Rate the last movie that you saw for the first time.

[Lock Jaw]

This sea-monster had tentacles.... was more akin to that creature in Lord of the Rings outside Moria

[ClockShot]

Seven Psychopaths - 4/5

[M-A-G]

Black Panther: Wakanda Forever - 3 and 1/2 stars out of 4.

Emotional is the one word that I can use to describe the whole experience. Right from the get go, the film is ready to take those tears from you. If you've got a date that's been invested in these characters and is prone to crying, you can get some major brownie points being the big strong man.

What they do with 'Atlantis' and the people is worth the price of admission alone. The back story of Namor is pretty clever with its changes even though it'll undoubtedly ruffle the feathers of a few purists.

Practically everything and everyone serves a purpose and means something. The inclusion of Riri Williams isn't as awkward as you might've expected, but arguably Letitia Wright and Angela Bassett carry the emotional load here. Granted things kind of settle into the typical Marvel climax but it's earned and really not what's important here. It's all about the struggles of these characters and it's just one big reveal after another, especially with a major punch to the gut in the mid-credits scene. By the way, it's the only post-movie scene so don't fret too much about staying after. Ultimately it's a great send off and a great way for anyone needing some closure on the Chadwick Boseman situation. I can safely call this being up there with No Way Home as being one of the best films of Phase 4.

[ClockShot]

Black Panther: Wakanda Forever - 2/5

This probably could have been better if they hung on and tweaked this a bit more after Chad Boseman's death.

The bad batch of popcorn I got just made the time a bit worse.

[rez]

Anyone ever watched (1980) The Hollywood Knights?

Old man at work wanted me to order it for him at work today so I ordered him the DVD. I was like uhhh, is it like Porky's ? I need to stop wandering into the warehouse.

[Seanny One Ball]

No but now I want to watch it to see a young Michelle Pfeiffer

[Seanny One Ball]

That sent me down a wormhole to find some film my uncle once told me to watch but it’s too obscure to actually buy so you have to stream it on YouTube or Dailymotion.
I’m pretty sure it was “King Frat” but I feel like the name isn’t wild enough. I know it was about a farting competition.

[slik]

Barbarian - 8/10

Very creative and original

[Seanny One Ball]

I can’t be arsed watching the whole thing but “Fire Of Love” has one of the best shot endings in documentary history.
If you know that it’s about two dead volcanologists then you might as well skip to the end and see that footage.
Beautiful.

[Destor]

Black Panther 2 - 5/10

What a slog. They could have cut half the run time and half the characters and the film wouldnt have changed. Namor was cool in action but aestheticlly unappealing. There's a lot wrong with the movie. Hated the score. I could shit on the film for being as bad as it is but everyone who watches will pick up on it on their own. There's really no need.

Still better than Eternals

[Sepholio]

Aqua Teen Forever: Plantasm

I watched it so you guys don't have to.

Although if you like Aqua Teen Hunger Force/Aqua Unit Patrol Squad 1/Aqua Something You Know Whatever/Aqua TV Show Show/Aqua Teen Hunger Force Forever or Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters....or if you are just really fucking wasted, then I highly recommend it.

#1 in da hood, G out of 10

[Destor]

Well i did like ATHFAUPS1ASYWATVSSATHFFpATHFCMFfT

[drave]

Aqua Teen Forever: Plantasm

I watched it so you guys don't have to.

Although if you like Aqua Teen Hunger Force/Aqua Unit Patrol Squad 1/Aqua Something You Know Whatever/Aqua TV Show Show/Aqua Teen Hunger Force Forever or Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters....or if you are just really fucking wasted, then I highly recommend it.

#1 in da hood, G out of 10




How many Linoleum Knives...........




if it's 0 - im out.

[drave]

God I love it still




<iframe width="1039" height="779" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/WWvt3E5a-AA" title="Mastodon - Cut You Up with a Linoleum Knife (Explicit)" frameborder="0" allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen></iframe>

[Lock Jaw]

Black Panther: Wakanda Forever - 8.5/10

Really enjoyed it. Haven't left a Marvel movie thinking "I'd watch that again" since Eternals.

Didn't really care for the first Black Panther movie and wasn't expecting much from this one, but it surprised me and ended up being good.

[Lock Jaw]

Disenchanted - 6/10

Mostly just feels like an excuse for Disney+ content. Some fun ideas and a few good songs, but none as good as the first movie. Story a lot weaker than the first one too, and almost undermines the whole "concept" with the "real world" not really feeling like the real world, even before the wish.

[weather vane]

Heat - 4.75/5

Just came here to rate it! First thing I see when I click the thread. Wild.

8.1/10

[weather vane]

Heat was so good it inspired a real life nutty robbery with crazy body armour and shit.
Heat taught me that one scene really can define a whole film for certain cinema viewers. It should be remembered for the strength of the performances, but even I cannot get enough of that robbery scene. It’s the best thing Tom Sizemore ever got anywhere near.

Loved him as Dallas.

[Seanny One Ball]

I’m trying to think how he ever got famous in the first place. We lose the great character actors like Bruno Kirby and get stuck with trash like Sizemore.

He was glorious in Heat though. Everybody in Heat was.

[rez]

A Christmas Story Christmas...heyyyy, it wasn't half bad!

[Seanny One Ball]

Yeah I saw that was available.

I have to watch it but I am a bit apprehensive so a good review is appreciated. I will watch it soon because I know Frank Drebin will come back for it.

[Seanny One Ball]

He will

[rez]

I'm not a huge fan of the OG Christmas Story. Peeps absolutely make it unbearable since the story takes place in Indiana. Then you have TBS 24 hour marathon. At least this is a fresh take taking place in the early 1970s.

[rez]

The actual house is in the Cleveland, Ohio area and the fictional town is based on Hammond, Indiana which is basically a hop skip over to Chicago, Illinois.

[rez]

Home Alone was in Winnetka, Illinois (Chicago sub) with mentions of South Bend, Indiana. A lotta the classic Xmas movies seemed to love the heart of the Midwest.

[rez]

Chucky counts (Chicago)

[ron the dial]

Meet Me in St. Louis

[Simple Fan]

Have y'all watched Manifest?

[Seanny One Ball]

Every time I see Slap Shot I feel like it’s the first time.
Paul Newman is my all time acting hero and he swears like a trooper in it. It’s so weird.

[Blonde Moment]

Him and McQueen

[slik]

Fignuts if you have a spare 90 minutes please watch Deadstream(I can link you if you can’t find it) and tell me what you think.
I like a good horror comedy and I found that one by looking for a film in which I recognised nobody.

It is good.

Deadstream was tremendous. Very reminiscent of Evil Dead with how it balances silly humor with genuine terror, as well the claustrophobic setting.

Prepare your anus, Seanny, cause you're getting that long awaited fignuts rep.



Also really enjoyed Deadstream

[ron the dial]

i should probably start doing this more but my forte is not verbalizing how i feel about media...

hush (2016) - 8/10

a pretty perfect horror movie. i really enjoy everything flanagan & siegel have done together. a great conceit, very well acted, the tension continues to grow until the climax, and when it finally boils over the intensity is ramped all the way up. plus it has a the perfect run time of 80 minutes.

[Destor]

Is 80 the perfect run time or is 80 the perfect run time for this specificly

[ron the dial]

definitely for this specifically, but in general i like a nice, tight, economical script. of course there are plenty of movies i love that are 2+ hours, but if i had to choose between 120 minutes or 80 minutes based on run time alone, i'm going 80 every time. a movie like detour (1945) is a great example. i think it's like 70 minutes and absolutely knocks it out of the park.

[ron the dial]

i mean i hate to speak in generalities because of course it depends on things like who is writing the script or editing the final product but you get what i mean i hope.

[slik]

80-90 min is honestly my preferred run time for most things

The Ancient Greeks had it right...almost every ancient greek play - comedy or tragedy - runs right around 90 min because they thought it was a good run time to hold an audience's interest

[Destor]

I think i don't have a preference honestly. The question boils down to how long it feels bs how long it is.

[ron the dial]

yeah i get you on that one, which is why i definitely don't shy away from a longer movie based on the run time. something like pulp fiction runs over two and half hours but doesn't feel like it at all, so that run time doesn't bother me. best example i think of off the top of my head but i know there are plenty more.

[Destor]

Im a mark for Tarantino so you'll get no complaints here

[Destor]

I would say something like Two Towers thats 3+ hours but feels like a breeze vs Return of the King with a similar run time but the 20 min after the climax make it feel like 8+ hours is a good example.

[slik]

What is everyone's favorite Tarantino film (there is obviously no wrong answer to this question)

[Destor]

This second Inglorious Bastards but the more i watch Once Upon A Time in Hollywood the more i think it may become my favorite.

[slik]

I think it's a toss-up for me between Jackie Brown and Once Upon a Time in Hollywood

[Destor]

The opening scene to bastard is his best scene though imo

[Destor]

I think it's a toss-up for me between Jackie Brown and Once Upon a Time in Hollywood
I love all his stuff so its not a big statement for me to say i love Jackie Brown. Forrester is sublime in it. Its one of my favorite performances. Ever.

[ron the dial]

jackie brown but it's obviously hard

i think my favorite tarantino script is true romance

[Destor]

A million actors couldve been Max Cherry but Forrester adds this...understated sorrow. Its phenomenal

[Destor]

jackie brown but it's obviously hard

i think my favorite tarantino script is true romancei, no joke, have the screenplay on my coffee table right now. Reading Natural Born Killers currently

[ron the dial]

I love all his stuff so its not a big statement for me to say i love Jackie Brown. Forrester is sublime in it. Its one of my favorite performances. Ever.

he and pam grier do enough acting for an entire career. amazing chemistry.

[slik]

I really wish he could have remade Casino Royale with Pierce Brosnan and Uma Thurman like he really wanted to...a QT Bond would have been so good

[Destor]

What i think is so strong about OUaTiH though is how naked the scrpit is. You can see clear as air whats going on at the other end of the pen. He's reflecting on his career and his childhood as he goes into his twilight. He's Rick Dalton. It makes the film honest in a way his other pictures probably are but are too personal for us to see. This one strips that away. It makes it very special and someone who isnt as young as he once was the more time goes by the more relatable it becomes.

[Blonde Moment]

The Hateful Eight
Jackie Brown
Reservoir Dogs

[Destor]

Death Proof is under-rated

[ron the dial]

it's funny because at the time i recall more people being into planet terror (or at least in my little sphere), but i only find myself returning to death proof.

[Destor]

Same. I own death proof, planet terror and the drindhouse Theatrical double feature. I nearly always just watch the death proof solo release. But everyone i know was firmly in the planet terror camp

[XL]

Got a lot of catching up to do on Tarantino. Still haven’t watched Django, Eight, or Hollywood.

[Seanny One Ball]

Quentin Tarantino is a complete freak and I can’t stand his face or voice but he has made a few pretty sweet films.

“Jackie Brown” is my favourite that he directed but I would say “True Romance” is the best thing he had any input into. Tony Scott was made for Tarantino, they should have done more together.

[Destor]

I love true romance and would like to see and edit in line with the screen play (and the ending put back)

[Seanny One Ball]

I’m trying to remember if it’s actually in the commentary for True Romance or if I heard it elsewhere but there’s a horrendous bit of audio from QT gushing over the Sicilian speech and how he stole it wholesale from a guy his mother was dating or some shit.
There’s nothing original in a Tarantino film and a lot of it is outright plagiarism, the bits that aren’t tend to be re-enactments of wet dreams he has had.

Analysis of any QT film reveals a sad little wanker of a man behind it.
Anybody who ever makes an independent film should have to watch fifty hours of Tarantino interviews just to make sure they know not to look, sound and act like a monumentally pretentious moron.

[Seanny One Ball]

I suppose if my whole career was based around copying B movies for Hollywood I’d be a defensive little prick too. I’d have a better name, haircut and reputation though.

[Seanny One Ball]

Michael Cimino was original and possibly the worst working director of all time but equal to Tarantino in arrogance, ugliness and lack of taste so it’s swings and roundabouts really

[Destor]

Awful take

[Fignuts]

What is everyone's favorite Tarantino film (there is obviously no wrong answer to this question)

Kill Bill

I realize that objectively it's not his best work, but I am a shameless mark for old spaghetti western and kung fu revenge tales, so I love it to death.

[Destor]

Are you counting them as one?

[Seanny One Ball]

Awful take



Not if you understand people and cinema.

[Seanny One Ball]

Destor you are a dilettante when it comes to film appreciation.
I do like your desire to review things, but what a lot of shite you come away with.

You sound like a kid at a table for adults.

[Seanny One Ball]

Mulholland Drive (2001) - 7/10


This is the kind of film that defies reviewing. The plot is impossible to summarize and its not meant to be digested linearly. This is the kind of film that improves with repeated viewings. What i can say is its an abstract film that tackles hollywood and the industry. There's a lot going on and it has more depth than i imagine 10 viewings could sift through. The journey and the performances were captivating but if you're not into abstract film making give this a hard pass.


What he doesn’t realise is that it’s a nonsense project made to impress numpties like him.

That’s the Lynch MO.

[Seanny One Ball]

Those are my good takes.

You don’t want none of that while you’re still growing son.

[Seanny One Ball]

I see you you big bastard. Come in here now and insult my opinions you pussy

[Destor]

I cant help you have the worst take possible. I could write a long winded post about how its not only impossible not to write based on lived experience but its impossible to even think without doing it but your point is so outlandishly bad that im simply going to roll my eyes and keep walking like i shouldve done when you challenged the idea of Kubrik being anything short of the most influential director of all time outside of Hitchcock.

Its a bad take. I was kind enough to not quote it in my reply so if you ever have enough sense to be embarrassed by it you could delete it to hide the evidence.

[Seanny One Ball]

Nice straw man bro, bravo.

I would have did you dirty more honestly but good for you.

[Destor]

No matter how wrong you are i still love you

[Seanny One Ball]

I know, I love you too.

[Seanny One Ball]

That’s the real Star Wars and I probably would be the chick, but whatevs bros it’s 2022

[OssMan]

Bridget Jones Diary

This movie is so fucking stupid... the entire premise falls apart when you realize that Bridget is sposto be fat, but she isn't fat, she is some hot ass woman. They made the actress gain 40 pounds for the movie and do a British accent, why wouldn't you just hire a heavier actor who already speaks British accent. I mean I know why but still. I don't understand the point of this movie... very clearly was trying to reimagine the book it was based on but I didn't know the book so it was disjointed and also just weird.

[Tom Guycott]

Michael Cimino was original and possibly the worst working director of all time but equal to Tarantino in arrogance, ugliness and lack of taste so it’s swings and roundabouts really

Okay, I know I made a joke before about you being a child and walking in on your mom being railed by Stanley Kubrick while filming it in like 47 takes, but I'm starting to wonder how close that is to some kind of truth with such vocal disdain for various directors...

Who was the actual film director that hurt you, Seanny?

You're in a safe place. You can tell us.

[El Vaquero de Infierno]

Michael Bay. But Michael Bay has violated us all at some point.

[Seanny One Ball]

Okay, I know I made a joke before about you being a child and walking in on your mom being railed by Stanley Kubrick while filming it in like 47 takes, but I'm starting to wonder how close that is to some kind of truth with such vocal disdain for various directors...

Who was the actual film director that hurt you, Seanny?

You're in a safe place. You can tell us.


If I didn’t have strong opinions that offended fags like you I’d just end up making something up to see you upset anyway so get over it.

[M-A-G]

Lightyear - 2 1/2 stars out of 4.

Animated and acted well enough but, man, does it start to drag in that second half. Which is a shame because the first half sets up some potentially good shit. Sox is easily the best thing about the movie and I found myself hanging on just to see what he would do next. There's nothing terribly offensive or awful about it, it just needed a better direction. I find it hard to believe that this is the favorite movie of an 8-year-old like Andy like the title card claims.

[Lock Jaw]

Amsterdam - 7.5/10

Watched it on the Disney+..... was enjoyable. Feel like I would have enjoyed the story a lot more as a book for some reason, but I was entertained.

[McLegend]

The Old Guard- 6.5/10 a more exciting version of The Eternals.

The Gray Man-5/10 all of the performances are good, but a lot of the action isn’t that great. Really tough to see and follow a lot of the time.

[OssMan]

Dude Where's My Car

A little funny... maybe 3 or 4 aspects that made me laugh. felt like there should have been more inuendo. Music was deece... did some good y2k nostalgia. Got kinda repetitive in act 3 and i was waiting for it to end

[Seanny One Ball]

I saw that at the cinema with a group of mates and we had a fine time. American Pie 2 still the most I have ever laughed in a cinema. People got up and moved.

[Lock Jaw]

Randomly rewatched the American Pie series the other month (main series only, not all the direct to DVD spin-offs)

[Seanny One Ball]

You missed out, James Gunn’s missus gets them out in The Book Of Love

[Seanny One Ball]

Google it I guess

[Seanny One Ball]

Watching “Barbarian” to see what all the fuss is about.
So far it seems like a classic set up but I hear there are twists aplenty.

[Seanny One Ball]

It’s playing heavily on classical xenophobia(not modern usage) and the fear of causing offence which is underused in horror.

[Lock Jaw]

You missed out, James Gunn’s missus gets them out in The Book Of Love

I have seen them all, I just didn't watch them in my series rewatch....

[Seanny One Ball]

Those are worth seeing again you big gay

[Lock Jaw]

Maybe Band Camp and Book of Love.... don't remember the others as being worth it... but maybe I am wrong

[Seanny One Ball]

Barbarian - 2.5/4

The first act is very well played and it puts you in the mood for a mystery rather than a far fetched horror film. The second act is trying to be too clever after a ridiculous transition and it falls flat for me, though I appreciate what was attempted with the social commentary. The third act tries to pull the madness together but the personification of the back story as a villain was just plain silly. I felt a bit robbed after such a great introduction to the story which is a shame because there was a lot of good stuff later on in there that didn’t require anything quite so daft topping it off.

If you didn’t enjoy “Don’t Breathe” then probably give this a miss.

[Seanny One Ball]

Maybe Band Camp and Book of Love.... don't remember the others as being worth it... but maybe I am wrong

I was talking about her tits you boob

[Lengua]

Kill Bill

I realize that objectively it's not his best work, but I am a shameless mark for old spaghetti western and kung fu revenge tales, so I love it to death.

It's my favorite to for the above reasons and that fucking soundtrack. The 1st one was so good the 2nd one had no where to go but down.

[Lock Jaw]

Guillermo del Toro's Pinnochio - 7.5/10

Not sure who exactly the target audience was for this, with the singing but also the fascism and other creepy stuff.... but I was entertained. Better than the live action Disney one.

[Lock Jaw]

Boosting it to 8/10 after watching the behind the scenes thing they put out too....

[Seanny One Ball]

Kill Bill was alright but that stupid “Beatrix Kiddo” maguffin annoyed the hell out of me.

[Seanny One Ball]

Slik have you seen “Something In The Dirt” yet?
I am watching it now. I also need to see “Synchronic” and “Spring”.

[Seanny One Ball]

Spring is very hard to find online, at least it was until I found it today.

[Seanny One Ball]

“Something In The Dirt” - 3.5/4

These guys should always be in their films. They are fantastic actors and this is a great vehicle for their performances to carry a mysteriously vague, yet oddly detailed story towards an ending that will confuse and infuriate some and which creates more questions about the world in which these stories take place.
I think when it comes down to it there is so much detail and inner-world speculation that it helps me get right on board with their films because the characters are asking the questions we are. A lot of films like to gloss over things. These guys like creating scenarios that raise more and more questions until the incidents become secondary to hypotheses but add greatly to the overall intrigue.

I liked it a lot, I think it’s a character study rather than a genre film, but it has a consistent sense of unease about it much like their previous work.

[Seanny One Ball]

Benson and Moorehead make fucking great films. “Synchronic” is yet another in-world film but not starring them. A designer drug that you can time travel with. It is far better than it sounds and it keeps the mysterious red plant story going and expands upon it greatly.
I think they put that plant in every film…it certainly gets mentioned a lot.
So many possibilities.

[Lock Jaw]

Violent Night - 7.5/10

Was entertained.

[rez]

Watched Terror Train a little bit ago on Tubi. I didn't realize it was a remake of a 1980 Jamie Lee Curtis flick. It was alright...there's a sequel coming out soon.

[Seanny One Ball]

I always meant to watch the JLC horrors from her early career but the poster for Terror Train is laughably bad so I never gave any of the others much consideration.
Trading Places is good for a wank if you have A-B repeat though, just saying.

[rez]

Horror is my favorite genre. That being said, I was never a huge fan of the Halloween movies. I was more of a Jason/FreddyChucky/VHS rental B level movies fan.

What came first? rez and his Sears/JCP Christmas catalog lingerie or 80's horror titties? I'm not sure now!

[Seanny One Ball]

Horror is one of my least favoured genres but it has given me more memories than most.

“The Hitcher” is a film that I would call purebred horror but that could be called a psychological thriller. I suppose it’s what scares you that matters.

[Seanny One Ball]

I had a recurring nightmare about Rutger Hauer for years. He would do his hitcher routine then I’d end up pulling my own teeth out.

[rez]

Big Girls Don't Cry... They Get Even (aka Step Kids). aka one of the trailers on the TMNT Secret of the Ooze VHS.

I think I watched it when it came out but I woulda been little. It's got Kevin McCallister's sister Meghan in the lead role and a buncha popular actors of the time.

I liked it.

You recognize it.

<iframe width="951" height="713" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/W0iWUDy75XA" title="Big girls don't cry they get even trailer" frameborder="0" allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen></iframe>

[drave]

OMFG!!!


I remember the tag line "Coming relatively to a theater near you" after watching that.


100% watched that movie.

[drave]

Reminds me of the Pizza Hut commercial on the TMNT VHS.




IIIIIII plaaaaaay, right-field, where the dandelions grow........


and some kid catches a ball, they go celebrate at pizza hut. Gonna find it and feed you nostalgia junkies your fix.

[drave]

<iframe width="1039" height="779" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/VIPUCPMd_nA" title="Pizza Hut Little League Commercial (1990) - From Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles VHS" frameborder="0" allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen></iframe>

[drave]

Apparently there's a whole god damn channel of retro VHS TV stuff!




https://www.youtube.com/@reeyees3

[rez]

Feed me the good stuff straight into my veins

[rez]

How about that Pepsi vhs commercial. Got a Pepsi for me? Who knew!

<iframe width="951" height="713" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/n1ZAygriMfI" title="Pepsi attitude commercial (Home Alone VHS)" frameborder="0" allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen></iframe>

[rez]

Fern Gully....The last rain forest

<iframe width="951" height="713" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/SzPrOFrVDz8" title="FernGully: The Last Rainforest (1992) - 1991 teaser trailer [VHS 720p60]" frameborder="0" allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen></iframe>

[drave]

Loved Fern Gully as a kid.

[ron the dial]

i wore my tmnt vhs out as a kid and watching that pizza hut commercial was an integral part of every viewing.

[rez]

The Burger King Kids Club

[ron the dial]

100% had this one

https://i2.wp.com/serialkillercalendar.com/VHSWASTELAND/HIGH-RES-VHS-COVERS/TEENAGE-MUTANT-NINJA-TURTLES-THE-GREAT-BOLDINI-BURGER-KING-KIDS-CLUB.jpg

[slik]

I always meant to watch the JLC horrors from her early career

The Fog is my favorite horror film of all-time

[ron the dial]

The Fog is my favorite horror film of all-time
well this post isn't going to help this

adrienne barbeaubot

[rez]

<iframe width="1070" height="713" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/7zlvyiB6_2w" title="Suburban Commando Trailer 1991" frameborder="0" allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen></iframe>

[OssMan]

Semi Pro

Pretty funny... cool Andre 3000 role

[poopfromweiner dude]

Anyone see the new Pussen boots

seeing it next week

[Seanny One Ball]

The Fog is my favorite horror film of all-time


Yeah I know, you say this every so often.
I still think it’s an odd favourite to have, even if it is good and has a classic feel to it.

[OssMan]

Avatar 2

With all the spectacle of the first one removed this ones pretty medium... couldnt tell who anyone was... also its so fucking long... they shouldnt be allowed to make movies that long

[El Vaquero de Infierno]

<iframe width="1070" height="713" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/7zlvyiB6_2w" title="Suburban Commando Trailer 1991" frameborder="0" allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen></iframe>

I was thinking about that film the other day. One of those movies that seemed to be shown on TV fairly regularly back in the early to mid 90s, usually on a Sunday afternoon.

[rez]

*Movie producer snorts a line of coke*

"Hear me out! Hulk Hogan - That wrestling dude (peak Hulk) is a space alien that saves that that that doc guy from Back to the Future and Taxi!"

[Destor]

Annie Hall - 8/10


Gooder

[Lock Jaw]

Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery - 8/10

Started off slower than the first one but I ended up really enjoying it. Too bad it didn't get a wider/longer theatrical release....

[OssMan]

"Code Pere Noel" or some shit... really fucking funny French movie thats like Home Alone vs Santa Claus. Really fucking funny... very high production value... good

[slik]

Glass Onion - 8.5/10

I thought this was really good -- there are several shots that remind me of famous paintings -- a well written satire/whodunit and different from Knives Out.

That said, I did enjoy Knives Out more.

[Lock Jaw]

Knives Out definitely better.

[OssMan]

The Whale

I should read Moby Dick

[OssMan]

Kimi

eh

[Lock Jaw]

Avatar: The Way of Water - 7.5/10

Was "too long" but once it got started it became pretty ok, and the climax was pretty sweet...

Felt like it took them a "long time" to get out of the forest and go to the water place, which ended up being for a pretty flimsy reason.... probably wasn't even that long, just felt like it.... and then when they got to the water place it got a bit better due to the "neat visuals"....

Feel like there were too many characters for sure.... was thinking the whole time "why is this one brother even necessary in the story?" and then he died so that was why I guess....

Overall the story was "flimsier" than the first one, and not like the first one was super strong and complicated..... this one just felt like it lost a bit of the "charm"....

Final fight and Titanic scenes were more enjoyable than the final fight of the first one, but the first one made more sense

[M-A-G]

Strange World: 2 and 3/4 stars out of 4

I liked it fine enough. The pulp-style presentation is pretty neat as it has this throwback feel to something like Journey to the Center of the Earth. The "world", such as it is, is nice to look at and the characters are likeable enough.

The story is kind of paint-by-numbers, though, and it pales in comparison to stuff like Raya and the Last Dragon and even Encanto where they tackled family generational issues, too. I was into it, though, probably because of my own abrasive relationship with my father. It's a shame it bombed as I think people would've been OK with at least one viewing of it, but on the other hand I don't think it's anything you need to go out of your way to see.

[The Mackem]

Top Gun: Maverick 2/5. Ok for a bit of nostalgia

[OssMan]

An Education

Not sure who told me to watch this. It's about a Jew who grooms a young girl... Gotta hope the libs of tik tok crowd doesnt get word of this one

[The Mackem]

<iframe width="1070" height="713" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/7zlvyiB6_2w" title="Suburban Commando Trailer 1991" frameborder="0" allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen></iframe>

This is the exact same trailer that I had on a VHS for something like Hook or TMNT2:Secret of the ooze. I haven’t seen Suburban Commando but can imagine the best bits are in that trailer.

[rez]

This is the exact same trailer that I had on a VHS for something like Hook or TMNT2:Secret of the ooze. I haven’t seen Suburban Commando but can imagine the best bits are in that trailer.

twas. you should check it out

[drave]

should also look up there ^^^^^

[Seanny One Ball]

An Education

Not sure who told me to watch this. It's about a Jew who grooms a young girl... Gotta hope the libs of tik tok crowd doesnt get word of this one



There’s an Austrian film called “Michael” you should watch.

[rez]

Terror Train II. This film series shoulda had some marketing and been put in theaters. I think it would have been successful.

Fun popcorn movie. 7.7/10

[Lock Jaw]

Tolkien - 3/10

Was like one interesting part in the entire movie maybe

[El Vaquero de Infierno]

Lawrence of Arabia 8/10

I've seen little bits of it in the past, but this was my first time watching the film in its entirety: all 3 hours 47 mins of it.

Bladder busting, bum numbingly long but worth the slog. It seems like a film that would benefit from being seen on a cinema screen rather than that of a laptop for the full effect.

With white actors browned up and the casual racism, I wonder whether they even show this film on TV these days.

[McLegend]

21 Bridges- 10/10

[Big Vic]

Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery - 8/10

Started off slower than the first one but I ended up really enjoying it. Too bad it didn't get a wider/longer theatrical release....

I couldn't finish this movie, hated it.

[Lock Jaw]

Just watched it again to spite you. Was still very enjoyable.

[xrodmuc316]

Undertaker as a bad guy with the kid voice, CLASSIC!

eYQbQ2Xgar4

[Destor]

Glass Onion (A Knives Out Mystery) - 6/10

The fundamental issue with the movie is does the one thing a Whodunnit absolutely can never do: its stupid. It tries to make that a plot point but it doesnt work. Its never clever. The characters are all very weak and honestly calling them characters is wrong to begin with. Theyre paper thin memes. The performances are good and I always like Jessica Henwick just as a rule.

Kate Hudson remains a smoke show and i would drink her bath water.

[Destor]

Shoutout to the original Scream. It reamins the most recent truly great Whodunnit

[drave]

Our son is a HUGE horror fan, tons of collectibles (including an autographed Jason mask from Kane Hodder and autographed pic of "The Shape" from Nick Castle ((fun fact, The Shape was the name of the Michael Myers character before they gave him a name))



He watched the OG scream with my wife and I last Halloween and was hooked. He started getting Ghostface merch after, and even got a shirt for Christmas. I was worried because it had some pink writing on it, but he didn't even care. Woot.


Scream remains a solid great movie, and I'm the type of person who really dislikes multiple re-watches (I get bored).

[ron the dial]

the menu - 9/10

i absolutely loved this movie. the marketing campaign has you thinking it will be a cannibal affair, and it absolutely is not. everyone turns in really solid performances, but extra special praise to ralph fiennes, anya taylor-joy, and especially nicholas hoult. he really shines when he's playing a bit of a creep, and he's a real scum bag in this one.

it's working in a similar world to glass onion thematically in that it certainly critiques the rich, but this does it in a more elegant way through the use of artistry and the service industry. the intertitles for each course are also great, and get increasingly funnier as the action goes the opposite way. i will definitely be watching this one again.

[ron the dial]

and i have to concur with destor on glass onion. i wanted to like it more, and it is a fun movie, but it's as deep as a puddle across the board. considering i spotted the hand off between norton and bautista that lead to bautista's death, that part of the mystery was already done for me and it made getting there for the finale a bit tedious. i agree that all of the performances were great, and i'll give a special tip of the hat to janelle monae for convincingly playing two different parts.

[Destor]

You forgot to mention kate hudson is sex incarnate

[Destor]

I preordered The Menu based of WeXs take. Anya Taylor Joy is the best young actress going so its an easy purchase. Her eye for scripts (or her agents at least) is highly consistent.

[ron the dial]

You forgot to mention kate hudson is sex incarnate
she did look absolutely stunning

[ron the dial]

I preordered The Menu based of WeXs take. Anya Taylor Joy is the best young actress going so its an easy purchase. Her eye for scripts (or her agents at least) is highly consistent.

i wish that i enjoyed last night in soho more than i did, but she made it worth watching. she's really grown on me over the past year or so. not that i didn't like her before, i just wasn't paying enough attention.

[Destor]

Soho was visually captivating. Story stumbled on a few beats but i really liked the movie. As much for its technical aspects as anything. Some of those shots were REALLY complex

[ron the dial]

agreed. they had me hooked with the ads giving a very suspiria-esque vibe with the lighting alone.

[Seanny One Ball]

I watched “The Menu” a couple of nights ago and it was very good. Ralph Fiennes is always good but Nicholas Hoult caught me off guard with how well he turned in a character performance to support ATJ, and Fiennes.

Tonight I’m watching “The Banshees of Inisherin” and I had to pause it in the middle just to post that it’s shaping up to be Martin Mcdonagh’s best film. I might do a proper review because his and his brother’s films are always worth watching a few times each. It’s films like these that make film the greatest art form for me.

[Seanny One Ball]

That was quite the film…
Though it feels almost as if the other Mcdonagh brother wrote it. It’s reminiscent more of “Calvary” than “In Bruges” but it’s another film about deep, dark interpersonal shit and the good old human condition. Colin Farrell was great in this, this is probably the best performance he will ever give.

[Destor]

Manhattan (1979) - 7/10

I loved the visuals. Especially the city shots. Film is done in black and white and coupled with an outstanding score it creates a very old hollywood feel and aesthetic. Easily its peak is the atmosphere.

I think what makes it inferior to Annie Hall is its 3rd act is a bit of a mess on the page and on the screen. Its a fine romcom that isnt really about the specific relationships so much as a meta commentary on dating in the period. Objectively a lot of that is lost as the now of it has become then and with that change we see the details of the moment fade beyond memory.

All of it works though. Until the 3rd act when it just becomes a bit of a jumbled mess. Some characters who were played for laughs are now needed for higher drama and there's no character progression getting them or the audience there, and theyre still sort of played for laughs on top of it, leaving a string of scenes that just kind of fall apart.

Ultimately i think Allen had something say on dating at that time of his life but didnt have an answer to the problems, and who does really. The problem is if he had admitted that he'd have had a better ending.

[Destor]

Its still good and very funny. Its just not as good as it should have been

[Destor]

I loved the visuals. Especially the city shots. Film is done in black and white and coupled with an outstanding score it creates a very old hollywood feel and aesthetic. Easily its peak is the atmosphere.
Thinking about this a bit more. The visual/audio style call back to a bygone era mostly of the 50s. This would have played nostalgicly in 79. This is juxtaposed over the material which is the state of dating post the sexual revolution. It doesnt impact the 3rd act in any way but it adds a layer to the style of the film thats worth noting.

[Seanny One Ball]

Soon Ye will see a sexual revolution, just be sure to keep your night light on after Rosemary goes to bed.

[Destor]

The Purple Rose of Cario- 7/10

Im struggling to put my thoughts together on this. Its impressive how on the surface this is a very digestible film. Easy to follow and straight forward. A woman during the great depression who is broke and married to the worst kind of man uses film to escape her life and imagine happiness. One the day reality breaks and a character leaps from the screen and falls in love with her.

The movie is genuinely funny and jeff daniels, playing two characters, is a show stealer. But under all that is a much more interesting film and im trying to get a handle on it. Woody Allen has touched on the essence of not just the catharsis of film but in dreaming. Longing. And how film, perhaps more broadly; narrative as a whole, facilitates that.

This is definitely a picture I'll have to chew on a bit to really be able to put it into words. On the surface its very cute. Some of this bits are as funny as they were 30+ years ago. The romantic, and idyllic, scenes maintain the magic of the classic film. All while being underpinned with a really rich layer depth that seems to go as deep as youll care to look.

And at no point does it demand you look any deeper than the surface. A lesson modern film could really learn from.

[xrodmuc316]

Knowing (2009)
https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/0/08/Knowingposter08.jpg
- negative/10

Holy shit was this movie a let down. It has a cool concept, and just as you are gearing up thinking it is gonna be Nick Cage and his kid racing to prevent various disasters in an exciting way, they figure out everybody is gonna die. Then there is like Aliens or Time Travelers or some shit who show up to save kids, take them to a tree planet, and then it just ends with "EE" dying.

[ron the dial]

just watched the trailer for ari aster's beau is afraid. got major charlie kaufman vibes and I dig it.

[Seanny One Ball]

Charlie Kaufman is one of the better writers and one of the worst directors, which is something I suppose.
I guess I’ll avoid that like the plague until any and all hype dies down so I can trash it to my own standards if need be.

[Fignuts]

just watched the trailer for ari aster's beau is afraid. got major charlie kaufman vibes and I dig it.

Yeah, that one looks really great.

Fuckin' A24 dude. Always reliable.

[Ruthervin]

That movie Get Out from 2017 was pretty good. Didn’t expect it to be that great but it was!

[Ruthervin]

I also liked that movie UnFriended from 2014.

[Fignuts]

If you liked unfriended, look up Host.

[Ruthervin]

If you liked unfriended, look up Host.

Will do thanks man

[Seanny One Ball]

“Sick” - 2/4

Standard slasher fare dressed up as Covid commentary. The unforgivable crime was making the hot protagonist look less hot as the film progressed. Whatever happened to Ally MacGraw’s syndrome for horror, huh? Jamie Lee Curtis Concussion or something…

[Fignuts]

The Menu- 8/10

Such enjoyable performances from everyone involved. Sense of disbelief takes a beating in certain parts, but given that there are very clear satirical elements, thats excusable.

[Lock Jaw]

The Kings of the World - 7.7/10 Sad story......

Fall - 6/10 Friend wouldn't shut up about it so I watched it... was pretty much what you'd expect....

[Seanny One Ball]

Fall is just tits on a pole

[Lock Jaw]

As DAMN iNATOR would put it, those were a nice couple of reasons to enjoy the movie at least a little bit.

[McLegend]

Rurouni Kenshin “The Beginning” 7.5/10

Rurouni Kenshin “The Final” 6.5/10 The action is great, but there was 30-45 minutes where not much happened. Also they used a few too many scenes from “The Beginning.” Again though great action.

Rurouni Kenshin “Orgins” 8/10 awesome all the way around.

So I watched movies 4 and 5 of the series first, because I thought I had scene the first 3 movies. After watching clips of the first 3 movies on YouTube I realized I had never seen them.

So either way these are really awesome anime adaptations. It’s really hard to believe how good the movies are. The fights are really good and really
impressive how they were able to bring them into a live action movie.

[ClockShot]

Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery - 4/5

I thought the first one was slightly better.

[slik]

Skinamarink - 8/10

I really enjoyed this.

Note - this type of movie will not be for everyone. It's a very liminal spaces meets found footage type of film...it's not a traditional movie. I really enjoyed it and have gathered the part that caught me most 'off guard' is the same part that caught everyone else most off guard while watching.

[slik]

M3GAN - 8/10

What a fun horror film. That was a good time.

[Seanny One Ball]

Spring - 3/4

I forgot to watch this after I found it online and ended up watching it two nights ago. I went in knowing it was created entirely by two geniuses and bore the typical hallmarks of their outstanding filmography - tiny cast, ethereal atmosphere intermittently disturbed by the precipice of an unseen abyss, real dialogue… Every film that Benson and Moorhead make is special for the pleasure it brings on both sides of the creative fence. The viewers get a great gift and it’s always given with a wry, knowing smile.

If anybody hated “The Shape Of Water” as much as I did and for the same reasons - watch “Spring”.
Lou Pucci is always a great choice in a dialogue driven film with dark/light running parallel through it(watch “Thumbsucker”) because he looks like he has attitude born from tragedy in the centre of his soul.

I wasn’t particularly impressed by the actress opposite him but she had a lot of disadvantages going into it so it’s a minor quibble that possibly won’t matter when I see it again.

[slik]

I really like SPRING

Before I read what you wrote I said to myself "I hope it's the horror movie from Moorhead/Benson" so I was very happy to see it was indeed

[Seanny One Ball]

They’re creating an entire universe one film at a time. I didn’t see the red flower/drug in this one though, but I probably missed it.

[Seanny One Ball]

“Housebound” - 3/4

From the mind behind “M3GAN” coincidentally, and a very funny if slightly exasperating horror comedy. It reminded me of “A Fantastic Fear Of Everything” only with a bigger cast and more contrived plot but with a far higher laugh ratio and some real horror in it.
New Zealand cinema is either dark and dramatic or dark yet absurdly funny. Watch out South Korea…

[Seanny One Ball]

I’ll watch M3GAN later tonight.

[Helmsphere]

M3GAN - 8.5/10

Best Terminator movie since T2.

[Seanny One Ball]

M3GAN - 3/4
Riddled with inconsistencies but visually impressive and sharply written for some dark laughs. I wanted the robot to win.

[Seanny One Ball]

I think that is actually a 3/4 film in retrospect.
I did enjoy it a lot.

[Seanny One Ball]

Slik advising me to watch a 15K budget film now…

This isn’t the 80’s anymore… lies have clearly been told here with regards to budgets. A break down is necessary.

[Seanny One Ball]

I haven’t seen any of it, but unless it’s 90 minutes of iPhone footage released directly onto a streaming site with no advertising or production of any kind…it didn’t cost 15K.

“It cost us 15 K to film the footage” is possible. Maybe.

[slik]

Candy Land - 6.5

I can tell the director has promise but not everything lands in this horror flick. Some good and creative ideas, but I think there's a better film in the future from whomever made this, but this wasn't quite there yet

[Lock Jaw]

M3GAN - 8/10

Was enjoyable

[slik]

The Price We Pay - 3.5

It started as an interesting film and then became a cheap, uninteresting and stupid film.

[rez]

Gonna watch M3GAN tonight or tomorrow.

[rez]

M3GAN pretty good. The CEO and his assistant are either horrible actors or were given shitty direction tho....

[M-A-G]

The Muppets/Muppets Most Wanted - 3 stars out of 4

Watched them both back-to-back and I think they both deserve the same rating, however, for completely different reasons.

Speaking as someone who wasn't really raised on the Muppets, having missed out on the original show and a lot of the major motion pictures, I can honestly say that the first movie of this bunch still managed to pluck at the right strings. There's this air of innocence to it. Like the town from the beginning is something out of Norman Rockwell, but at the same time, as with everything else, you're also supposed to laugh at the level of absurdity it reaches. The story hits the right beats as it cleverly tackles the real-life journey that the Muppets property has taken over the years. They kind of were forgotten relics and the film knows how to play with your emotions. The movie also makes me wish that other properties that try to meld human actors with fictional characters take more of a page from the Muppets as the human cast is equally enjoyable. It's nostalgia done right and I feel bad that I didn't watch it sooner.

Now with the follow up, Muppets Most Wanted, the filmmakers say, "OK, enough with the mushy stuff. Let's go nuts!" A criminal doppelganger of Kermit the Frog? Yes. Tina Fey as a Russian gulag warden? Sure, why not? It's basically The Great Muppet Caper but with better focus and snappier exchanges and gags. And like Caper benefitted from the phenomenal Charles Grodin, this film also earns points with the comedically villainous Constantine. Everything about him is just ridiculously gold. Like blowing up a payphone right after using it; did he have to do that? No, of course not, but just the fact that he would do something like that is funny. Other visual gags also hit bullseyes, like the battle of the badges with Sam the Eagle, the small INTERPOL car, the Vaseline on the camera lens, or the fact that it's obviously not Jason Segal and Amy Adams in the beginning number. The more over-the-top, the better. Like I love the warden saying, "Good night, Danny Trejo" as if it's not just him playing a character in prison. It's actually THE Danny Trejo locked up. The plot is absolutely cliche but they have fun with it, so as a result, we have fun with it. Both of these movies are excellent returns to form.

[Seanny One Ball]

Murder By Death - 2.5/4

Very funny but dwindling returns on gags by the finale. Peter Sellars knew good racial comedy.

The Frisco Kid - 2/4

Embarrassingly bad in parts, fucking hilarious in others.
LOL’d at the dancing in the street screaming “Wahoo!” part.

[ron the dial]

15 minutes into skinamarink and i don't think i am gonna last the full hour and forty. complete waste of time. seems like maybe something might start happening now...

[Fignuts]

Maybe by the end it will go apeshit like malignant

[ron the dial]

absolute dog shit. possibly the most boring movie i have ever seen. MAYBE could have worked as a short but dreadful as a feature. 2/10. close to a 1 honestly.

[ron the dial]

Maybe by the end it will go apeshit like malignant

yeah but i was feeling nalignant from the outset. that it went absolutely bonkers at the end was just the icing on the cake.

[Seanny One Ball]

absolute dog shit. possibly the most boring movie i have ever seen. MAYBE could have worked as a short but dreadful as a feature. 2/10. close to a 1 honestly.


Slik tried to make me endure this.
Luckily I have never trusted Slik.
I do love him though.

[ron the dial]

because i'm a masochist i followed that up with shotgun wedding. 3/10, pretty high body count and decent action, awful performances, jlo still unbelievably attractive.

maybe i should consider something i have higher hopes for this weekend. i do want to see Infinity pool.

[ron the dial]

how do i wash my brain of this skinamarink stink???

[ron the dial]

slik how on earth...

[Fignuts]

Barbarian 7/10
Enjoyed this a good bit. Inspired by a true story too, which is fucked up.

Black Adam 3/10
Only redeeming quality of this, is its fun to watch Adam fuck up army dudes. Awful dialogue, awful acting. Rock doesn't play Black Adam. He plays a slightly meaner version of the same guy he plays in every other movie.

[Seanny One Ball]

No way was Barbarian inspired by anything remotely true

[Seanny One Ball]

It was fun though

[Fignuts]

No way was Barbarian inspired by anything remotely true

Google Josef Fritzel

[Seanny One Ball]

The Wild Bunch - 4/4

Perfect.

Ride The High Country - 3.5/4

A forgotten classic. No showboating in any way, pure performance. Peckinpah wasn’t all stunts. He knew a great story could work on its own if he had no cash for big explosions.

The Ballad Of Cable Hogue - 3/4

Brilliant but sketchy. Sympathy is hard to come by but that ending is pretty good. Unique at least. Another performance based western. Westerns were all about story and scenery usually, at least until big budgets allowed for your Peckinpah style violence and grit. I always like a Randolph Scott style film where it’s about law, order and sorting it all out within 90 minutes. This film is like somebody just made a western without any cool stuff and only really grim, dirty reality. It works because Jason Robards is the perfect Everyman and his antics are really a sideshow towards a story that feels a little bit more advanced for a Western.

[Seanny One Ball]

Google Josef Fritzel


I know who Fritzl is. This film bares no relation to the man. Guys have been locking up their kids/women off the street for years without ever creating a superhuman.

Fuck are you on about bro?

[Blonde Moment]

how do i wash my brain of this skinamarink stink???

near dark
30 days of night

[Seanny One Ball]

Ben Foster has an incredible bit-part in 30 Days Of Night and it was that performance which made me think that some day he’d win an Oscar.

[Seanny One Ball]

I’ve been surprised by how poorly Ben Foster has followed up “Leave No Trace”. His agent needs firing, the guy is clearly chasing an award in the wrong places. That WW2 boxing film he did was prime 50’s Oscar fodder, but it fell flatter than a nun’s tit coming out now.

Emile Hirsch should be doing better too.
All of the talent in the world.

[drave]

I quite enjoy villian work by Peter Stormare.


He also had a series of commercials for some Volkswagen car that were funny as hell.

[Blue Demon]

Precious Cargo....0/10....pretty terrible

[Fignuts]

Now I have to watch Skinimarink, just to see how bad it is.

[ron the dial]

i pray you are capable of finding something worthwhile there. otherwise i am so sorry.

[slik]

slik how on earth...

We are on total opposite sides on this one :lol:

[Fignuts]

Skinamarink- 2/10

Fuck you, slik.

[slik]

It's definitely the most divisive horror flick in a while, even on Rotten Tomatoes

People like it or hate it, there's zero middle ground

[Seanny One Ball]

I’d better get in on this before the hype dies down

[GD]

I’ve seen a few of movies since I left. I should lisy them soon.

[Fignuts]

It's definitely the most divisive horror flick in a while, even on Rotten Tomatoes

People like it or hate it, there's zero middle ground

There are a few moments that would be good as a 20 second tik tok video, but making a whole movie out it is just a bore.

[Seanny One Ball]

Disagree with Peter and MJ chemistry. I thought they worked great together, honestly.

Also, Seanny is right. Holland has defined the role. He's awesome in it.

Tho it'd never happen, I'd love a Spider-verse film bringing Toby and Andrew back for one more film.


Remember that time Damian Rey predicted Marvel’s biggest surprise?

[slik]

There are a few moments that would be good as a 20 second tik tok video, but making a whole movie out it is just a bore.

I do wish it was about 65 -70 min long...it needs to shave some time off

[slik]

Trying to find Knock at the Cabin online but not having luck on the sites I use so far...

[Seanny One Ball]

I’ve just stuck “Skinamarink” on.

I will do one of my in-action reviews.
If I hate it badly enough, the juice might be worth the squeeze…

[Seanny One Ball]

This is painfully slow already. No dialogue… just things moving slowly or not at all.

[Seanny One Ball]

This is going to get me twitching and angry if it stays like this.

It’s filmed in some static effect.
This was made in an app wasn’t it

[Seanny One Ball]

Cool, somebody spoke and a light turned on.
It took 9 minutes to happen.

[Seanny One Ball]

This is bad man.
This is deliberately bad.
Or made by an autist…not auteur.

[Seanny One Ball]

Camera angles deliberately obfuscate every occurrence, not that there are many. There’s a terrible static effect, the audio is rank and it all seems to be played as though somebody left a camera recording on the floor despite the constant scene shifting.

The dialogue is all oblique, the footage is all oblique.

It isn’t interesting, most importantly.
I am 19 minutes in.

[Seanny One Ball]

I’m done.

I can’t watch that shit.

Well done to the creator for conning the money men into buying it. That takes the cake.

[Seanny One Ball]

Washing my eyes and ears out with a classic Western “The Professionals”.
It will undoubtedly have lots of occurrences and dialogue, probably cost £15,000,000 instead of £15 though…. worth it.

[Seanny One Ball]

Trying to decide which western to watch next because I am going round the big stars and trying not to focus on anybody too much. Might be back to Clint, John Wayne or Sam Peckinpah… cannot decide. I could start on the Jimmy Stewart stuff but he’s awful gangly for a cowboy.
High Noon was good, not as great as everyone says but for when it came out it had a lot of great stuff.

Hmmm

[Seanny One Ball]

Burt Lancaster and Lee Marvin are great in The Professionals, it’s a classic pairing of tough and unforgiving matched with cool, risky and fun. I like Burt Lancaster, I should watch more of his stuff…he’s not hard to like. Lee Marvin is also great but it strikes me funny that all of these actors likely fought in at least one war so they were all a lot tougher than today’s lot.
Burt Lancaster wouldn’t be a pretty boy today. He’d be the Lee Marvin guy. Lee Marvin would have to play a baddie…

[Fignuts]

About a year ago, I watched a bunch of amatuer, found footage horror movies on youtube, hoping to find a hidden gem. There was no hidden gem. Just the worst attempts at cinema I had ever seen. Skinamirink fits right in with those abortions.

[Seanny One Ball]

There was nothing good in the half hour I watched. Literally nothing.
When that happens you have to cut your losses. No film deserves more than half an hour to get the ball rolling.

[Seanny One Ball]

If it was sold as maybe some sort of art experience then ok, but it’s not a movie.
Things have to move in a movie.

[Seanny One Ball]

They don’t call them stilly’s

[Blonde Moment]

Trying to decide which western to watch next because I am going round the big stars and trying not to focus on anybody too much. Might be back to Clint, John Wayne or Sam Peckinpah… cannot decide. I could start on the Jimmy Stewart stuff but he’s awful gangly for a cowboy.
High Noon was good, not as great as everyone says but for when it came out it had a lot of great stuff.

Hmmm

Once Upon a Time in the West

[Seanny One Ball]

A fine Western. Probably the best role Charles Bronson ever had because they keep him quiet for most of it and Henry Fonda is playing evil incarnate as the antagonist. Best use of a harmonica too.
I’m watching a wide array of Westerns right now. I’m not tired of them and I doubt I ever will be. Tonight I’m going to check out:

The Outlaw Josey Wales
Rio Bravo
Any Randolph Scott film

I am due a deep dive into the Audie Murphy stuff but I am saving that so I can link it up with his War stuff. I’m still holding off on the Jimmy Stewart stuff because he’s just awful isn’t he? Jimmy Stewart is too wimpy for the genre.

[Seanny One Ball]

Randolph Scott makes the best short westerns. Almost none of them are 90 minutes, loads are 78-80 minutes…
You can see the money was used sparingly but I will always love practical effects and every Western uses them. It’s a box that has to be ticked if you are making one.
I can’t accuse most Westerns of feeling too natural but a few of the big players always know their role. John Wayne, Randolph Scott and Henry Fonda can carry the atmosphere that the film needs, guys like Lee Marvin, Burt Lancaster and Van Heflin all just play essential character roles every time. Strother Martin is always a name you want to see involved if there’s moral ambiguity. Warren Oats too, both have marvellous western faces.

Men with a purpose.

I love Westerns.

[Seanny One Ball]

Think I have to watch “Soldier Blue” again. I remember thinking it was a bit more grown up when I saw it as a kid.