downside to having a honker the size of HHH's: When you get groggy, it tends to weigh you down.



Earl makes a sudden and irrevocable heel turn when he starts doing the Test jumping jacks.



AUSTIN: Which one of you guys went out of business first?



Matt was entranced. If those two could take out a 'roided-up freak like that, maybe he SHOULD take Ultimate Warrior up on his challenge.



Booker T obviously wasn't a Night Court fan.



"Yodelin'" Mick Foley made his surprising debut.



Mick "Tongue-Biting Shadow-Puppet Maker" Foley gets his gimmicks confused.



Nunzio was the envy of all the WWE superstars. HIS imaginary car was the coolest!



BROCK: *Ugh* They were right!
GOLDBERG: About what?
BROCK: You ARE hard to carry in a match!



Big Show had the best friends ever. All he said was that he could use a hug and...



Growing increasingly bored with the Rumble match, Jericho decided to make up for the gym time he missed last week.



Worst. Diving Headbutt. Ever.



REF: Chris, where are your pants?
BENOIT: Oh, God. IT'S JUST LIKE MY DREAM!

[Vega]

Roots 2: Revenge Of The Black Man



It was pretty obvious that the Dudleyz werne't putting much thought into their match as they both held up the "touchdown" sign when they noticed their team scored on a portable TV one of the fans in the crowd brought.



GOLDBERG: Why Brock, Why?

BROCK: Like you don't know. I looked at the internet history to try and see who the one who's been leaking information out and found GOLDBERG.COM there.

GOLDBERG: But...But...That could have been anyone!

BROCK: Yeah, right. Like anyone other than you would have gone to your website.

GOLDBERG: GOD DAMITT! FOILED AGAIN!

[El Santo]

@ Loppy: LOL. I can never get enough of those Edward James Olmos jokes.

[Corkscrewed]

Apparently, John Cena's jewelry was provided by Johannes Gutenberg. (cookie for anyone who knows who the hell that is)

Gutenberg press. First movable type press ever.

[Corkscrewed]

Okay: best captioneer so far: Loopy.

I think my sig will be changing.

[loopydate]

Wow, sorry for ripping off everybody else's captions. I swear I didn't read them before I did mine.

And Gutenberg invented the "movable type" printing press. (-EDIT- Damn Corky... )

[Nowhere Man]

Man, when I started doing the captions this time, no one else had replied. By the time I was done, 4 or 5 people had already gone and done most of the jokes I was lining up. I'm gettin too old for this.

[loopydate]

^ Happened to me, too. When I started, it was just Corky's captions, then all of a sudden, there was a whole thread full of them. And I ripped off a whole lot of 'em.

[Savio]

Austin: Who made this mess?

[VonErich Lives]

What the heck, let me give this a shot for once...
I didn't read others before I did mine, sorry if I have some duplicates.


Seeing 92yr old Ric Flair can no longer get to the table on his own, the nice young dudley boys bring the table to him.


Bubba cries out in pain, knowing they are the only legitimate jobber tag team left.


Bubba and Devon celebrat being the offical #1 contenders/jobbers for the next few years.


Coach clearly hasn't recovered from his plastic surgery to give him ABS.


Batista figures if this wrestling thing doesn't work out, there's always a career in soft porn.


John Cena proudly displays what he made today in arts and crafts.


Jamie wonders if he wore a mask if it would help him which chicks.


Jamie assumes the position for another night of hot sex with Nidia.


Nidia continues to pretend to be blind, not wanting anyone to think she'd choose to sleep with Jamie Noble is she knew what he looked like.


Eddie and Chavo, each with one hand on their wallet so the other can't steal it.


Eddie confuses Chavos pants for a swimming pool


Eddie once again teaches his older brother how to tie a tie.


Eddie helps chavo with his contact lenses.


In responses to recent hazing commited by Holly, Lesner makes him smell his armpit!


Brock lesner picks up his souviner life size bob holly doll.


HBK & HHH play "Guess my conditioner"


HHH always the gym rat, tries to show HBK the proper way to do situps.


HHH and HBK demostate to the Philly crowd what EndZone-Goalposts looks like.


Mistaking his masculine features for Steph, HHH demands HBK swallow and not spit this time.


HHH tries to tell HBK once again "Use a tampon"


HBK tries to tell HHH he can't get pregnant when on the rag.


HHH goes for his Red Wings.


Earl Hebner not used to unconscious, halfnaked men that he didn't have to give roofies to, doesn't know who to tea-bag first.


Eric Bischoff quickly blames someone else for his fart.


Matt Morgan forgetting the script just stands there waiting for a cue card.


Thank you mistress I'd like another


Mic Foley realises there's only 30days till his next book release runs to the ring to start plugging.


Mic tries to count how many books he has coming out in 2004, but runs out of fingers.


Nunzio seeing Mic in the ring, realizes he could have sat in his seat.


Broc desides to try and break Goldbergs neck before having to work a series with him.


RVD quickly realises the big show hasn't washed or changed his trunks in weeks to prepare for the royal rumble.


Y2J takes some time out for chinups.


After washing the big show, Benoit hangs him on the line to dry.


Yes, Finally after 19years, I can job in the mainevent of wrestlemania, which will sometime between now and then become the first match, while Rock & Sock get top billing.

[Fryza]

The Dudley's attempt at the first ever "Musical Tables" wasn't a very big hit.



Flair: YOUR SOUL IS MINE!
Bubba: *girly scream*
Flair: ....YOU'RE NEXT, DEEVON!
D-Von: hum-a-na-hum-a-na! Exit, stage right!



Dudleys: WE ARE THE NATION, OF DOMINATION!



Though no one was sure if Coach was hurt, he threw out a quick gesture of a thumbs up to ensure he was okay.



To have some strange kayfabish way, the WWE's new censor bar was a table..and thank God it worked fast..



(OMG, SERIOUSLY! Doesn't it look like the hand with "Life" is coming from Josh?!)

La..Lif...Life Word? Is Cena illiterate, or just bad aim?



While the ref talked to Rey about switching to Geico, poor Jamie was confused all to hell, too many big words in one sentence.



Ref: Is this how I "Bend It Like Beckham?"
Noble: DAMNIT! NOW I GET IT! DAMN YOU GEICO! DAMN YOU!
Nidia: ...is this the ring? It feels bumpier than normal...wait, is this Jamie's chest?



Noble: I could have saved alot of mon..
Nidia: *tweek tweek*
Noble: OW!
Nidia: Nope, this is Jamie's chest..



Eddie and Chavo knew what to do..Take out the ref.



Eddie: My job here is done, and your job was obvious. Now, AWAY! FLY FLY!



Eddie was now reduced to using force to get his ties back.



Eddie: Wait...Chavo didn't steal my car keys?
Chavo: MY EYES!



Lesnar: Not now Bob..



This is what happens when a bad wrestler tries to pull off the Buff Blockbuster.



Looks like the vase had a divorce.



Holy hell! Now Trips is stealing body parts! Good lord!



Are DDT's supposed to have that much leverage?



Hunter: WOOO! Bucking bronco!



The WMXX logo swooped in on the unsuspecting wrestlers. Upon landing, Shawn, the ref, and everyone in a fifteen foot radius was killed....except for Hunter, who completed no-selled death; proving his immortality, and causing every "internet" fan to break into a suicidal depression.



After catching the invincibility WMXX logo, Super Shawn was ready to take down Hunter Koopa.



This is the worst attempt at drunken boxing I may or may not have ever seen.



Earl: ...oh...man, they're both down...whatdoIdowhatdoIdo?! Crap...



Eric: No, Paul's a homo!



Matt wondered what would happen if he ran over to that group of men and threw them over. But, saddly, he decided to watch them instead. Maybe Rhyno would get an elimination!

*Rhyno is eliminated*

Or not!



Booker: WEDGIE!
Kane: AYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY!



Foley: One, two, skip to my Lou..



"Homicidal" Mic strikes again!



Wow, the WWE have been having some cuts. They even had to sell the Time-Out Chair..



Lesnar: What...the hell...Glass Ceiling...what the...argh..



RVD: On the count of three...
All: K
RVD: ONE!
All: *lifts up*
RVD: TWO!
All: *lifts up again*
RVD: TH---A PENNY!
All: *confused*



Jericho: WHOA! I survived! Wait...hell on, I saw how this one ends. I go back into the ring, win, then job to Hunter. Been there, jobbed that. *lets go*



I don't know....did Benoit botch the DDT, or did Show botch the attempt at an elimination?



Suddenly, the ref broke Benoit's arm, and knew him over, allowing the ref to go onto the main event at WrestleMania XX

OR

Benoit remembered when Hunter said that Benoit would NEVER got a title show, and if he DID, it be a cold day in Hell.

Suddenly, it began snowing, and the AC in the arena kicked in.

[Corkscrewed]

Realizing the match was going to end crappily, Eddie simply climbed the ring post and flew away.

[Corkscrewed]

*Archive updated... Sig too*

[Sephiroth]

The Dudleyz show how many times before they will get their title.




Nidia: Jamie i can smell your ass!
Ref: Is that what i am smelling.
Jamie: Shut Up! i Forgot my diaper MKAY!




Jamie: Nidia get my diaper!



Eddie: my pants look cooler then yours
Chavo: I don't carry a string!
Eddie: What!? that was supposed to be our little secret



HBK: HHH what is that on your face!
HHH: where on my face?
HBK: Neah, nothing it's just your nose.



HHH did what he does in every match that seems hopeless he drinks ALOT!




Goldberg: Sufrassa blabla
Lesnar: Yes, i will bring you home.



GROUP Wedgie!!!!

[Kane Knight]

Originally Posted by El Santo Bubba: "Gah! Are you sure this is going to help make us a better tag team?!?!" D-Von: "Hey, it worked for the Bashams."

One of the best captions of the night.

[KayfabeMan]

The WWE Stars join together to help get The Big Show a push....


Nunzio takes a moment out to put on his invisible pants....


To make sure the officials definitely could see the feet hitting the
floor,WWE decided to hire only midget referees for the Rumble.....


A big cartoon fan,Foley sings the opening to Spongebob Squarepants'
theme song on the way to the ring.....


Kane desperately wanted to be on WWE Originals....


Shawn Michaels picked a bad time to his Britney Spears impersonation...
-OR- Getting into the Superbowl spirit,HHH & HBK form a human goal post.


Running out of ideas for gimmick matches,WWE presents it's first
ever "Staring Contest Match"...


After stealing their table gimmick,The Dudleys add insult to injury by
stealing Public Enemy's dance...too bad they can't steal their talent.


Hide and seek was a difficult game for The Dudleys; they didn't find
Flair until they moved the table....

[DXJerky-Version 2.5]

Eddie teaches Cheech a lesson for stealing RVD's stash.


Ref: Right Hand Red
Chavo: The board uncle Eddie, not my face!

[Razor Rybek]

All out of ideas and wondering how to put Chavo away, Eddie Decided it was time to unleash the dreaded eyebrow pluck!

[Avenger]

And that, children, is what we like to call "Creative Control"

[CBright7831]

Originally Posted by Corkscrewed

I'm just wondering, what the hell happened in that picture?

[PorkSoda]

After being out for 12 months, Holly finally returns and gets a return match against Lesnar at the Royal Rumble. Unfortunately, he tries a Goldberg spear, and accidently runs head first into Lesnar, breaking his neck again and being out for another 12 months.



The ref does his best Val Venis impression.

Ref: HELLO LADIES!



A few short seconds later, HHH Couldent resist, and bursted out laughing.

[FourFifty]

And this year the Royal Rumble is brought to you by WWE’s newest sponsor, Dos Equis!


Try as he might, Bubba Ray Dudley just couldn’t scream loud enough for the beerman to come to him.


Bubba’s newest finisher- The Celestial Blast Of Death


Coach: Noooo! I don’t wanna be a joke!


No, that’s not a table… That’s the WWE’s newest way to censor things that shouldn’t be shown on television.


When the hell did they decide to bring Nailz back, and dress him up as Cena?


Too bad for Rey, the Jamie Noble easy chairs aren’t that easy to set up. Not even the Ref knows how to do it.


Reason #108 why it’s cool to have a blind girlfriend- She’ll never know that it was you who farted in her face.


Yes Jamie, let’s make faces at the blind girl… Reeeeeal smart of ya….


Chavo: Hey Eddie, what happened to your mullet?
Eddie: Hey Chavito, what happened to your push?


Moment later Eddie came crashing down onto Chavo and the world knew that Eddie forgot his invisible jet pack.


I, too, remember the day I taught my older brother how to tie a tie.


On one hand Eddie and Chavo loved the fact Dos Equis sponsored the PPV, but did the co-sponsor, Yal Rum, need to buy a spot on the ramp?


At one point in time pro wrestling was known around the world as the sport of kings, with such greats as Lou Thez, Freddie Blassie, Frank Gotch, Buddy Rogers, and countless others. In tribute to the sport of kings, this PPV was dubbed the Royal Rumble. In this year’s tribute this match should have been a curtain jerker.


It’s one thing to steal a move from one show and use it on your show, but Lesnar’s Angle Slam was as big of a rip off as the Shooting Star Press.


Triple H could only look in disgust and regret at the love child he had with A-Train.


King: Oh my god! Triple H looks like he’s in a load of pain!
JR: Baw Gawd you’re right King! Triple H looks like he’s in complete agony!
King: This is the first time he has sold in a loooooong time!
JR: …next time you say something like that, turn your mic off…

[FourFifty]

And Goldberg thought he had a good spear!


Ref: Trips, right now is NOT a good time to do your bushwhacker impression.
HHH: Wooooooooah! Yaaaaaaaay!


HHH: Dude, she must me a total slut, isn’t she!
HBK: Yeah, that Carrie will sleep with anyone if you lie to her and tell her you love her.


HBK couldn’t look away from the extension on Triple H’s tights… It’s no wonder why he’s with Vince’s daughter.


And from the rafters comes Teddy Long’s newest protégé, the Black Pacman.


The ref just stood in shock… Triple H, selling?


Eric: Ha! I just talked to Goldberg, and he said your booking was “meh sheh gu na!”
Paul: What? Meshungina is a real word.
Eric: So is Goldberg really saying he shags nuts?
Paul: No, Meshungina is one word, not a phrase.
Austin: Wait! I know this! Isn’t that the word for not eating pork, or something?
Paul: Oy….


All Matt Morgan could do is laugh… None of the Tough Enough winners were in the rumble.


That wasn’t the best time to give Kane an enema.


You’d be running too if Triple H had an assortment of wrestlers playing “Bubble Gum, Bubble Gum in a dish” to see who the next person he would burry would be.


Other wrestlers from the back ran out of the locker room as the game went on.


The WWE is an environmentally friendly corporation. Here, they’re recycling one of HBK’s old moves.


Randy just passed out as there was too much on his mind… Someone who could wrestle, AND cut a promo? Impossible!


Nunzio thought that as long as there was a camera on him he wouldn’t get stuck cleaning Sean O’Haire’s cage.


Chris Beniot, you just won the 2004 Royal Rumble after entering at number 1, you broke the record for the longest time in the ring, and you were able to carry The Big Show in a dramatic ending. What are you going to do?
Beniot: I’m going to Raw!!!


It’s Hoss Tossin’ Time!


Here is your winner of the first ever Hoss Tossin’ Contest, Chris Beniot!

[Corkscrewed]

Very nice captions, Always450!

[FourFifty]

Originally Posted by Always450 Eric: Ha! I just talked to Goldberg, and he said your booking was “meh sheh gu na!” Paul: What? Meshungina is a real word. Eric: So is Goldberg really saying he shags nuts? Paul: No, Meshungina is one word, not a phrase. Austin: Wait! I know this! Isn’t that the word for not eating pork, or something? Paul: Oy….

Ah, I should give some info out... For the people that do not know any Yiddish, Meshungina means crazy. Okay, so it's Yiddish? What does that have to do with me stealing how Goldberg speaks from other captions? Back in the "old contry" Yiddish was used in the Jewish comminutys, and is still used today. Comming from a Jewish home, along with Barry Horwitz, DDP, Raven, Paul Haymen and Goldberg. Thus, it's is funny! BWA HA HA HA HA HA!

[Rock Bottom]

Proof that Ric Flair is working under the table.


The Cat possesses D'Von before he can aid Buh Buh.


PUT YOUR HANDS IN THE AI'A, IF YOU'S A TRUE PLAYA


Maybe if I tape up my ribs and sell, I will look like The Rock.


*Giggle* You naughty boy.. I meant the *kitchen* table!


If I punch you, it will say EFIL DROW. *Rolls the dice to see if he hits*


Rey Counters the headlock by putting Noble in a knee-lock.


Massssssssssster! Look what Smeagol findssssssss! *Insane giggling*


Please, all I've got is 17 bucks.


Eddie: I am going to keel you.
Chavo: Eddie, this is just an angle... It's not real...
Eddie: You turn my own blood against me holmes!
Chavo: ...


Eddie: You are going to die, hombre... I am too queeeeeeeck for you...
Chavo: I'm just pretending to lie here dude, I can see you..


Eddie: You.. my own brother.. HOW COULD YOU DO THEES TO ME?
Chavo Sr.: Eddie! WTF! You told me this was fake!
Eddie: I am going to reep your tie off... ANDPUTITWHEREYOURHEARTUSEDTOBE, holmes!


Ref: Eddie... you killed Chavo.
Eddie: *Sigh* It had to be done...
Ref: ...Dude, this was an angle.
Eddie: ...Oh.


Brock: Hahaha, I can't believe they booked me against Crash Holly.
Hardcore: ...**** you...


Brock: Omfg dude, hahahaha. I am so watching this when I get to my room.
Hardcore: ...*Sigh*


Shawn: *Donald Duck voice* Don't move - I'll go get you a towel.


Shawn: KICK ME IN THE JIMMY!


JR: STUNNER! AUSTIN HIT THE STUNNER ON THE GAME, BUT THE REF IS DOWN!
Tazz: ...WTF?


Hebner's soul is released as Shang Tseung becomes frustrated.


HHH: Shawn, you should have just kept your head up my ass.


Shawn: Ok, put it back on.


Brains... Braaaaaaaaaains...


Hunter: Maybe if we add in a couple more spots where we both lay down for 9 seconds, our match will get more time.


Heyman: Now let's find out who HE REALLY is!


Should I help Rhyno, or should I give this guy a Standing Reverse Bronco Buster?


Booker T: Assume the position, sucka.


HA-DAH, HA-DAH, HA-DAH, HA-DAH... ha-dah... AHHHHHHHHHHH! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!


BA-BANG!


F*ck this. I am making another karate kid movie.


Goldberg: NAHGAHSELIT.
Brock: ..?
Goldberg: NAHGAHFUGAHSELIT!
Brock: (Thinking, "Is this the dude from Waterboy?")


Trish: OH! OH GOD YES! OH!


Oops, almost dropkicked the floor.


JR: WHAT A DDT BY THE ROCK!
Cole: *Slams down his headphones*


HAHAHAHA! F*CK YOU HEYMAN! I DID IT! I REALLY *WILL* JOB TO HHH!

[Rock Bottom]

Originally Posted by Corkscrewed Benoit: "Ahhhhhhhhhh!!! I have to job to Triple H!!!!"

LOL, about 5 of your captions crossed my mind (I did mine before I read the others, namely yours) my bad, rofl, I didn't even see that one.

Edit: *Reading all the caption threads...* ...uh... Damn. (Sorry, I'm new to this board.)